1
00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:02,501
Jim, could you
come in here, please?

2
00:00:08,675 --> 00:00:10,409
Hi, Jim.

3
00:00:10,411 --> 00:00:11,410
Hello.

4
00:00:11,412 --> 00:00:14,179
I am Harvey, a computer.

5
00:00:14,181 --> 00:00:17,016
Jim sucks.

6
00:00:17,018 --> 00:00:18,917
Sorry.
Zing.

7
00:00:18,919 --> 00:00:20,219
Oh, wow.

8
00:00:20,221 --> 00:00:21,820
That's so rude.

9
00:00:21,822 --> 00:00:23,322
I'm sorry, I can't control him.

10
00:00:23,324 --> 00:00:24,590
Yeah, you can.

11
00:00:24,592 --> 00:00:26,358
You know what? Get Pam.
For this?

12
00:00:26,360 --> 00:00:27,993
Pam.

13
00:00:29,295 --> 00:00:33,665
Pam, you look very hot today.

14
00:00:35,668 --> 00:00:36,902
Pam, meet Harvey.

15
00:00:36,904 --> 00:00:38,303
This is Michael's new friend.
Great.

16
00:00:38,305 --> 00:00:41,440
Me so horny.
Me love you long tim.

17
00:00:41,442 --> 00:00:42,441
Whoa.

18
00:00:42,443 --> 00:00:44,576
Oh, that is gross!

19
00:00:44,578 --> 00:00:45,844
Who is "Long Tim"?

20
00:00:45,846 --> 00:00:47,479
Damn it.

21
00:00:50,051 --> 00:00:51,050
Long time.

22
00:00:51,052 --> 00:00:52,284
Me love you a long time.

23
00:00:52,286 --> 00:00:54,620
Oh, well, Yoy should
bring Long Tim in one day.

24
00:00:54,622 --> 00:00:55,988
I'd love to meet Long Tim.

25
00:00:55,990 --> 00:00:57,523
Yeah, right?
Yeah.

26
00:00:57,525 --> 00:00:59,058
You ruined a funny joke.

27
00:00:59,060 --> 00:01:01,360
You get out
of my off-five.

28
00:01:01,362 --> 00:01:03,429
Okay.
Okay.

29
00:01:03,431 --> 00:01:04,496
Bye, Harvey.

30
00:01:08,001 --> 00:01:10,602
Boobs.

31
00:01:12,000 --> 00:01:18,074
Support us and become VIP member 
to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org

32
00:01:38,598 --> 00:01:40,232
Angela.
What?

33
00:01:40,234 --> 00:01:43,168
That was a voice mail
that corporate left last night.

34
00:01:43,170 --> 00:01:44,870
They did not get our tax forms.

35
00:01:44,872 --> 00:01:47,606
Did you send them?

36
00:01:47,608 --> 00:01:49,274
They arrived this morning.

37
00:01:49,276 --> 00:01:50,809
Are you sure?

38
00:01:50,811 --> 00:01:52,611
It is a big deal.

39
00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:55,147
Is it a big deal?
Is it, Kevin?

40
00:01:56,883 --> 00:01:58,917
Do you really not know?

41
00:01:58,919 --> 00:02:00,786
Because it is a big deal.

42
00:02:02,088 --> 00:02:04,857
Five of us transferred
from Stamford.

43
00:02:04,859 --> 00:02:05,958
There's two of us left.

44
00:02:05,960 --> 00:02:08,427
Me and Karen.

45
00:02:08,429 --> 00:02:11,330
It's like we're touring
Willy Wonka's chocolate factory,

46
00:02:11,332 --> 00:02:13,932
and dropping off one by one.

47
00:02:13,934 --> 00:02:15,901
Well, guess what.

48
00:02:15,903 --> 00:02:18,570
I'm not falling
in a chocolate river.

49
00:02:24,512 --> 00:02:26,745
Everything okay?

50
00:02:26,747 --> 00:02:28,614
Just fine.

51
00:02:28,616 --> 00:02:29,781
You are in the clear.

52
00:02:29,783 --> 00:02:31,216
Thank you.

53
00:02:36,956 --> 00:02:39,091
I don't...
I don't want those.

54
00:02:41,261 --> 00:02:42,461
Dwight,

55
00:02:42,463 --> 00:02:43,929
care to join us, finally?

56
00:02:43,931 --> 00:02:45,964
Thank you.

57
00:02:45,966 --> 00:02:48,300
Hey, Dwight,
pass the tardy sauce.

58
00:02:48,302 --> 00:02:49,468
Get it, Michael?

59
00:02:49,470 --> 00:02:50,435
Yes.

60
00:02:50,437 --> 00:02:53,839
Okay, here is the dream team.

61
00:02:53,841 --> 00:02:55,774
My sales dream team.

62
00:02:55,776 --> 00:02:57,676
Today we are going to
team up for sales calls.

