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<font color=#FF00FF>*THE GRAND TOUR*</font>
<font color=#00FF00>Season 01 Episode 10</font>
<font color=#FFFF00>"Dumb Fight at the O.K. Coral"</font>

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♪♪

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Thank you.

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Thank you.

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Hello, and welcome
to The Grand Tour,

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which this week
comes to you from Nashville!

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There it is.

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It was er... It's a city that
was named after General Nash.

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Big war hero,
kicked the British out.

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He got er...

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You ended up with independence. And
how's that working out for you?

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I only ask because we were
looking the other day at the

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 bestselling cars
in America these days.

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This is the top five.

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There you go, that's
independence... working well.

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Toyota, Honda, Toyota,
Nissan, Honda.

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So what is actually made
in Detroit these days, then?

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Er... Well, mostly they just grow
sustainable organic peace beans.

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- Oh! I mean, it's just women
with armpit hair growing kale.

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That's all
that's going on there...

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municipal farms
for the community.

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Now, the reason
we've come to Nashville

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is very simple, in fact.

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It's because I've been
to all 50 of the US states,

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but I'd never been here before.

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And what a town!

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Yeah.

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- Love it.
- Who knew?

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- We are loving it.
- Who knew?

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It is a great place,
we're loving it,

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and the music is amazing.

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Loving that... very much.

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- Well...
- What?

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- Not really.
- Mate, you can't...

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This is known as Music City USA.

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- That's what it is, where we are.
- Um, but it isn't, is it?

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Because Detroit is.

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Oh, no. Listen... No.

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It is.

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Motown... Motown

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is just three minutes
of jangly nonsense.

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- Oh, come on, Hammond!
- It is!

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Hammond, it just isn't!

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You cannot possibly say that.

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Country and western music

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is designed
to make you miserable.

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Motown is designed
to make you happy.

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No, he's absolutely right.
Motown is happier music.

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I mean, take something like

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Martha Reeves
"Dancing In The Streets", OK?

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Listen to how happy
the words are.

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"Every guy, grab a girl,
everywhere around the world."

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Isn't that what Donald
was telling us to do?

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Well, he was, wasn't he?
He did. He did.

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No, he said,
"Every guy, grope a girl."

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A very different thing.

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Detroit isn't just Motown.
Bob Seger's from Detroit.

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It's just housewives' music.

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- Ted Nugent
- Mad!

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- Iggy Pop.
- Ridiculous.

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- Madonna.
- Annoying.

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- Eminem.
- Can't sing.

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- Alice Cooper.
- Ridiculous again.

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- Half of The Eagles.
- Which half?

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- Glenn Frey.
- I don't like that half.

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Nashville. Right, what's come
out of here? Miley Cyrus.

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Brilliant!

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- You just said that out loud on television.
- I did.

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And...
And The Allman Brothers.

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Never heard of them.

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You have.

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The Allman Brothers,

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they had that one hit,
instrumental.

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- What was it called?
- Jessica.

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Jennifer.

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Oh, I hated that.

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You never hear it
any more, do you?

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No. Rubbish.

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Weirdest thing.

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Weirdest thing.

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- Oh, hello.
- A message.

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Oh, sorry.

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This is a message
from Mr Wilman.

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We've gone a bit off topic.

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He might be cross.
We have a bit.

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There is a car thing here
we ought to talk about.

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It's called coal rolling.
Are you familiar with this?

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It has its origins in a sport

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where people go with their
pickup trucks into a field

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and see who can tow
the heaviest thing.

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- Yep. Oh, yep.
- We've got some footage here of it happening.

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Look at that! The man in a pickup
truck towing a heavy thing.

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There you go.

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Things you will never hear
said at that event:

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"Got to rush, lads. I'm
late for a poetry reading."

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That's truck number three...

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Bernie Sanders, everybody.

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Anyway, the thing is,
they worked out

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they could pull
more heavy things

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if they fiddled with the ECU
on the diesel engines,

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because that would
generate more power,

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and, as a by-product,
more smoke,

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cos that's why it's
called coal rolling.

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And now, various kids have started
to do it out on the highway.

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What they do is go
out on the street

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and then do it when they
overtake a Toyota Prius.

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Look at this. Here we go.

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Oh, for God's sake!
Really?! Oh, come on!

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Really?!

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- Now, I...
- That's just...

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I just... I know,
I know I shouldn't say this.

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But every time
I overtake a Prius,

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I always think,
"I could do this in fourth...

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"but I'm gonna use
second instead

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to annoy them even more."

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You do know
you are 56 years old?

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- Yeah, but I've got a mental age of nine.
- Oh, yeah.

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- Shall we get on with the show?
- Yeah, it's time.

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On with the show.
In our car show this week...

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James runs over a sun lounger.

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Richard has a beer.

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And I go on a thing.

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Jesus!

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Anyway, before all that,

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we've been having
a bit of a debate.

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You see, I say you don't
need to buy a BMW M3

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because for £11,000 less
you can have a Jaguar XE S,

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which is nicer to drive,

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more comfortable
and just as fast.

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- It isn't just as fast.
- Yes, it is.

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- No, it isn't.
- They both do 155mph.

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Yes, because the BMW has been
electronically limited to 155.

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The Jag is just... limited.

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Sorry to interrupt.

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It's just that both my
colleagues are wrong.

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Because if you want a small,
fast saloon car,

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what you absolutely
have to have...

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If you're gonna start going on

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about that Alfa Romeo
Giulia Quadrifoglio,

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I am gonna stab you
in the eye with this pen.

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- No, he's...
- A number of times.

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He's right. Alfa Romeo
have not made a decent car

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for 30 years.

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- Erm...
- "Erm" nothing,

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because we need to get
back to the point.

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James and I have decided

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it was time to sort out
this Jaguar-BMW debate

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with a proper old-school
road test in Scotland.

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Hello, and welcome to Wales,

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where I've come with all of
our film crews and this,

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the brand-new Alfa Romeo
Giulia... Quadrifoglio.

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I think.

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Whatever.

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Let's get on now
and see what's what.

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Now, for this to be
a proper Alfa Romeo,

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there must be...
something wrong with it.

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Think about it.

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A person
who's kind to his mother

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and punctual and sober and
well-dressed, he's an Audi.

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And nobody
wants a friend like that.

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If you're going to form
a relationship with a car,

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if you're gonna develop a bond,

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it's got to have
human qualities.

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And if it's gonna have
human qualities,

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it's got to have faults.

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And this car, I'm delighted
to say, has a big one.

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I don't know quite how
they've managed this,

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but it's not very easy
to get out of.

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You've got this pillar here,
then the wheel here,

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and there isn't enough of a...

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of a gap between the two.

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Hang on a minute. Hang on.

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How Alfa Romeo is that?

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They put the door in the
wrong place. It should be...

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It should be further back.

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That is brilliant.

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♪♪

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There's more, too.

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It's not a particularly
handsome car.

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The wheels are too small.

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And for some reason,

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they've chosen to make the front

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look like a Wolseley.

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Now, in the recent past...
James is quite right...

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Alfas have had their faults

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and then no good bits
to compensate.

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They've just been
wrong-wheel-drive Fiats

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with the word "Fiat" crossed out

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and "Alfa Romeo"
written in in crayon.

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That, though...

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that's a very different animal.

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♪♪

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♪♪

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♪♪

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♪♪

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♪♪

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♪♪

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♪♪

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This is a fabulous car,

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an epic car.

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Probably
because it's the love child

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00:09:42,993 --> 00:09:47,431
of the same man who
engineered the Ferrari 458.

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00:09:51,341 --> 00:09:54,662
♪♪

210
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He's given it
a carbon-fibre propshaft,

211
00:09:58,240 --> 00:10:00,373
a carbon-fibre roof,

212
00:10:00,441 --> 00:10:02,270
a carbon-fibre bonnet,

213
00:10:02,373 --> 00:10:04,919
a proper limited-slip
differential,

214
00:10:05,020 --> 00:10:08,567
telepathic steering
and a clever gearbox.

215
00:10:08,669 --> 00:10:11,153
But the most impressive bit
of this car

216
00:10:11,255 --> 00:10:15,860
is its turbocharged
2.9L V6 engine.

217
00:10:17,684 --> 00:10:21,662
An engine that wobbles
when you close the door.

218
00:10:21,832 --> 00:10:24,268
That is brilliant. Look at that.

219
00:10:24,389 --> 00:10:27,833
You don't get that sort of
thing from an Audi, do you?

220
00:10:28,263 --> 00:10:29,793
Ferrari, which, of course,

221
00:10:29,893 --> 00:10:31,927
is part of the same company
as Alfa Romeo,

222
00:10:32,009 --> 00:10:33,826
is very keen to point out

223
00:10:33,878 --> 00:10:37,403
that this is not the engine
they use in the California

224
00:10:37,559 --> 00:10:39,515
with two cylinders removed.

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00:10:39,669 --> 00:10:41,481
They say
it's a complete coincidence

226
00:10:41,559 --> 00:10:45,028
that both engines have the
same bore/stroke and V-angle.

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00:10:45,153 --> 00:10:49,724
They're adamant that this is
all Alfa Romeo's own work.

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00:10:50,019 --> 00:10:51,802
So, there we are.

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It is, then.

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00:10:57,869 --> 00:11:00,615
And what work it is.

231
00:11:00,754 --> 00:11:05,523
You get 503 brake horsepower.

232
00:11:05,910 --> 00:11:11,490
That is 60 more than you get
from a BMW M3. 60!

233
00:11:14,745 --> 00:11:17,317
It's 175 more

234
00:11:17,395 --> 00:11:18,778
than you get from that Jag

235
00:11:18,813 --> 00:11:21,434
that James would be
droning on about now,

236
00:11:21,481 --> 00:11:24,966
had I not stepped in
and saved the day.

237
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And then there's
the way it revs.

238
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Ha!

239
00:11:36,956 --> 00:11:40,941
Most turbocharged engines are
a bit wheezy at the top end,

240
00:11:41,025 --> 00:11:44,331
but because
the twin-scroll turbo in this

241
00:11:44,418 --> 00:11:47,510
is mounted in the V
of the engine...

242
00:11:48,010 --> 00:11:50,453
just like it is
in a Ferrari California,

243
00:11:50,527 --> 00:11:51,924
coincidentally,

244
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the rev counter is still a blur

245
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right up to the red zone.

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00:12:15,913 --> 00:12:17,615
This engine is...

247
00:12:19,051 --> 00:12:20,837
it's a masterpiece.

248
00:12:20,951 --> 00:12:23,025
An absolute gem.

249
00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:28,393
So, while this may
look like a Wolseley,

250
00:12:28,456 --> 00:12:30,533
it certainly doesn't
go like one.

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00:12:32,962 --> 00:12:38,643
It has a top speed,
in fact, of 191mph.

252
00:12:40,649 --> 00:12:42,783
What this car is

253
00:12:42,870 --> 00:12:44,706
is a Ferrari...

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00:12:45,490 --> 00:12:48,206
wearing
four-door sensi-panties.

255
00:12:49,837 --> 00:12:54,850
And that brings me onto
this car's party piece.

256
00:12:55,025 --> 00:12:58,792
At normal speeds, it's very
quiet and very civilised.

257
00:12:59,001 --> 00:13:00,923
And even though
it's running on wheels

258
00:13:01,033 --> 00:13:03,860
that appear to have come off
the bottom of a sofa,

259
00:13:03,962 --> 00:13:05,129
it's very comfortable,

260
00:13:05,153 --> 00:13:06,548
even if you push this,

261
00:13:06,596 --> 00:13:09,072
you put it in
bumpy-suspension mode.

262
00:13:11,604 --> 00:13:13,870
The only setting
I haven't yet tried

263
00:13:13,940 --> 00:13:16,042
is this one... "race".

264
00:13:16,974 --> 00:13:18,283
But I think I should.

265
00:13:18,346 --> 00:13:19,384
Sadly, however,

266
00:13:19,452 --> 00:13:21,721
before I found somewhere
to try it out,

267
00:13:22,013 --> 00:13:24,768
I received a telephone call.

268
00:13:30,121 --> 00:13:32,557
Oh, no. What?

269
00:13:32,837 --> 00:13:35,601
Have you got our film crew somewhere?

270
00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:39,438
- Yes, I have.
- Are you using them to film an Alfa?

271
00:13:39,620 --> 00:13:41,393
- Yes, I am.
- Where are you?

272
00:13:41,479 --> 00:13:43,518
- Wales.
- Wales?!

273
00:13:43,634 --> 00:13:45,721
You can't just arrange
that we go to Scotland

274
00:13:45,783 --> 00:13:47,245
and then disappear off to Wales.

275
00:13:47,283 --> 00:13:48,792
I didn't tell you
to go to Scotland.

276
00:13:48,893 --> 00:13:50,979
You decided to go
to Scotland on your own.

277
00:13:52,440 --> 00:13:53,799
We've come
all the way to Scotland

278
00:13:53,823 --> 00:13:55,581
to do this with these two cars.

