1 00:00:09,600 --> 00:00:12,160 Well, here we are! Hedgewick's World! 2 00:00:12,240 --> 00:00:15,560 The biggest and best amusement park there will ever be 3 00:00:15,640 --> 00:00:18,680 and we've got a golden ticket! Eh? Eh? Fun! 4 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:20,600 Fun? 5 00:00:20,680 --> 00:00:23,240 Your stupid box can't even get us to the right place. 6 00:00:23,320 --> 00:00:25,320 This is like a moon base or something. 7 00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:26,520 Well, it's not the moon. 8 00:00:26,600 --> 00:00:29,920 Actually, I think it does look like the moon, only dirtier. 9 00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:32,840 Hey, guys. It's not the moon, okay? 10 00:00:33,160 --> 00:00:35,400 It's the Spacey Zoomer ride, or it was. 11 00:00:35,480 --> 00:00:39,480 Psst! Excuse I. I don't suppose you happen to be my lift off planet? 12 00:00:39,560 --> 00:00:41,560 Dave's Discount Interstellar Removals? 13 00:00:41,640 --> 00:00:42,640 'Fraid not. 14 00:00:42,720 --> 00:00:44,200 You know, they were meant to be here six months ago. 15 00:00:44,280 --> 00:00:46,480 Well, that's Dave for you, you see, unreliable. 16 00:00:46,960 --> 00:00:48,400 - Stay where you are! - Whoops! 17 00:00:48,680 --> 00:00:50,760 Throw down your weapons and identify yourselves! 18 00:00:51,480 --> 00:00:53,480 No! No weapons! 19 00:00:53,560 --> 00:00:56,840 Golden ticket! Spacey Zoomer! Free ice cream! 20 00:00:56,920 --> 00:00:58,120 Who are you? 21 00:00:58,200 --> 00:01:00,800 This planet is closed by Imperial order. 22 00:01:00,880 --> 00:01:01,880 How's this? 23 00:01:03,080 --> 00:01:05,160 Oh. Welcome, Proconsul. 24 00:01:05,240 --> 00:01:06,800 Wish they'd told us you were coming. 25 00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:08,960 - Any news of the Emperor? - Oh, the Emperor. 26 00:01:09,040 --> 00:01:11,360 No, no. None that you'd... 27 00:01:12,040 --> 00:01:13,520 We pray for his return. 28 00:01:13,600 --> 00:01:16,960 If there is anything you need, my platoon is at your service. 29 00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:20,000 Right, righty-o! Well, carry on, Captain. 30 00:01:20,960 --> 00:01:23,360 Platoon! Let's move out! 31 00:01:23,720 --> 00:01:28,480 On the double! Two, three, four. Two, three, four. Two, three, four. 32 00:01:29,280 --> 00:01:30,680 - Have they gone? - Yes. 33 00:01:31,320 --> 00:01:34,560 Uniforms. Give me the heebie-jeebies. Come on. 34 00:01:37,040 --> 00:01:39,560 They can't stop me being here but they don't like it. 35 00:01:39,640 --> 00:01:40,640 Ha ha! 36 00:01:41,440 --> 00:01:42,520 You see? 37 00:01:42,760 --> 00:01:44,240 I told you it was amazing. 38 00:01:44,560 --> 00:01:45,560 Well, it used to be. 39 00:01:45,960 --> 00:01:48,880 It closed down. Wish I'd known that before I landed here. 40 00:01:48,960 --> 00:01:51,360 But let me show you my collection. 41 00:01:51,440 --> 00:01:53,400 Come along. Follow me. This way. 42 00:01:53,480 --> 00:01:55,320 This way in. Come on! 43 00:01:55,800 --> 00:01:58,720 Welcome to my ship, Webley's World of Wonders. 44 00:01:59,360 --> 00:02:01,600 Miracles, marvels and more await you. 45 00:02:01,680 --> 00:02:04,480 I am Impresario Webley. 46 00:02:06,240 --> 00:02:09,480 You see before you waxwork representations. 47 00:02:09,720 --> 00:02:12,080 Of the famous... 48 00:02:12,240 --> 00:02:14,520 ...and the infamous. 49 00:02:14,720 --> 00:02:17,360 Anybody here play chess? 50 00:02:17,840 --> 00:02:19,640 Perhaps you, young man. 51 00:02:19,720 --> 00:02:22,000 Actually, I'm in my school chess club. 52 00:02:22,080 --> 00:02:24,000 Ah, follow me. 53 00:02:27,080 --> 00:02:31,000 Now, let me demonstrate to you all the wonder of the age, 54 00:02:31,080 --> 00:02:33,120 the miracle of modernity. 55 00:02:33,200 --> 00:02:35,840 We defeated them all a thousand years ago 56 00:02:35,920 --> 00:02:39,320 but now he's back to destroy you. 57 00:02:40,040 --> 00:02:42,160 Behold, the enemy! 58 00:02:43,000 --> 00:02:44,640 Cyberman! Get down! 59 00:03:20,440 --> 00:03:22,320 No need to panic, my young friends. 60 00:03:22,400 --> 00:03:24,760 We all know there are no more living Cybermen. 61 00:03:24,840 --> 00:03:26,920 What you are seeing is a miracle. 62 00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:30,600 The 699th wonder of the universe. 63 00:03:30,680 --> 00:03:33,240 Um, as displayed before the Imperial Court 64 00:03:33,400 --> 00:03:35,880 and only here to destroy you at chess! 65 00:03:36,400 --> 00:03:40,600 Careful, now. An empty shell. And yet it moves. 66 00:03:40,840 --> 00:03:41,840 How? 67 00:03:41,920 --> 00:03:44,560 - Magic. - That might well be, young lady. 68 00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:50,880 But a single penny wins you five Imperial shillings 69 00:03:51,360 --> 00:03:54,760 if you can beat this empty shell at chess. 70 00:03:55,000 --> 00:03:58,240 I haven't got a penny but I've got a sandwich! 71 00:03:58,600 --> 00:04:00,680 All right. Take a seat. 72 00:04:01,720 --> 00:04:05,520 It is free of all devices 73 00:04:05,960 --> 00:04:07,440 and yet it has never been beaten. 74 00:04:08,720 --> 00:04:11,080 Would you like to make the first move, young man? 75 00:04:17,520 --> 00:04:19,640 Oh, no, Artie. No, don't do that. 76 00:04:20,560 --> 00:04:22,960 That's a fool's mate. 77 00:04:24,520 --> 00:04:26,760 If you can tell me how it works, I'll give you a silver penny. 78 00:04:27,200 --> 00:04:30,400 I think you do it with mirrors? 79 00:04:31,280 --> 00:04:33,760 Hmm, mirrors. Clever girl. 80 00:04:34,160 --> 00:04:36,760 Well, let's see, hey? Low-tech. 81 00:04:37,080 --> 00:04:39,600 It's a puppet. Mono-filament strings, which means brains. 82 00:04:42,240 --> 00:04:43,560 - Hello. - Hello. 83 00:04:44,120 --> 00:04:46,240 - I'm the brains. - Hello. Give us a hand. 84 00:04:51,040 --> 00:04:52,280 They call me Porridge. 85 00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:54,600 Oh, it's good to be out of that box. 86 00:04:54,680 --> 00:04:56,240 For you, miss, 87 00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:00,520 an Imperial penny. 88 00:05:05,040 --> 00:05:08,480 I have not one but three Cybermen in my collection. 89 00:05:10,840 --> 00:05:11,920 Is that the king? 90 00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:15,680 Emperor Ludens Nimrod Kendrick, et cetera, et cetera, the 41st. 91 00:05:15,760 --> 00:05:18,600 Defender of humanity, Imperator of known space. 92 00:05:19,360 --> 00:05:20,800 He looks a bit full of himself. 93 00:05:20,880 --> 00:05:22,680 Don't say things like that about the Imperial family. 