1 00:00:19,519 --> 00:00:23,423 Hello and welcome to a Grand Tour special, 2 00:00:23,490 --> 00:00:26,426 the Volkswagen Beetle. 3 00:00:26,493 --> 00:00:28,461 It's a car we hate very much 4 00:00:28,528 --> 00:00:31,998 because it appeals only to Nazis and hippies, 5 00:00:32,066 --> 00:00:35,069 and we are neither of those things. 6 00:00:35,136 --> 00:00:37,537 However, if you remove the bodywork 7 00:00:37,604 --> 00:00:40,006 and replace it with something a bit more fun - 8 00:00:40,073 --> 00:00:41,274 something like this-- 9 00:00:41,341 --> 00:00:43,377 you end up with a beach buggy, 10 00:00:43,444 --> 00:00:45,345 and that's brilliant. 11 00:00:45,412 --> 00:00:47,414 We love beach buggies. 12 00:00:47,481 --> 00:00:49,850 However, Mr. Wilman disagrees. 13 00:00:49,917 --> 00:00:52,119 He says that if they'd been any good, 14 00:00:52,185 --> 00:00:53,554 they would have caught on, 15 00:00:53,621 --> 00:00:56,023 and he points out that they didn't. 16 00:00:56,090 --> 00:00:59,826 So he hatched a plan. And it's this: 17 00:00:59,893 --> 00:01:03,396 he said all three of us must buy a Volkswagen Beetle, 18 00:01:03,463 --> 00:01:05,632 turn it into a beach buggy, 19 00:01:05,698 --> 00:01:06,867 and then report with it 20 00:01:06,933 --> 00:01:11,171 to a wild, rugged and extremely remote place-- 21 00:01:11,239 --> 00:01:14,674 here on the coast of Namibia. 22 00:01:38,331 --> 00:01:40,168 This is what I've built. 23 00:01:41,602 --> 00:01:43,971 It's as close as you can possibly get 24 00:01:44,037 --> 00:01:47,174 to the original 1964 beach buggy 25 00:01:47,207 --> 00:01:48,808 built by Bruce Meyers. 26 00:01:51,378 --> 00:01:55,549 Underneath, it is a 1950s Beetle-- 27 00:01:55,615 --> 00:01:57,450 Beetle floorpan, Beetle suspension, 28 00:01:57,518 --> 00:01:59,253 Beetle engine, Beetle gearbox. 29 00:01:59,319 --> 00:02:00,620 It's got Beetle lights on it. 30 00:02:00,688 --> 00:02:02,290 I've even got a Beetle speedometer 31 00:02:02,355 --> 00:02:04,192 and Beetle hubcaps. 32 00:02:05,358 --> 00:02:07,194 It's brilliant! 33 00:02:10,663 --> 00:02:14,534 This is a beach buggy very like the one that Steve McQueen drove 34 00:02:14,602 --> 00:02:16,336 in the original Thomas Crown Affair. 35 00:02:16,403 --> 00:02:18,406 And if it's good enough-- 36 00:02:18,472 --> 00:02:22,009 - Oh, God. - Ha-ha! 37 00:02:22,074 --> 00:02:24,611 I've been joined by the 1970s. 38 00:02:28,981 --> 00:02:30,251 Yes. 39 00:02:30,318 --> 00:02:34,655 James May has built what a beach buggy was, 40 00:02:34,722 --> 00:02:37,890 what I've built is what a beach buggy can be... 41 00:02:40,828 --> 00:02:43,430 ...if you have a bit of imagination 42 00:02:43,497 --> 00:02:46,234 and some purple metal-flake paint. 43 00:02:46,234 --> 00:02:48,034 Ha-ha-ha-ha! 44 00:02:53,973 --> 00:02:57,411 There, I believe, is the start point of our adventure. 45 00:03:04,418 --> 00:03:06,819 What an extraordinary place. 46 00:03:06,887 --> 00:03:10,424 It's amazing, isn't it? I mean, more seals. 47 00:03:10,490 --> 00:03:13,060 What David Attenborough never told us about those 48 00:03:13,126 --> 00:03:15,996 is how bad they smell. 49 00:03:16,062 --> 00:03:20,401 Sadly, before our nature documentary could go any further, 50 00:03:20,467 --> 00:03:23,570 Richard Hammond emerged from the mist. 51 00:03:23,637 --> 00:03:26,907 Ooh, hello. That's not a beach buggy. 52 00:03:26,973 --> 00:03:29,943 - Is it? - Well, I wouldn't call that... 53 00:03:30,009 --> 00:03:32,312 - Ah-ha! - Oh, geez. 54 00:03:32,379 --> 00:03:33,947 Ladies and gentlemen, Dick-tari! 55 00:03:35,048 --> 00:03:36,283 Behold! 56 00:03:37,284 --> 00:03:38,485 What are you wearing? 57 00:03:38,551 --> 00:03:40,288 What are you wearing? 58 00:03:40,288 --> 00:03:41,489 Well, I'm in Africa! 59 00:03:41,555 --> 00:03:43,022 These trousers, 60 00:03:43,090 --> 00:03:44,457 did they say in the shop, 61 00:03:44,525 --> 00:03:46,093 "I'm afraid they are yellow, sir"? 62 00:03:46,158 --> 00:03:47,495 When you left, they went, "Yes! 63 00:03:47,561 --> 00:03:50,197 20 years we've had those on the hanger!" 64 00:03:50,298 --> 00:03:51,564 Shut up. 65 00:03:51,632 --> 00:03:53,066 And then we must move over to this. 66 00:03:53,133 --> 00:03:54,901 - Yeah. - We were told 67 00:03:54,968 --> 00:03:56,903 to build beach buggies. 68 00:03:56,969 --> 00:03:58,572 - Yes. - Beach buggies. 69 00:03:58,639 --> 00:04:00,441 - It's not a beach buggy. - It isn't. 70 00:04:00,508 --> 00:04:01,842 It is a beach buggy. 71 00:04:01,908 --> 00:04:03,610 It isn't a beach buggy. It's got a roof! 72 00:04:03,676 --> 00:04:05,346 There's no Beetle in here at all. 73 00:04:05,413 --> 00:04:07,514 Yes, there is. Beetle engine in there. 74 00:04:07,580 --> 00:04:10,550 OK, this space-frame chassis... 75 00:04:10,617 --> 00:04:12,185 - Yeah. - Is it from a Beetle? 76 00:04:12,319 --> 00:04:15,323 - No. - These enormous suspension components 77 00:04:15,389 --> 00:04:17,223 that don't even fit under the bodywork. 78 00:04:17,324 --> 00:04:20,761 - You've got two lots of suspension at the back. - Twin shocks. 79 00:04:20,827 --> 00:04:24,964 - Twin shocks? - I like an off-road sort of vibe. 80 00:04:25,031 --> 00:04:27,199 To get here, we had to drive on a beach. 81 00:04:27,334 --> 00:04:28,802 -Yeah. -Ours have made it. 82 00:04:28,869 --> 00:04:31,103 I didn't need two lots of rear suspension on mine. 83 00:04:31,170 --> 00:04:32,372 Neither did I. 84 00:04:32,439 --> 00:04:34,206 Look, we were told to come to Africa. 85 00:04:34,341 --> 00:04:38,978 If we'd been told to go to Santa Monica Beach, then this, with its... 86 00:04:40,112 --> 00:04:41,814 ...incredibly vivid paint... 87 00:04:41,882 --> 00:04:44,050 That's the most metal flake I've ever seen. 88 00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:45,353 Any beach in the world. 89 00:04:45,386 --> 00:04:47,019 Um... 90 00:04:47,086 --> 00:04:49,689 - Hang on, what's that? - That's the engine. 91 00:04:49,757 --> 00:04:52,225 - What engine is it? - V8! 92 00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:53,961 I've put a V8 in a beach buggy! 93 00:04:54,026 --> 00:04:55,262 Well, no, you haven't. 94 00:04:55,362 --> 00:04:57,230 You've parked your beach buggy quite close. 95 00:04:57,365 --> 00:04:58,566 It's not in it! 96 00:04:58,632 --> 00:04:59,932 - It isn't in it. - No. 97 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:01,067 You've reversed into a V8, 98 00:05:01,134 --> 00:05:02,435 but not quite hard enough. 