63
00:02:57,678 --> 00:03:00,078
Andy, since this was your idea,

64
00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:01,079
you get to pick first.

65
00:03:01,081 --> 00:03:03,382
Hmm, well,

66
00:03:03,384 --> 00:03:05,918
let me think about this
for a minute.

67
00:03:05,920 --> 00:03:09,021
Oh, I don't know...
Michael Scott.

68
00:03:09,023 --> 00:03:10,656
Oh.
PhD.

69
00:03:10,658 --> 00:03:12,691
Doctor of sales.

70
00:03:12,693 --> 00:03:13,825
Well, I appreciate that.

71
00:03:13,827 --> 00:03:14,860
That's very gracious of you.

72
00:03:14,862 --> 00:03:17,262
Well it is very gracious
of you to accept.

73
00:03:17,264 --> 00:03:19,531
Well, thank you, sir.

74
00:03:19,533 --> 00:03:22,434
Okay, now going by seniority,

75
00:03:22,436 --> 00:03:24,603
Phyllis, our resident senior.

76
00:03:24,605 --> 00:03:27,139
We're the same age.

77
00:03:27,141 --> 00:03:29,174
And I'll pick Karen.

78
00:03:29,176 --> 00:03:31,643
Oh, uh, thanks.

79
00:03:31,645 --> 00:03:33,478
Good.

80
00:03:33,480 --> 00:03:35,847
Next up, the Super Fly himself,

81
00:03:35,849 --> 00:03:36,848
Stanley.

82
00:03:36,850 --> 00:03:37,916
Pass.

83
00:03:37,918 --> 00:03:40,419
You can't pass.
You gotta pick somebody.

84
00:03:43,590 --> 00:03:46,325
I'll take the kid.

85
00:03:46,327 --> 00:03:47,960
I'm very flattered.

86
00:03:47,962 --> 00:03:51,163
I was his second choice,
after "pass."

87
00:03:51,165 --> 00:03:53,865
So that just leaves
Dwight and Jim.

88
00:03:53,867 --> 00:03:55,667
Okay, wait, does anyone
want to trade?

89
00:03:55,669 --> 00:03:58,303
Yeah, I'll trade.

90
00:03:58,305 --> 00:04:00,472
Dwight and I used to
go on sales calls all the time.

91
00:04:00,474 --> 00:04:04,209
In fact, I have a picture
to remember that time.

92
00:04:04,211 --> 00:04:05,877
Oh, young Jim.

93
00:04:05,879 --> 00:04:09,781
There's just so much
I need to warn you about.

94
00:04:09,783 --> 00:04:14,720
And yet, tragically, I cannot.

95
00:04:14,722 --> 00:04:17,022
Sebring, by Chrysler.

96
00:04:17,024 --> 00:04:19,758
A heck of a motor carriage.

97
00:04:19,760 --> 00:04:22,861
Dwight, here ya go!

98
00:04:22,863 --> 00:04:24,129
Yeah!

99
00:04:24,131 --> 00:04:25,864
You want shirts on hangers?
Please.

100
00:04:25,866 --> 00:04:27,065
He does your laundry?

101
00:04:27,067 --> 00:04:29,735
Long story.

102
00:04:29,737 --> 00:04:30,902
All right, everybody, circle up.

103
00:04:30,904 --> 00:04:33,405
Here we go.

104
00:04:33,407 --> 00:04:35,040
You know that this is?

105
00:04:35,042 --> 00:04:36,608
This is the Amazing Race.

106
00:04:36,610 --> 00:04:38,844
And you guys are
the retired marines.

107
00:04:38,846 --> 00:04:41,580
And you guys are
the mother/daughter.

108
00:04:41,582 --> 00:04:43,415
And you guys are the gay couple.

109
00:04:43,417 --> 00:04:45,384
And we are
the firefighter heroes.

110
00:04:45,386 --> 00:04:46,785
Are we ready to go?

111
00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:50,389
Wait, Amazing Race, like,
the biggest sale wins?

112
00:04:50,391 --> 00:04:52,024
No, we're just gonna rush out,

113
00:04:52,026 --> 00:04:53,425
do the sales thing,
and come back.

114
00:04:53,427 --> 00:04:54,593
Is there a prize?

115
00:04:54,595 --> 00:04:55,794
Just bragging rights.

116
00:04:55,796 --> 00:04:57,195
Then how is this Amazing Race?

117
00:04:57,197 --> 00:04:58,830
It's just... brrrrr.

118
00:04:58,832 --> 00:05:01,566
It's Amazing Race,
Phyllis, okay?

119
00:05:01,568 --> 00:05:03,935
We're in teams of two,
and we are on a mission.

120
00:05:03,937 --> 00:05:06,471
All right, so, on your mark,

121
00:05:06,473 --> 00:05:07,506
get set, go.

122
00:05:07,508 --> 00:05:09,441
Let's do it.
Come on!