94 00:05:22,760 --> 00:05:24,200 You can end up on the run for the rest of your life. 95 00:05:24,400 --> 00:05:25,960 They don't sound very nice. 96 00:05:26,960 --> 00:05:27,960 Go on. 97 00:05:28,360 --> 00:05:29,680 If the kids want to ride the Spacey Zoomer, 98 00:05:29,760 --> 00:05:31,520 then I can operate the gravity console. 99 00:05:32,320 --> 00:05:33,320 Angie! 100 00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:43,840 Smile! Say "Spacey Zoomer". 101 00:05:44,160 --> 00:05:46,280 Whoa! 102 00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:49,440 - We're flying! - Having a good time? 103 00:05:56,720 --> 00:05:59,400 I think that was the most fun I've had in my whole life. 104 00:05:59,480 --> 00:06:02,080 It was... okay. 105 00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:07,240 Clara, I think outer space is actually very interesting. 106 00:06:07,360 --> 00:06:10,200 Right. Wonderful day out, Doctor, but time to get the kids home. 107 00:06:10,280 --> 00:06:13,120 Yeah, um, no. Not actually ready to leave. 108 00:06:13,200 --> 00:06:15,200 - Why not? - Oh, you know. 109 00:06:15,360 --> 00:06:17,040 - Reasons. - What reasons? 110 00:06:17,120 --> 00:06:18,960 Insects, funny insects. 111 00:06:19,360 --> 00:06:21,520 I should add them to my funny insect collection. 112 00:06:21,600 --> 00:06:24,040 - You collect funny insects? - Yeah, I'm starting to. 113 00:06:25,080 --> 00:06:26,320 Right now. 114 00:06:27,840 --> 00:06:30,000 How long do we have to stay here? 115 00:06:30,080 --> 00:06:31,680 Not long. Have a nap. 116 00:06:31,760 --> 00:06:33,080 I'll wake you when we're ready to leave. 117 00:06:33,160 --> 00:06:34,200 Comfy? 118 00:06:34,280 --> 00:06:36,120 - Sleep well. - Goodnight. 119 00:06:40,320 --> 00:06:41,640 Don't wander off! 120 00:06:41,960 --> 00:06:45,120 Now, I'm not just saying, "Don't wander off." I mean it. 121 00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:48,480 Otherwise, you'll wander off. And the next thing you know, 122 00:06:48,560 --> 00:06:51,840 somebody's going to have to start rescuing somebody. 123 00:06:51,920 --> 00:06:53,880 - From what? - Nothing! 124 00:06:53,960 --> 00:06:56,120 Nobody needs rescuing from anything. 125 00:06:57,280 --> 00:06:58,760 Don't wander off. 126 00:06:59,280 --> 00:07:00,640 Sweet dreams. 127 00:07:10,440 --> 00:07:12,400 Mmm. Mmm. 128 00:07:13,920 --> 00:07:16,680 Total takings for the day, one sandwich. 129 00:07:17,320 --> 00:07:20,480 Better than no sandwich, of course. Not as good as two sandwiches. 130 00:07:21,280 --> 00:07:22,720 Or even a chicken. 131 00:07:23,480 --> 00:07:26,080 That's a bit odd. That's not funny. 132 00:07:26,480 --> 00:07:28,480 Give me my hands back! 133 00:07:37,600 --> 00:07:40,320 Upgrade in progress. 134 00:07:41,680 --> 00:07:43,880 I hate the future. It's stupid. 135 00:07:43,960 --> 00:07:46,200 There's not even phone service. I'm out of here. 136 00:07:46,280 --> 00:07:47,760 The Doctor said not to wander off. 137 00:07:47,840 --> 00:07:50,840 He said that and then he wandered off. 138 00:07:50,920 --> 00:07:52,520 I don't think Clara would like that. 139 00:07:52,680 --> 00:07:53,680 She's not our mum. 140 00:07:54,240 --> 00:07:55,240 Don't leave me here. 141 00:07:59,160 --> 00:08:01,360 Was this really the biggest amusement park in the universe? 142 00:08:01,480 --> 00:08:05,240 Yeah. Hedgewick bought the planet cheap. It had been trashed in the Cyberwars. 143 00:08:05,320 --> 00:08:07,440 - Who were we fighting? - Cybermen. 144 00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:10,080 Technologically upgraded warriors. 145 00:08:10,160 --> 00:08:11,160 We couldn't win. 146 00:08:11,280 --> 00:08:13,920 Sometimes we fought to a draw but then they'd upgrade themselves, 147 00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:15,960 fix the weaknesses and destroy us. 148 00:08:16,040 --> 00:08:18,560 It's hard to fight an enemy that uses your army as its spare parts. 149 00:08:18,640 --> 00:08:21,520 You beat them, though. You beat them or you wouldn't be here. How? 150 00:08:21,920 --> 00:08:23,280 Look up there. 151 00:08:23,360 --> 00:08:24,920 That corner of sky, what do you see? 152 00:08:25,080 --> 00:08:27,560 Nothing. It's just black. 153 00:08:28,360 --> 00:08:30,000 No stars, no nothing. 154 00:08:30,080 --> 00:08:32,560 Well, it used to be the Tiberian Spiral Galaxy. 155 00:08:32,640 --> 00:08:34,080 A million star systems, 156 00:08:34,160 --> 00:08:36,960 a hundred million worlds, a billion trillion people. 157 00:08:37,720 --> 00:08:41,160 It's not there any more. No more Tiberian Galaxy. 158 00:08:41,240 --> 00:08:43,160 No more Cybermen. 159 00:08:44,080 --> 00:08:45,320 It was effective. 160 00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:47,160 - It's horrible. - Yeah. 161 00:08:48,320 --> 00:08:51,640 - I feel like a monster sometimes. - Why? 162 00:08:51,720 --> 00:08:54,840 Because instead of mourning a billion trillion dead people, 163 00:08:54,920 --> 00:08:56,400 I just feel sorry for the poor blighter 164 00:08:56,480 --> 00:08:58,160 who had to press the button and blow it all up. 165 00:08:58,320 --> 00:09:01,960 Clara, did you tell Angie she could go to the barracks? 166 00:09:02,080 --> 00:09:03,920 You know I didn't. 167 00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:07,080 - She hasn't. - She's just gone in there. 168 00:09:07,160 --> 00:09:08,160 Come on. 169 00:09:10,120 --> 00:09:12,160 I can't fix this. 170 00:09:12,240 --> 00:09:15,440 It can't be broken. It's a solid state sub-ether ansible-class communicator. 171 00:09:15,520 --> 00:09:17,080 Just run the diagnostics. 172 00:09:17,160 --> 00:09:18,720 There's nothing left to diagnose. 173 00:09:18,800 --> 00:09:20,760 It's not broken, it's empty. 174 00:09:20,840 --> 00:09:22,240 All the components have gone. 175 00:09:22,320 --> 00:09:24,080 Well, you must have replacement parts. 176 00:09:24,160 --> 00:09:25,880 Not enough to build a new one! 177 00:09:25,960 --> 00:09:27,960 Captain, the weather controller is malfunctioning again. 178 00:09:28,040 --> 00:09:30,480 There's storms, heatwaves, snow. 179 00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:34,000 Hello? I'm bored. 180 00:09:34,560 --> 00:09:35,920 Where's your big sister? 181 00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:38,240 Clara? She's not my sister. 182 00:09:38,320 --> 00:09:41,080 She's stupid. She's talking to Porridge. 183 00:09:41,640 --> 00:09:43,080 She talks to her porridge? 184 00:09:43,160 --> 00:09:45,280 Porridge, that little bloke. 