99 00:05:02,502 --> 00:05:04,004 It's only gone in a third of the way. 100 00:05:04,071 --> 00:05:05,773 Do you have any idea how difficult it is 101 00:05:05,838 --> 00:05:07,807 to fit a V8 to a beach buggy? 102 00:05:07,875 --> 00:05:09,377 - Well, it doesn't fit! - It's obviously impossible. 103 00:05:09,377 --> 00:05:10,978 Exactly, it's impossible. 104 00:05:11,043 --> 00:05:12,579 This is no ordinary V8. 105 00:05:12,646 --> 00:05:14,014 It started out in life 106 00:05:14,081 --> 00:05:16,149 as a 3.5 litre V8 from a Range Rover, 107 00:05:16,216 --> 00:05:21,288 but I've modified it, so it produces 180 horsepower. 108 00:05:21,389 --> 00:05:23,255 Can I just say, you were doubting 109 00:05:23,391 --> 00:05:25,091 the credibility of mine as a beach buggy. 110 00:05:25,158 --> 00:05:26,494 Yeah. 111 00:05:26,560 --> 00:05:28,228 The defining characteristic of a beach buggy 112 00:05:28,295 --> 00:05:30,831 is an air-cooled, flat-four Beetle engine. 113 00:05:31,899 --> 00:05:33,401 No, that's not an engine, James. 114 00:05:33,401 --> 00:05:34,601 That's just a fan. 115 00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:36,103 How many horsepower does yours have? 116 00:05:36,168 --> 00:05:37,404 94! 117 00:05:37,437 --> 00:05:39,305 So I have twice as many horsepower. 118 00:05:39,406 --> 00:05:41,542 - Shall I tell you something? - They're not in the car, though. 119 00:05:41,608 --> 00:05:43,411 - They are, they're near it. - Yes. 120 00:05:43,411 --> 00:05:45,745 It's interesting, isn't it? I mean, that is an entire-- 121 00:05:45,812 --> 00:05:47,079 Nothing about that is interesting. 122 00:05:47,146 --> 00:05:48,415 This is a blank canvas 123 00:05:48,415 --> 00:05:49,483 onto which you could paint your personality. 124 00:05:49,550 --> 00:05:51,117 - Yes. - Yours has got 125 00:05:51,183 --> 00:05:52,886 a prolapsed V8 hanging out of its backside 126 00:05:52,952 --> 00:05:54,120 and terrible paint. 127 00:05:54,187 --> 00:05:55,523 Mine is a rather magnificent 128 00:05:55,588 --> 00:05:56,889 "Daktari"-themed off-roader. 129 00:05:56,956 --> 00:05:59,292 That's got nothing on it! 130 00:05:59,427 --> 00:06:01,028 - You can express... - It is a bit boring. 131 00:06:01,093 --> 00:06:02,696 ...all your personality, and it's standard. 132 00:06:02,762 --> 00:06:04,264 It's not... What do you mean, standard? 133 00:06:04,331 --> 00:06:05,432 It's a beach buggy. 134 00:06:05,499 --> 00:06:06,867 It's tasteful. 135 00:06:06,934 --> 00:06:08,100 What? 136 00:06:09,437 --> 00:06:12,105 - Oh. - The bat sat-phone. 137 00:06:12,172 --> 00:06:13,641 We've got a message from... 138 00:06:14,507 --> 00:06:15,509 Mr. Wilman. 139 00:06:15,576 --> 00:06:16,843 Right, go on. 140 00:06:16,910 --> 00:06:18,245 "Since you're in beach buggies..." 141 00:06:18,310 --> 00:06:19,913 Well, us two are. 142 00:06:19,980 --> 00:06:21,882 "Since you're in beach buggies, 143 00:06:21,949 --> 00:06:25,052 you will now drive to the beach." 144 00:06:25,117 --> 00:06:26,185 Uh... 145 00:06:26,252 --> 00:06:27,353 Uh...do you think 146 00:06:27,454 --> 00:06:28,956 he's taken leave of his senses? 147 00:06:29,021 --> 00:06:30,790 Well, he was never that good at geography, was he? 148 00:06:30,858 --> 00:06:32,893 No, he wasn't. "You'll now drive to the beach." 149 00:06:32,959 --> 00:06:34,293 Hold on. Oh, no, there's more. 150 00:06:34,360 --> 00:06:36,096 "The beach to which you will drive 151 00:06:36,163 --> 00:06:41,168 is located on the crocodile-infested Kunene River 152 00:06:41,233 --> 00:06:46,139 at the northernmost point of Namibia, where it meets Angola. 153 00:06:46,206 --> 00:06:48,175 It's 1,000 miles away." 154 00:06:49,677 --> 00:06:53,180 - 1,000 miles? - 1,000. 155 00:06:53,245 --> 00:06:56,115 What we needed at this point was a map, 156 00:06:56,182 --> 00:06:59,218 so we decided to head north up the coast 157 00:06:59,286 --> 00:07:01,053 and find the nearest town. 158 00:07:01,120 --> 00:07:03,490 Let the journey begin! 159 00:07:07,894 --> 00:07:10,831 And what a journey it would be in these cars, 160 00:07:10,898 --> 00:07:14,701 cars that were born in interesting times. 161 00:07:16,504 --> 00:07:18,971 So, it's 1964, 162 00:07:19,038 --> 00:07:22,175 the word "teenager" has started to appear 163 00:07:22,242 --> 00:07:23,644 in the world's dictionaries, 164 00:07:23,711 --> 00:07:26,547 people are listening to new types of music, 165 00:07:26,613 --> 00:07:29,682 they're smoking new types of stuff. 166 00:07:29,750 --> 00:07:33,954 And then, in California, the beach buggy arrived! 167 00:07:39,192 --> 00:07:40,593 It was perfect! 168 00:07:40,661 --> 00:07:43,329 Girls and boys, beach barbecues... 169 00:07:43,396 --> 00:07:46,899 The first design criteria was that the front fenders were flat, 170 00:07:46,966 --> 00:07:49,201 so you could stand a beer on it. 171 00:07:49,269 --> 00:07:51,038 That's how you design a car! 172 00:07:54,841 --> 00:07:59,547 Jimi Hendrix had a beach buggy and President Nixon didn't. 173 00:07:59,579 --> 00:08:01,548 Tells you all you need to know. 174 00:08:03,951 --> 00:08:07,353 What I really like about the beach buggy is that it's a testament 175 00:08:07,420 --> 00:08:10,990 to the ability of the human spirit to triumph. 176 00:08:11,057 --> 00:08:12,959 Because somebody looked at the Beetle and said, 177 00:08:13,026 --> 00:08:17,363 "Well, that's the legacy of the world's worst dictator. 178 00:08:17,430 --> 00:08:19,266 Let's turn it into a beach car." 179 00:08:23,002 --> 00:08:24,805 After a lonely hour 180 00:08:24,872 --> 00:08:27,007 of driving north through the swirling mist, 181 00:08:27,074 --> 00:08:29,677 we still hadn't found a town, 182 00:08:29,742 --> 00:08:32,879 but we did find something else. 183 00:08:34,181 --> 00:08:35,582 Jesus. 184 00:08:56,269 --> 00:08:57,605 I'll tell you what, 185 00:08:57,671 --> 00:08:59,438 he must have been going at a right old lick 186 00:08:59,505 --> 00:09:00,607 when he hit the beach. 187 00:09:00,607 --> 00:09:01,808 He must have been. 188 00:09:01,875 --> 00:09:03,811 Right, the sea is there. 189 00:09:03,876 --> 00:09:05,445 That's half a mile away. 190 00:09:05,511 --> 00:09:06,513 I'd say so. 191 00:09:06,614 --> 00:09:07,847 So he got it up the beach, 192 00:09:07,914 --> 00:09:09,381 and then sort of did a handbrake turn. 193 00:09:09,448 --> 00:09:11,684 -Power-slided it in. -How do you do a handbrake... 