279
00:13:55,647 --> 00:13:58,384
This is the test.
You trying to shoehorn...

280
00:13:58,643 --> 00:14:00,587
It's wonderful there are
Alfa Romeos in the world.

281
00:14:00,611 --> 00:14:02,643
That's a lovely thing
that we can all...

282
00:14:02,712 --> 00:14:04,131
It doesn't matter
how good you think

283
00:14:04,155 --> 00:14:06,111
the Alfa Romeo is.
This is a car programme.

284
00:14:06,158 --> 00:14:08,759
Concepts, dreams,
imagining things.

285
00:14:08,822 --> 00:14:11,337
Scotland, with two cars
that are credible, relevant,

286
00:14:11,447 --> 00:14:13,221
important, work and are real.

287
00:14:13,292 --> 00:14:15,604
They were still
shouting at me as I arrived

288
00:14:15,667 --> 00:14:18,120
with all of the film crews
at our track.

289
00:14:18,169 --> 00:14:19,936
Itch, that
you've managed to scratch

290
00:14:19,937 --> 00:14:21,120
over the last ten years.

291
00:14:21,173 --> 00:14:22,799
I don't know how. Why...

292
00:14:22,932 --> 00:14:24,533
It's breaking up!

293
00:14:24,557 --> 00:14:26,986
Oh, I've lost you!

294
00:14:33,232 --> 00:14:35,235
Race mode.

295
00:14:37,033 --> 00:14:39,370
Here we go.

296
00:14:50,383 --> 00:14:53,755
In race mode, everything
is in a tensed-up state:

297
00:14:53,834 --> 00:14:56,880
the throttle response,
the gearbox, the steering.

298
00:14:57,014 --> 00:15:00,451
And the traction control is off!

299
00:15:20,697 --> 00:15:22,587
This has now been transformed

300
00:15:22,673 --> 00:15:24,533
from something
that was brilliant...

301
00:15:24,932 --> 00:15:28,408
into something
that is sensational.

302
00:15:37,611 --> 00:15:41,861
Of course, you'd never drive
in race mode on the road,

303
00:15:41,971 --> 00:15:45,611
in the same way you'd never take
your wristwatch into space.

304
00:15:45,807 --> 00:15:51,376
But it's nice to know that it
would still work if you did.

305
00:15:52,144 --> 00:15:53,563
And this does.

306
00:15:53,643 --> 00:15:55,923
Oh, boy, this does.

307
00:15:59,915 --> 00:16:03,337
I've always said you can't
be a true petrolhead

308
00:16:03,416 --> 00:16:06,212
until you've owned
an Alfa Romeo.

309
00:16:06,322 --> 00:16:08,120
And the trouble is,
I've always known

310
00:16:08,173 --> 00:16:09,697
there's no Alfa Romeo

311
00:16:09,775 --> 00:16:13,009
a true petrolhead
would actually want to buy.

312
00:16:13,884 --> 00:16:15,152
There is now, though.

313
00:16:15,200 --> 00:16:17,302
Oh, there is now.

314
00:16:30,626 --> 00:16:33,807
And so I decided to do
something I've never done

315
00:16:33,869 --> 00:16:37,290
with any car I've ever
filmed in my entire life.

316
00:16:37,403 --> 00:16:39,423
I decided,
when the test was over,

317
00:16:39,509 --> 00:16:42,587
to go to the nearest
Alfa Romeo dealer...

318
00:16:43,205 --> 00:16:44,815
and buy one.

319
00:17:05,806 --> 00:17:07,107
What?

320
00:17:12,009 --> 00:17:15,479
- What?
- You total cock.

321
00:17:15,528 --> 00:17:17,079
You stole our film.

322
00:17:17,153 --> 00:17:18,761
Well, not really.

323
00:17:18,911 --> 00:17:20,747
You didn't actually buy one,
did you?

324
00:17:20,852 --> 00:17:22,622
Well, no, cos I couldn't
make my mind up

325
00:17:22,676 --> 00:17:23,817
between that and the 4C.

326
00:17:23,880 --> 00:17:26,192
And it was great. It was like
watching an ape return to its cage

327
00:17:26,215 --> 00:17:28,886
and finding there was
an apple and a banana.

328
00:17:28,958 --> 00:17:31,362
"Oh, I like apple,
but I like bananas.

329
00:17:31,419 --> 00:17:33,529
So do I want the apple
or a banana?"

330
00:17:33,575 --> 00:17:34,910
You would
have had both, obviously.

331
00:17:34,933 --> 00:17:36,411
Hammond, that car is brilliant,

332
00:17:36,458 --> 00:17:38,558
and it only costs £60,000.

333
00:17:38,730 --> 00:17:40,800
Yeah, but honestly, Jeremy,
that doesn't mean anything.

334
00:17:40,825 --> 00:17:42,450
If Alfa Romeo
launched a dog turd,

335
00:17:42,505 --> 00:17:43,426
you'd say it was brilliant.

336
00:17:43,465 --> 00:17:45,472
It is! I'm not making it up!

337
00:17:45,519 --> 00:17:48,511
You heard it. You saw it.
It's a fantastic car.

338
00:17:48,622 --> 00:17:49,980
Anyway, listen, we must find out

339
00:17:50,036 --> 00:17:54,684
how fast the Quadri-thingy
goes round the Eboladrome.

340
00:17:54,699 --> 00:17:56,089
That, of course,
means handing it over

341
00:17:56,114 --> 00:17:58,521
to a man who thinks
that tennis is something

342
00:17:58,583 --> 00:18:00,840
that was invented by Stalin.

343
00:18:01,130 --> 00:18:03,075
He's actually
a local boy this week,

344
00:18:03,176 --> 00:18:04,278
from the next state along.

345
00:18:04,333 --> 00:18:06,261
It's the American!

346
00:18:09,182 --> 00:18:10,315
There he is.

347
00:18:10,385 --> 00:18:11,622
And even he will enjoy

348
00:18:11,670 --> 00:18:13,270
this magnificent machine,

349
00:18:13,357 --> 00:18:14,761
I'm sure of that.

350
00:18:14,840 --> 00:18:17,153
And he's off
with a glorious bark

351
00:18:17,208 --> 00:18:20,090
and a pop
from that sensational V6.

352
00:18:20,144 --> 00:18:21,255
Oh, it's wet!

353
00:18:21,319 --> 00:18:26,074
OK. Alfa Romeo Julie Quad Bike

354
00:18:26,192 --> 00:18:27,442
something or another.

355
00:18:27,519 --> 00:18:30,364
I can't say it,
can't pronounce it.

356
00:18:30,785 --> 00:18:32,730
I don't really like driving it.

357
00:18:33,089 --> 00:18:34,991
Oh, for God's sake!

358
00:18:36,176 --> 00:18:39,489
So, the tall one thinks
this is a good car.

359
00:18:39,778 --> 00:18:43,032
I still think he was dropped
on his head as a child.

360
00:18:43,222 --> 00:18:46,301
Yeah, but at least I don't
wear a cowboy hat to weddings.

361
00:18:46,442 --> 00:18:50,090
Right, now, powering majestically
into Your Name Here.

362
00:18:50,167 --> 00:18:53,160
This could be the single
greatest lap we'll ever see.

363
00:18:53,239 --> 00:18:54,683
See, what are you on about?

364
00:18:54,747 --> 00:18:55,817
It's
beautifully balanced,

365
00:18:55,840 --> 00:18:57,153
hard on the power.

366
00:18:57,278 --> 00:18:59,355
A bit of a wobble there!
Some oversteer,

367
00:18:59,411 --> 00:19:00,394
but it was designed to do that.

368
00:19:00,420 --> 00:19:01,420
No, it wasn't!

369
00:19:01,465 --> 00:19:02,490
Stop saying
things, Hammond.

370
00:19:02,513 --> 00:19:03,840
I'm busy.

371
00:19:04,536 --> 00:19:06,036
This is just a BMW

372
00:19:06,098 --> 00:19:08,317
for people
who like fancy coffee.

373
00:19:08,544 --> 00:19:11,928
No, it's a BMW for people
with taste and discernment.

374
00:19:12,044 --> 00:19:13,739
No, it's a BMW for idiots.

375
00:19:13,809 --> 00:19:14,801
Hammond, be quiet!

376
00:19:14,832 --> 00:19:16,270
Look at the way it's dealing

377
00:19:16,333 --> 00:19:18,167
with Old Lady's House.

378
00:19:18,169 --> 00:19:19,811
Almost no problems at all.

379
00:19:20,010 --> 00:19:21,402
Now he can really turn it up

380
00:19:21,472 --> 00:19:22,673
for the sprint to Substation.

381
00:19:22,673 --> 00:19:25,034
Such power! Such pedigree!

382
00:19:25,080 --> 00:19:27,502
- Such bollocks.
- Just be quiet!

383
00:19:27,574 --> 00:19:29,244
Just two corners left.

384
00:19:29,362 --> 00:19:31,916
Glorious poise in the rain
through there.

385
00:19:31,982 --> 00:19:33,199
Field Of Sheep.

386
00:19:33,291 --> 00:19:35,541
Another master class
in suspension control.

387
00:19:35,605 --> 00:19:36,920
And across the line!

388
00:19:39,238 --> 00:19:41,724
- Well, come on, then.
- Well, no...

389
00:19:41,807 --> 00:19:43,259
Come on. What did it do?

390
00:19:43,316 --> 00:19:44,971
- What?
- Time.

391
00:19:45,061 --> 00:19:46,738
No, it was wet,

392
00:19:46,838 --> 00:19:48,627
so there's no point
putting it on the board.

393
00:19:48,674 --> 00:19:49,933
It'll just wear the computer out

394
00:19:49,958 --> 00:19:51,535
- for no reason.
- Get on with it!

395
00:19:51,559 --> 00:19:53,314
- We haven't got time! But I' not able...
- Get on with it!

396
00:19:53,337 --> 00:19:54,957
All right, I'm gonna do it.
Let's look at the time.

397
00:19:54,980 --> 00:19:58,596
There we go. Time for Jeremy's
Alfa Quadriplogio.

398
00:20:00,682 --> 00:20:02,377
- That's not quick, mate!
- I'm sorry.

399
00:20:02,378 --> 00:20:03,402
That's rubbish!

400
00:20:03,463 --> 00:20:05,949
In the dry,
it would have done a 1:15.

401
00:20:05,950 --> 00:20:07,605
- No, it wouldn't.
- Yes, it would.

402
00:20:07,674 --> 00:20:08,919
- No, it wouldn't.
- It would!

403
00:20:09,032 --> 00:20:10,650
There's no point arguing anyway.

404
00:20:10,674 --> 00:20:12,448
He's got the Alfa Romeo
thing out of his system,

405
00:20:12,471 --> 00:20:14,400
which is good,
because it's time now

406
00:20:14,424 --> 00:20:15,932
for us to enjoy a gentle stroll

407
00:20:15,983 --> 00:20:19,409
along the sunlit sidewalks
of Conversation Street.

408
00:20:22,878 --> 00:20:25,035
♪♪

409
00:20:28,791 --> 00:20:30,807
- That's a good one.
- I like that one.

410
00:20:30,916 --> 00:20:32,355
It is. Right, now...

411
00:20:34,546 --> 00:20:36,646
OK. And we start with this.

412
00:20:36,777 --> 00:20:38,885
It's the new Alfa Romeo Stelvio.

413
00:20:38,955 --> 00:20:42,221
- For God's sake!
- This is important news.

414
00:20:42,305 --> 00:20:45,531
It's not important news.
It's niche news for morons.

415
00:20:45,532 --> 00:20:47,634
It's not!
It's a superb car,

416
00:20:47,692 --> 00:20:49,025
because you can have it

417
00:20:49,079 --> 00:20:50,869
with the same
500 horsepower engine

418
00:20:50,923 --> 00:20:52,650
that you get
in the Quadriplegio.

419
00:20:52,704 --> 00:20:55,731
And with that... with that
you get four-wheel-drive.

420
00:20:55,767 --> 00:20:58,067
So that one will work
in the wet, will it?

421
00:20:58,267 --> 00:21:00,782
Hammond,
when somebody has a baby,

422
00:21:00,900 --> 00:21:02,173
OK, do you go up to it and...

423
00:21:02,212 --> 00:21:03,689
"Oh, look at my new
baby that I've...

424
00:21:03,767 --> 00:21:05,208
Eurgh! It's really ugly!"

425
00:21:05,209 --> 00:21:07,210
Well, only if it's ugly.

426
00:21:07,480 --> 00:21:10,269
You see, you can't be cruel
about Alfa Romeos.

427
00:21:10,582 --> 00:21:12,083
- Yes, I can.
- They're trying so hard!

428
00:21:12,106 --> 00:21:14,846
Well, let's just move it on.
Forget the Alfa, then.

429
00:21:14,957 --> 00:21:17,371
Now, we should talk
about where we are,

430
00:21:17,449 --> 00:21:21,457
OK, Tennessee, because this is the
bestselling vehicle in the state.