185 00:09:47,960 --> 00:09:49,720 We need to have a chat. 186 00:09:55,280 --> 00:09:58,120 I'm not scared, if you're wondering. 187 00:09:58,880 --> 00:10:02,520 I just think I ought to turn the lights back on. 188 00:10:37,520 --> 00:10:39,560 So, tell me about the little bloke. 189 00:10:39,640 --> 00:10:40,880 Well, you must have seen him. 190 00:10:40,960 --> 00:10:41,960 Angie! 191 00:10:42,040 --> 00:10:44,400 She always has to turn up and spoil everything. 192 00:10:44,480 --> 00:10:45,600 I wasn't doing anything! 193 00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:47,800 Why can't you just leave me alone? 194 00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:53,800 - Cyberman! - Angie! 195 00:10:55,880 --> 00:10:56,880 Attack formation! 196 00:10:58,880 --> 00:10:59,960 No! 197 00:11:01,960 --> 00:11:03,800 Attack formation, quickly! 198 00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:10,680 Upgrade in progress. 199 00:11:11,160 --> 00:11:12,160 Angie! 200 00:11:25,320 --> 00:11:27,400 - Angie! - Clara, Clara! 201 00:11:27,480 --> 00:11:29,640 That was a Cyberman. But they're extinct! 202 00:11:29,720 --> 00:11:30,840 Listen to me, I will get her back. 203 00:11:30,920 --> 00:11:32,640 Captain, a word, please. 204 00:11:33,200 --> 00:11:35,680 Now, correct me if I'm wrong, 205 00:11:35,760 --> 00:11:38,080 but I take it your platoon doesn't do much fighting. 206 00:11:38,440 --> 00:11:40,280 - What do you expect? - What? 207 00:11:40,360 --> 00:11:42,040 We're a punishment platoon. 208 00:11:42,120 --> 00:11:45,160 That's why they sent us out here, so we can't get into trouble. 209 00:11:46,960 --> 00:11:48,400 Right, right, well, okay. 210 00:11:48,480 --> 00:11:51,600 As Imperial consul, I'm putting Clara in charge. 211 00:11:51,680 --> 00:11:53,560 Clara, stay alive until I get back. 212 00:11:53,640 --> 00:11:55,920 And don't let anyone blow up this planet. 213 00:11:56,680 --> 00:11:58,680 Is that something they're likely to do? 214 00:11:58,760 --> 00:11:59,800 Get to somewhere defensible. 215 00:11:59,880 --> 00:12:01,760 - Where are you going? - I'm getting Angie, 216 00:12:01,840 --> 00:12:04,320 finding Artie and looking for funny insects. 217 00:12:04,400 --> 00:12:05,520 Stay alive. 218 00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:09,160 And you lot, no blowing up this planet! 219 00:12:14,440 --> 00:12:16,440 Put me down! I hate you! 220 00:12:18,840 --> 00:12:21,400 Artie? Artie, what's happening? 221 00:12:23,840 --> 00:12:25,880 Please stand by. 222 00:12:26,320 --> 00:12:28,160 You will be upgraded. 223 00:12:33,560 --> 00:12:36,880 Cyberiad-class weaponry. I've taken it out of storage. 224 00:12:36,960 --> 00:12:40,440 Good. We need to find somewhere defensible, where? 225 00:12:41,560 --> 00:12:42,560 The Beach. 226 00:12:43,080 --> 00:12:44,080 Giant's Cauldron. 227 00:12:44,440 --> 00:12:46,400 Natty Longshoe's Comical Castle. 228 00:12:46,480 --> 00:12:49,920 - Real castle? Drawbridge? Moat? - Yes, but comical. 229 00:12:50,680 --> 00:12:51,680 We'll go there. 230 00:12:51,840 --> 00:12:54,800 Ma'am, my platoon can deal with one Cyberman 231 00:12:55,080 --> 00:12:57,960 and there are protocols if we cannot immediately find and destroy it. 232 00:12:58,040 --> 00:13:00,320 - Blowing up the planet protocols? - Respectfully, ma'am... 233 00:13:00,400 --> 00:13:02,320 Somewhere defensible. No blowing up the planet. 234 00:13:03,920 --> 00:13:06,600 She's your commanding officer now, isn't she, Captain? 235 00:13:10,400 --> 00:13:12,120 Yes. 236 00:13:13,160 --> 00:13:14,160 Sir. 237 00:13:17,880 --> 00:13:20,440 - You really saw a Cyberman? - We really did. 238 00:13:20,640 --> 00:13:22,280 Have you reported it to the Imperium? 239 00:13:22,480 --> 00:13:25,680 - No communicators. - So you're going to do what she says? 240 00:13:25,880 --> 00:13:28,960 Right, let's all spend the night at Natty Longshoe's Comical Castle. 241 00:13:31,200 --> 00:13:32,360 Artie! 242 00:13:40,040 --> 00:13:41,680 Firstly, 243 00:13:41,880 --> 00:13:45,280 if anybody's watching this, those children are under my protection, 244 00:13:45,360 --> 00:13:47,680 I'm coming to get them. 245 00:13:47,760 --> 00:13:51,480 And secondly, little metal machine, 246 00:13:52,080 --> 00:13:54,080 you are beautiful. 247 00:14:03,520 --> 00:14:06,800 Not even a Cybermat any more, eh? 248 00:14:06,880 --> 00:14:08,160 Cybermites. 249 00:14:15,280 --> 00:14:19,040 Now, there's a local transmat link open to your home, 250 00:14:19,120 --> 00:14:21,800 if I can just find the frequency. 251 00:14:24,960 --> 00:14:26,320 Hey, that really shouldn't have worked. 252 00:14:26,400 --> 00:14:27,880 Doctor, help her. 253 00:14:27,960 --> 00:14:29,640 Angie! Artie! 254 00:14:34,920 --> 00:14:36,040 Webley? 255 00:14:36,200 --> 00:14:39,400 We needed children but the children had stopped coming. 256 00:14:39,480 --> 00:14:41,000 You brought us children. 257 00:14:41,360 --> 00:14:45,360 Hail to you, the Doctor. Saviour of the Cybermen! 258 00:14:47,240 --> 00:14:49,440 What would the Empire do if they were alerted? 259 00:14:49,520 --> 00:14:51,800 I told you, they'd tell me to blow up the planet. 260 00:14:51,880 --> 00:14:53,800 After they got us off. 261 00:14:53,880 --> 00:14:56,880 - Captain, you want to take that one? - No, ma'am, just blow the sucker up. 262 00:14:57,720 --> 00:14:59,360 Drawbridge, moat, brilliant. 263 00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:01,120 With respect, ma'am, 264 00:15:01,200 --> 00:15:02,480 we ought to be hunting the creature. 265 00:15:02,600 --> 00:15:05,400 The only reason I'm still alive is because I do what the Doctor says. 266 00:15:05,520 --> 00:15:08,960 Can you guarantee me you'd bring me back my children alive and unharmed? 267 00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:12,800 - I trust the Doctor. - You think he knows what he's doing? 268 00:15:12,880 --> 00:15:14,960 I'm not sure I'd go that far. 269 00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:20,040 As the battle raged between humanity and the Cyberiad, 270 00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:22,280 the Cyberplanners built a Valkyrie 271 00:15:22,360 --> 00:15:25,240 to save critically damaged units and bring them here 272 00:15:25,320 --> 00:15:28,360 and, one by one, repair them. 273 00:15:28,440 --> 00:15:30,840 The people who vanished from the amusement park, 274 00:15:30,920 --> 00:15:34,440 they were spare parts for repairs? 275 00:15:34,520 --> 00:15:36,240 We've upgraded ourselves. 276 00:15:36,320 --> 00:15:38,360 The next model will be undefeatable. 277 00:15:38,440 --> 00:15:40,360 Nothing's undefeatable. 