194 00:09:11,751 --> 00:09:14,053 How did it get here, seriously? 195 00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:16,856 Can I just say... my nipples are erect. 196 00:09:16,923 --> 00:09:19,225 - What, 'cause of this jacket? - No. 197 00:09:19,292 --> 00:09:20,628 - Oh. - It's cold. 198 00:09:20,661 --> 00:09:23,062 - It is, isn't it? - It's cold. 199 00:09:23,129 --> 00:09:25,432 That's an unwise wardrobe strategy. 200 00:09:25,498 --> 00:09:26,667 Yeah, well, you know, 201 00:09:26,734 --> 00:09:28,936 Africa, on a beach, I thought... 202 00:09:29,001 --> 00:09:30,770 - So did I. - I'm surprised. 203 00:09:32,239 --> 00:09:35,307 The beach has got the sea haar on it - 204 00:09:35,375 --> 00:09:37,144 mist, fog, cold. 205 00:09:37,210 --> 00:09:40,312 - If you look over there... - Hm. 206 00:09:40,379 --> 00:09:42,014 ...sunshine, blue sky. 207 00:09:42,081 --> 00:09:44,652 - Why don't we just go inland... - The coast road. 208 00:09:44,652 --> 00:09:47,354 Find the coast road which will take us to a town. 209 00:09:47,419 --> 00:09:49,722 And that'll be in the sun. That's a better idea. 210 00:09:50,923 --> 00:09:52,325 With a plan worked out, 211 00:09:52,392 --> 00:09:54,662 it was time to get moving again. 212 00:09:58,765 --> 00:10:00,067 Oh, dear. 213 00:10:00,133 --> 00:10:02,168 Did you modify the battery as well? 214 00:10:02,235 --> 00:10:04,303 Oh... 215 00:10:04,370 --> 00:10:07,774 - It's obviously not charging up. - No. 216 00:10:07,841 --> 00:10:09,576 Because I didn't modify it. 217 00:10:09,643 --> 00:10:10,744 Yeah. 218 00:10:10,811 --> 00:10:12,511 I'll just see if mine works. 219 00:10:14,114 --> 00:10:16,448 - Oh, yeah. - Let me just try mine. 220 00:10:16,515 --> 00:10:18,751 Yeah. 221 00:10:18,818 --> 00:10:20,888 - Push? - Hm? 222 00:10:20,953 --> 00:10:24,124 Can I have a push? 223 00:10:31,230 --> 00:10:33,966 After the film crew had got me going, 224 00:10:34,033 --> 00:10:37,971 I used my massive horsepower to catch the others. 225 00:10:44,277 --> 00:10:47,246 But by the time we were back together again... 226 00:10:48,447 --> 00:10:50,383 it was going dark. 227 00:10:50,450 --> 00:10:54,187 The sun, as you can see over my shoulder, has set, 228 00:10:54,254 --> 00:10:56,724 and we still haven't found a road. 229 00:10:56,789 --> 00:11:00,092 It's also going to be very, very, very cold. 230 00:11:01,761 --> 00:11:03,096 Lights on. 231 00:11:10,370 --> 00:11:12,438 We have got to find this road. 232 00:11:13,907 --> 00:11:15,875 This is not going to be too clever... 233 00:11:17,144 --> 00:11:18,411 in the dark. 234 00:11:24,918 --> 00:11:27,120 I've rather crudely rigged up my torch, 235 00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:29,923 wedged in the windscreen rail, 236 00:11:29,990 --> 00:11:33,994 in the hope that you can see my last pieces to camera. 237 00:11:37,831 --> 00:11:39,466 Oh, bollocks! 238 00:11:43,836 --> 00:11:45,404 Oh, cold! 239 00:11:49,042 --> 00:11:50,376 Finally, though, 240 00:11:50,442 --> 00:11:53,679 it looked like our luck had changed. 241 00:11:53,780 --> 00:11:55,648 Ooh, hello! Hello! 242 00:11:55,783 --> 00:11:57,116 What's that? 243 00:12:03,623 --> 00:12:05,325 - It's not a hotel. - No. 244 00:12:07,794 --> 00:12:09,461 It smells of excrement! 245 00:12:09,528 --> 00:12:10,629 Oh, wow, look at this! 246 00:12:10,697 --> 00:12:12,799 There's still, like, plates 247 00:12:12,799 --> 00:12:14,201 and cups and saucers and things in here. 248 00:12:14,267 --> 00:12:15,869 I'll tell you exactly what this is. 249 00:12:15,936 --> 00:12:17,303 It's an abandoned mine. 250 00:12:18,471 --> 00:12:20,673 They do mine round in Namibia, don't they? 251 00:12:20,807 --> 00:12:21,942 What do they mine for? 252 00:12:22,009 --> 00:12:23,543 - Diamonds. - Diamonds? 253 00:12:23,610 --> 00:12:26,245 Yeah, but they wouldn't have left if there were any. 254 00:12:26,312 --> 00:12:28,514 They obviously left, and not yesterday. 255 00:12:31,217 --> 00:12:34,453 Look, there's no road here, is there? 256 00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:35,488 - No. - No. 257 00:12:35,554 --> 00:12:36,923 Apart from anything else, 258 00:12:36,990 --> 00:12:38,625 we can't find our way around in the dark 259 00:12:38,691 --> 00:12:39,725 'cause we can't navigate. 260 00:12:39,826 --> 00:12:41,327 - Well, I can. - How? 261 00:12:41,394 --> 00:12:42,962 - How? - Stars. 262 00:12:43,029 --> 00:12:44,397 - No, you can't. - I can. 263 00:12:44,463 --> 00:12:47,835 I can't do very many things, I admit... 264 00:12:47,835 --> 00:12:49,836 ...anything, but I can do that. 265 00:12:49,903 --> 00:12:51,571 How do you navigate by the stars? 266 00:12:51,638 --> 00:12:52,972 Uh... find the Southern Cross. 267 00:12:53,039 --> 00:12:54,573 Yeah, but that's really complicated. 268 00:12:54,640 --> 00:12:57,277 Right, do you want to sleep in the excrement mine? 269 00:12:57,344 --> 00:12:58,644 No, this is out. 270 00:12:58,711 --> 00:13:00,379 So, we have to keep going, 271 00:13:00,447 --> 00:13:02,615 whether we like it or not, till we find... 272 00:13:02,682 --> 00:13:04,250 We have to, so listen. 273 00:13:04,317 --> 00:13:06,753 I shall find the Southern Cross. 274 00:13:06,854 --> 00:13:09,089 You can't find the Southern Cross with a hammer. 275 00:13:09,155 --> 00:13:11,958 I've found it! Ha! I've found it. It's there. 276 00:13:12,024 --> 00:13:13,559 It's like a kite. 277 00:13:13,625 --> 00:13:14,995 - That one there? - Yeah. 278 00:13:15,062 --> 00:13:16,864 It's a kite shape. It's sort of... 279 00:13:16,929 --> 00:13:20,732 Now, you take the long axis, yes? 280 00:13:20,868 --> 00:13:21,869 - Yes. - Mm-hm. 281 00:13:21,902 --> 00:13:24,004 And draw an imaginary line 282 00:13:24,071 --> 00:13:27,474 through it, down to the horizon. 283 00:13:27,539 --> 00:13:29,076 Yes? Now, you intersect it 284 00:13:29,142 --> 00:13:32,211 from a line drawn between two other stars, 285 00:13:32,278 --> 00:13:35,048 and where those two imaginary lines meet, 286 00:13:35,115 --> 00:13:38,618 directly underneath it is due south. 287 00:13:38,684 --> 00:13:40,653 So if it's those two-- 288 00:13:40,720 --> 00:13:42,455 which it is, I'm sure of it-- 289 00:13:42,522 --> 00:13:44,490 you draw a line... 290 00:13:49,796 --> 00:13:52,399 Oh, this is a bad idea! 291 00:13:52,465 --> 00:13:55,134 We are now trusting our lives to an orangutan 292 00:13:55,201 --> 00:13:57,004 who thinks he's Patrick Moore. 