431
00:21:21,510 --> 00:21:22,955
OK.

432
00:21:23,902 --> 00:21:26,395
Yeah, we've got a picture
of the police car.

433
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:29,105
And an ambulance.

434
00:21:29,230 --> 00:21:31,167
- And a hearse.
- Yeah.

435
00:21:31,207 --> 00:21:34,136
I'm detecting...
detecting a theme here.

436
00:21:34,137 --> 00:21:35,905
The pickup truck,
I think I'm right,

437
00:21:35,906 --> 00:21:38,173
is very popular in this
neck of the woods, yes?

438
00:21:38,174 --> 00:21:40,143
I'm sure you may
be amazed to hear

439
00:21:40,144 --> 00:21:42,613
they really haven't
caught on at all in the UK.

440
00:21:42,614 --> 00:21:44,247
I mean, almost nobody has one.

441
00:21:44,248 --> 00:21:45,915
You hardly see them,
which is a shame,

442
00:21:45,916 --> 00:21:47,651
because I love a pickup truck.

443
00:21:47,652 --> 00:21:49,619
- Yeah, we know.
- I like a truck.

444
00:21:49,621 --> 00:21:50,921
- You know?
- Yes.

445
00:21:50,922 --> 00:21:53,630
I can say that here.
I can say that here.

446
00:21:53,714 --> 00:21:57,066
That's fine, you can say that, but not
they're actually very sensible. All right.

447
00:21:57,105 --> 00:21:58,253
Look, mate,
that's not everything.

448
00:21:58,278 --> 00:21:59,933
Anyway, you drive around
in your Ferrari, OK,

449
00:21:59,958 --> 00:22:02,403
and happily put up with the
compromises that that imposes.

450
00:22:02,497 --> 00:22:04,500
So you put up with the cost,
the inconvenience,

451
00:22:04,500 --> 00:22:07,037
and it's not very comfortable
because it's a fast car.

452
00:22:07,200 --> 00:22:09,347
Same with a pickup.
You put up with compromises:

453
00:22:09,373 --> 00:22:11,442
the weight, the size,
the fuel consumption...

454
00:22:11,491 --> 00:22:12,792
But what's the upside?

455
00:22:12,872 --> 00:22:14,551
It's a pickup truck!
You can use it...

456
00:22:14,598 --> 00:22:16,058
You can put logs in it

457
00:22:16,130 --> 00:22:18,855
and tow... tow trees
out of the woods with it.

458
00:22:18,894 --> 00:22:20,215
You could put a bear in it.

459
00:22:20,240 --> 00:22:23,219
Hammond, you work...
you work in the media!

460
00:22:23,220 --> 00:22:25,089
The only thing you have to
put in the back of a vehicle

461
00:22:25,114 --> 00:22:27,557
are invitations to gala lunches.

462
00:22:27,653 --> 00:22:28,950
- Well...
- That's all you ever do.

463
00:22:28,973 --> 00:22:30,387
The problem,
actually, in Britain

464
00:22:30,458 --> 00:22:32,162
with a pickup truck...
I'm sorry to admit this...

465
00:22:32,163 --> 00:22:35,230
is that if you pulled up
at a set of traffic lights

466
00:22:35,261 --> 00:22:36,785
and you had your cement mixer

467
00:22:36,864 --> 00:22:38,183
and your chainsaw in the back,

468
00:22:38,269 --> 00:22:40,614
they would be stolen
immediately.

469
00:22:41,058 --> 00:22:42,519
Anything left
in the open in Britain,

470
00:22:42,558 --> 00:22:45,489
it's like nuts at a party,
you just help yourself.

471
00:22:45,919 --> 00:22:47,458
- So why
doesn't that happen here?

472
00:22:47,598 --> 00:22:49,179
Who's got a pickup truck here?

473
00:22:49,286 --> 00:22:51,598
Holy cow! That's unbelievable.

474
00:22:51,801 --> 00:22:53,911
When you go shopping
and put things in the back,

475
00:22:53,951 --> 00:22:56,075
why doesn't someone
just help themselves?

476
00:22:56,239 --> 00:22:57,788
Because they shoot them here.

477
00:22:59,114 --> 00:23:01,692
Well, there is that.

478
00:23:01,717 --> 00:23:06,128
There is that.
Thank you, Donald!

479
00:23:06,286 --> 00:23:08,528
But why... Have you ever
had anything stolen

480
00:23:08,567 --> 00:23:09,676
when you were at a red light?

481
00:23:09,701 --> 00:23:11,567
Never? Has anyone
ever had anything...?

482
00:23:11,817 --> 00:23:13,269
- No.
- No?

483
00:23:13,348 --> 00:23:14,528
I thought this was
supposed to be

484
00:23:14,551 --> 00:23:16,497
crime-ridden in America.

485
00:23:16,606 --> 00:23:17,807
Maybe people are honest.

486
00:23:17,872 --> 00:23:18,855
I don't know, it's possible.

487
00:23:18,891 --> 00:23:20,044
If I was in Britain

488
00:23:20,096 --> 00:23:21,481
and saw a pickup truck
with a lawnmower,

489
00:23:21,506 --> 00:23:22,807
"I'll have that."

490
00:23:24,214 --> 00:23:27,637
Now, yesterday we went to erm...

491
00:23:27,719 --> 00:23:29,801
It was like a big
classic-car museum,

492
00:23:29,872 --> 00:23:32,551
just out of town here, where you
could also buy the exhibits.

493
00:23:32,630 --> 00:23:34,880
- It's great fun.
- It was a fantastic day out.

494
00:23:34,950 --> 00:23:36,036
Really enjoyed ourselves
in there.

495
00:23:36,059 --> 00:23:37,334
I mean, it was full
of, you know,

496
00:23:37,357 --> 00:23:39,128
Mustangs and Camaros and stuff.

497
00:23:39,130 --> 00:23:40,481
Stuff like this.
We've got a picture

498
00:23:40,506 --> 00:23:42,615
of this sort of thing...
'60s and '70s stuff.

499
00:23:42,748 --> 00:23:46,375
Now, we know that cars like
this are horrible to drive.

500
00:23:46,401 --> 00:23:48,878
Terrible. But they're
tremendous to look at.

501
00:23:48,933 --> 00:23:52,574
There was so much joy
in car design back then,

502
00:23:52,608 --> 00:23:54,410
and you see it
in that car there.

503
00:23:54,583 --> 00:23:56,761
It actually made us slightly
sad in a way, though,

504
00:23:56,825 --> 00:23:59,114
because as we were leaving, we
suddenly started wondering,

505
00:23:59,183 --> 00:24:01,308
"Well, what are they gonna
put in that museum

506
00:24:01,410 --> 00:24:02,424
in 40 years' time?"

507
00:24:02,459 --> 00:24:03,400
- Yeah.
- What?

508
00:24:03,424 --> 00:24:04,796
The Nissan-bloody-Juke.

509
00:24:04,882 --> 00:24:05,804
Exactly.

510
00:24:05,866 --> 00:24:08,050
I don't want to look
at that now.

511
00:24:08,084 --> 00:24:10,326
No, exactly. Or the Dodge Dart.

512
00:24:10,425 --> 00:24:13,287
Well, what child's gonna
say, "Oh, Daddy!"

513
00:24:13,334 --> 00:24:16,559
Daddy, let's go and look at the
40-year-old Dart in the museum"?

514
00:24:16,701 --> 00:24:17,912
Nobody is!

515
00:24:17,942 --> 00:24:19,248
It's true that car design

516
00:24:19,272 --> 00:24:20,536
has become so dreary lately.

517
00:24:20,636 --> 00:24:22,018
And I think part of it,

518
00:24:22,063 --> 00:24:23,987
it's almost as if
the people who design cars

519
00:24:24,064 --> 00:24:25,612
don't actually like
cars that much.

520
00:24:25,682 --> 00:24:27,515
Exactly. But they did then.
You can tell.

521
00:24:27,546 --> 00:24:30,205
There was a Cuda in there
next to a Plymouth Fury,

522
00:24:30,270 --> 00:24:33,093
and I just stood for about an
hour, just soaking them in.

523
00:24:33,202 --> 00:24:35,877
I saw a 1966 Cadillac.

524
00:24:35,943 --> 00:24:37,519
We've got a picture
of it here. Look.

525
00:24:37,644 --> 00:24:39,244
Now, what I like about this

526
00:24:39,354 --> 00:24:41,182
is that the bloke
who designed the bonnet,

527
00:24:41,222 --> 00:24:43,058
he... the grill. "I've finished
with the bonnet."

528
00:24:43,083 --> 00:24:43,791
I'll do the grill."

529
00:24:43,817 --> 00:24:45,460
But he didn't tell
the blokes doing the wings,

530
00:24:45,483 --> 00:24:48,596
and they kept going, so it
goes like another foot.

531
00:24:48,705 --> 00:24:51,166
No, but this is fantastic
with a fantastic-looking car.

532
00:24:51,213 --> 00:24:53,269
The Buick Riviera, they had
one of those in there.

533
00:24:53,320 --> 00:24:55,096
- Look at that!
- That is glorious!

534
00:24:55,159 --> 00:24:56,172
I had one of those

535
00:24:56,221 --> 00:24:57,605
as a toy when I was little.

536
00:24:57,630 --> 00:24:59,480
If you put your finger
over the back window,

537
00:24:59,542 --> 00:25:01,112
it flashed its lights.

538
00:25:01,278 --> 00:25:02,557
And you just look and you go,

539
00:25:02,611 --> 00:25:05,174
"How can Buick have gone
from doing that

540
00:25:05,259 --> 00:25:07,260
"in, what, 30-40 years,
to doing this,

541
00:25:07,286 --> 00:25:09,112
whatever this brown..."
Look at...

542
00:25:09,644 --> 00:25:10,807
How have they done that?!

543
00:25:10,941 --> 00:25:12,480
And it's the same as Chevrolet.

544
00:25:12,534 --> 00:25:14,599
There was an Impala
in there, 1960.

545
00:25:14,625 --> 00:25:17,192
Look at that!
That is exciting not moving!

546
00:25:17,230 --> 00:25:19,487
That's a Chevy
Impala from the '60s.

547
00:25:19,557 --> 00:25:21,166
Let's have a look at one
from today.

548
00:25:21,252 --> 00:25:22,712
Oh, for God's sake!

549
00:25:22,924 --> 00:25:25,042
How do they even have the
nerve to call that an Impala?

550
00:25:25,067 --> 00:25:25,934
Because it isn't one.

551
00:25:25,960 --> 00:25:27,885
I was looking at a Corvette,

552
00:25:27,939 --> 00:25:28,987
a '70s Corvette.

553
00:25:29,038 --> 00:25:30,137
That's the C3 model,

554
00:25:30,163 --> 00:25:31,307
if you're a Corvette nerd.

555
00:25:31,333 --> 00:25:32,567
This was a car that was driven

556
00:25:32,630 --> 00:25:34,278
by all of the astronauts.

557
00:25:34,411 --> 00:25:36,846
- Exactly.
- And Dirk Diggler.

558
00:25:36,973 --> 00:25:38,114
Yep.

559
00:25:38,176 --> 00:25:39,825
Ah, so it's a car

560
00:25:39,851 --> 00:25:41,973
for porn stars and astronauts.

561
00:25:42,019 --> 00:25:44,253
- What a strapline!
- What car is there today

562
00:25:44,278 --> 00:25:46,239
that could be driven by
porn stars and astronauts?

563
00:25:46,309 --> 00:25:48,357
- There isn't one.
- An Alfa!

564
00:25:48,417 --> 00:25:50,722
An Alfa?!

565
00:25:51,044 --> 00:25:53,072
Actually, he's right!

566
00:25:53,145 --> 00:25:55,932
No, astronauts
have to get there.

567
00:25:55,973 --> 00:25:57,372
He's right! That's exactly

568
00:25:57,396 --> 00:25:59,659
- what the Quadriplegio is!
- No!

569
00:25:59,732 --> 00:26:02,740
This is for porn stars and astronauts,
which is what I am.

570
00:26:02,843 --> 00:26:04,307
Now, I would like to have

571
00:26:04,357 --> 00:26:07,542
a conversation about
the Nürburgring.

572
00:26:07,771 --> 00:26:09,092
- Go on.
- Because this is important.

573
00:26:09,115 --> 00:26:10,645
Last year, I was delighted.

574
00:26:10,685 --> 00:26:12,474
The people who run
the Nürburgring in Germany,

575
00:26:12,499 --> 00:26:15,285
they said they were gonna
ban car manufacturers

576
00:26:15,435 --> 00:26:17,326
from setting lap records there.

577
00:26:17,404 --> 00:26:19,888
Sorry, why were you
delighted about that?

578
00:26:19,942 --> 00:26:21,460
Because that's
an excellent idea.