278 00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:44,080 We needed children to build a new Cyberplanet. 279 00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:49,480 A child's brain, with its infinite potential, is perfect for our needs. 280 00:15:49,560 --> 00:15:50,960 But we no longer need the children. 281 00:15:51,040 --> 00:15:54,480 The Cybermites have been scanning your brain, Doctor. 282 00:15:55,000 --> 00:15:58,080 - It's quite remarkable. - Also completely useless to you. 283 00:15:58,320 --> 00:16:00,560 Cybermen use human parts. 284 00:16:00,640 --> 00:16:03,640 I'm not human. 285 00:16:03,720 --> 00:16:05,920 You can't convert non-humans. 286 00:16:06,040 --> 00:16:09,720 Well, that was true a long time ago but we've upgraded ourselves. 287 00:16:09,800 --> 00:16:13,640 Current Cyberunits use almost any living components. 288 00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:27,000 Ahh! 289 00:16:28,880 --> 00:16:31,120 Incorporated, yes. 290 00:16:31,280 --> 00:16:34,680 Ahh, unfamiliar pulmonary setup. 291 00:16:34,760 --> 00:16:36,440 Nervous system hyperconductive. 292 00:16:36,760 --> 00:16:39,240 Remarkable brain processing speed. 293 00:16:43,160 --> 00:16:44,640 Amazing. 294 00:16:46,160 --> 00:16:47,520 Get out of my head! 295 00:16:47,680 --> 00:16:49,880 Stop rummaging in my mind! 296 00:16:49,960 --> 00:16:51,960 Just you try and stop me. 297 00:16:52,200 --> 00:16:53,200 Ooh... 298 00:16:54,160 --> 00:16:56,640 Who's Clara? Why are you thinking about her so much? 299 00:16:56,720 --> 00:16:57,720 Enough. 300 00:16:58,280 --> 00:17:01,880 Fascinating, a complete mental block. Highly effective. 301 00:17:01,960 --> 00:17:04,520 Ugh! Relax, relax. 302 00:17:04,600 --> 00:17:08,520 If you just relax, you will find this a perfectly pleasant experience. 303 00:17:08,600 --> 00:17:10,720 You are being upgraded and incorporated 304 00:17:10,800 --> 00:17:12,840 into the Cyberiad as a Cyberplanner. 305 00:17:14,240 --> 00:17:15,640 Get out of my head! 306 00:17:16,320 --> 00:17:17,760 What is this place? A network? 307 00:17:17,840 --> 00:17:21,240 A hive? You're getting signals from every Cyberman everywhere. 308 00:17:21,560 --> 00:17:22,640 And there you are, there. 309 00:17:24,960 --> 00:17:25,960 Oh... 310 00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:29,400 This is brilliant! 311 00:17:29,480 --> 00:17:31,440 I'm so clever already 312 00:17:31,520 --> 00:17:35,160 and now I'm a million times more clever and what a brain! 313 00:17:35,240 --> 00:17:39,520 Not a human brain, not even slightly human. 314 00:17:39,760 --> 00:17:42,040 I mean, I'm going to have to completely rework the neural interface 315 00:17:42,120 --> 00:17:47,600 but this is going to be the most efficient 316 00:17:47,960 --> 00:17:49,760 Cyberplanner! 317 00:17:50,080 --> 00:17:53,360 Not a great name, that, is it? I could call myself... 318 00:17:53,440 --> 00:17:55,800 Mr Clever. 319 00:17:56,080 --> 00:17:59,400 So much raw data. Time Lords. 320 00:17:59,480 --> 00:18:03,640 There's information on the Time Lords in here. 321 00:18:03,720 --> 00:18:07,200 Oh, this is just dreamy. 322 00:18:08,200 --> 00:18:09,600 Right. 323 00:18:09,680 --> 00:18:12,800 I'm allowing you access to memories on Time Lord regeneration. 324 00:18:17,640 --> 00:18:19,680 Fantastic! 325 00:18:19,920 --> 00:18:22,680 I could regenerate now. Big blast of regeneration energy, 326 00:18:22,760 --> 00:18:25,400 burn out any little Cyber-widgets in my brain. 327 00:18:25,840 --> 00:18:27,760 Along with everything you're connected to. Don't want to. 328 00:18:27,840 --> 00:18:30,440 Use this me up, eh, who knows what we'll get next? 329 00:18:30,680 --> 00:18:31,680 But I can. 330 00:18:34,240 --> 00:18:36,120 Stalemate, then. 331 00:18:36,440 --> 00:18:38,760 One of us needs to control this head. 332 00:18:38,840 --> 00:18:41,200 We're too well-balanced. 333 00:18:41,840 --> 00:18:45,360 What did you say? No, no, no, no. I heard you. 334 00:18:45,760 --> 00:18:48,240 Rhetorical device to keep me thinking about it a bit more. 335 00:18:48,320 --> 00:18:49,320 Stalemate. 336 00:18:50,080 --> 00:18:53,200 We each control 49.881 % of this brain. 337 00:18:53,280 --> 00:18:56,080 0.238 of the brain is still in the balance. 338 00:18:56,160 --> 00:18:57,880 Whoever gets this gets the whole thing. 339 00:18:57,960 --> 00:18:58,960 Do you play chess? 340 00:18:59,280 --> 00:19:01,160 The rules of chess are in my memory banks. 341 00:19:01,240 --> 00:19:03,280 You're proposing we play chess to end the stalemate? 342 00:19:03,360 --> 00:19:04,360 Winner takes all. 343 00:19:04,440 --> 00:19:07,000 Nobody can access that portion of the brain without winning the game. 344 00:19:11,720 --> 00:19:13,600 You can't win! 345 00:19:14,480 --> 00:19:15,560 Try me. 346 00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:18,800 You understand, when I do win 347 00:19:18,880 --> 00:19:23,240 the Cyberiad gets your brains and memories? 348 00:19:23,320 --> 00:19:24,480 All of it. 349 00:19:24,960 --> 00:19:28,760 Yeah, when I win, you get out of my head, 350 00:19:28,840 --> 00:19:32,720 you let the children go and nobody dies. 351 00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:34,440 You got that? 352 00:19:35,160 --> 00:19:37,320 Nobody dies! 353 00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:45,640 Castle clear. Missy, confirm status. 354 00:19:45,960 --> 00:19:47,600 All clear in the power station. 355 00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:54,400 It's Missy. 356 00:19:55,680 --> 00:19:57,240 Something's out there. 357 00:19:57,320 --> 00:19:59,360 What do you mean? Did you see the Cyberman? 358 00:19:59,440 --> 00:20:01,800 I don't know, I couldn't see it. It was only for a moment. 359 00:20:02,600 --> 00:20:06,000 Can I hide? Is it okay if I hide? 360 00:20:07,720 --> 00:20:09,560 Don't move! I'm in the army! 361 00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:14,960 Oh, God. 362 00:20:35,160 --> 00:20:38,960 Uh, ma'am, Missy said she saw something and then she went quiet. 363 00:20:39,040 --> 00:20:41,720 It's on its way, then. Weapons. Show me. 364 00:20:42,760 --> 00:20:43,920 Only one gun? 365 00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:46,400 Cybermen have been extinct for a thousand years. 366 00:20:46,600 --> 00:20:49,080 Even one anti-Cyber gun is a miracle. 367 00:20:49,280 --> 00:20:52,720 These things are hand pulsers. Touch the back of a Cyberman's head, 368 00:20:52,800 --> 00:20:55,080 the electromagnetic pulse deactivates it. 369 00:20:56,280 --> 00:20:59,800 And what's this for? Just a mad guess here. It blows up the planet? 