123
00:05:14,013 --> 00:05:15,981
Michael...
Whoa, whoa.

124
00:05:15,983 --> 00:05:17,616
Oh, ho ho ho!

125
00:05:17,618 --> 00:05:19,651
Vamanos.
Bueno.

126
00:05:19,653 --> 00:05:22,754
Do you have a pole?

127
00:05:22,756 --> 00:05:24,222
Let's go get a broom.

128
00:05:24,224 --> 00:05:26,892
Seriously, you're gonna sit
in the back?

129
00:05:26,894 --> 00:05:28,093
Uh, yeah.

130
00:05:28,095 --> 00:05:29,594
It's the safest part of a car.

131
00:05:29,596 --> 00:05:30,862
In the event of a crash,

132
00:05:30,864 --> 00:05:33,565
the driver always
protects his side first.

133
00:05:37,770 --> 00:05:40,072
Here we go.
Whoo!

134
00:05:40,074 --> 00:05:41,473
In order to take down Dwight,

135
00:05:41,475 --> 00:05:43,208
I have to chip away at his ally.

136
00:05:43,210 --> 00:05:44,343
In this case, Michael.

137
00:05:44,345 --> 00:05:46,211
And here's the good news.

138
00:05:46,213 --> 00:05:48,113
Every success I've ever had,

139
00:05:48,115 --> 00:05:50,949
in my job, or with
the lady folk,

140
00:05:50,951 --> 00:05:52,918
has come from my ability

141
00:05:52,920 --> 00:05:54,920
to slowly and painfully

142
00:05:54,922 --> 00:05:58,090
wear someone down.

143
00:05:58,092 --> 00:05:59,958
What's the deal with Dwight
doing your laundry?

144
00:05:59,960 --> 00:06:03,595
That is a long story.

145
00:06:03,597 --> 00:06:07,132
Um, a couple months ago,

146
00:06:07,134 --> 00:06:09,901
Dwight tried to
go behind my back with Jan

147
00:06:09,903 --> 00:06:12,037
and get my job.

148
00:06:12,039 --> 00:06:14,973
And I am now having him
do my laundry as punishment.

149
00:06:14,975 --> 00:06:18,009
Wow, that is a long story,

150
00:06:18,011 --> 00:06:20,245
but quite well told, Michael.

151
00:06:20,247 --> 00:06:22,280
I find it very interesting.

152
00:06:22,282 --> 00:06:24,116
Especially the part about Dwight

153
00:06:24,118 --> 00:06:25,717
going behind your back,

154
00:06:25,719 --> 00:06:30,188
and basically being,
like, a terrible person.

155
00:06:30,190 --> 00:06:33,024
You know, if you want
your laundry done right,

156
00:06:33,026 --> 00:06:34,826
I used to work at Abercrombie.

157
00:06:34,828 --> 00:06:37,763
So... pretty good folder.

158
00:06:39,732 --> 00:06:41,133
Why are we turning in here?

159
00:06:41,135 --> 00:06:42,434
This is a beauty salon.

160
00:06:42,436 --> 00:06:44,569
Mm-hmm.

161
00:06:44,571 --> 00:06:46,505
Hey, do you mind
if I take the lead

162
00:06:46,507 --> 00:06:47,506
on this one?

163
00:06:47,508 --> 00:06:49,107
And then, you can
critique me after.

164
00:06:49,109 --> 00:06:50,742
You want the lead?

165
00:06:50,744 --> 00:06:52,110
Yeah, if you don't mind.

166
00:06:52,112 --> 00:06:53,345
Mind?

167
00:06:53,347 --> 00:06:55,113
Nothing would delight me more.

168
00:07:02,622 --> 00:07:04,856
Hey, Pam, would you like
to go with me

169
00:07:04,858 --> 00:07:05,857
to grab a coffee?

170
00:07:05,859 --> 00:07:07,893
Really?

171
00:07:07,895 --> 00:07:09,027
Yeah.

172
00:07:09,029 --> 00:07:10,362
I thought you could use
some fresh air.

173
00:07:10,364 --> 00:07:12,030
It might be fun.

174
00:07:12,032 --> 00:07:13,865
Okay, sure.

175
00:07:13,867 --> 00:07:15,233
Okay.

176
00:07:22,408 --> 00:07:23,742
Leave the keys.

177
00:07:23,744 --> 00:07:25,210
You still do that thing?

178
00:07:25,212 --> 00:07:27,145
Leave the keys.

179
00:07:46,399 --> 00:07:47,999
I think that you have assembled

180
00:07:48,001 --> 00:07:50,535
an amazing team in Scranton.

181
00:07:50,537 --> 00:07:52,170
It's really a pleasure
to be a part of it.

182
00:07:52,172 --> 00:07:54,606
It's like everyone has
their own special skill.

183
00:07:54,608 --> 00:07:57,275
You know, just like
the Super Friends.