579
00:26:21,576 --> 00:26:23,968
If you make a car
that is excellent

580
00:26:24,038 --> 00:26:25,537
for doing a fast lap
of the Nürburgring,

581
00:26:25,560 --> 00:26:28,163
it would be useless as a car
everywhere else in your life.

582
00:26:28,224 --> 00:26:30,404
It's like... It's like
setting your house up

583
00:26:30,443 --> 00:26:31,482
to play Laser Quest.

584
00:26:31,508 --> 00:26:34,237
It will be brilliant
for playing Laser Quest,

585
00:26:34,279 --> 00:26:35,616
but it'll be rubbish
for a dinner party

586
00:26:35,641 --> 00:26:36,804
because it's full of lasers,

587
00:26:36,881 --> 00:26:38,529
darkness, fog
and music that goes...

588
00:26:39,675 --> 00:26:40,554
and people running around

589
00:26:40,593 --> 00:26:41,952
thinking that they're
in Star Wars.

590
00:26:42,021 --> 00:26:43,413
Or you could get a dog...

591
00:26:43,490 --> 00:26:45,404
You could train a dog
as an attack dog,

592
00:26:45,406 --> 00:26:47,943
which is fantastic
if you own a scrapyard

593
00:26:48,021 --> 00:26:49,357
and you need
the dog to guard it,

594
00:26:49,385 --> 00:26:52,810
but take it home as a pet,
it will eat your children.

595
00:26:52,927 --> 00:26:53,851
It's completely useless.

596
00:26:53,875 --> 00:26:54,599
That's what happens

597
00:26:54,625 --> 00:26:56,904
when you set a car up
for the Nürburgring.

598
00:26:56,940 --> 00:26:58,740
This isn't really
a conversation, James.

599
00:26:58,813 --> 00:27:01,554
No, I think we've accidentally
turned down Rant Lane this week.

600
00:27:01,693 --> 00:27:02,990
Well, there's more.

601
00:27:03,013 --> 00:27:04,099
- He's off again.
- No, no.

602
00:27:04,125 --> 00:27:06,602
But the thing is,
the bad news in all this

603
00:27:06,638 --> 00:27:07,874
is that they've decided

604
00:27:07,939 --> 00:27:09,805
that they will allow
car manufacturers

605
00:27:09,835 --> 00:27:11,396
to set lap records again.

606
00:27:11,422 --> 00:27:12,326
Well, that's good.

607
00:27:12,410 --> 00:27:13,576
- No, it's bad!
- OK.

608
00:27:13,607 --> 00:27:15,630
Think of the cars
that have come out recently

609
00:27:15,654 --> 00:27:17,044
that we've driven
that have been developed

610
00:27:17,067 --> 00:27:18,876
so that they would go fast
around the Nürburgring.

611
00:27:18,901 --> 00:27:20,801
BMW M4 GTS,

612
00:27:20,874 --> 00:27:22,907
you can't deny it,
it's a terrible car.

613
00:27:22,962 --> 00:27:24,963
Nissan GT-R,
the Track Edition,

614
00:27:24,989 --> 00:27:26,521
that is a terrible car.

615
00:27:26,576 --> 00:27:29,874
Even SEAT...
the SEAT Leon Cupra 280,

616
00:27:29,968 --> 00:27:32,461
that's got a hatchback record for
going around the Nürburgring,

617
00:27:32,513 --> 00:27:33,529
and it's rubbish!

618
00:27:33,590 --> 00:27:35,843
The Nürburgring ruins cars.

619
00:27:35,904 --> 00:27:37,615
I'm developing an app
for the smart phone

620
00:27:37,679 --> 00:27:39,001
called Bomb The Nürburgring

621
00:27:39,027 --> 00:27:40,894
where you guide
a Dornier 17 over it

622
00:27:41,007 --> 00:27:42,448
and blow it up.

623
00:27:42,538 --> 00:27:44,413
What are you doing
on this programme?

624
00:27:44,438 --> 00:27:45,693
Talking sense!

625
00:27:45,756 --> 00:27:47,557
Good question.
I don't know.

626
00:27:47,644 --> 00:27:50,512
We have this old woman who
has a baking show in Britain.

627
00:27:50,551 --> 00:27:51,826
She's called Mary Berry.

628
00:27:51,912 --> 00:27:53,873
It would be...
You probably know her.

629
00:27:53,965 --> 00:27:55,106
It's probably the same

630
00:27:55,162 --> 00:27:57,186
as her saying, "I hate cakes!"

631
00:27:57,208 --> 00:27:58,162
Yes.

632
00:27:58,205 --> 00:27:59,551
Mary Berry would agree with me,

633
00:27:59,605 --> 00:28:01,200
because if she made a cake

634
00:28:01,231 --> 00:28:02,992
that had been developed
on the Nürburgring,

635
00:28:03,028 --> 00:28:05,662
someone would put
fried onions on the top

636
00:28:05,708 --> 00:28:07,723
and completely ruin it.
You'd have a Victoria sponge

637
00:28:07,748 --> 00:28:10,099
with onion on the top
for no reason!

638
00:28:10,201 --> 00:28:11,676
James, you know
you're weird, don't you?

639
00:28:11,701 --> 00:28:13,856
That's not weird. That's
the most sensible thing

640
00:28:13,958 --> 00:28:15,223
that's ever been said
on this show.

641
00:28:15,248 --> 00:28:16,833
- You are weird.
- I'm not weird.

642
00:28:16,942 --> 00:28:18,880
He is weird! We were coming
through the airport

643
00:28:18,962 --> 00:28:20,692
here the other day,
coming through Chicago,

644
00:28:20,770 --> 00:28:22,848
and he went,
"Jeremy, smell my jacket."

645
00:28:22,895 --> 00:28:24,028
He said what?!

646
00:28:24,098 --> 00:28:25,169
- Yeah.
- He did.

647
00:28:25,223 --> 00:28:26,882
He said, "Smell my jacket."
I said, "Why?"

648
00:28:26,903 --> 00:28:29,352
He said, "Because it smells
of old record players."

649
00:28:29,412 --> 00:28:32,201
- Mate, that is weird.
- But it did!

650
00:28:32,465 --> 00:28:34,473
You know record players
don't smell of anything?

651
00:28:34,590 --> 00:28:36,001
They do. Old ones do.

652
00:28:36,027 --> 00:28:37,395
They smell of old
record players.

653
00:28:37,473 --> 00:28:39,128
Who knows what they smell like?

654
00:28:39,201 --> 00:28:40,662
- I'd like us...
- The decaying...

655
00:28:40,697 --> 00:28:42,031
I'd like us to move it on

656
00:28:42,037 --> 00:28:43,662
because it's getting scary now.

657
00:28:43,715 --> 00:28:45,098
That's not the record player!

658
00:28:45,124 --> 00:28:46,715
We'll have another...
What are you on about?

659
00:28:46,740 --> 00:28:48,259
Does anybody have
an old record player,

660
00:28:48,294 --> 00:28:49,355
or anything old electrical?

661
00:28:49,380 --> 00:28:50,403
They smell, don't they?

662
00:28:50,429 --> 00:28:52,419
Has anybody ever smelled
an old record player?

663
00:28:52,451 --> 00:28:54,231
Really? You think you have?

664
00:28:54,442 --> 00:28:56,078
You've smelled an old...

665
00:28:56,169 --> 00:28:58,145
God, strewth!

666
00:28:59,755 --> 00:29:02,615
Did it have a wax cylinder on
it, your old record player?

667
00:29:02,715 --> 00:29:05,419
They smell like old plastic
and warm rubber.

668
00:29:05,590 --> 00:29:06,661
Yeah, exactly.

669
00:29:06,723 --> 00:29:09,460
That smells like a party at James's house.
special... is that..

670
00:29:11,153 --> 00:29:13,715
You're actually talking
to Thomas Edison there.

671
00:29:16,299 --> 00:29:17,700
In person.

672
00:29:17,817 --> 00:29:19,102
Well done, sir.

673
00:29:19,294 --> 00:29:20,577
Now, as we're told

674
00:29:20,633 --> 00:29:23,465
almost every day
these days, really,

675
00:29:23,520 --> 00:29:26,576
the world's coral reefs
are all dying.

676
00:29:26,731 --> 00:29:29,590
And we're told that this
is the fault of the car.

677
00:29:29,645 --> 00:29:31,848
Well, since we host a car show,

678
00:29:31,919 --> 00:29:34,460
we thought it would be
our duty and responsibility

679
00:29:34,590 --> 00:29:36,395
to do something about it.

680
00:29:43,865 --> 00:29:47,705
Here in the Caribbean,
all appears to be well.

681
00:29:47,830 --> 00:29:49,765
But under
the shimmering blue sea,

682
00:29:49,862 --> 00:29:53,307
there's just miles
and miles of sand.

683
00:29:54,640 --> 00:29:56,588
It's an underwater desert.

684
00:29:58,174 --> 00:30:00,049
And even when
you do find a reef,

685
00:30:00,159 --> 00:30:03,104
most of the coral
is dead or dying.

686
00:30:07,143 --> 00:30:08,451
Thirty-eight years ago,

687
00:30:08,510 --> 00:30:10,385
the local government sank a ship

688
00:30:10,424 --> 00:30:13,448
to encourage the coral
to come back.

689
00:30:14,224 --> 00:30:16,002
And it's working.

690
00:30:16,227 --> 00:30:19,249
It's already an oasis of life.

691
00:30:21,164 --> 00:30:24,201
And that gave us an idea.

692
00:30:24,959 --> 00:30:28,115
Why use a ship as the hub
or your coral reef?

693
00:30:28,171 --> 00:30:30,976
Why not use cars?
There are millions of them.

694
00:30:31,171 --> 00:30:33,585
So that's exactly what we've
done. We've got five cars.

695
00:30:33,671 --> 00:30:35,444
And rather than go
through all the expense

696
00:30:35,470 --> 00:30:37,346
and complication
of recycling them,

697
00:30:37,451 --> 00:30:39,365
we've stripped them,
taken the engines out,

698
00:30:39,476 --> 00:30:41,904
removed the paint, and they're
ready to go in the sea.

699
00:30:42,007 --> 00:30:43,874
This really does
make perfect sense,

700
00:30:43,943 --> 00:30:45,810
because when the car
is in the water,

701
00:30:45,904 --> 00:30:46,921
it will start to corrode,

702
00:30:46,999 --> 00:30:48,217
and that attracts all the things

703
00:30:48,240 --> 00:30:49,796
that help the coral grow.

704
00:30:49,904 --> 00:30:51,861
And then the car itself
just rusts away

705
00:30:51,943 --> 00:30:53,363
to absolutely nothing.

706
00:30:53,435 --> 00:30:55,046
So this one, which started life

707
00:30:55,124 --> 00:30:56,396
as a pretty horrible Peugeot

708
00:30:56,443 --> 00:30:57,779
and was always a terrible car,

709
00:30:57,896 --> 00:31:01,046
will eventually become
a beautiful coral reef.

710
00:31:01,201 --> 00:31:03,296
And all this happens
quite quickly.

711
00:31:03,382 --> 00:31:04,615
So in just a few years' time,

712
00:31:04,693 --> 00:31:07,343
the BBC will be able to make
a wildlife documentary

713
00:31:07,443 --> 00:31:08,978
just in this wheel arch.

714
00:31:09,002 --> 00:31:10,335
Anyway, we've got the cars.

715
00:31:10,468 --> 00:31:11,468
I've got a crane.

716
00:31:11,538 --> 00:31:12,835
All we need now is a boat,

717
00:31:12,921 --> 00:31:14,576
which is a job
we gave to Jeremy.

718
00:31:14,646 --> 00:31:16,007
That's his responsibility.

719
00:31:16,132 --> 00:31:17,538
He'll have overdone it,
won't he?

720
00:31:17,563 --> 00:31:19,258
Well, he'll have made a
statement of some sort, so...

721
00:31:19,281 --> 00:31:22,724
Freight ship.
Full-on freight ship.

722
00:31:22,772 --> 00:31:24,241
Or a tanker.

723
00:31:30,614 --> 00:31:34,886
♪♪

724
00:31:34,971 --> 00:31:36,638
Oh. He hasn't overdone it.

725
00:31:36,810 --> 00:31:38,746
Is that him?

726
00:31:40,089 --> 00:31:42,300
What is the point of that?

727
00:31:42,574 --> 00:31:44,515
Will you come and tie it up?

728
00:31:49,261 --> 00:31:52,128
That's the worst boat
I've ever seen. That's awful!

729
00:31:52,308 --> 00:31:54,339
- What's the matter with it?
- Well, it...

730
00:31:54,512 --> 00:31:57,472
We gave you $5,000
to buy a boat.

731
00:31:57,558 --> 00:31:59,121
Boats are expensive!

732
00:31:59,228 --> 00:32:01,128
You didn't spend
all five grand on this.

733
00:32:01,231 --> 00:32:02,897
- That is not a five thou...
- Yes!

734
00:32:02,957 --> 00:32:04,550
I've got toothache. Be kind.