370 00:21:00,280 --> 00:21:02,880 Implodes it. There's also a trigger unit. 371 00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:04,080 I'll have that, then. 372 00:21:04,160 --> 00:21:05,400 Is there any other way to activate the bomb? 373 00:21:05,480 --> 00:21:08,880 It's set to respond to my voice. I have the verbal code. 374 00:21:08,960 --> 00:21:12,160 You will not activate it without a direct order from me. 375 00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:17,880 I will follow my orders. 376 00:21:17,960 --> 00:21:22,000 Your orders come from me, don't they? 377 00:21:24,800 --> 00:21:27,000 You'll need to sign for that trigger unit, ma'am. 378 00:21:27,080 --> 00:21:28,080 Thanks. 379 00:21:28,280 --> 00:21:30,840 Mind if I take one of these? Might be handy. 380 00:21:32,880 --> 00:21:35,960 Help yourself. I'll teach you how to use it, upstairs. 381 00:21:36,040 --> 00:21:37,520 Now. 382 00:21:40,760 --> 00:21:42,800 There, that was easy. 383 00:21:44,000 --> 00:21:46,640 The game has just started. 384 00:21:47,320 --> 00:21:52,400 Doctor, why is there no record of you anywhere in the data banks 385 00:21:52,520 --> 00:21:53,520 of the Cyberiad? 386 00:21:53,640 --> 00:21:56,720 Oh. You're good. 387 00:21:57,960 --> 00:22:01,800 Oh, you've been eliminating yourself from history. 388 00:22:02,920 --> 00:22:05,600 You know, you could be reconstructed by the hole you've left. 389 00:22:09,320 --> 00:22:11,840 Good point. I'll do something about that. 390 00:22:12,120 --> 00:22:14,480 The rules of chess allow only a finite number of moves. 391 00:22:14,560 --> 00:22:16,920 And I can use other Cyberunits as remote processors. 392 00:22:17,000 --> 00:22:19,000 You cannot possibly win! 393 00:22:19,240 --> 00:22:23,320 I can. I know things you don't. For example, did you know 394 00:22:23,440 --> 00:22:25,720 very early versions of the Cyber operating system 395 00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:30,320 could be seriously scrambled by exposure to things like gold or cleaning fluid? 396 00:22:30,400 --> 00:22:35,560 And what's interesting is you're still running some of that code. 397 00:22:35,640 --> 00:22:37,320 Really? 398 00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:40,120 That's your secret weapon? 399 00:22:41,680 --> 00:22:43,400 Cleaning fluid? 400 00:22:44,640 --> 00:22:45,840 Nope, gold! 401 00:22:47,000 --> 00:22:50,040 Oh! Like a charm. 402 00:22:50,120 --> 00:22:55,560 Right, you, Cyber-Webley, and you, kid things, I'll bring the chess board, 403 00:22:55,680 --> 00:22:57,560 let's get out of here. 404 00:23:00,560 --> 00:23:02,440 You knew it was me. 405 00:23:03,640 --> 00:23:05,560 I was in the Imperial Guard on Caspartine. 406 00:23:05,640 --> 00:23:09,360 Mostly just parades but I had the honour to guard the old Emperor. 407 00:23:09,480 --> 00:23:10,480 During the ice picnic. 408 00:23:10,880 --> 00:23:13,920 When the snow bears came and danced for us. That was a day. 409 00:23:14,000 --> 00:23:17,560 We're a punishment platoon. We can't beat a Cyberman. 410 00:23:17,720 --> 00:23:19,320 The Imperium has to know what's happening. 411 00:23:19,400 --> 00:23:21,080 Like you said, the communicators are out. 412 00:23:21,160 --> 00:23:23,920 The only way you can report this now is to activate the bomb. 413 00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:26,440 - Yes! - And I forbid you to do that. 414 00:23:26,520 --> 00:23:27,880 I don't get it. 415 00:23:27,960 --> 00:23:29,640 Why would you blow up a whole planet and everybody on it 416 00:23:29,720 --> 00:23:32,240 just to get rid of one Cyberman? 417 00:23:32,320 --> 00:23:34,800 We tried other ways but they only worked sometimes. 418 00:23:34,880 --> 00:23:37,720 So now we take drastic action. And it works. 419 00:23:37,880 --> 00:23:41,640 If you find a Cyberman and you can't destroy it immediately, 420 00:23:41,720 --> 00:23:43,920 you implode the planet. 421 00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:46,320 I was sent here because I didn't follow orders. 422 00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:48,720 I can make up for that. 423 00:23:51,800 --> 00:23:53,000 Put it down, I forbid you! 424 00:23:53,080 --> 00:23:54,800 Yeah! What she said. 425 00:23:54,880 --> 00:23:57,200 You ran away. I will do what I was brought up to do. 426 00:23:57,280 --> 00:24:00,480 Live for the Empire, fight for the Empire, die for the Empire! 427 00:24:00,800 --> 00:24:07,080 This is Captain Alice Ferry, Imperial ID 1 -9-Delta-1 -3-B. Activate... 428 00:24:07,160 --> 00:24:08,320 Cyberman, get down! 429 00:24:20,280 --> 00:24:22,400 The Doctor said to get somewhere easily defensible. 430 00:24:22,480 --> 00:24:24,720 But if we just stay in the castle, he'll pick us off one by one. 431 00:24:24,800 --> 00:24:25,800 We have to take it out! 432 00:24:26,080 --> 00:24:27,560 Is that an order, ma'am? 433 00:24:32,040 --> 00:24:33,640 - Yes. - Good. 434 00:24:34,840 --> 00:24:35,920 You know what to do. 435 00:24:36,000 --> 00:24:39,400 Pulse to the back of the head, fry the brain circuit interface. 436 00:24:39,640 --> 00:24:41,640 It's going to be hard to get in close enough. 437 00:25:18,160 --> 00:25:21,320 I've heard about the Cybermen since I was in my cradle. 438 00:25:21,680 --> 00:25:23,480 I'm not afraid of you! 439 00:25:24,400 --> 00:25:25,400 Now! 440 00:25:32,520 --> 00:25:33,520 Hold it right there! 441 00:25:33,800 --> 00:25:34,800 What's happening to them? 442 00:25:39,400 --> 00:25:41,160 One more step and I fire! 443 00:25:41,240 --> 00:25:42,920 Don't fire that. 444 00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:48,160 A pulse will deactivate them. And anyway, it's a waste of charge. 445 00:25:48,240 --> 00:25:49,240 We may need it again. 446 00:25:49,400 --> 00:25:51,560 You don't think that was the only one, then? 447 00:25:58,680 --> 00:26:02,120 Ah! Don't shoot, don't shoot! I'm nice. Please, don't shoot. 448 00:26:02,200 --> 00:26:04,760 Hey, Clara, you haven't let them blow up the planet. Good job. 449 00:26:04,840 --> 00:26:07,320 Did you get the kids? Are they all right? What's going on? 450 00:26:07,400 --> 00:26:10,920 Um, bit of a good news, bad news, good news again thing going on. 451 00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:13,320 So, good news, I kidnapped the Cyberplanner 452 00:26:13,400 --> 00:26:15,280 and right now I'm sort of in control of this Cyberman. 453 00:26:15,360 --> 00:26:16,360 Bad news? 454 00:26:16,440 --> 00:26:18,160 Bad news, the Cyberplanner is in my head 455 00:26:18,240 --> 00:26:22,800 and different bad news, the kids are... 456 00:26:23,120 --> 00:26:25,120 Well, it's complicated. 