293 00:13:59,338 --> 00:14:02,609 There it is. There's the two stars. 294 00:14:03,910 --> 00:14:06,712 Draw a line... 295 00:14:06,778 --> 00:14:10,182 I'm not getting many directions from you, Jeremy. Is this right? 296 00:14:10,250 --> 00:14:12,919 You're heading a little bit too much to the right. 297 00:14:12,985 --> 00:14:15,022 You need to go left a bit. 298 00:14:15,087 --> 00:14:17,990 Good, good. Oh, I'm so confident. 299 00:14:18,057 --> 00:14:23,296 You two are going to be eating humble pie when the sun comes up. 300 00:14:27,167 --> 00:14:28,835 Despite the confidence 301 00:14:28,936 --> 00:14:30,602 of Jeremy Columbus, 302 00:14:30,669 --> 00:14:33,039 no road appeared. 303 00:14:34,673 --> 00:14:36,076 Oh, this is grim. 304 00:14:40,047 --> 00:14:42,315 Excuse me. 305 00:14:42,381 --> 00:14:45,418 I've been on the go a very, very long time now. 306 00:14:47,653 --> 00:14:52,125 Guys, I'm sorry. I'm not driving another inch. 307 00:14:52,192 --> 00:14:53,994 I can't do this. 308 00:14:54,061 --> 00:14:55,495 It's three o'clock in the morning. 309 00:14:55,562 --> 00:14:56,963 I'm exhausted. 310 00:14:56,963 --> 00:14:59,466 He does have a point. 311 00:15:05,837 --> 00:15:07,340 The next morning, 312 00:15:07,407 --> 00:15:10,043 we woke, having slept on the sand, 313 00:15:10,110 --> 00:15:12,644 huddled round our engines for warmth. 314 00:15:41,140 --> 00:15:43,309 You muppet. What's that? 315 00:15:43,375 --> 00:15:44,376 Um... 316 00:15:45,711 --> 00:15:48,014 "Um" what? 317 00:15:48,048 --> 00:15:51,084 I never knew Namibia had two seas. 318 00:15:51,150 --> 00:15:52,519 It doesn't have two seas. 319 00:15:52,585 --> 00:15:54,187 No, it has one massive "cee" in it. 320 00:15:54,254 --> 00:15:55,654 One massive, stupid "cee" 321 00:15:55,721 --> 00:15:57,657 that's navigated us back to where we started. 322 00:15:57,724 --> 00:15:59,725 - Can I just say... - It wasn't my... I... 323 00:15:59,792 --> 00:16:02,028 Why did we even believe you could navigate by the stars? 324 00:16:02,095 --> 00:16:03,429 You can't even read a compass. 325 00:16:03,495 --> 00:16:06,099 There are two "cees". There's two "cees" here 326 00:16:06,166 --> 00:16:08,268 for believing that that "cee" could navigate us. 327 00:16:08,335 --> 00:16:10,370 - No, you're right. - I couldn't possibly... 328 00:16:10,437 --> 00:16:12,871 Really, I don't understand that. 329 00:16:12,938 --> 00:16:15,774 Freezing cold, sandpapered on the face... 330 00:16:15,841 --> 00:16:18,278 - You've got a coat on. - It's thin. Have you felt it? 331 00:16:18,345 --> 00:16:20,179 I haven't even got a thin coat. 332 00:16:20,246 --> 00:16:21,581 I've only got a T-shirt. Anyway, 333 00:16:21,648 --> 00:16:23,149 I'm not going to be competitive with you 334 00:16:23,216 --> 00:16:24,551 about who's the coldest. 335 00:16:24,616 --> 00:16:26,452 - I'm the coldest! - We're all the lostest. 336 00:16:26,519 --> 00:16:28,821 Never mind. Look, let's not get bogged down 337 00:16:28,888 --> 00:16:30,222 with whose fault it was. 338 00:16:30,289 --> 00:16:32,158 There's no being bogged down with it, is there? 339 00:16:32,225 --> 00:16:34,126 It was yours. 340 00:16:34,193 --> 00:16:35,961 We can either go back into the desert 341 00:16:36,062 --> 00:16:37,563 to look for a road, 342 00:16:37,629 --> 00:16:39,966 or we can just do what we were doing yesterday, 343 00:16:40,067 --> 00:16:41,533 and stay on the beach. 344 00:16:41,600 --> 00:16:43,970 At least we know, if we keep the sea on our left, 345 00:16:44,071 --> 00:16:45,238 we're going north. 346 00:16:45,304 --> 00:16:46,673 - Yes. - That's a fair point. 347 00:16:46,739 --> 00:16:49,241 - Let's navigate by the sea. - Yes. 348 00:16:50,543 --> 00:16:53,113 With our new-- well, newish-- 349 00:16:53,179 --> 00:16:54,313 plan in place, 350 00:16:54,380 --> 00:16:56,182 we set off once more. 351 00:16:57,783 --> 00:17:01,754 So here we are. These are our wheel marks from yesterday. 352 00:17:02,955 --> 00:17:06,393 24 hours of cold, misery... 353 00:17:06,459 --> 00:17:08,428 to achieve exactly nothing. 354 00:17:08,494 --> 00:17:11,131 I mean, it is exactly nothing. 355 00:17:11,198 --> 00:17:14,500 But, apart from that and the weather... 356 00:17:14,567 --> 00:17:19,405 and Jeremy Clarkson, it's all going really well. 357 00:17:19,471 --> 00:17:21,273 As we continued north, 358 00:17:21,340 --> 00:17:23,776 the misery of the previous day was banished 359 00:17:23,843 --> 00:17:27,579 by the sheer bigness of our surroundings. 360 00:17:27,646 --> 00:17:30,583 Oh, this is an astonishing place. 361 00:17:33,552 --> 00:17:37,457 I've got a dune the size of Mount Everest to my right, 362 00:17:37,523 --> 00:17:40,727 the Atlantic Ocean to my left... 363 00:17:41,927 --> 00:17:44,697 This is absolutely epic. 364 00:17:53,306 --> 00:17:55,142 This is proper beach buggy driving. 365 00:17:55,208 --> 00:17:58,611 Sun's out, sea's there with the surf. 366 00:17:58,677 --> 00:18:00,579 It's like being in the Beach Boys. 367 00:18:05,417 --> 00:18:07,554 Amidst all this loveliness, though, 368 00:18:07,619 --> 00:18:12,825 there was one small elephant edging its way into the room. 369 00:18:12,892 --> 00:18:14,727 Chaps, I don't want to have to say this, 370 00:18:14,794 --> 00:18:18,230 but is the tide coming in or going out? 371 00:18:20,166 --> 00:18:22,701 Uh...I'm guessing in. 372 00:18:24,804 --> 00:18:27,307 There's no way up the sides of that. 373 00:18:28,540 --> 00:18:32,010 And if the tide comes in that far, which it does, 374 00:18:32,077 --> 00:18:34,181 we've had it. 375 00:18:34,247 --> 00:18:35,815 Got to keep moving here. 376 00:18:35,882 --> 00:18:37,517 We cannot afford to get stuck. 377 00:18:41,753 --> 00:18:44,191 With some generous use of the throttle, 378 00:18:44,191 --> 00:18:45,625 we managed to get clear 379 00:18:45,692 --> 00:18:48,595 of the sea-and-sand-dune pincer movement. 380 00:18:48,661 --> 00:18:51,631 But then we had another problem. 381 00:18:54,601 --> 00:18:56,702 I'd say that was the end of the beach. 382 00:18:57,936 --> 00:18:59,771 How does that just end like that? 383 00:18:59,838 --> 00:19:01,708 - It does just end. - That is the end. 384 00:19:01,773 --> 00:19:04,042 And the Namibian government doesn't allow us 385 00:19:04,109 --> 00:19:06,679 to drive on the salt pans, and that's what that is. 386 00:19:06,746 --> 00:19:08,315 This meant, according to James, 387 00:19:08,381 --> 00:19:11,683 we had only one option. 