735
00:32:04,621 --> 00:32:07,214
Irrelevant.
That is not a $5,000 boat.

736
00:32:07,300 --> 00:32:09,038
- It is!
- It's barely a boat. Look at it!

737
00:32:09,080 --> 00:32:11,425
It's brilliant!
You'll get a car on this.

738
00:32:11,597 --> 00:32:13,761
- Er... Where?
- On the back!

739
00:32:13,863 --> 00:32:15,644
- Who did you buy it from?
- A man.

740
00:32:15,645 --> 00:32:17,847
- Was he laughing?
- No, he wasn't.

741
00:32:17,957 --> 00:32:19,855
- Can I come aboard?
- No.

742
00:32:20,019 --> 00:32:21,220
I don't think it can take two.

743
00:32:21,246 --> 00:32:23,519
Look! It's terrible!

744
00:32:24,009 --> 00:32:25,470
Instead of just standing there,

745
00:32:25,501 --> 00:32:27,696
criticising a man
who's got toothache,

746
00:32:27,962 --> 00:32:31,294
why don't you go and get
a car on the crane

747
00:32:31,365 --> 00:32:33,517
and start loading it?

748
00:32:34,830 --> 00:32:39,306
Soon, our first car was ready
to be lifted onto the boat.

749
00:32:40,197 --> 00:32:42,347
It's just nice to be putting
something back, really.

750
00:32:42,493 --> 00:32:44,439
It genuinely is.
It's a little old Corsa,

751
00:32:44,618 --> 00:32:46,079
and it's gonna be full of coral.

752
00:32:46,197 --> 00:32:47,767
Mr Coral coming, swimming along.

753
00:32:47,845 --> 00:32:49,095
"Ooh, there's something
to latch on to."

754
00:32:49,118 --> 00:32:50,298
Then his friend comes along.

755
00:32:50,376 --> 00:32:51,595
His friend comes along.

756
00:32:51,767 --> 00:32:53,126
This is a genuinely
brilliant idea.

757
00:32:53,165 --> 00:32:55,116
That doesn't fill me with...

758
00:32:55,282 --> 00:32:56,352
total confidence.

759
00:33:03,173 --> 00:33:04,923
Down a bit! Down!

760
00:33:05,161 --> 00:33:06,915
You'll have to...

761
00:33:07,130 --> 00:33:08,631
Boom out!

762
00:33:08,798 --> 00:33:10,337
Is that the sign for "boom out"?

763
00:33:10,392 --> 00:33:13,111
That. Yeah, that.

764
00:33:13,298 --> 00:33:15,564
It's like being guided
by The Village People.

765
00:33:15,759 --> 00:33:17,105
It's working now. Unless...

766
00:33:17,157 --> 00:33:19,317
On! On!

767
00:33:19,392 --> 00:33:21,443
- The next danger...
- You're really helping.

768
00:33:21,532 --> 00:33:23,346
- I've got the guideline.
- Right, go!

769
00:33:23,371 --> 00:33:26,902
♪♪

770
00:33:26,949 --> 00:33:29,971
♪♪

771
00:33:30,019 --> 00:33:33,064
- Down a bit, James.
- Watch for the wind.

772
00:33:33,175 --> 00:33:34,692
Hammond,
can you swing it around?

773
00:33:34,717 --> 00:33:35,550
Do you want me to swing it?

774
00:33:35,576 --> 00:33:36,911
Yeah, try and get it...

775
00:33:37,327 --> 00:33:38,901
Oh, shit!

776
00:33:40,530 --> 00:33:42,163
Who pulled that?

777
00:33:42,432 --> 00:33:45,701
We've got to save the car!
It's a reef! Save it!

778
00:33:45,768 --> 00:33:47,569
Oh, it's gone! It's gone!

779
00:33:47,685 --> 00:33:48,912
Who pulled the...

780
00:33:48,996 --> 00:33:51,209
That's to release it,
you Muppet!

781
00:33:51,342 --> 00:33:52,990
Well, I thought
it was a guide rope.

782
00:33:53,115 --> 00:33:56,490
No, I steer it! You just
release it when it's on there!

783
00:33:56,528 --> 00:33:58,420
He told me to steer it without load.

784
00:33:58,506 --> 00:33:59,809
He said,
"Pull the rope to steer it."

785
00:33:59,834 --> 00:34:01,763
This is a £400,000 crane!

786
00:34:01,856 --> 00:34:03,692
Why would you steer it
with a piece of string?!

787
00:34:03,715 --> 00:34:05,076
It's got all these
knobs and buttons.

788
00:34:05,099 --> 00:34:08,391
I steer it, you release it!

789
00:34:08,755 --> 00:34:10,295
So that's a quick release?

790
00:34:10,360 --> 00:34:11,858
- Yes!
- Got it.

791
00:34:14,983 --> 00:34:18,099
What if we just said
we only had four cars?

792
00:34:18,226 --> 00:34:20,570
So we've taken four cars,
removed the engines

793
00:34:20,710 --> 00:34:22,733
and the paint, and they're ready
to go in the sea.

794
00:34:22,827 --> 00:34:25,574
- We'll do that piece to camera again.
- Yeah, yeah.

795
00:34:25,693 --> 00:34:28,538
The thing is, why use a ship
as the hub of your reef?

796
00:34:28,623 --> 00:34:30,554
Why not use cars?
There are millions.

797
00:34:30,679 --> 00:34:33,835
So we've taken four cars,
removed the engines,

798
00:34:33,920 --> 00:34:37,452
stripped them down and they're
ready to go in the sea.

799
00:34:37,623 --> 00:34:39,221
And then James...
Oh, yeah.

800
00:34:39,222 --> 00:34:40,577
And then... And then,

801
00:34:40,686 --> 00:34:42,990
this Peugeot
was no good as a car,

802
00:34:43,123 --> 00:34:46,396
but will be... but the coral
will just stick to it,

803
00:34:46,460 --> 00:34:48,063
oxidising and algae.

804
00:34:48,146 --> 00:34:49,490
Doesn't take very long.

805
00:34:49,568 --> 00:34:52,405
One day, BBC documentary,
wheel arch.

806
00:34:52,498 --> 00:34:54,498
Yeah, from just four cars.
That's all we had.

807
00:34:54,615 --> 00:34:56,572
Four cars. That's all
you need for a reef.

808
00:34:56,663 --> 00:34:58,351
Right, here's the boat
we've selected.

809
00:34:58,393 --> 00:34:59,695
It's a little bit damaged.

810
00:35:01,663 --> 00:35:03,311
With the release rope stowed,

811
00:35:03,429 --> 00:35:06,030
we managed to get
the first of our four cars

812
00:35:06,170 --> 00:35:10,123
onto the boat, which had
come with a broken roof.

813
00:35:11,215 --> 00:35:13,106
Yeah. Oh, yes!

814
00:35:13,289 --> 00:35:15,405
- Yes!
- Yeah!

815
00:35:15,559 --> 00:35:18,193
Good! Result.

816
00:35:18,351 --> 00:35:21,608
And then we had to
secure it in place.

817
00:35:23,476 --> 00:35:25,851
I don't understand
ratchet straps.

818
00:35:25,952 --> 00:35:29,045
Er... There's water
coming into the boat.

819
00:35:29,072 --> 00:35:32,264
- No, there was some in when I bought it.
- It's leaking.

820
00:35:32,436 --> 00:35:34,740
There's always a bit of water
in the bilges.

821
00:35:34,827 --> 00:35:36,873
It's why boats have bilge pumps.

822
00:35:36,976 --> 00:35:38,713
No, it's coming in.

823
00:35:38,936 --> 00:35:41,702
It's not just like it's in,
it's coming in.

824
00:35:41,873 --> 00:35:43,827
- Well, there's none here.
- There's holes! It's leaking!

825
00:35:43,851 --> 00:35:47,568
Oh, shit! No, there is!
Well, attach us to the crane.

826
00:35:47,623 --> 00:35:49,458
Er...
It's gone down.

827
00:35:49,530 --> 00:35:51,490
It has gone...
It is going down.

828
00:35:51,561 --> 00:35:53,170
If you attach us
to the crane,

829
00:35:53,271 --> 00:35:54,563
it won't sink, will it?

830
00:35:54,655 --> 00:35:55,990
We're tied on.

831
00:35:56,068 --> 00:35:58,842
James, can you
just take the slack?

832
00:35:59,905 --> 00:36:01,737
Sadly, James misunderstood

833
00:36:01,795 --> 00:36:03,358
this simple instruction.

834
00:36:03,615 --> 00:36:05,115
Oh, the whole thing

835
00:36:05,208 --> 00:36:06,476
has collapsed at the back!

836
00:36:06,476 --> 00:36:07,809
Oh, dear God!

837
00:36:07,943 --> 00:36:09,711
Wait! Stop!
Whoa! Whoa! What?

838
00:36:09,795 --> 00:36:10,990
It's falling over!

839
00:36:11,101 --> 00:36:12,733
James, it's falling!

840
00:36:12,782 --> 00:36:14,271
- What do you want?
- Holy Mother of God!

841
00:36:14,295 --> 00:36:17,771
It's going down!
Abandon ship! Save yourself!

842
00:36:21,452 --> 00:36:22,985
Catch it, James!

843
00:36:23,025 --> 00:36:24,639
Save it!

844
00:36:24,795 --> 00:36:25,896
Stop!

845
00:36:26,007 --> 00:36:27,858
What are you doing?

846
00:36:27,998 --> 00:36:29,601
Oh, God.

847
00:36:29,766 --> 00:36:31,748
The French Secret Service

848
00:36:31,867 --> 00:36:35,396
didn't do a job as good as this.

849
00:36:35,505 --> 00:36:37,139
I'm not talking
to any of you.

850
00:36:37,226 --> 00:36:39,014
No. Come on,
it was May's fault.

851
00:36:39,074 --> 00:36:40,510
You bought a crap boat,

852
00:36:40,554 --> 00:36:42,487
you put an idiot spaniel
on the crane,

853
00:36:42,512 --> 00:36:44,514
and, also, think
what we were gonna do

854
00:36:44,545 --> 00:36:45,880
for the conception of the car.

855
00:36:45,967 --> 00:36:47,521
People would love the car.
They would see it

856
00:36:47,545 --> 00:36:50,719
as a friendly,
coral-loving thing.

857
00:36:50,976 --> 00:36:52,327
You're swimming
like an old woman.

858
00:36:52,365 --> 00:36:54,748
I don't like being
in the bloody water!

859
00:36:54,824 --> 00:36:59,663
Fact! I'm not comfortable!
I'm from Birmingham!

860
00:36:59,795 --> 00:37:02,030
Having sunk a boat and two cars

861
00:37:02,101 --> 00:37:04,132
where the cruise liners
normally park,

862
00:37:04,217 --> 00:37:09,077
the port authorities
suggested we go away.

863
00:37:09,318 --> 00:37:11,507
So we took
our three remaining cars

864
00:37:11,592 --> 00:37:13,059
to a nearby marina,

865
00:37:13,273 --> 00:37:14,773
built ourselves a raft,

866
00:37:14,896 --> 00:37:16,092
and hired a boat

867
00:37:16,157 --> 00:37:18,429
which had a crane on the front.

868
00:37:22,568 --> 00:37:23,920
- May!
- What?

869
00:37:23,998 --> 00:37:26,123
You're not operating the crane.

870
00:37:26,271 --> 00:37:28,507
You are operating the crane.

871
00:37:28,592 --> 00:37:29,592
Yeah.

872
00:37:29,626 --> 00:37:30,780
I'd just like to point out

873
00:37:30,827 --> 00:37:32,132
that I've been fired from a job

874
00:37:32,186 --> 00:37:33,693
that I was doing perfectly.

875
00:37:34,592 --> 00:37:35,764
Meant that.

876
00:37:35,789 --> 00:37:38,193
I can't get the crane
working. Is there a switch?

877
00:37:38,224 --> 00:37:40,195
Oh! Don't come to me for help.
I'm rubbish at cranes.

878
00:37:40,219 --> 00:37:43,210
I didn't, did I? Did I?

879
00:37:43,719 --> 00:37:46,655
Soon, we were ready
to load our first car.

880
00:37:48,277 --> 00:37:49,344
You're miles away!

881
00:37:49,405 --> 00:37:50,445
You've got to be spot-on.

882
00:37:50,507 --> 00:37:51,914
I can only lift it to there.

883
00:37:51,990 --> 00:37:53,851
This way, this way,
this way, this way.

884
00:37:54,016 --> 00:37:55,726
No, up, up, up.

885
00:37:56,608 --> 00:37:58,507
I can't... Jeremy,
you'll have to go back.

886
00:37:58,577 --> 00:38:00,889
I can't do it if you keep
moving the boat!

887
00:38:00,936 --> 00:38:03,425
If I want to go backwards,
I should go that way.

888
00:38:03,568 --> 00:38:04,914
Right, this way. You've
got to...