184
00:07:57,277 --> 00:07:58,910
Except for Dwight,

185
00:07:58,912 --> 00:08:01,513
who's kind of more of
a super dud.

186
00:08:01,515 --> 00:08:03,415
I mean, he'd be a Super Friend,

187
00:08:03,417 --> 00:08:05,951
if there was a Super Friend
whose super power was

188
00:08:05,953 --> 00:08:07,419
always being late.

189
00:08:07,421 --> 00:08:09,855
You know?

190
00:08:09,857 --> 00:08:12,724
Hawkman.

191
00:08:14,427 --> 00:08:16,761
My plan is taking longer
than I thought.

192
00:08:16,763 --> 00:08:19,297
But I don't give up easily.

193
00:08:19,299 --> 00:08:22,601
I have walked
two marathons, so...

194
00:08:23,837 --> 00:08:26,104
Let's go.

195
00:08:28,508 --> 00:08:31,076
The men's room was disgusting.

196
00:08:34,447 --> 00:08:35,480
After you, sir.

197
00:08:35,482 --> 00:08:36,515
No, thank you.

198
00:08:36,517 --> 00:08:37,616
I never let anyone
walk behind me.

199
00:08:37,618 --> 00:08:39,451
Seven out of ten attacks
are from the rear.

200
00:08:39,453 --> 00:08:40,785
Okay, well, that still leaves

201
00:08:40,787 --> 00:08:42,854
a 30% chance that I'll
attack you from the front.

202
00:08:42,856 --> 00:08:44,789
Yeah, but it'll be
easier to stop.

203
00:08:44,791 --> 00:08:46,291
I can always block the blow.

204
00:08:46,293 --> 00:08:48,326
Or I can counter...

205
00:08:55,401 --> 00:08:57,569
Hey, did you catch that

206
00:08:57,571 --> 00:08:59,070
up in Lake Wallenpaupack?

207
00:08:59,072 --> 00:09:00,305
Yep.

208
00:09:00,307 --> 00:09:02,007
You know, I used to
go up there all the time

209
00:09:02,009 --> 00:09:03,074
with my stepdad,

210
00:09:03,076 --> 00:09:04,809
and I never caught
anything that big.

211
00:09:04,811 --> 00:09:08,980
I caught an 80-pound shark
off Montauk.

212
00:09:08,982 --> 00:09:10,749
It's in the Hamptons.
Uh-huh.

213
00:09:10,751 --> 00:09:13,218
My dad's got
a 42-foot Bayliner.

214
00:09:13,220 --> 00:09:16,621
Sniped it with a rifle
from the crow's nest.

215
00:09:17,790 --> 00:09:19,457
Also shot a deer once.

216
00:09:19,459 --> 00:09:20,959
You know what?
Let's get right down to it.

217
00:09:20,961 --> 00:09:25,163
Dunder-Mifflin may be
just two rooms and a warehouse,

218
00:09:25,165 --> 00:09:26,531
but what we lack in flash,

219
00:09:26,533 --> 00:09:30,468
we will make up for
with hard work and decency...

220
00:09:30,470 --> 00:09:33,305
Okay, this is
the classic undersell.

221
00:09:33,307 --> 00:09:36,041
Because you should know

222
00:09:36,043 --> 00:09:37,542
we don't work
out of a log cabin.

223
00:09:37,544 --> 00:09:39,544
We trade on the New York
Stock Exchange.

224
00:09:39,546 --> 00:09:41,980
Ever heard of it?
It's in New York.

225
00:09:41,982 --> 00:09:44,749
I have to say I'm a little wary

226
00:09:44,751 --> 00:09:46,585
of getting involved
with a big company.

227
00:09:46,587 --> 00:09:48,386
We've had some problems
in the past.

228
00:09:48,388 --> 00:09:52,357
I think what Andy
is trying to express is that

229
00:09:52,359 --> 00:09:54,626
while we have the resources
of a large company,

230
00:09:54,628 --> 00:09:56,595
we will give you
the care and attention

231
00:09:56,597 --> 00:09:58,096
of a small company.

232
00:09:58,098 --> 00:10:00,765
Man, that is like poetry.

233
00:10:00,767 --> 00:10:02,000
No.

234
00:10:02,002 --> 00:10:03,568
I swear, this guy
could sell paper to a tree.

235
00:10:03,570 --> 00:10:04,869
No, stop it.
Stop.

236
00:10:04,871 --> 00:10:06,504
Ow.

237
00:10:06,506 --> 00:10:12,544
Oh, man, talk about
your classic lame-dash-o.

238
00:10:12,546 --> 00:10:15,580
Do we even want that guy
buying our paper?

239
00:10:15,582 --> 00:10:17,849
Yes.

240
00:10:17,851 --> 00:10:20,185
Angela, you seem so happy.

241
00:10:21,754 --> 00:10:24,723
I bet you wish you were
like this all the time.

242
00:10:24,725 --> 00:10:29,494
This friend of mine...
let's call her Noelle.