457 00:26:25,240 --> 00:26:26,800 Complicated how? 458 00:26:26,880 --> 00:26:29,640 Complicated as in walking coma. 459 00:26:31,920 --> 00:26:32,920 Oh! 460 00:26:35,680 --> 00:26:38,000 - Please tell me you can wake them up. - Hope so! 461 00:26:38,520 --> 00:26:40,520 - Other good news? - Well, in other good news, 462 00:26:40,600 --> 00:26:43,000 there are a few more repaired and reactivated Cybermen on the way 463 00:26:43,080 --> 00:26:45,720 and the Cyberplanner's installing a patch for the gold thing. 464 00:26:45,800 --> 00:26:48,920 No, wait, that isn't good news, is it? Um... 465 00:26:49,000 --> 00:26:53,440 So, good news, I have a very good chance of winning my chess match! 466 00:26:53,560 --> 00:26:55,040 - What? - I'll explain later. 467 00:26:55,120 --> 00:26:59,440 In a bit of a hurry. Get me to a table! And somebody tie me up! 468 00:26:59,520 --> 00:27:00,920 Need hands free for chess. 469 00:27:02,800 --> 00:27:06,000 But immobilise me. Quickly. 470 00:27:07,040 --> 00:27:09,880 Right, that's good. I won't be able to move but hands free, good. 471 00:27:10,240 --> 00:27:13,240 - You're playing chess with yourself? - And winning. 472 00:27:14,360 --> 00:27:17,880 Actually, he has no better than a 25% chance of winning 473 00:27:17,960 --> 00:27:21,480 at this stage in the game. Some very dodgy moves at the beginning. 474 00:27:21,560 --> 00:27:25,480 Hello, flesh girl. Fantastic! I'm the Cyberplanner. 475 00:27:25,800 --> 00:27:28,400 - Doctor? - Afraid not. I'm working the mouth now. 476 00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:31,680 Allons-y! Oh, you should see the state of these neurons. 477 00:27:31,760 --> 00:27:34,000 He's had some cowboys in here. Ten complete rejigs. 478 00:27:34,080 --> 00:27:35,120 You aren't the Doctor. 479 00:27:35,200 --> 00:27:40,720 No, but I know who you are. You're the impossible girl. 480 00:27:40,800 --> 00:27:44,040 Oh, he's very interested in you. 481 00:27:44,240 --> 00:27:47,440 - Why am I impossible? - Hasn't he told you, the sly devil? 482 00:27:47,600 --> 00:27:49,200 Dear me. Listen. Soon we wake. 483 00:27:49,280 --> 00:27:52,600 We'll strip you down for spare parts, then build a spaceship and move on. 484 00:27:52,680 --> 00:27:53,720 More Cybermen? 485 00:27:53,800 --> 00:27:55,600 They're waking from their tomb right now. 486 00:27:55,680 --> 00:27:57,960 You can either die or live on as one of us. 487 00:27:58,080 --> 00:27:59,080 The Doctor will stop you. 488 00:27:59,160 --> 00:28:01,480 He can't even access the lips. 489 00:28:02,200 --> 00:28:04,240 Ow! 490 00:28:04,440 --> 00:28:06,560 Ow! Oh, that hurt. 491 00:28:06,760 --> 00:28:10,560 No, stop, enough, bit of pain, neural surge, just what I needed. Thank you. 492 00:28:10,640 --> 00:28:12,880 - Why am I the impossible girl? - It's just a thing in my head, 493 00:28:12,960 --> 00:28:15,280 - I'll explain later. - Chess game. Stakes? 494 00:28:15,360 --> 00:28:17,880 If he wins, I give up my mind and he gets access to all my memories 495 00:28:17,960 --> 00:28:19,200 along with knowledge of time travel, 496 00:28:19,280 --> 00:28:22,200 but if I win, he'll break his promises to get out of my head 497 00:28:22,280 --> 00:28:23,800 and then kill us all anyway. 498 00:28:23,880 --> 00:28:25,600 - That's not reassuring! - No. 499 00:28:25,680 --> 00:28:27,280 Please tell me you can fix whatever happened to the children. 500 00:28:27,680 --> 00:28:29,200 Children. Yeah, they're fine. 501 00:28:29,280 --> 00:28:31,400 I mean, right now their brains are just in standby mode. 502 00:28:31,480 --> 00:28:33,120 - That is not fine! - Listen. 503 00:28:33,200 --> 00:28:35,800 Right now, they have a much better chance 504 00:28:35,880 --> 00:28:38,560 of getting out of this situation alive than you do. 505 00:28:39,280 --> 00:28:41,280 Which one of you said that? 506 00:28:41,920 --> 00:28:47,160 Me, Cyberplanner. Mr Clever. Now, if you don't mind, 507 00:28:47,360 --> 00:28:53,040 I have a chess game to finish. And you have to die, pointlessly 508 00:28:53,360 --> 00:28:56,280 and very far from home. 509 00:28:58,080 --> 00:28:59,280 Toodle-oo. 510 00:29:03,880 --> 00:29:05,880 Apparently, there are more Cybermen on the way. 511 00:29:05,960 --> 00:29:09,560 There's at least a dozen more shots left in the gun before it needs to recharge. 512 00:29:09,760 --> 00:29:11,400 We might have more than a dozen Cybermen to worry about. 513 00:29:11,480 --> 00:29:14,360 - What's that cable? - Power line for the park. 514 00:29:14,560 --> 00:29:15,640 What would happen if we unhooked the end, 515 00:29:15,720 --> 00:29:17,000 dropped it into the moat and turned it on? 516 00:29:17,080 --> 00:29:19,080 Fry anything alive that entered the water. 517 00:29:19,160 --> 00:29:21,280 - Can Cybermen fly? - No, ma'am. 518 00:29:21,720 --> 00:29:23,560 First good news of the day. Do it! 519 00:29:39,800 --> 00:29:42,880 Stop that. I felt that. 520 00:29:43,080 --> 00:29:46,040 Of course you did. It's time to get up. 521 00:29:47,440 --> 00:29:50,600 Wakey-wakey, boys and girls. 522 00:29:51,760 --> 00:29:54,400 Wakey-wakey. 523 00:30:21,880 --> 00:30:25,320 - There. Get that in you. Warm you up. - Oh, thank you, Porridge. 524 00:30:26,680 --> 00:30:28,480 Hey, Clara! 525 00:30:28,560 --> 00:30:29,800 I'll see what he wants. 526 00:30:29,880 --> 00:30:31,720 - Call me if there's any change. - Right. 527 00:30:39,240 --> 00:30:43,080 Hey! Clara, there you are. Now, quick rundown. 528 00:30:43,240 --> 00:30:44,240 What's our weapon strength? 529 00:30:44,360 --> 00:30:46,440 One big gun, five of those hand pulser units 530 00:30:46,520 --> 00:30:48,560 and a shiny black bomb that implodes the planet. 531 00:30:48,640 --> 00:30:50,400 Yeah, yeah. That one. Now, tell me. 532 00:30:50,480 --> 00:30:53,000 Does it happen possibly to have a sort of remote triggery thing? 533 00:30:53,400 --> 00:30:54,760 - Brilliant. Pass it here. - No. 534 00:30:54,840 --> 00:30:56,080 - Why not? - In case you're not you right now. 535 00:30:56,160 --> 00:30:59,640 - Or even if you are, just in case. - Oh, don't worry. 536 00:30:59,720 --> 00:31:02,840 The Cyberplanner's hibernating between moves right now. 537 00:31:03,280 --> 00:31:04,280 Shh. 538 00:31:05,240 --> 00:31:06,360 Prove you're you. 539 00:31:06,680 --> 00:31:09,240 Tell me something only the Doctor knows. 540 00:31:11,560 --> 00:31:12,560 Clara... 541 00:31:14,440 --> 00:31:15,440 I suppose 542 00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:20,960 I'm the only one who knows how I feel about you right now. 543 00:31:22,360 --> 00:31:24,760 How funny you are. So funny. 