889
00:38:04,938 --> 00:38:05,983
- I can't move it...
- I can't go

890
00:38:06,007 --> 00:38:07,177
that way! He's driving!

891
00:38:07,202 --> 00:38:08,757
I can't move it!

892
00:38:08,864 --> 00:38:11,155
Why don't we pick it...
Oh, God.

893
00:38:13,311 --> 00:38:14,920
Where are we going?!

894
00:38:14,983 --> 00:38:17,936
It-Its the bad things...
It's the wind!

895
00:38:18,123 --> 00:38:19,733
Why are we over here?

896
00:38:19,842 --> 00:38:20,943
Wind!

897
00:38:21,021 --> 00:38:23,639
Here he comes!
This is it! This is it!

898
00:38:23,679 --> 00:38:25,715
We're coming in hot!

899
00:38:25,873 --> 00:38:27,543
- Stop... chasing me...
- May, will you do some...

900
00:38:27,568 --> 00:38:29,373
- with the bloody crane!
- thing quickly in your life?

901
00:38:29,396 --> 00:38:31,114
I'm going to kill him!

902
00:38:31,481 --> 00:38:33,967
Here we go! Yes!
Run away! Run away!

903
00:38:34,958 --> 00:38:37,193
We have hooked the apple!

904
00:38:39,201 --> 00:38:41,041
- In a bit, in a bit.
- We are good.

905
00:38:41,106 --> 00:38:43,739
We are so good,
it's almost incredible.

906
00:38:43,764 --> 00:38:45,701
♪♪

907
00:38:45,702 --> 00:38:47,653
Now we had our eye in...

908
00:38:50,103 --> 00:38:51,440
Oh, Jesus.

909
00:38:51,675 --> 00:38:55,945
Loading the second car
was the work of a moment.

910
00:38:55,945 --> 00:38:58,014
- We're on.
- Oh, my God! Yes.

911
00:38:59,514 --> 00:39:01,817
That's it. That'll do.

912
00:39:01,867 --> 00:39:05,039
This is the manliest thing
I've ever done.

913
00:39:05,250 --> 00:39:08,289
I'm just gonna rest
my big balls on my crane.

914
00:39:14,235 --> 00:39:15,670
With our raft full,

915
00:39:15,710 --> 00:39:17,110
we headed out to the spot

916
00:39:17,143 --> 00:39:19,485
identified by marine biologists

917
00:39:19,554 --> 00:39:23,329
as having the perfect depth,
current and temperature

918
00:39:23,438 --> 00:39:25,360
for a reef to form.

919
00:39:26,510 --> 00:39:28,045
Release the reef!

920
00:39:28,077 --> 00:39:30,378
- Yes!
- There it goes!

921
00:39:30,461 --> 00:39:32,570
- The reef is born!
- That's our reef!

922
00:39:32,682 --> 00:39:35,009
- Sink!
- Come, coral! Come!

923
00:39:35,195 --> 00:39:38,414
Yeah!

924
00:39:38,570 --> 00:39:40,672
- Go!
- Yes!

925
00:39:40,791 --> 00:39:43,509
Oh, I'm pleased with that!

926
00:39:43,693 --> 00:39:45,860
The Peugeot 206.

927
00:39:45,954 --> 00:39:47,289
That is brilliant.

928
00:39:49,469 --> 00:39:51,485
Next, we had to anchor
the cars in place,

929
00:39:51,610 --> 00:39:55,813
which was a job for the only
qualified diver among us.

930
00:39:55,938 --> 00:39:58,259
He'd even brought
his own equipment.

931
00:39:59,818 --> 00:40:01,579
Right. Back a bit.

932
00:40:01,610 --> 00:40:02,719
Back... That's on my nose.

933
00:40:02,778 --> 00:40:04,278
Stop moaning!

934
00:40:04,349 --> 00:40:05,579
Ow!

935
00:40:17,414 --> 00:40:18,759
If he were a heart surgeon,

936
00:40:18,891 --> 00:40:20,634
he would turn up
with an old leather bag

937
00:40:20,719 --> 00:40:22,431
with a saw and hammer in it,
wouldn't he?

938
00:40:22,463 --> 00:40:24,289
"I'm ready to do your
operation. Here I am."

939
00:40:28,637 --> 00:40:31,594
It's like his old table with
his Bakelite telephone on it.

940
00:40:31,809 --> 00:40:34,411
- Yes.
- "Hello. Hammersmith 37 here."

941
00:40:35,811 --> 00:40:37,610
James's suit was so old,

942
00:40:37,735 --> 00:40:40,648
it didn't come with
air tanks, so, annoyingly,

943
00:40:40,735 --> 00:40:43,804
it was our responsibility
to keep him alive.

944
00:40:45,856 --> 00:40:47,891
How long
have we got to do this for?

945
00:40:48,251 --> 00:40:50,353
Well, for as long
as he's done there.

946
00:40:50,673 --> 00:40:53,664
- Honestly, I'm exhausted.
- I'm getting dizzy.

947
00:40:54,469 --> 00:40:56,103
We should keep going.

948
00:40:56,199 --> 00:40:58,148
No. Look, there's a generator.

949
00:40:58,268 --> 00:41:00,335
Why don't we just
connect it to the generator?

950
00:41:07,125 --> 00:41:08,510
Now. Now.

951
00:41:08,565 --> 00:41:10,266
- Yeah.
- You're an idiot.

952
00:41:15,762 --> 00:41:17,996
Life-saving air.

953
00:41:18,871 --> 00:41:20,545
Oh, there we go.

954
00:41:21,204 --> 00:41:23,443
On. And relax.

955
00:41:41,469 --> 00:41:42,889
Nearly!

956
00:42:10,739 --> 00:42:12,887
Come in, James.

957
00:42:13,076 --> 00:42:15,896
When our colleague
finally surfaced...

958
00:42:16,146 --> 00:42:18,148
he was very angry.

959
00:42:19,429 --> 00:42:21,730
That was nowhere near
the cars. Nowhere near.

960
00:42:21,802 --> 00:42:23,637
What was nowhere near the cars?

961
00:42:23,748 --> 00:42:26,228
You might as well have dropped
me off the coast of Los Angeles!

962
00:42:26,295 --> 00:42:28,849
- I couldn't even see them!
- Just stop. Stop.

963
00:42:28,891 --> 00:42:30,496
What do you...
What do you mean?

964
00:42:30,637 --> 00:42:32,418
How did you manage...
You're the boat expert,

965
00:42:32,474 --> 00:42:33,559
as you're forever telling us.

966
00:42:33,583 --> 00:42:35,329
How did you manage
to put the cars there

967
00:42:35,427 --> 00:42:38,184
and then move the boat
about 100 yards away?

968
00:42:38,286 --> 00:42:39,311
- We drifted.
- We drifted a bit.

969
00:42:39,335 --> 00:42:41,864
- Have you done the job?
- No.

970
00:42:42,036 --> 00:42:44,099
- What?
- The cars are not anchored.

971
00:42:44,152 --> 00:42:45,465
Because when I got there,

972
00:42:45,567 --> 00:42:48,686
your drifting, stupid,
orange biscuit-tin boat

973
00:42:48,724 --> 00:42:50,146
yanked me back off it!

974
00:42:50,255 --> 00:42:51,708
We don't have an afternoon

975
00:42:51,786 --> 00:42:53,282
to just throw away
while you go paddling.

976
00:42:53,306 --> 00:42:56,076
You're saying... I'm gonna
have to do it, aren't I?

977
00:42:56,099 --> 00:42:57,887
♪♪

978
00:42:57,887 --> 00:43:01,992
Soon, James Bond
was ready to go in the water.

979
00:43:02,016 --> 00:43:04,016
♪♪

980
00:43:04,059 --> 00:43:05,983
- Do I look like Roger Moore?
- Yeah, you do.

981
00:43:06,048 --> 00:43:08,918
- You do, yeah. Yeah.
- Roger Moore, the greengrocer.

982
00:43:09,193 --> 00:43:12,601
- Let go. Yes!
- Yay!

983
00:43:12,913 --> 00:43:15,724
I've just handed
Jeremy a welding iron.

984
00:43:15,795 --> 00:43:17,630
Oh, dear God.

985
00:43:21,978 --> 00:43:25,170
I'm not sure I trust Jeremy
to do welding.

986
00:43:25,467 --> 00:43:27,123
I wouldn't trust Jeremy

987
00:43:27,217 --> 00:43:30,389
to watch a YouTube guide
to welding.

988
00:43:30,519 --> 00:43:33,655
- Oh!
- What's that?

989
00:43:33,771 --> 00:43:36,157
- That's gone wrong.
- Jeremy?

990
00:43:36,268 --> 00:43:38,677
Badly, horribly wrong.

991
00:43:44,333 --> 00:43:46,342
Ah!

992
00:43:46,585 --> 00:43:48,592
- How did that go?
- Very well.

993
00:43:48,780 --> 00:43:50,068
- Did it?
- Oh, yeah.

994
00:43:50,155 --> 00:43:51,139
- Did it?
- Yeah.

995
00:43:51,170 --> 00:43:52,155
That was all...

996
00:43:52,179 --> 00:43:54,686
They are not going
anywhere in a hurry.

997
00:43:54,710 --> 00:43:58,646
♪♪

998
00:43:58,757 --> 00:44:01,550
We headed back to shore
for an agreeable dinner,

999
00:44:01,655 --> 00:44:04,554
happy that our important
environmental work

1000
00:44:04,670 --> 00:44:07,240
was, at last, going well.

1001
00:44:08,663 --> 00:44:11,318
♪♪

1002
00:44:11,427 --> 00:44:15,077
But are the coral starting now?

1003
00:44:15,413 --> 00:44:17,030
- Yeah.
- So they're down there now.

1004
00:44:17,085 --> 00:44:20,318
- A bit of coral's gonna...
- Yeah, it will have done.

1005
00:44:20,474 --> 00:44:21,717
It's not a big coral reef,

1006
00:44:21,795 --> 00:44:23,592
but it's the start
of a coral reef.

1007
00:44:23,639 --> 00:44:25,653
Well done, chaps.
We have done...

1008
00:44:25,679 --> 00:44:27,155
I don't clink glasses,
as you know,

1009
00:44:27,186 --> 00:44:29,740
but we can raise a glass
to our success today.

1010
00:44:29,827 --> 00:44:31,389
Yes. Well done, us.

1011
00:44:34,449 --> 00:44:36,418
Maybe that's what
Volkswagen were doing...

1012
00:44:36,418 --> 00:44:37,485
building a reef.

1013
00:44:37,487 --> 00:44:39,653
That could be it.
That could be it.

1014
00:44:39,867 --> 00:44:43,458
We're gonna pick up our important
marine biology work later on.

1015
00:44:43,547 --> 00:44:47,547
But now it's time to play
Celebrity Brain Crash!

1016
00:44:49,692 --> 00:44:53,117
♪♪

1017
00:44:54,929 --> 00:44:56,454
That doesn't get any better.

1018
00:44:56,601 --> 00:44:58,405
That really doesn't get
any better, that sting.

1019
00:44:58,429 --> 00:45:01,688
But anyway,
my guest tonight is from...

1020
00:45:01,735 --> 00:45:03,422
Well, how can I describe it,
really?

1021
00:45:03,501 --> 00:45:04,782
The second biggest

1022
00:45:04,836 --> 00:45:06,447
and most important
part of the world,

1023
00:45:06,507 --> 00:45:09,860
as far as music is concerned:
the Northeast of England.

1024
00:45:09,885 --> 00:45:11,451
Oh, come on!

1025
00:45:11,523 --> 00:45:12,789
Well, hello?!

1026
00:45:12,851 --> 00:45:14,652
Mark Knopfler, Paul Rodgers,

1027
00:45:14,985 --> 00:45:17,791
Gordon Sting, a couple of
people out of Little Mix.

1028
00:45:17,829 --> 00:45:20,561
- Lindisfarne. Mm, lovely.
- Yes, Lindisfarne. We'll gloss over that.

1029
00:45:20,594 --> 00:45:23,358
But then we've also got...
...the main man.

1030
00:45:23,438 --> 00:45:26,969
The man we have lined up for
you, he is the lead singer

1031
00:45:27,036 --> 00:45:29,773
of the biggest Rock Band
in the world, AC/DC.

1032
00:45:29,945 --> 00:45:32,507
Ladies and gentlemen,
Brian Johnson!

1033
00:45:34,554 --> 00:45:35,913
- There he is!
- There he is!

1034
00:45:35,936 --> 00:45:37,375
There he is! Here he comes!

1035
00:45:37,445 --> 00:45:40,188
What are we gonna
talk to him about?

1036
00:45:40,250 --> 00:45:42,626
- Well, he's taken up motor racing.
- Yeah.

1037
00:45:42,766 --> 00:45:44,876
- He's got a new TV show.
- Yes, on the road.

1038
00:45:44,900 --> 00:45:45,856
He's on the road.