243
00:10:29,496 --> 00:10:32,364
She missed this deadline

244
00:10:32,366 --> 00:10:34,899
turning something in
to corporate in New York.

245
00:10:34,901 --> 00:10:38,003
But then this gallant
gentleman...

246
00:10:38,005 --> 00:10:39,037
we'll call him Curt.

247
00:10:39,039 --> 00:10:40,872
He drove all the way to New York

248
00:10:40,874 --> 00:10:42,741
and handed it in for her.

249
00:10:42,743 --> 00:10:45,210
Because... I don't know.

250
00:10:45,212 --> 00:10:47,479
I guess he just
really likes her a lot.

251
00:10:47,481 --> 00:10:49,781
Well, that's great.

252
00:10:49,783 --> 00:10:51,616
Yes, it is.

253
00:10:56,455 --> 00:10:57,589
Hello?

254
00:10:57,591 --> 00:11:00,725
I'm...
I'm so sorry, man.

255
00:11:02,962 --> 00:11:04,629
I really screwed that up.

256
00:11:04,631 --> 00:11:05,964
Oh...
Really... no.

257
00:11:05,966 --> 00:11:06,965
Don't worry about it.

258
00:11:06,967 --> 00:11:08,066
I really Schruted it.

259
00:11:08,068 --> 00:11:09,634
What?

260
00:11:09,636 --> 00:11:11,002
Schruted it.

261
00:11:11,004 --> 00:11:13,672
It just this thing people say
around your office all the time.

262
00:11:13,674 --> 00:11:15,306
Like when you screw something up

263
00:11:15,308 --> 00:11:17,542
in a really irreversible way,

264
00:11:17,544 --> 00:11:19,711
you Schruted it.

265
00:11:19,713 --> 00:11:22,113
I don't know where
it comes from, though.

266
00:11:22,115 --> 00:11:24,082
You think it comes
from Dwight Schrute?

267
00:11:24,084 --> 00:11:25,517
I don't know.

268
00:11:25,519 --> 00:11:28,353
Who knows how words are formed?

269
00:11:30,690 --> 00:11:32,057
That's a big order.
Thanks, Ken.

270
00:11:32,059 --> 00:11:33,058
Yeah, thank you.

271
00:11:33,060 --> 00:11:34,159
Hey, how's Annie?

272
00:11:34,161 --> 00:11:35,627
Oh, she's great.

273
00:11:35,629 --> 00:11:40,198
This is us last year in Bermuda.

274
00:11:41,701 --> 00:11:42,701
Lovely place.

275
00:11:42,703 --> 00:11:44,202
You ever been to Bermuda?

276
00:11:44,204 --> 00:11:45,603
Stanley Hudson.

277
00:11:45,605 --> 00:11:47,439
Ah, Julius.
How's it going?

278
00:11:47,441 --> 00:11:49,507
Great, great,
great, great, great.

279
00:11:49,509 --> 00:11:50,942
Stanley, so good to see you.

280
00:11:50,944 --> 00:11:52,277
You too.

281
00:11:52,279 --> 00:11:54,379
I'd like you fellas
to meet Ryan Howard.

282
00:11:54,381 --> 00:11:55,714
Hi.

283
00:11:55,716 --> 00:11:57,716
I'm gonna let Ryan
do a little pitch for you

284
00:11:57,718 --> 00:11:59,084
while I do my crossword puzzle.

285
00:11:59,086 --> 00:12:00,285
Ryan?

286
00:12:03,789 --> 00:12:06,691
Um...

287
00:12:08,694 --> 00:12:09,694
Hi.

288
00:12:09,696 --> 00:12:11,096
Hi.

289
00:12:11,098 --> 00:12:12,564
Hi.

290
00:12:12,566 --> 00:12:13,932
Hello, Ryan.
Hi.

291
00:12:13,934 --> 00:12:16,668
What do you have for us?

292
00:12:16,670 --> 00:12:18,203
Oh...

293
00:12:18,205 --> 00:12:19,671
We can offer
our biggest discounts

294
00:12:19,673 --> 00:12:22,307
on 30% recycled,
and ultra-premium laser.

295
00:12:22,309 --> 00:12:23,475
Okay.
Okay.

296
00:12:23,477 --> 00:12:25,210
Can I use your phone?

297
00:12:25,212 --> 00:12:26,911
Yeah, sure, go ahead.
Thanks.

298
00:12:26,913 --> 00:12:28,113
Let me talk to you about
a few of the other things

299
00:12:28,115 --> 00:12:29,314
we can offer.

300
00:12:29,316 --> 00:12:31,082
Namely, we know
the tax season's coming up.

301
00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:32,917
So by April 1st,
we can have you fully stocked.

302
00:12:32,919 --> 00:12:34,185
One...

303
00:12:34,187 --> 00:12:35,186
Discount prices
on ink cartridges.