388 00:19:11,750 --> 00:19:13,553 We've got to go back the way we came. 389 00:19:13,619 --> 00:19:14,987 But if the tide's coming in, 390 00:19:15,054 --> 00:19:18,325 that narrow bit will have become impassable. 391 00:19:18,391 --> 00:19:22,028 That's why I think if we see a good opportunity to turn left, 392 00:19:22,094 --> 00:19:24,364 like we did last night, we do it. 393 00:19:24,431 --> 00:19:26,398 Are you honestly suggesting we go back in the... 394 00:19:26,465 --> 00:19:28,234 Well, where else can we go? 395 00:19:28,234 --> 00:19:30,336 We'll either drown or starve otherwise. 396 00:19:36,242 --> 00:19:37,676 Right, we've just got to find a bit 397 00:19:37,743 --> 00:19:41,748 where we can get inland before the tide comes in. 398 00:19:47,287 --> 00:19:49,822 That is getting closer to that, 399 00:19:49,888 --> 00:19:51,624 and when that happens, we've had it. 400 00:19:56,262 --> 00:19:57,963 But as we thundered along, 401 00:19:58,029 --> 00:20:01,468 the dunes refused to open up and let us in. 402 00:20:03,134 --> 00:20:04,503 That's the sea! 403 00:20:05,404 --> 00:20:07,273 It's the sea, there! 404 00:20:08,974 --> 00:20:10,509 Oh, it's coming at me! 405 00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:15,582 I still say we can't get out here, look. 406 00:20:15,647 --> 00:20:17,549 No left turn at the moment. 407 00:20:21,453 --> 00:20:23,722 This is where you need a V8! 408 00:20:27,192 --> 00:20:28,394 Oh, shit. 409 00:20:29,828 --> 00:20:32,332 Oh, Jeremy's in trouble! 410 00:20:32,398 --> 00:20:34,099 That is not looking good! 411 00:20:35,434 --> 00:20:37,103 Come on, come on. Whoa. 412 00:20:38,938 --> 00:20:40,707 Oh, no. 413 00:20:42,909 --> 00:20:45,644 Oh, no. No, no, no. Not a good place. 414 00:20:45,711 --> 00:20:48,114 Oh, God. 415 00:20:48,180 --> 00:20:49,816 Uh...I'm in the sea. 416 00:20:51,384 --> 00:20:53,452 Because it was a bit of an emergency, 417 00:20:53,519 --> 00:20:56,255 my colleagues decided to help for once. 418 00:20:56,323 --> 00:20:59,057 Go. 419 00:20:59,125 --> 00:21:00,192 No. 420 00:21:00,259 --> 00:21:01,894 Is that just spinning? 421 00:21:01,961 --> 00:21:03,529 It's beached under there. 422 00:21:03,596 --> 00:21:05,498 I don't see why I can't push him with that. 423 00:21:05,565 --> 00:21:07,799 -All right, then. Try. -All right. 424 00:21:07,866 --> 00:21:09,568 James, count us in. 425 00:21:09,635 --> 00:21:12,038 Three, two, one, away! 426 00:21:17,644 --> 00:21:20,346 - Yes! - Right, let's go! 427 00:21:22,348 --> 00:21:27,086 Me getting beached cost us time we never had in the first place, 428 00:21:27,153 --> 00:21:29,422 and we were still trapped. 429 00:21:32,825 --> 00:21:34,059 Jesus Christ. 430 00:21:36,127 --> 00:21:37,829 Ah, it's coming in. 431 00:21:41,500 --> 00:21:43,670 Come on, come on, come on. 432 00:21:45,203 --> 00:21:46,506 Come on. 433 00:21:48,039 --> 00:21:49,075 Whoa! 434 00:21:54,381 --> 00:21:55,615 Oh! 435 00:21:57,249 --> 00:21:58,518 Oh, that's bad. 436 00:22:02,188 --> 00:22:03,221 Shit. 437 00:22:05,924 --> 00:22:06,992 Whoa! 438 00:22:09,628 --> 00:22:11,096 Come on, baby, come on. 439 00:22:13,400 --> 00:22:17,503 Mercifully, the dunes finally started to fall away 440 00:22:17,569 --> 00:22:19,571 and we were saved. 441 00:22:22,509 --> 00:22:25,511 -And we're through! -We are, we are. 442 00:22:25,577 --> 00:22:26,878 That's a relief. 443 00:22:29,516 --> 00:22:31,083 So nearly got stuck then. 444 00:22:34,686 --> 00:22:37,656 We'd now been on the go for 36 hours, 445 00:22:37,723 --> 00:22:42,662 and we were pretty much back where we started from... again. 446 00:22:42,729 --> 00:22:45,664 We were also soaked, frozen, worn out, 447 00:22:45,731 --> 00:22:47,666 and because we had no food with us, 448 00:22:47,733 --> 00:22:49,801 we were also hungry. 449 00:22:49,868 --> 00:22:53,705 But then Bear Clarkson came to the rescue. 450 00:22:53,772 --> 00:22:57,242 Cold you go and get some driftwood for a fire? 451 00:22:57,308 --> 00:23:01,180 And could you fashion a rudimentary barbecue grill of some sort? 452 00:23:01,247 --> 00:23:03,715 OK. Where did you get the fishing rod from? 453 00:23:03,782 --> 00:23:05,884 It's my whip aerial. It's a beach buggy. 454 00:23:05,951 --> 00:23:08,153 - I thought of that. - They're fishing rods. 455 00:23:15,795 --> 00:23:18,597 This is going to make a perfect little fish grill thing, look. 456 00:23:23,603 --> 00:23:25,136 Have you got a fire lit yet? 457 00:23:25,203 --> 00:23:26,472 I thought you were fishing. 458 00:23:26,472 --> 00:23:28,740 I am fishing. My car's fishing. 459 00:23:28,807 --> 00:23:30,843 - Look. - Well, is it? 460 00:23:30,910 --> 00:23:33,078 - Yeah, look, I've got the rods attached. - It's parked. 461 00:23:33,144 --> 00:23:35,013 - What's that? - That's the grill. 462 00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:37,650 So we hold that with the pliers from my multi-tool, 463 00:23:37,717 --> 00:23:39,652 cut the fish up, fillet it... 464 00:23:39,719 --> 00:23:43,556 Can you do that? There's no point asking him. He can open a tin... 465 00:23:43,623 --> 00:23:45,023 Can you fillet a fish? 466 00:23:45,090 --> 00:23:47,159 - What, is it only fish? - Well, it's the sea! 467 00:23:47,226 --> 00:23:49,828 What did you think I was going to catch, a chicken? 468 00:23:49,895 --> 00:23:51,063 Oh, my God! 469 00:23:56,268 --> 00:23:59,506 - Oh, my God! - No, wait. Yes! 470 00:23:59,506 --> 00:24:01,708 Ha-ha-ha-ha! 471 00:24:01,773 --> 00:24:04,042 While Hammond went off to get more driftwood, 472 00:24:04,109 --> 00:24:07,614 James and I set about gutting the catch. 473 00:24:07,680 --> 00:24:11,282 Use his car as the table. There we go. 474 00:24:11,349 --> 00:24:14,420 - That's his gut. Look. You've got it. - Yeah, right. 475 00:24:14,520 --> 00:24:16,021 Oh, God. Shit. Look, 476 00:24:16,087 --> 00:24:17,856 it's all gone literally onto his exhaust. 477 00:24:17,923 --> 00:24:20,358 Oh, no. Never mind. Look, I need your help. 478 00:24:20,425 --> 00:24:21,794 Right, saw its head off. 479 00:24:23,730 --> 00:24:26,865 - Ah, there we go. - Excellent. 480 00:24:26,932 --> 00:24:29,134 - I think, but I'm not sure-- - It's gone under his seat. 481 00:24:29,201 --> 00:24:30,435 Oh, no. Has it? 482 00:24:30,537 --> 00:24:32,070 It's all right, I'll get it out later. 