544 00:31:26,520 --> 00:31:28,200 And pretty. 545 00:31:28,680 --> 00:31:33,640 And the truth is I'm starting to like you in a way that is more than just... 546 00:31:34,600 --> 00:31:37,120 Ow! Ow! Ow! 547 00:31:37,200 --> 00:31:41,440 Yes. Ah, it's me. That really hurt. How did you know that was him? 548 00:31:41,520 --> 00:31:44,080 Because even if that was true, which it is obviously not, 549 00:31:44,200 --> 00:31:46,640 I know you well enough to know that you would rather die than say it. 550 00:31:46,720 --> 00:31:48,400 Finish your stupid game! 551 00:31:49,480 --> 00:31:51,000 - Doctor, let go. - I can't. 552 00:31:51,080 --> 00:31:53,240 He's got control of the left arm. 553 00:32:02,640 --> 00:32:04,840 - Doctor? - He got what he wanted. 554 00:32:05,160 --> 00:32:07,600 He destroyed the trigger. My move. 555 00:32:07,720 --> 00:32:09,360 What do you mean, he got what he wanted? 556 00:32:09,680 --> 00:32:15,520 He means good news, boys and girls. 557 00:32:15,800 --> 00:32:18,960 They're here! 558 00:32:38,160 --> 00:32:39,760 One gun, five hand pulsers 559 00:32:39,840 --> 00:32:41,640 and a planet-squashing bomb that doesn't work any more. 560 00:32:41,720 --> 00:32:43,680 - Why not? - Broken trigger unit. 561 00:32:43,880 --> 00:32:44,880 But you signed for that. 562 00:32:45,600 --> 00:32:48,960 I have learnt so much from you, Doctor. 563 00:32:49,360 --> 00:32:53,280 It's been an education. But now, 564 00:32:53,680 --> 00:32:55,800 it's time for the endgame. 565 00:33:09,760 --> 00:33:10,880 Brilliant. 566 00:33:13,360 --> 00:33:15,400 Upgrade in progress. 567 00:33:17,400 --> 00:33:18,400 Ah. 568 00:33:19,960 --> 00:33:21,360 - Who's our best shot? - Probably it's me. 569 00:33:23,280 --> 00:33:24,560 Shoot any of them who make it across. 570 00:33:24,640 --> 00:33:26,080 The rest of you, take defensive positions. 571 00:33:26,160 --> 00:33:27,520 - Porridge? - Yes? 572 00:33:27,800 --> 00:33:28,800 Keep yourself safe. 573 00:33:44,720 --> 00:33:48,680 Alice Ferry, you should have destroyed this planet when you had the chance. 574 00:33:49,520 --> 00:33:55,480 They're nearly here. Now, you can take my bishop and keep limping on 575 00:33:55,760 --> 00:34:00,760 for a little longer, or you can sacrifice your queen 576 00:34:00,840 --> 00:34:03,280 and get the children back. 577 00:34:03,400 --> 00:34:07,200 But it's mate in five moves. And I get your mind. 578 00:34:07,840 --> 00:34:08,840 Go! 579 00:34:17,200 --> 00:34:21,520 Take my queen and give me back the children. 580 00:34:23,720 --> 00:34:27,000 Emotions! Can't you see what a foolish move that was? 581 00:34:27,080 --> 00:34:28,960 You've lost the game! 582 00:34:29,160 --> 00:34:32,360 Kids! Back! Now! 583 00:34:42,440 --> 00:34:45,640 Emotions, Doctor. 584 00:34:45,840 --> 00:34:50,840 All for two human children you barely know. 585 00:34:50,920 --> 00:34:53,400 And it was a pointless sacrifice, anyway. 586 00:34:56,160 --> 00:34:58,320 So, Doctor, 587 00:34:59,440 --> 00:35:03,320 do you think the children's death will affect your relationship 588 00:35:03,400 --> 00:35:05,000 with Miss Clara? 589 00:35:08,760 --> 00:35:12,160 Welcome to Webley's World of Wonders, children. 590 00:35:12,320 --> 00:35:14,600 Now presenting Delights, 591 00:35:14,680 --> 00:35:17,840 Delicacies and Death. 592 00:35:18,040 --> 00:35:19,040 Doctor! 593 00:35:24,320 --> 00:35:27,880 Angie, are you okay? Just look after Artie, okay? 594 00:35:38,560 --> 00:35:40,960 Upgrade in progress. 595 00:35:41,360 --> 00:35:44,800 Your move. But before you take it, just so you know, sacrificing my queen 596 00:35:44,880 --> 00:35:46,840 was the best possible move I could have made. 597 00:35:46,920 --> 00:35:51,680 The Time Lords invented chess. It's our game and if you don't avoid my trap, 598 00:35:51,960 --> 00:35:54,120 it gives me mate in three moves. 599 00:35:54,200 --> 00:35:55,240 How? 600 00:35:56,720 --> 00:35:58,560 I've got no charge left! 601 00:36:03,200 --> 00:36:04,320 How? 602 00:36:08,440 --> 00:36:10,920 Come on. Call yourself a chess-playing robot? 603 00:36:11,080 --> 00:36:12,520 How? 604 00:36:16,000 --> 00:36:18,160 Hey, you figure it out. 605 00:36:22,400 --> 00:36:25,920 Or don't you have the processing power? Hmm? 606 00:36:26,600 --> 00:36:30,520 Please standby. You will be upgraded. 607 00:36:30,600 --> 00:36:34,080 - Welcome to the Cyberiad. - Upgraded. 608 00:36:34,160 --> 00:36:37,920 - You will be upgraded. - Welcome to the Cyberiad. 609 00:36:38,000 --> 00:36:41,840 You will be upgraded. 610 00:36:48,160 --> 00:36:50,040 What are you doing? 611 00:36:50,120 --> 00:36:55,720 Doctor. Doctor. Doctor, Doctor, Doctor, Doctor, Doctor. 612 00:36:55,800 --> 00:36:57,320 I'm pulling in extra processing power. 613 00:36:57,480 --> 00:37:00,320 Three million Cyberbrains working on one tiny chess problem. 614 00:37:00,400 --> 00:37:02,680 How long do you think it's going to take us to solve it? 615 00:37:02,920 --> 00:37:04,000 That's cheating. 616 00:37:04,120 --> 00:37:07,600 No, no, no, no. Just pulling in the local resources. 617 00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:18,840 There's no way you can get to mate in three moves. 618 00:37:19,080 --> 00:37:21,280 Three moves! You want to know what they are? 619 00:37:21,560 --> 00:37:22,720 You're lying! 620 00:37:23,040 --> 00:37:24,120 No! 621 00:37:25,120 --> 00:37:28,240 Move one, turn on sonic screwdriver. 622 00:37:28,320 --> 00:37:30,480 Move two, activate pulser. 623 00:37:30,560 --> 00:37:32,880 Move three, amplify pulser. 624 00:37:36,720 --> 00:37:37,720 See ya. 625 00:37:40,520 --> 00:37:41,840 That's cheating! 626 00:37:46,760 --> 00:37:48,760 Just taking advantage of the local resources. 627 00:37:49,240 --> 00:37:51,240 Ah, hello. Could somebody untie me, please? 628 00:37:51,320 --> 00:37:52,360 Do you think I'm pretty? 629 00:37:52,440 --> 00:37:54,960 No. You're too short and bossy and your nose is all funny. 630 00:37:55,040 --> 00:37:57,320 Good enough. What happened to the Cyberplanner? 631 00:37:57,400 --> 00:38:00,200 Out of my head and redistributed across three million Cybermen right now 632 00:38:00,360 --> 00:38:02,800 and about to wake them all up, kill us and start constructing a spaceship. 633 00:38:02,880 --> 00:38:05,400 We need to destroy this planet before they can get off it! 634 00:38:06,720 --> 00:38:09,320 Okay. It has a fallback voice activation. 635 00:38:09,600 --> 00:38:11,560 The Captain, but she's dead. 636 00:38:11,680 --> 00:38:13,480 - I think you should ask Porridge. - Why? 637 00:38:13,600 --> 00:38:15,200 Well, he is the Emperor. 638 00:38:15,440 --> 00:38:19,000 I bet he knows the activation codes. Oh, come on, it's obvious. 