304
00:12:35,188 --> 00:12:36,354
Three...

305
00:12:36,356 --> 00:12:37,922
And also any forms
that you're gonna need,

306
00:12:37,924 --> 00:12:41,025
Seven. we can custom make them.

307
00:12:45,165 --> 00:12:48,333
And you just said,
"Hi. Hi. Hi."

308
00:12:50,237 --> 00:12:52,103
You sounded like...

309
00:12:53,673 --> 00:12:54,939
My niece.

310
00:12:54,941 --> 00:12:57,942
And she's six months old.

311
00:12:59,579 --> 00:13:01,112
I appreciate what
you guys are saying,

312
00:13:01,114 --> 00:13:02,313
but it makes more fiscal sense

313
00:13:02,315 --> 00:13:03,648
to go with one of the big guys.

314
00:13:03,650 --> 00:13:04,716
Sure.
That's true.

315
00:13:04,718 --> 00:13:05,784
We can't compete
with their prices.

316
00:13:05,786 --> 00:13:06,818
But let me ask you something.

317
00:13:06,820 --> 00:13:08,887
How important to you
is customer service?

318
00:13:08,889 --> 00:13:10,388
Very.

319
00:13:10,390 --> 00:13:11,422
Please keep holding.

320
00:13:11,424 --> 00:13:13,158
Your call is
very important to us.

321
00:13:13,160 --> 00:13:15,260
That's one
of the "big guys."

322
00:13:15,262 --> 00:13:16,961
Been on hold this whole time.

323
00:13:16,963 --> 00:13:19,497
And this is
Dunder-Mifflin.

324
00:13:21,168 --> 00:13:22,367
Dunder-Mifflin
customer service.

325
00:13:22,369 --> 00:13:24,135
This is Kelly.
Hey, Kelly, it's Jim.

326
00:13:24,137 --> 00:13:26,538
Oh, my God, Jim, how are you?

327
00:13:26,540 --> 00:13:28,139
Here's my card.

328
00:13:28,141 --> 00:13:29,974
It's got my cell number,
my pager number,

329
00:13:29,976 --> 00:13:31,943
my home number,
and my other pager number.

330
00:13:31,945 --> 00:13:33,812
I never take vacations,
I never get sick,

331
00:13:33,814 --> 00:13:35,380
and I don't celebrate
any major holidays.

332
00:13:35,382 --> 00:13:37,382
All right, I get it.

333
00:13:37,384 --> 00:13:38,883
We got a deal.

334
00:13:38,885 --> 00:13:40,018
All right.

335
00:13:40,020 --> 00:13:41,319
Thanks, that was fun.

336
00:13:41,321 --> 00:13:42,420
Yeah.

337
00:13:42,422 --> 00:13:43,922
I really enjoy
spending time with you.

338
00:13:43,924 --> 00:13:45,256
You're a very nice person.

339
00:13:45,258 --> 00:13:46,357
Thank you.

340
00:13:46,359 --> 00:13:48,660
And I'm so glad you're with Jim.

341
00:13:48,662 --> 00:13:52,297
He was hung up on Pam
for such a long time.

342
00:13:52,299 --> 00:13:54,999
I didn't think
he'd ever get over her.

343
00:13:57,870 --> 00:14:00,805
That's nice.

344
00:14:00,807 --> 00:14:05,210
You can pay me back later
for the makeover.

345
00:14:10,249 --> 00:14:11,416
Whew!

346
00:14:11,418 --> 00:14:12,750
Hey, boss.

347
00:14:13,920 --> 00:14:15,653
- Got a minute?
- Yes, Andy.

348
00:14:15,655 --> 00:14:17,989
I forget, why did Dwight say
he was late this morning?

349
00:14:17,991 --> 00:14:18,990
He didn't say.

350
00:14:18,992 --> 00:14:20,225
That's weird.

351
00:14:20,227 --> 00:14:21,960
Because I was just walking
past his desk,

352
00:14:21,962 --> 00:14:24,929
and I saw this, which is
a toll booth receipt

353
00:14:24,931 --> 00:14:26,631
from New York City,

354
00:14:26,633 --> 00:14:30,702
stamped really early
this morning.

355
00:14:30,704 --> 00:14:32,670
Why would Dwight go to New York

356
00:14:32,672 --> 00:14:35,240
without telling anyone?

357
00:14:35,242 --> 00:14:36,641
You think he went to see Jan?

358
00:14:36,643 --> 00:14:38,743
That's not like him.

359
00:14:38,745 --> 00:14:40,845
Is it?

360
00:14:40,847 --> 00:14:43,081
Someone told me a story
about this,

361
00:14:43,083 --> 00:14:47,652
with, like, laundry
and betrayal.

362
00:14:47,654 --> 00:14:49,687
Did you betray Dwight,

363
00:14:49,689 --> 00:14:52,023
and try to steal his job
or something?