1039
00:45:45,880 --> 00:45:48,141
I'm gonna talk to him
about being at the front

1040
00:45:48,211 --> 00:45:50,059
of the world's
biggest Rock Band.

1041
00:45:50,126 --> 00:45:52,016
- Where is he?
- He's Brian Johnson.

1042
00:45:52,085 --> 00:45:53,757
- Here he comes!
- Oh, there he is!

1043
00:45:53,829 --> 00:45:56,586
- There he is.
- The man himself. What a legend!

1044
00:45:56,688 --> 00:45:59,164
I can't... I've always wanted
to meet him. I'm thrilled.

1045
00:45:59,210 --> 00:46:01,184
- Yeah.
- That is a legend. Proper...

1046
00:46:01,269 --> 00:46:02,692
- Oh, hello.
- Oh, hello.

1047
00:46:02,784 --> 00:46:03,871
- What?
- Oh, my...

1048
00:46:05,675 --> 00:46:06,974
Oh, God!

1049
00:46:09,652 --> 00:46:12,456
- We killed him.
- We've killed Brian Johnson.

1050
00:46:12,608 --> 00:46:14,324
That's...

1051
00:46:14,909 --> 00:46:16,668
OK.

1052
00:46:16,952 --> 00:46:18,637
Brian Johnson has been run over

1053
00:46:18,715 --> 00:46:21,731
by some people who think
they are playing football.

1054
00:46:21,800 --> 00:46:23,891
- But they're not.
- It's not football, is it?

1055
00:46:23,934 --> 00:46:25,134
Cos they don't use their feet.

1056
00:46:25,224 --> 00:46:27,043
That's not football.

1057
00:46:27,175 --> 00:46:29,402
That's just people dressing up.

1058
00:46:30,965 --> 00:46:32,367
- That's...
- We play football.

1059
00:46:32,391 --> 00:46:34,621
- We play football.
- Yeah, with our feet.

1060
00:46:34,949 --> 00:46:36,456
We play football.

1061
00:46:36,644 --> 00:46:37,916
- Soccer! It's soccer!
- What?!

1062
00:46:37,940 --> 00:46:40,817
It's not soccer!
It's football that we play!

1063
00:46:40,894 --> 00:46:44,659
It's 6.75 billion people in
the world call it football!

1064
00:46:46,034 --> 00:46:47,746
You can moan and shout
all you like.

1065
00:46:47,831 --> 00:46:49,751
The fact is, we're British
and we edit this show,

1066
00:46:49,824 --> 00:46:51,119
and you'll just get cut out.

1067
00:46:51,246 --> 00:46:52,646
You will.

1068
00:46:53,422 --> 00:46:55,190
This is a rugby ball!

1069
00:46:55,253 --> 00:46:56,391
Look on the screen.

1070
00:46:56,472 --> 00:46:57,644
They're only playing

1071
00:46:57,670 --> 00:47:00,003
with the padding
they were born with!

1072
00:47:00,262 --> 00:47:01,753
This is not a football!

1073
00:47:01,864 --> 00:47:03,697
They call it football.

1074
00:47:07,603 --> 00:47:11,840
USA! USA! USA! USA! USA!

1075
00:47:14,411 --> 00:47:15,614
So...

1076
00:47:15,701 --> 00:47:18,755
Brian Johnson
has been run over by erm...

1077
00:47:18,965 --> 00:47:21,882
some supremely brave
and talented footballers.

1078
00:47:26,922 --> 00:47:28,900
Er...

1079
00:47:29,228 --> 00:47:31,197
Does that mean
he's not coming on, then?

1080
00:47:31,260 --> 00:47:33,275
Well, James, he's been hammered

1081
00:47:33,344 --> 00:47:34,516
to the thickness of an envelope

1082
00:47:34,541 --> 00:47:37,331
and his spine is now
a jigsaw, so that is a no.

1083
00:47:37,391 --> 00:47:38,726
Fine.

1084
00:47:39,166 --> 00:47:41,126
Right, so what are we
gonna do to fill the time?

1085
00:47:41,170 --> 00:47:42,032
I've got nothing.

1086
00:47:42,063 --> 00:47:43,014
We could get back

1087
00:47:43,039 --> 00:47:45,103
to our important
marine biology work.

1088
00:47:45,202 --> 00:47:46,844
- Plan. Do it.
- Yes, let's do that.

1089
00:47:46,900 --> 00:47:48,385
So when we left the action,

1090
00:47:48,485 --> 00:47:50,579
erm... I'd successfully

1091
00:47:50,681 --> 00:47:52,922
welded two cars to the seabed,

1092
00:47:52,969 --> 00:47:54,204
and that was good.

1093
00:47:54,259 --> 00:47:57,061
Yeah, and we pick up
the action the next day,

1094
00:47:57,157 --> 00:47:59,588
as we go back to finish the job.

1095
00:47:59,612 --> 00:48:02,945
♪♪

1096
00:48:03,054 --> 00:48:04,976
On our way
to get the last car,

1097
00:48:05,041 --> 00:48:06,469
we stopped at the reef site

1098
00:48:06,518 --> 00:48:09,054
to make sure everything was OK.

1099
00:48:10,483 --> 00:48:12,086
Tom Daley!

1100
00:48:19,161 --> 00:48:20,793
I don't like it.

1101
00:48:20,842 --> 00:48:22,445
Oh. Oh.

1102
00:48:25,547 --> 00:48:28,101
And after a few moments
in the water,

1103
00:48:28,217 --> 00:48:31,018
we discovered it wasn't.

1104
00:48:31,043 --> 00:48:34,166
Where the bloody hell
are they? There's the buoy.

1105
00:48:34,224 --> 00:48:35,858
This is the wrong place.

1106
00:48:35,952 --> 00:48:37,733
Yes,
that marks the spot.

1107
00:48:37,851 --> 00:48:39,469
They're just not here.

1108
00:48:39,554 --> 00:48:42,639
Why did we trust you
to fix them in place?

1109
00:48:42,664 --> 00:48:44,898
- I didn't... Listen.
- Of all people.

1110
00:48:44,936 --> 00:48:46,195
Well, I don't understand it,

1111
00:48:46,257 --> 00:48:48,882
cos I don't normally
make a mess of...

1112
00:48:48,960 --> 00:48:50,588
Oh, you must have made
a good job of it.

1113
00:48:50,612 --> 00:48:51,844
That's why they've gone!

1114
00:48:51,976 --> 00:48:54,202
There is evidence,
or a lack of it,

1115
00:48:54,398 --> 00:48:55,733
to suggest you can't weld.

1116
00:48:55,757 --> 00:48:57,411
- Oh, shit.
- Maybe a shark...

1117
00:48:57,413 --> 00:48:59,481
- Er...
- What?

1118
00:48:59,710 --> 00:49:01,561
- What?
- Look.

1119
00:49:01,927 --> 00:49:03,445
Oh, brilliant!

1120
00:49:03,518 --> 00:49:05,280
How the hell
did they do that, though?

1121
00:49:05,367 --> 00:49:07,929
You know this current
that's whizzing us about?

1122
00:49:08,023 --> 00:49:10,664
Look at them! They're not
gonna make a reef, are they?!

1123
00:49:10,818 --> 00:49:12,655
Well, maybe... it could be

1124
00:49:12,695 --> 00:49:14,764
like a play area
for the privileged.

1125
00:49:14,824 --> 00:49:15,936
Some rusty cars?

1126
00:49:15,961 --> 00:49:16,943
That doesn't
work, does it?

1127
00:49:16,969 --> 00:49:18,358
No.

1128
00:49:18,382 --> 00:49:21,445
♪♪

1129
00:49:21,471 --> 00:49:23,605
Obviously,
we had to retrieve them,

1130
00:49:23,648 --> 00:49:25,280
which meant moving the raft

1131
00:49:25,340 --> 00:49:28,108
to the stern of our crane boat.

1132
00:49:29,672 --> 00:49:31,304
James,
have you untied that end?

1133
00:49:31,380 --> 00:49:35,398
Yeah. Get ready to catch
this rope. Here we go.

1134
00:49:35,914 --> 00:49:38,264
Pull it along a bit and get
it sort of squared up.

1135
00:49:38,500 --> 00:49:39,788
I'll have a nice ride.

1136
00:49:39,851 --> 00:49:42,476
Right.
Repositioning raft.

1137
00:49:44,664 --> 00:49:46,527
That's a reassuring noise.

1138
00:49:46,648 --> 00:49:50,507
Er... Where...
Where's that come from?

1139
00:49:50,710 --> 00:49:52,065
James. James.

1140
00:49:52,195 --> 00:49:53,733
- What?
- What's that doing over there?

1141
00:49:53,789 --> 00:49:54,844
What's what doing?

1142
00:49:54,992 --> 00:49:56,719
All this bamboo's come off.

1143
00:49:56,882 --> 00:49:58,320
What have you untied?

1144
00:49:58,373 --> 00:50:00,608
I've untied the piece
of string at the front.

1145
00:50:00,655 --> 00:50:04,846
But, look, half the craft
is disappearing.

1146
00:50:05,460 --> 00:50:07,981
As the raft
was disintegrating fast,

1147
00:50:08,148 --> 00:50:10,751
we had to get it
to shore quickly.

1148
00:50:10,875 --> 00:50:13,155
Firing up the machine!

1149
00:50:15,248 --> 00:50:17,882
Sadly, though,
Jeremy's turn of speed

1150
00:50:18,072 --> 00:50:19,891
only made things worse.

1151
00:50:19,958 --> 00:50:22,126
Power! Power! Come on!

1152
00:50:22,197 --> 00:50:23,498
Slow down!

1153
00:50:24,771 --> 00:50:26,856
It's falling apart!

1154
00:50:27,168 --> 00:50:29,505
- Look, he's going down!
- Slow down!

1155
00:50:29,686 --> 00:50:32,155
Slow!

1156
00:50:40,208 --> 00:50:42,583
You can't put cars
on that, can you?

1157
00:50:43,277 --> 00:50:45,434
After we'd rescued James,

1158
00:50:45,521 --> 00:50:48,068
he stupidly suggested that,
to solve the problem,

1159
00:50:48,215 --> 00:50:50,802
we should ruin
everyone's holiday.

1160
00:51:00,865 --> 00:51:03,623
I think these people
should move out of the way.

1161
00:51:03,818 --> 00:51:06,807
My plan was to tow the cars
off the beach

1162
00:51:06,865 --> 00:51:10,378
and back to the harbour
so we could start again.

1163
00:51:10,545 --> 00:51:14,443
Which meant I'd need the help
of the man from Atlantis.

1164
00:51:14,693 --> 00:51:17,485
Hold my hand! There! There!
There! Now, let me go.

1165
00:51:17,487 --> 00:51:19,130
Yeah, that's me.
You have to let...

1166
00:51:19,168 --> 00:51:22,222
Oh, mind my arm!
Let me go now. I'm fine.

1167
00:51:22,503 --> 00:51:23,902
I don't like it!

1168
00:51:27,804 --> 00:51:29,440
Move!

1169
00:51:36,775 --> 00:51:40,322
Hammond, tie both of them to
this and give me a thumbs up.

1170
00:51:40,431 --> 00:51:42,346
If James gets those
onto the road,

1171
00:51:42,440 --> 00:51:44,119
all the way back up to
the harbour,

1172
00:51:44,228 --> 00:51:47,681
build another raft,
get them loaded on...

1173
00:51:47,846 --> 00:51:50,768
bring them back,
it's gonna take days.

1174
00:51:54,034 --> 00:51:56,143
- OK.
- Don't stand near the back.

1175
00:51:56,213 --> 00:51:57,878
The brakes don't work.

1176
00:52:00,588 --> 00:52:02,257
Yeah!

1177
00:52:15,210 --> 00:52:17,945
- Well, now what?
- That was rubbish.

1178
00:52:19,193 --> 00:52:21,882
I then said we should
use my brilliant boat

1179
00:52:21,936 --> 00:52:24,552
to tow the cars back
to the reef site,

1180
00:52:24,686 --> 00:52:27,389
which would be quicker
and easier.

1181
00:52:32,289 --> 00:52:35,224
They're in the water!

1182
00:52:37,190 --> 00:52:39,251
Ha-ha! Power!

1183
00:52:39,375 --> 00:52:40,931
Power! Come on!

1184
00:52:42,856 --> 00:52:44,289
Yes!

1185
00:52:44,474 --> 00:52:47,175
Eat my boat, James May!

1186
00:52:50,144 --> 00:52:51,278
Come on!

1187
00:52:55,159 --> 00:52:57,494
Victory is the boat's!

1188
00:53:00,355 --> 00:53:03,081
James May's hopeless plan...

1189
00:53:04,393 --> 00:53:05,800
What was that?

1190
00:53:07,663 --> 00:53:10,510
With two rusty Peugeots
in his swimming area

1191
00:53:10,565 --> 00:53:12,768
and his beach furniture
in ruins,

1192
00:53:12,902 --> 00:53:15,097
the hotel manager had had enough

1193
00:53:15,159 --> 00:53:16,978
and ordered us to leave.