483 00:24:36,174 --> 00:24:38,176 Oh, it's done a treat, this. 484 00:24:38,243 --> 00:24:39,878 Look at this, Hammond. 485 00:24:42,248 --> 00:24:44,450 Mm. 486 00:24:44,550 --> 00:24:45,884 Oh, that's all right, isn't it? 487 00:24:48,019 --> 00:24:49,154 Ooh. 488 00:24:54,727 --> 00:24:56,563 It tastes like fish, doesn't it? 489 00:24:57,730 --> 00:24:59,832 OK, does anybody want a beer? 490 00:25:01,032 --> 00:25:02,401 - Have you got some? - No. 491 00:25:02,468 --> 00:25:04,971 Oh, you... 492 00:25:05,037 --> 00:25:07,640 That deserves a stabbing. 493 00:25:07,707 --> 00:25:08,775 That is a proper stabbing. 494 00:25:08,840 --> 00:25:10,108 That's properly out of order. 495 00:25:13,846 --> 00:25:15,181 After lunch, 496 00:25:15,247 --> 00:25:17,849 we set off once more into the dunes. 497 00:25:20,152 --> 00:25:22,821 Right, so let's keep heading east. 498 00:25:22,888 --> 00:25:25,825 And we must come to a road at some... 499 00:25:25,892 --> 00:25:28,627 There has to be a road. 500 00:25:28,694 --> 00:25:31,597 But, for mile after mile, 501 00:25:31,597 --> 00:25:32,898 there wasn't. 502 00:25:44,509 --> 00:25:46,045 It's the Namib Desert. 503 00:25:46,112 --> 00:25:50,982 "Namib" in the local dialect means "big nothing". 504 00:25:56,154 --> 00:26:00,259 It must be the prettiest desert in the world. 505 00:26:00,326 --> 00:26:02,094 It's just a sea of dunes. 506 00:26:07,298 --> 00:26:10,368 Dunes which were getting bigger. 507 00:26:10,435 --> 00:26:13,972 Bloody Nora, look at the size of that! 508 00:26:15,942 --> 00:26:20,278 Engaging 180 horsepower. 509 00:26:20,346 --> 00:26:23,382 Climbing them in our two-wheel-drive beach buggies 510 00:26:23,449 --> 00:26:25,084 was becoming tricky. 511 00:26:26,986 --> 00:26:32,191 Come on, you can do this. You can do this! 512 00:26:32,258 --> 00:26:37,296 But by deploying the V8, I was sort of all right. 513 00:26:37,363 --> 00:26:38,463 Yes! 514 00:26:38,529 --> 00:26:41,366 Oh-ho-ho-ho! 515 00:26:41,432 --> 00:26:45,570 Hammond had grippy tyres, so he was all right, too. 516 00:26:45,672 --> 00:26:48,240 Please, make it. Please. 517 00:26:49,675 --> 00:26:50,910 Please! 518 00:26:53,045 --> 00:26:54,380 Ho-ho! 519 00:26:54,445 --> 00:26:55,948 There you go! 520 00:26:56,015 --> 00:26:58,984 However, back in the 1960s... 521 00:27:01,753 --> 00:27:03,990 Come on, little car. 522 00:27:04,056 --> 00:27:06,424 Oh, no, no, no. 523 00:27:06,491 --> 00:27:07,558 No, no. 524 00:27:19,171 --> 00:27:20,405 - Stuck? - Yes. 525 00:27:20,471 --> 00:27:22,107 Two problems. Number one, 526 00:27:22,173 --> 00:27:24,711 he's put a 90 horsepower engine in it, 527 00:27:24,711 --> 00:27:26,444 which actually is probably only 40. 528 00:27:26,511 --> 00:27:27,846 - Yeah. - And number two, 529 00:27:27,913 --> 00:27:30,717 he will not use full power ever. 530 00:27:30,750 --> 00:27:34,319 Well, he's got a 90 horsepower engine, but a 5 horsepower foot. 531 00:27:36,154 --> 00:27:39,125 And I bet you any money he's saying "I had a misfire." 532 00:27:46,999 --> 00:27:48,835 You've got to push the accelerator all the way to-- 533 00:27:48,901 --> 00:27:50,135 I know, but... I know that. 534 00:27:50,201 --> 00:27:52,337 It occasionally has a little misfire moment, 535 00:27:52,403 --> 00:27:53,572 and then I lose it. 536 00:27:53,638 --> 00:27:55,406 He said it! 537 00:27:57,844 --> 00:28:00,346 And so the afternoon continued. 538 00:28:00,412 --> 00:28:04,549 The Grunt Machine and the Grit Machine would forge ahead... 539 00:28:04,615 --> 00:28:08,453 There is no way in hell I'm doing this! 540 00:28:08,519 --> 00:28:10,155 Yes! 541 00:28:13,659 --> 00:28:15,560 You star! 542 00:28:15,626 --> 00:28:16,929 ...and then there'd be 543 00:28:16,996 --> 00:28:19,798 the inevitable radio exchange. 544 00:28:19,865 --> 00:28:21,834 We appear to be a man down, Jeremy. 545 00:28:21,901 --> 00:28:24,403 James May, where are you? 546 00:28:29,407 --> 00:28:31,410 Because we spent so much time 547 00:28:31,477 --> 00:28:34,046 waiting for Captain Misfire, 548 00:28:34,113 --> 00:28:37,215 we were still in the desert as dusk fell. 549 00:28:37,282 --> 00:28:41,319 And failing light meant it was hard to spot obstacles. 550 00:28:42,922 --> 00:28:44,623 Right, sit rep. 551 00:28:44,690 --> 00:28:48,027 Jesus Christ! 552 00:28:48,094 --> 00:28:50,797 Holy... 553 00:28:53,265 --> 00:28:55,701 Oh, my God! 554 00:28:55,801 --> 00:28:58,436 Oh, shit! 555 00:28:58,503 --> 00:29:00,439 Look at it! 556 00:29:00,506 --> 00:29:02,441 Mate, I've got to have a look. 557 00:29:05,411 --> 00:29:08,213 Oh, shitty death... 558 00:29:10,115 --> 00:29:13,019 - I locked up. That was just... - Look, he's buried! 559 00:29:13,085 --> 00:29:16,688 - You've buried the front. - I was completely locked up. 560 00:29:16,823 --> 00:29:18,257 'Cause I would have gone down that. 561 00:29:18,324 --> 00:29:19,826 Look at it! 562 00:29:22,428 --> 00:29:25,364 My close shave was a reminder that, after dark, 563 00:29:25,431 --> 00:29:29,167 these dunes would become very, very dangerous. 564 00:29:34,539 --> 00:29:37,643 It's getting harder and harder to read the terrain now. 565 00:29:37,709 --> 00:29:39,278 Is that a drop? Is that a hill? 566 00:29:39,345 --> 00:29:41,847 Is that going up? Is that a cliff? What is it? 567 00:29:43,982 --> 00:29:46,018 Peril... peril. 568 00:29:47,452 --> 00:29:48,988 Oh, shit! 569 00:29:49,055 --> 00:29:50,957 Oh, I think there's a drop off there. 570 00:29:51,990 --> 00:29:53,759 It's just a black abyss. 571 00:29:53,859 --> 00:29:57,096 That could be a huge cliff again. 572 00:29:59,999 --> 00:30:02,268 Eventually, we could take no more, 573 00:30:02,334 --> 00:30:07,272 and we had to settle down for a second night around our engines. 574 00:30:30,561 --> 00:30:33,699 We will find a road. There must... 575 00:30:33,765 --> 00:30:36,501 - It can't... It can't go on forever, can it? - No. 576 00:30:36,567 --> 00:30:40,471 It has to... There will be a town, a road... something. 577 00:30:42,942 --> 00:30:46,112 Unfortunately, to find salvation, 578 00:30:46,177 --> 00:30:50,249 we still had to climb more dunes. 579 00:30:50,316 --> 00:30:53,952 Climb them and then get down the other side. 580 00:30:54,019 --> 00:30:55,421 Oh, my God! 581 00:30:57,655 --> 00:30:59,191 Well, that's just a cliff! 582 00:31:01,059 --> 00:31:03,328 Whoa! Aargh! 583 00:31:10,001 --> 00:31:13,105 Whoa, this is a monster. 