364
00:14:52,025 --> 00:14:56,327
No, you are
remembering it wrong.

365
00:14:56,329 --> 00:14:58,696
Dwight betrayed me once before.

366
00:14:58,698 --> 00:15:01,666
So this is his strike two.

367
00:15:01,668 --> 00:15:03,501
You know what they say.

368
00:15:03,503 --> 00:15:05,837
Fool me once, strike one.

369
00:15:05,839 --> 00:15:09,707
But fool me twice...

370
00:15:09,709 --> 00:15:12,277
strike three.

371
00:15:14,346 --> 00:15:16,447
I like Karen.
She's pretty.

372
00:15:16,449 --> 00:15:18,917
Appears intelligent.

373
00:15:18,919 --> 00:15:21,152
Well, I like pretty women

374
00:15:21,154 --> 00:15:24,656
who have the appearance
of intelligence.

375
00:15:24,658 --> 00:15:27,458
My girlfriend is also
beautiful and smart.

376
00:15:27,460 --> 00:15:31,229
She could be a model,
or a college professor

377
00:15:31,231 --> 00:15:34,432
which is intimidating
to a lot of guys.

378
00:15:34,434 --> 00:15:36,567
We should go on a double date.

379
00:15:36,569 --> 00:15:39,704
No, thank you.

380
00:15:39,706 --> 00:15:42,440
Dwight's name is on
the security sign-in sheet,

381
00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:45,543
but I don't know
who he met with.

382
00:15:45,545 --> 00:15:47,612
And where it asks you
to state your business,

383
00:15:47,614 --> 00:15:49,814
he wrote
"Beeswax Not Yours, Inc."

384
00:15:49,816 --> 00:15:50,915
I knew it.

385
00:15:54,887 --> 00:15:57,522
Oooooh, doggy.

386
00:15:57,524 --> 00:15:58,856
Hey,

387
00:15:58,858 --> 00:16:00,358
you wanna grab a coffee?

388
00:16:00,360 --> 00:16:02,360
Sure.

389
00:16:02,362 --> 00:16:04,128
Look at you.

390
00:16:04,130 --> 00:16:06,731
Yeah.

391
00:16:09,168 --> 00:16:11,536
Hey, we nailed the sale.

392
00:16:11,538 --> 00:16:13,671
Where were you this morning?

393
00:16:13,673 --> 00:16:16,040
I overslept.
Damn rooster didn't crow.

394
00:16:16,042 --> 00:16:18,343
Why do you lie, liar?

395
00:16:18,345 --> 00:16:19,377
I am not a liar.

396
00:16:19,379 --> 00:16:20,845
You are lying right now.

397
00:16:20,847 --> 00:16:22,146
Sure seems like he's lying.

398
00:16:22,148 --> 00:16:23,848
Stay out of this, you.

399
00:16:23,850 --> 00:16:25,717
I know that you went
to corporate this morning.

400
00:16:25,719 --> 00:16:29,087
And I know that you lied
about it.

401
00:16:29,089 --> 00:16:30,888
And given our history...

402
00:16:30,890 --> 00:16:33,658
I need you to tell me right now

403
00:16:33,660 --> 00:16:36,294
exactly what you were doing
this morning.

404
00:16:36,296 --> 00:16:39,497
Michael, I cannot tell you
what I was doing there.

405
00:16:39,499 --> 00:16:40,932
But you have to trust me.

406
00:16:40,934 --> 00:16:42,900
I would never do anything
to hurt you

407
00:16:42,902 --> 00:16:44,168
or this company.

408
00:16:44,170 --> 00:16:45,303
Okay, you know what?

409
00:16:45,305 --> 00:16:46,871
I want you to think
about your future

410
00:16:46,873 --> 00:16:47,972
at this company.

411
00:16:47,974 --> 00:16:50,108
I want you to think about it
long and hard.

412
00:16:50,110 --> 00:16:51,109
That's what she said.

413
00:16:51,111 --> 00:16:52,377
Don't you dare.

414
00:16:55,447 --> 00:16:57,915
I want to know what
you were doing this morning

415
00:16:57,917 --> 00:16:59,884
by the end of the day.

416
00:17:04,790 --> 00:17:07,258
It's gonna be okay.

417
00:17:07,260 --> 00:17:09,527
How's it gonna be okay, Dwight?

418
00:17:09,529 --> 00:17:11,462
Everyone will know our business.

419
00:17:11,464 --> 00:17:13,931
That's not the worst thing
in the world.

420
00:17:13,933 --> 00:17:16,167
I'll just stand up
in front of the office,

421
00:17:16,169 --> 00:17:19,003
and reveal our true love.

422
00:17:19,005 --> 00:17:20,772
It won't be that bad.

423
00:17:20,774 --> 00:17:22,473
Look at Kelly and Ryan.

424
00:17:22,475 --> 00:17:24,008
I hate those two people

425
00:17:24,010 --> 00:17:25,843
more than anything
in the entire world.