1194
00:53:18,773 --> 00:53:22,911
We'd now lost four cars,
a boat and our raft.

1195
00:53:23,182 --> 00:53:26,291
But on the plus side,
we still had one car left,

1196
00:53:26,400 --> 00:53:29,784
and most importantly,
the crane boat.

1197
00:53:30,612 --> 00:53:33,534
But that night,
there was bad news.

1198
00:53:37,760 --> 00:53:41,478
The man who owns it
is not best pleased with us.

1199
00:53:41,744 --> 00:53:44,608
- Because?
- He has off-hired it.

1200
00:53:44,737 --> 00:53:47,536
- We've not got the crane boat?
- No.

1201
00:53:47,697 --> 00:53:51,014
- That was the most useful thing we had.
- Yeah.

1202
00:53:51,128 --> 00:53:54,909
So what can we possibly do
with a Land Rover?

1203
00:53:55,206 --> 00:53:57,425
- Well...
- Well, what?

1204
00:53:57,449 --> 00:53:59,135
If I can be positive...

1205
00:53:59,625 --> 00:54:01,510
The Land Rover's
largely aluminium,

1206
00:54:01,659 --> 00:54:03,994
which is actually even better
for creating a reef.

1207
00:54:04,123 --> 00:54:05,659
- True.
- But it's on the land!

1208
00:54:05,766 --> 00:54:08,034
Yes, it is true.
The Land Rover is...

1209
00:54:08,119 --> 00:54:09,978
It's irrelevant.
We've lost everything else.

1210
00:54:10,027 --> 00:54:12,534
Yes, but it's good if...

1211
00:54:14,563 --> 00:54:16,041
I've had a brainwave.

1212
00:54:16,326 --> 00:54:17,760
Oh, God.

1213
00:54:20,612 --> 00:54:22,579
And so, the next morning,

1214
00:54:22,605 --> 00:54:24,565
the people of Barbados
were treated

1215
00:54:24,608 --> 00:54:26,342
to the magnificent spectacle

1216
00:54:26,641 --> 00:54:29,108
of a Land Rover
gliding majestically

1217
00:54:29,186 --> 00:54:30,858
on a bed of inner tubes

1218
00:54:30,969 --> 00:54:33,581
across the Caribbean Sea.

1219
00:54:33,858 --> 00:54:36,438
Here we are on our final car,
and it's a classic.

1220
00:54:36,601 --> 00:54:38,063
It's a Series I Land Rover.

1221
00:54:38,101 --> 00:54:39,601
No, it's a Series II.

1222
00:54:39,722 --> 00:54:41,601
It's a Series I. The lights
are close together.

1223
00:54:41,664 --> 00:54:43,456
No, it's got the barrel
rolls on the doors.

1224
00:54:43,507 --> 00:54:44,750
It's a Series II.

1225
00:54:44,827 --> 00:54:46,438
- That makes it a Series II?
- Yeah.

1226
00:54:46,516 --> 00:54:48,273
I thought Series Ils
had the lights angled.

1227
00:54:48,405 --> 00:54:49,806
I think we're getting
stuck on this.

1228
00:54:49,898 --> 00:54:51,789
- It's a Land Rover.
- It's an old Land Rover.

1229
00:54:51,851 --> 00:54:52,938
The good thing about it is

1230
00:54:53,038 --> 00:54:55,070
it corrodes much less
quickly than the steel car.

1231
00:54:55,179 --> 00:54:57,914
We've also glued these limestone
tiles to it,

1232
00:54:57,983 --> 00:55:01,952
because porous limestone is
the perfect base, foundation,

1233
00:55:02,101 --> 00:55:03,617
for coral to start a reef.

1234
00:55:03,789 --> 00:55:06,766
This is a coral-reef-making
machine.

1235
00:55:07,016 --> 00:55:10,050
In fact, the only fly
in the ointment

1236
00:55:10,195 --> 00:55:12,952
was its propulsion system.

1237
00:55:13,155 --> 00:55:15,789
- Can I go a bit faster?
- No!

1238
00:55:15,891 --> 00:55:17,925
It's filling with
water the faster you go.

1239
00:55:17,927 --> 00:55:19,360
We'll sink it
in the wrong place.

1240
00:55:19,360 --> 00:55:22,797
This is our last car,
our last chance.

1241
00:55:23,148 --> 00:55:25,875
They're bleating on.
"Oh, don't go too fast!"

1242
00:55:26,014 --> 00:55:28,637
You're going faster
again, Jeremy!

1243
00:55:28,851 --> 00:55:30,601
You're pulling it under!

1244
00:55:31,172 --> 00:55:32,445
Relax!

1245
00:55:32,646 --> 00:55:34,382
Am I
the same species as that?

1246
00:55:34,407 --> 00:55:35,266
No.

1247
00:55:35,306 --> 00:55:37,686
Jeremy, don't sink it

1248
00:55:37,726 --> 00:55:39,547
before we get there!

1249
00:55:39,719 --> 00:55:42,025
Mother of God!
Have you seen that?

1250
00:55:42,179 --> 00:55:43,652
- What?
- Guys, look!

1251
00:55:43,867 --> 00:55:46,856
- Oh, my God!
- Holy cow! Look at it!

1252
00:55:47,956 --> 00:55:49,925
That is phenomenal!

1253
00:55:50,043 --> 00:55:52,043
Yeah! Racing!

1254
00:55:52,137 --> 00:55:54,896
Jeremy, you're going to
sink us! Don't race it!

1255
00:55:54,996 --> 00:55:57,800
Catch the... Oh, I haven't
got time for these two.

1256
00:55:57,967 --> 00:56:01,873
Right. Let's go catch
that sailing boat!

1257
00:56:03,041 --> 00:56:05,110
Oh, brilliant!

1258
00:56:05,135 --> 00:56:09,784
♪♪

1259
00:56:09,807 --> 00:56:14,135
♪♪

1260
00:56:14,159 --> 00:56:17,260
♪♪

1261
00:56:17,351 --> 00:56:19,612
Watch this, sunshine.

1262
00:56:19,635 --> 00:56:23,010
♪♪

1263
00:56:23,221 --> 00:56:24,862
That is the fastest thing
I've...

1264
00:56:24,947 --> 00:56:27,666
Why is it faster than me?

1265
00:56:27,690 --> 00:56:31,018
♪♪

1266
00:56:31,041 --> 00:56:34,768
♪♪

1267
00:56:34,806 --> 00:56:38,697
They're so good, breeze is
beating brake horsepower.

1268
00:56:38,740 --> 00:56:40,724
I cannot keep up with it.

1269
00:56:44,769 --> 00:56:47,121
When do we drink
our own urine?

1270
00:56:47,615 --> 00:56:49,318
Look at that thing now!

1271
00:56:49,342 --> 00:56:52,996
♪♪

1272
00:56:53,021 --> 00:56:57,418
♪♪

1273
00:56:57,492 --> 00:56:58,981
Bloody Nora!

1274
00:56:59,005 --> 00:57:02,340
♪♪

1275
00:57:02,434 --> 00:57:05,465
♪♪

1276
00:57:05,677 --> 00:57:08,677
That is just... fabulous!

1277
00:57:08,701 --> 00:57:12,293
♪♪

1278
00:57:13,817 --> 00:57:16,186
♪♪

1279
00:57:16,269 --> 00:57:19,422
I could have buzzed around
this amazing machine all day,

1280
00:57:19,447 --> 00:57:22,800
but there was still important
environmental work to do.

1281
00:57:22,893 --> 00:57:25,081
So, reluctantly, I broke off

1282
00:57:25,153 --> 00:57:28,043
to rejoin
my stranded colleagues.

1283
00:57:28,965 --> 00:57:32,135
♪♪

1284
00:57:32,260 --> 00:57:34,010
- Are you all right?
- Well, no!

1285
00:57:34,063 --> 00:57:36,760
We've just been left
to drift in a Land Rover!

1286
00:57:36,902 --> 00:57:39,222
Fortunately for you, none of
these ceramic tiles is loose,

1287
00:57:39,268 --> 00:57:41,253
otherwise I'd chuck it
at your head.

1288
00:57:41,277 --> 00:57:44,893
♪♪

1289
00:57:44,918 --> 00:57:48,878
♪♪

1290
00:57:49,010 --> 00:57:50,851
Do you know, I think
it actually handles better

1291
00:57:50,913 --> 00:57:52,543
than it does on land.

1292
00:57:52,722 --> 00:57:55,416
Soon, we will reach
the reef site,

1293
00:57:55,597 --> 00:57:57,418
puncture the inner tubes,
the Land Rover will sink,

1294
00:57:57,443 --> 00:58:00,300
and it will become
a safe haven for cod

1295
00:58:00,349 --> 00:58:04,557
and... haddock and... bream.

1296
00:58:04,581 --> 00:58:06,862
♪♪

1297
00:58:06,920 --> 00:58:08,721
Eventually, we reached the site

1298
00:58:08,753 --> 00:58:11,800
and said about scuttling
our reef machine.

1299
00:58:11,824 --> 00:58:15,871
♪♪

1300
00:58:16,012 --> 00:58:19,536
♪♪

1301
00:58:19,644 --> 00:58:21,614
Fire!

1302
00:58:21,786 --> 00:58:24,346
- Yes!
- Yes!

1303
00:58:28,458 --> 00:58:30,309
Here we go!

1304
00:58:30,474 --> 00:58:32,509
Down! Sink!

1305
00:58:32,643 --> 00:58:34,097
Whoo!

1306
00:58:34,121 --> 00:58:38,242
♪♪

1307
00:58:38,266 --> 00:58:41,389
♪♪

1308
00:58:42,161 --> 00:58:45,077
In truth, all great
environmental projects

1309
00:58:45,164 --> 00:58:47,172
are beset with problems.

1310
00:58:47,268 --> 00:58:50,375
And ours, through no fault
of our own, except James's,

1311
00:58:50,476 --> 00:58:51,945
was no exception.

1312
00:58:54,822 --> 00:58:57,570
Save it! Stop!

1313
00:59:03,853 --> 00:59:05,547
So, in the end, our new reef

1314
00:59:05,639 --> 00:59:08,539
wasn't quite as spectacular
as we'd hoped.

1315
00:59:08,695 --> 00:59:10,117
But it was a start,

1316
00:59:10,202 --> 00:59:12,733
and one day it'll be
the core of something

1317
00:59:12,797 --> 00:59:14,436
a thousand miles long...

1318
00:59:14,597 --> 00:59:16,726
a new and beautiful home

1319
00:59:16,875 --> 00:59:20,726
for the cod and the haddock
of the Caribbean.

1320
00:59:45,376 --> 00:59:46,744
Thank you so much.

1321
00:59:46,815 --> 00:59:49,385
And a very big thank you
to the government of Barbados

1322
00:59:49,440 --> 00:59:50,721
for helping us with that film.

1323
00:59:50,784 --> 00:59:53,806
And we'd just like to say
no coral was damaged

1324
00:59:53,893 --> 00:59:55,346
while we were building our reef.

1325
00:59:55,456 --> 00:59:59,190
No. Or, if we're
perfectly honest, created.

1326
00:59:59,385 --> 01:00:01,342
However, we came back
with a brilliant idea.

1327
01:00:01,431 --> 01:00:03,110
You see, we liked it
in the Caribbean.

1328
01:00:03,144 --> 01:00:05,150
You know, our crews liked it
in the Caribbean.

1329
01:00:05,291 --> 01:00:07,393
So we thought it would be
a good idea, next week,

1330
01:00:07,456 --> 01:00:08,385
to make a film

1331
01:00:08,416 --> 01:00:11,119
comparing the motoring
cultures of the French,

1332
01:00:11,119 --> 01:00:12,534
the Dutch
and the British Islands.

1333
01:00:12,621 --> 01:00:14,626
- Yeah, it was a great idea.
- Brilliant idea.

1334
01:00:14,664 --> 01:00:16,001
But Mr Wilman, our producer,

1335
01:00:16,057 --> 01:00:17,931
he decided it wasn't
a brilliant idea,

1336
01:00:17,956 --> 01:00:18,909
and that, instead,

1337
01:00:18,978 --> 01:00:21,353
we should go to northern
France with three old cars

1338
01:00:21,429 --> 01:00:23,414
and drive around in the rain.

1339
01:00:23,853 --> 01:00:25,298
So that's what
we're actually doing.

1340
01:00:25,346 --> 01:00:27,510
And on that terrible
disappointment, it's time to end.

1341
01:00:27,581 --> 01:00:29,135
Thank you so much for watching.

1342
01:00:29,213 --> 01:00:31,806
Thank you for coming.
See you soon. Take care.

1343
01:00:31,880 --> 01:00:33,411
See you next time.

1344
01:00:33,606 --> 01:00:35,606
Sync corrections done by <font color=#00FF00>srjanapala</font>