584 00:31:13,172 --> 00:31:16,674 Oh! I don't think I can do...! 585 00:31:16,741 --> 00:31:19,377 Whoa-ho-ho-ho! 586 00:31:24,450 --> 00:31:28,086 Whoa-a-a-a-a-a! 587 00:31:31,057 --> 00:31:32,324 Here we go. 588 00:31:32,391 --> 00:31:35,126 All three of us simultaneously... 589 00:31:38,964 --> 00:31:40,398 Holy shit. 590 00:31:40,465 --> 00:31:43,068 Oh-h-h-h, shit! 591 00:31:43,134 --> 00:31:46,438 Argh-hhh! Ha-ha! 592 00:31:46,505 --> 00:31:49,407 Whoa-a-a-a-a! 593 00:31:51,009 --> 00:31:52,344 I wasn't scared. 594 00:31:56,781 --> 00:31:58,217 Oh, my God. 595 00:31:58,284 --> 00:32:01,686 Guys, this is the biggest yet by a country mile. 596 00:32:03,689 --> 00:32:06,992 Whoa-a-a-a-a-a! 597 00:32:06,992 --> 00:32:08,460 Is that the size of the drop 598 00:32:08,527 --> 00:32:10,395 or what's happened to his penis? 599 00:32:13,332 --> 00:32:15,601 Right, then. Let's see what all the fuss is about. 600 00:32:15,666 --> 00:32:17,635 Holy shit! 601 00:32:21,073 --> 00:32:26,011 Oh-h-h-h-h! 602 00:32:28,880 --> 00:32:30,249 Phwoar. 603 00:32:30,316 --> 00:32:32,018 And now straighten those wheels, Richard, 604 00:32:32,050 --> 00:32:33,384 straighten them, 605 00:32:33,451 --> 00:32:35,020 because you've got to go down straight. 606 00:32:35,086 --> 00:32:39,157 Holy shit. Oh-h-h-h-h, shit! 607 00:32:39,224 --> 00:32:41,027 That is frightening. 608 00:32:46,798 --> 00:32:48,834 Love this desert. 609 00:32:48,900 --> 00:32:50,902 I'm never, ever, ever happier 610 00:32:51,037 --> 00:32:53,404 than I am when I'm in a desert. 611 00:32:53,471 --> 00:32:57,608 And this... this is the best desert I've ever been to. 612 00:33:00,246 --> 00:33:02,347 You can never really lose sight of the fact, though, 613 00:33:02,413 --> 00:33:04,049 that what it actually is 614 00:33:04,115 --> 00:33:08,487 is a big, orange killing engine. 615 00:33:08,554 --> 00:33:12,090 Now, a big crest's coming up. No idea. 616 00:33:12,157 --> 00:33:15,760 Gentle rolling hill or massive cliff? 617 00:33:15,826 --> 00:33:17,663 I don't know, Hammond! 618 00:33:17,729 --> 00:33:19,931 Hammond, seriously. 619 00:33:20,066 --> 00:33:21,833 Shit, he's gone. 620 00:33:21,900 --> 00:33:24,369 Hammond's gone, everyone. Hammond's gone. Big one. 621 00:33:28,640 --> 00:33:30,076 Oh, me. 622 00:33:36,815 --> 00:33:40,286 How the did you get down that? 623 00:33:41,720 --> 00:33:44,089 With my eyes shut! 624 00:33:44,123 --> 00:33:46,491 That was terrifying! 625 00:33:48,794 --> 00:33:51,096 Jesus! 626 00:33:59,204 --> 00:34:01,140 As we continued to head east, 627 00:34:01,207 --> 00:34:03,509 the terrain eventually levelled out... 628 00:34:07,679 --> 00:34:11,750 which meant we swapped terror for extreme discomfort. 629 00:34:14,753 --> 00:34:17,789 Ah. Oh, God Almighty. 630 00:34:17,856 --> 00:34:20,791 I don't think these cars were actually designed 631 00:34:20,858 --> 00:34:23,494 to take this much punishment. 632 00:34:23,561 --> 00:34:26,132 And I know we weren't. 633 00:34:26,164 --> 00:34:27,833 The only thing is, 634 00:34:27,898 --> 00:34:31,603 James's car rides lower than this and will be worse. 635 00:34:31,670 --> 00:34:34,606 Argh! Ow! 636 00:34:34,672 --> 00:34:36,407 Ow! Ow! Ow! 637 00:34:38,143 --> 00:34:40,311 Agh! 638 00:34:40,378 --> 00:34:42,414 Soon, the relentless battering 639 00:34:42,481 --> 00:34:45,150 started to cause breakdowns. 640 00:34:46,818 --> 00:34:49,920 Sand... Sand in gear shift. 641 00:34:49,987 --> 00:34:52,858 My throttle is jammed wide open, people. 642 00:35:03,434 --> 00:35:06,438 The problem is that every time the air filter, here, 643 00:35:06,505 --> 00:35:09,039 turns as I'm driving along-- which it does-- 644 00:35:09,175 --> 00:35:11,177 it's jamming the throttle. 645 00:35:14,480 --> 00:35:16,181 What's going on here? 646 00:35:17,782 --> 00:35:19,083 What's up? 647 00:35:19,184 --> 00:35:21,085 The throttle is now jamming 648 00:35:21,186 --> 00:35:22,688 fully open all the time. 649 00:35:22,753 --> 00:35:24,655 Oh, problem. 650 00:35:42,673 --> 00:35:43,775 Oh, God. 651 00:35:45,210 --> 00:35:49,447 It is still moving. 652 00:35:49,514 --> 00:35:51,550 Many miles ahead, 653 00:35:51,617 --> 00:35:54,652 we'd pulled over for a break from the endless bumps, 654 00:35:54,719 --> 00:35:57,688 and James was being very interesting! 655 00:36:01,059 --> 00:36:04,061 The good thing about this hat is you can angle it, like a heliostat, 656 00:36:04,128 --> 00:36:05,431 to where the sun's coming from. 657 00:36:05,496 --> 00:36:07,032 Yes, that's true. 658 00:36:07,097 --> 00:36:09,735 But you still look a tit. 659 00:36:09,800 --> 00:36:12,903 Luckily for Hammond, who could do with the company, 660 00:36:12,971 --> 00:36:15,641 I was back on the move. 661 00:36:15,706 --> 00:36:19,978 Right, a new style of driving is now required. 662 00:36:20,045 --> 00:36:24,081 This arm for steering, this arm for changing gear, 663 00:36:24,148 --> 00:36:29,019 and then another arm for deaccelerating, like so. 664 00:36:29,086 --> 00:36:31,021 Yes! 665 00:36:31,088 --> 00:36:32,724 Accelerate. 666 00:36:34,693 --> 00:36:36,527 Deaccelerate. 667 00:36:36,594 --> 00:36:38,996 Sometimes, if you listen very carefully, 668 00:36:39,063 --> 00:36:40,831 you can hear my genius. 669 00:36:43,134 --> 00:36:45,070 Back as a threesome, we continued 670 00:36:45,135 --> 00:36:49,541 with our seemingly endless journey to the east. 671 00:36:49,608 --> 00:36:52,744 Just need to find a road now. This is not funny any more. 672 00:36:52,811 --> 00:36:55,347 Enough desert. 673 00:36:55,414 --> 00:36:57,449 I don't want another night in the desert. 674 00:36:58,817 --> 00:37:01,619 I smell pretty bad. 675 00:37:01,686 --> 00:37:03,389 And I suspect that if we manage 676 00:37:03,454 --> 00:37:06,324 to find somewhere tonight near civilisation, 677 00:37:06,391 --> 00:37:08,293 we should probably have a ceremonial 678 00:37:08,360 --> 00:37:11,195 bonfire of the underpants. 679 00:37:11,297 --> 00:37:12,664 In truth, though, 680 00:37:12,731 --> 00:37:15,766 I thought we'd be in the desert forever. 681 00:37:15,833 --> 00:37:19,971 But then, late in the afternoon... 682 00:37:20,038 --> 00:37:25,577 I'm looking ahead, and I'm not seeing an endless sea of sand. 683 00:37:26,478 --> 00:37:28,414 I'm seeing green. 684 00:37:29,947 --> 00:37:32,717 Trees! Those are trees and shrubs! 685 00:37:37,623 --> 00:37:38,690 Pylons! 686 00:37:38,757 --> 00:37:41,327 Pylons! That means electricity. 