639 00:38:19,640 --> 00:38:22,640 He looks exactly like he does on the coin. And on the waxwork. 640 00:38:22,720 --> 00:38:24,440 Except they made him a bit taller. 641 00:38:24,520 --> 00:38:27,320 But look, am I the only one paying attention to anything around here? 642 00:38:27,400 --> 00:38:31,040 - You are full of surprises. Porridge? - She's right. 643 00:38:31,160 --> 00:38:32,160 So you can save us? 644 00:38:32,320 --> 00:38:34,200 We all die in the end. Does it matter how? 645 00:38:34,560 --> 00:38:38,040 What do we do? I don't want to be emperor. 646 00:38:38,200 --> 00:38:40,400 If I activate that bomb, it's all over. 647 00:38:40,480 --> 00:38:43,800 And if you don't, three million Cybermen will spread across the galaxy. 648 00:38:44,160 --> 00:38:45,600 Isn't that worth dying for? 649 00:38:45,680 --> 00:38:47,720 - Doctor... - Three million Cybermen. 650 00:38:51,440 --> 00:38:54,240 The bomb, the throne, it's all connected. 651 00:38:54,600 --> 00:38:55,600 I just have to say, 652 00:38:55,680 --> 00:38:59,400 "This is Emperor Ludens Nimrod Kendrick Cordlongstaff the 41st, 653 00:38:59,480 --> 00:39:03,760 "defender of humanity, Imperator of known space. 654 00:39:06,080 --> 00:39:09,760 "Activate the desolator." And it's done. 655 00:39:17,200 --> 00:39:20,080 It'll blow in about 80 seconds, easily long enough for the Imperial flagship 656 00:39:20,360 --> 00:39:24,960 to locate me from my identification, warp jump into orbit and transmat us 657 00:39:25,120 --> 00:39:26,720 to the state room. 658 00:39:34,520 --> 00:39:37,920 Nice ship. A bit big. Not blue enough. Listen, 659 00:39:38,000 --> 00:39:41,960 there is a large blue box at coordinates 6-Ultra-19-P. 660 00:39:42,040 --> 00:39:44,720 I need it transmatted up here right away. 661 00:39:44,800 --> 00:39:46,600 Right. Did you get that? 662 00:39:56,760 --> 00:40:02,120 And that's that. 76, 77, 78, 79... 663 00:40:11,280 --> 00:40:13,280 Farewell, Cyberiad. 664 00:40:14,160 --> 00:40:17,840 You know, it was good to get away. Good to be a person. 665 00:40:18,200 --> 00:40:21,200 Good not to be lonely or emperor of a thousand galaxies 666 00:40:21,280 --> 00:40:23,680 with everyone waiting for me to tell them what to do. 667 00:40:23,800 --> 00:40:24,880 Can't you run away again? 668 00:40:25,520 --> 00:40:27,800 They'll be keeping a close eye on me this time. 669 00:40:27,880 --> 00:40:29,800 That's what happens when you're emperor. 670 00:40:30,080 --> 00:40:32,680 - Loneliest job in the universe. - You don't have to be lonely. 671 00:40:34,880 --> 00:40:36,560 I don't. 672 00:40:37,680 --> 00:40:40,600 Clara, will you marry me? 673 00:40:41,080 --> 00:40:42,080 What? 674 00:40:42,160 --> 00:40:44,200 - He said... - She heard what he said. 675 00:40:44,600 --> 00:40:46,760 You're smart and you're beautiful 676 00:40:46,920 --> 00:40:49,680 and I've never met anyone like you before. 677 00:40:49,760 --> 00:40:52,320 And being Emperor won't be as hard if you're by my side. 678 00:40:52,400 --> 00:40:54,280 And you'd rule a thousand galaxies. 679 00:40:54,360 --> 00:40:57,080 This sounds like an actual marriage proposal. Tricky. 680 00:40:57,160 --> 00:40:58,480 Now, if you want my advice... 681 00:40:58,560 --> 00:41:02,440 You, not one word. This is between me and the Emperor. 682 00:41:04,360 --> 00:41:10,080 Porridge, I don't want to rule a thousand galaxies. 683 00:41:13,920 --> 00:41:16,760 Yeah, silly of me. 684 00:41:18,200 --> 00:41:21,240 - I'm really sorry. - But that's stupid. 685 00:41:21,320 --> 00:41:25,560 You could be queen of the universe. How can you say no to that? 686 00:41:25,640 --> 00:41:28,200 When someone asks you if you want to be queen of the universe, 687 00:41:28,280 --> 00:41:32,280 you say yes. You watch. One day, I'll be queen of the universe. 688 00:41:34,320 --> 00:41:36,960 Of course, I could have you all executed, 689 00:41:37,040 --> 00:41:39,880 which is what a proper emperor would do. 690 00:41:40,000 --> 00:41:42,320 You're not actually going to do that, though, are you? It's... 691 00:41:42,400 --> 00:41:44,880 Oh, you're... Hey? 692 00:41:45,240 --> 00:41:48,840 Go on, get out of here. All of you. Before I change my mind. 693 00:42:02,960 --> 00:42:05,280 Thank you for having me. It was very interesting. 694 00:42:05,480 --> 00:42:08,920 My pleasure. Thank you for coming. Now, I've got something for you. 695 00:42:09,160 --> 00:42:12,000 It's not from me, it's from the Tardis. 696 00:42:13,080 --> 00:42:16,160 - Ah! New phone. - Thanks! 697 00:42:16,240 --> 00:42:18,800 - You're welcome. - Sorry I said this box was stupid. 698 00:42:20,480 --> 00:42:21,480 Bye! 699 00:42:21,600 --> 00:42:23,120 - Bye! - Thanks, Clara. 700 00:42:23,200 --> 00:42:25,640 Thanks, Clara's boyfriend. 701 00:42:27,120 --> 00:42:29,240 - Thank you, Doctor. - For what? 702 00:42:29,360 --> 00:42:31,120 Kids day out, getting us off the planet alive, 703 00:42:31,200 --> 00:42:34,320 whatever you were doing with the Cybermen. 704 00:42:36,160 --> 00:42:37,640 Goodnight. 705 00:42:38,920 --> 00:42:42,800 - See you next Wednesday! - Well, a Wednesday, definitely. 706 00:42:42,960 --> 00:42:46,600 Next Wednesday, last Wednesday. One of the Wednesdays. 707 00:42:49,160 --> 00:42:51,000 Impossible girl. 708 00:42:51,400 --> 00:42:53,040 A mystery wrapped in an enigma, 709 00:42:53,120 --> 00:42:56,720 squeezed into a skirt that's just a little bit too tight. 710 00:43:03,760 --> 00:43:05,520 What are you? 711 00:43:06,840 --> 00:43:08,960 Signs of any Cybertech remaining? 712 00:43:09,160 --> 00:43:11,040 No, Majesty. 713 00:43:11,120 --> 00:43:12,800 Have you ever wanted to be Emperor, Gloria? 714 00:43:12,880 --> 00:43:14,400 No, Majesty. 715 00:43:14,640 --> 00:43:18,040 That's the right answer. Come on, let's go home. 716 00:43:35,920 --> 00:43:38,920 There is one place you must never go. 717 00:43:39,200 --> 00:43:40,240 Where? 718 00:43:40,320 --> 00:43:43,120 This is the Doctor's greatest secret. 719 00:43:43,200 --> 00:43:44,280 And it is discovered. 720 00:43:44,720 --> 00:43:46,040 He can't go there, you know he can't. 721 00:43:46,120 --> 00:43:47,120 I have a duty. 722 00:43:47,200 --> 00:43:49,000 You just said it's one place you must never go. 723 00:43:49,080 --> 00:43:51,160 I'm about to cross my own timeline in the biggest way possible 724 00:43:51,240 --> 00:43:53,000 but the Tardis doesn't like it... 725 00:43:56,200 --> 00:43:57,200 Die, reptile! 726 00:43:58,040 --> 00:43:59,800 Doctor! Doctor! 727 00:43:59,880 --> 00:44:01,680 What is your name? 728 00:44:01,760 --> 00:44:04,320 - It's... Doctor. - Doctor Who?!