426
00:17:27,180 --> 00:17:30,615
Well, I don't have
a lot of choices.

427
00:17:30,617 --> 00:17:32,683
So let me ask you a question.

428
00:17:32,685 --> 00:17:33,885
Okay.

429
00:17:33,887 --> 00:17:35,987
Did you ever have a thing
for Pam?

430
00:17:35,989 --> 00:17:37,989
Pam?

431
00:17:37,991 --> 00:17:40,291
Did I ever have a thing for her?

432
00:17:40,293 --> 00:17:42,026
No.

433
00:17:42,028 --> 00:17:44,695
Why, did she say something?

434
00:17:44,697 --> 00:17:47,698
I moved here from Connecticut.

435
00:17:47,700 --> 00:17:49,434
Yeah...

436
00:17:49,436 --> 00:17:53,671
Okay, here's the...

437
00:17:53,673 --> 00:17:57,475
I had... a crush on her

438
00:17:57,477 --> 00:17:59,844
before I left.

439
00:17:59,846 --> 00:18:00,978
And I told her about it,

440
00:18:00,980 --> 00:18:03,181
and she didn't feel
the same way.

441
00:18:03,183 --> 00:18:04,816
So it didn't amount to anything,

442
00:18:04,818 --> 00:18:06,717
and I left.

443
00:18:09,455 --> 00:18:12,190
I'm really glad you're here.

444
00:18:12,192 --> 00:18:14,292
Okay?

445
00:18:14,294 --> 00:18:16,894
Okay.

446
00:18:20,232 --> 00:18:21,332
Ahem.

447
00:18:21,334 --> 00:18:25,503
May I have
your attention, please?

448
00:18:25,505 --> 00:18:29,373
This will only take a moment
of your time.

449
00:18:29,375 --> 00:18:31,142
Although I love this company

450
00:18:31,144 --> 00:18:32,743
more than almost
anything in the world,

451
00:18:32,745 --> 00:18:35,513
I have decided
to step down from my post

452
00:18:35,515 --> 00:18:37,315
and spend more time
with my family.

453
00:18:37,317 --> 00:18:39,617
I do not fear the unknown.

454
00:18:39,619 --> 00:18:41,586
I will meet my new challenges
head on,

455
00:18:41,588 --> 00:18:43,154
and I will succeed.

456
00:18:43,156 --> 00:18:45,923
And I will laugh in the faces
of those who doubt me.

457
00:18:45,925 --> 00:18:48,926
It's been a pleasure
working with some of you,

458
00:18:48,928 --> 00:18:51,162
and I will not forget
those of you soon.

459
00:18:51,164 --> 00:18:54,165
But remember,
while today it is me,

460
00:18:54,167 --> 00:18:57,668
we all shall fall.

461
00:19:01,640 --> 00:19:03,508
In other words, I'm quitting.

462
00:19:03,510 --> 00:19:05,109
So...

463
00:19:24,230 --> 00:19:29,400
I would like to give
the rest of my belongings...

464
00:19:29,402 --> 00:19:30,635
to Michael Scott.

465
00:19:31,803 --> 00:19:33,671
Just take it.

466
00:19:33,673 --> 00:19:34,972
Except this.

467
00:19:34,974 --> 00:19:36,607
Good luck.

468
00:19:36,609 --> 00:19:38,876
And this one.
Oops.

469
00:19:40,979 --> 00:19:43,581
Dwight will be missed.

470
00:19:43,583 --> 00:19:46,417
Not by me... so much.

471
00:19:46,419 --> 00:19:49,220
But he will be missed.

472
00:19:49,222 --> 00:19:52,690
Dwight... from sales...

473
00:19:52,692 --> 00:19:55,393
was one of the most honorable
and efficient employees

474
00:19:55,395 --> 00:19:57,762
this company has ever had.

475
00:19:57,764 --> 00:20:00,364
One of my life goals
was to die right here,

476
00:20:00,366 --> 00:20:02,533
in my desk chair.

477
00:20:02,535 --> 00:20:10,007
And today,
that dream was shattered.

478
00:20:10,009 --> 00:20:11,409
Hey, man.

479
00:20:25,257 --> 00:20:26,991
What happened
on your sales call?

480
00:20:29,661 --> 00:20:32,763
Um, am I happy about
the way things turned out?

481
00:20:32,765 --> 00:20:37,001
Well, happy's such an ugly word.

482
00:20:37,003 --> 00:20:40,471
But I saw what needed
to be done,

483
00:20:40,473 --> 00:20:41,639
and I did it.

484
00:20:41,641 --> 00:20:43,241
And now I'm thrilled.

485
00:20:43,243 --> 00:20:45,209
So it's pretty...

486
00:20:45,211 --> 00:20:47,478
Hello?

487
00:20:47,480 --> 00:20:49,213
Pretty good.

487
00:20:50,305 --> 00:21:50,426
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