687 00:37:45,630 --> 00:37:46,797 Oh, yes! 688 00:37:47,965 --> 00:37:49,501 Civilisation! 689 00:37:51,402 --> 00:37:54,005 And then, best of all... 690 00:37:55,773 --> 00:37:56,942 Oh, my God. 691 00:38:05,115 --> 00:38:07,918 I honestly thought we had another night of sleeping... 692 00:38:07,985 --> 00:38:09,554 ...in the sand. 693 00:38:09,621 --> 00:38:11,956 But, no! Look at it! 694 00:38:13,759 --> 00:38:15,760 Nicest thing I've ever seen. 695 00:38:19,364 --> 00:38:21,800 I could go east, I could go west... 696 00:38:21,867 --> 00:38:24,202 Whichever way you go, it goes somewhere. That's the point. 697 00:38:24,268 --> 00:38:26,036 It's a road, it goes somewhere. 698 00:38:26,103 --> 00:38:29,239 You know what we've just done, don't you? 699 00:38:29,375 --> 00:38:32,744 We've just crossed the Namib Desert in three beach buggies. 700 00:38:32,811 --> 00:38:34,144 - We have. - We did. 701 00:38:34,211 --> 00:38:36,014 We did. 702 00:38:36,081 --> 00:38:38,949 There is literally nothing can stop us now. 703 00:38:43,153 --> 00:38:44,755 Admittedly, 704 00:38:44,822 --> 00:38:48,059 our crossing had not exactly been as the crow flies, 705 00:38:48,126 --> 00:38:49,827 but we had found our road, 706 00:38:49,894 --> 00:38:52,063 and that's all that mattered. 707 00:38:53,164 --> 00:38:54,532 Oh, yes! 708 00:38:54,599 --> 00:38:56,668 That's the best thing I've ever seen! 709 00:38:56,735 --> 00:39:00,405 Yes, it is the road to freedom! 710 00:39:00,472 --> 00:39:02,840 What the hell was that? 711 00:39:05,309 --> 00:39:09,313 Something has just exploded at the back of my car. 712 00:39:09,414 --> 00:39:11,617 Oh, dear. 713 00:39:11,682 --> 00:39:14,052 By the time my colleagues had got back to me, 714 00:39:14,119 --> 00:39:16,922 I'd worked out what the problem was. 715 00:39:16,987 --> 00:39:19,157 It's really straightforward, OK? 716 00:39:19,224 --> 00:39:22,661 - The top bolt has come out of the shock absorber. - Right. 717 00:39:22,728 --> 00:39:26,264 It shot up, boinged into the coolant pipe, 718 00:39:26,331 --> 00:39:29,668 and three gallons of water have simply burst out, 719 00:39:29,735 --> 00:39:32,471 going everywhere except into the engine. 720 00:39:32,538 --> 00:39:36,273 - Right. - So all I've got to do is reattach the top bolt... 721 00:39:36,340 --> 00:39:40,846 mend the pipe and find three gallons of water... 722 00:39:40,911 --> 00:39:45,250 which I shall get from a passing motorist, and I'll be on my way. 723 00:39:45,315 --> 00:39:46,351 Right. 724 00:39:46,452 --> 00:39:47,585 All I could do with a hand with 725 00:39:47,652 --> 00:39:49,153 is just lifting the car up 726 00:39:49,219 --> 00:39:51,289 so I can reattach the, um... 727 00:39:51,356 --> 00:39:53,224 Yeah. Well, is there anybody here? 728 00:39:53,291 --> 00:39:55,893 - There's... - I suppose a motorist will pass eventually. 729 00:39:55,960 --> 00:39:58,630 The one that gives you water will also lift it up for you. 730 00:39:58,697 --> 00:40:00,465 You could just lift it up a little bit. 731 00:40:00,465 --> 00:40:02,400 Or we could go and have a beer. 732 00:40:02,400 --> 00:40:02,467 Or we could go and have a beer. - I hear traffic. - Yes. - We'd better not be here. 733 00:40:02,467 --> 00:40:04,335 - I hear traffic. - Yes. - We'd better not be here. 734 00:40:04,402 --> 00:40:06,438 We don't want to interfere when you're trying to talk 735 00:40:06,505 --> 00:40:08,005 'cause we might put them off. 736 00:40:13,277 --> 00:40:14,612 Right. 737 00:40:25,523 --> 00:40:29,795 Somewhere along here there will be a place, 738 00:40:29,860 --> 00:40:32,963 and that place will have a bar in it 739 00:40:33,030 --> 00:40:34,565 that will contain beer. 740 00:40:39,237 --> 00:40:40,505 Do you have any water? 741 00:40:40,572 --> 00:40:41,940 - Huh? - Water. 742 00:40:42,007 --> 00:40:44,242 Because the radiator has blown, 743 00:40:44,309 --> 00:40:45,911 so I need just three gallons. 744 00:40:45,976 --> 00:40:49,213 Look, you've got some water there. Just a bucket. 745 00:40:52,751 --> 00:40:55,621 It's an actual water lorry... 746 00:40:55,686 --> 00:40:58,489 leaking water, and he won't give me any. 747 00:41:02,960 --> 00:41:05,230 Eventually, I flagged down a local 748 00:41:05,295 --> 00:41:07,532 who had water to spare. 749 00:41:07,532 --> 00:41:09,568 Thank you. 750 00:41:09,635 --> 00:41:12,003 And then I got on with the repairs. 751 00:41:12,070 --> 00:41:16,641 That is one reassembled shock absorber. 752 00:41:16,708 --> 00:41:18,143 That's reattached, 753 00:41:18,208 --> 00:41:20,878 so that's the cooling system back in one piece. 754 00:41:25,115 --> 00:41:28,753 After an exhausting five-hour drive, 755 00:41:28,820 --> 00:41:31,322 Richard and I finally reached a town, 756 00:41:31,389 --> 00:41:35,760 which turned out to be Windhoek, 757 00:41:35,827 --> 00:41:38,829 and we too were taking on liquids. 758 00:41:55,480 --> 00:41:56,715 Mm. 759 00:42:04,054 --> 00:42:06,423 Back out on the highway, though, 760 00:42:06,490 --> 00:42:09,193 things weren't so good. 761 00:42:09,260 --> 00:42:13,798 What I'm driving here - or attempting to drive - is Apollo 13. 762 00:42:13,864 --> 00:42:15,365 There's some air trapped in the system 763 00:42:15,432 --> 00:42:18,603 and I've had to make a small hole in the front 764 00:42:18,670 --> 00:42:20,204 to get at the radiator. 765 00:42:20,271 --> 00:42:21,606 Bled that, 766 00:42:21,606 --> 00:42:23,340 bled all the stuff going into the engine. 767 00:42:23,407 --> 00:42:24,509 This is the header pipe. 768 00:42:24,610 --> 00:42:26,311 Everything is bled, and yet, 769 00:42:26,376 --> 00:42:28,813 you do a mile, it overheats. 770 00:42:28,880 --> 00:42:30,615 Another mile, overheats. 771 00:42:42,059 --> 00:42:46,331 Well, we've covered... 20 miles in four hours. 772 00:43:01,246 --> 00:43:06,384 This is the sixth time in 30 miles that's happened. 773 00:43:06,451 --> 00:43:09,387 Whilst my colleagues embraced beer and bed, 774 00:43:09,454 --> 00:43:13,123 I steeled myself for the longest, coldest, 775 00:43:13,190 --> 00:43:17,061 most frustrating night of my life. 776 00:43:22,668 --> 00:43:24,168 The roads are getting worse. 777 00:43:24,235 --> 00:43:26,672 Honestly, my bones are going to shatter. 778 00:43:26,704 --> 00:43:29,740 Oh, my God! 779 00:43:34,980 --> 00:43:38,784 - I've had a great idea. - Oh, no. 780 00:43:39,784 --> 00:43:41,820 Oh, shit, it's really high!