1 00:00:06,983 --> 00:00:08,815 Hello, this is Dwight Schrute. 2 00:00:09,116 --> 00:00:10,847 - Hello? - Hello, this is Dwight. 3 00:00:11,945 --> 00:00:13,192 Hello? Hello? 4 00:00:13,312 --> 00:00:15,810 Yes, we do have that. Hold on one second. 5 00:00:15,970 --> 00:00:18,319 - Jim what are you doing? - And how many would you like? 6 00:00:18,439 --> 00:00:20,857 - Hang that up right now. - I can get that out to you immediately. 7 00:00:21,236 --> 00:00:24,610 It's an imposter. Don't do business with him, this is not Dwight Schrute. 8 00:00:24,772 --> 00:00:26,950 Dwight left his cell phone on his desk. 9 00:00:27,070 --> 00:00:29,810 So, naturally, I paired it to my headset. 10 00:00:31,986 --> 00:00:34,036 Okay, fine, I'll just let it go to voice mail. 11 00:00:36,987 --> 00:00:39,042 - Hello, this is Dwight. - Hey, is this Dwight? 12 00:00:39,202 --> 00:00:41,628 - Yes, it is. - Oh, my goodness, you sound sexy. 13 00:00:41,789 --> 00:00:43,371 Thank you. I've been working out. 14 00:00:44,542 --> 00:00:46,925 You're not talking to Dwight right now. You're talking to Jim. 15 00:00:49,233 --> 00:00:50,583 Pam, I'm over here. 16 00:00:50,703 --> 00:00:51,929 I'm confused. 17 00:00:52,091 --> 00:00:53,472 Disconnect that right now. 18 00:00:53,753 --> 00:00:56,809 - You give me your earpiece. - I can't do that. Unsanitary. 19 00:00:59,191 --> 00:01:00,270 You know what, fine. 20 00:01:00,449 --> 00:01:04,158 I will reprogram my phone to go to my office phone. 21 00:01:07,035 --> 00:01:08,162 Done. 22 00:01:12,037 --> 00:01:13,174 This is Dwight. 23 00:01:13,294 --> 00:01:15,847 And I forwarded his desk phone to mine. 24 00:01:16,945 --> 00:01:20,416 Oh, hello, mater. Good news, I've married. Tell fater. 25 00:01:22,011 --> 00:01:23,361 Such a nice woman. 26 00:01:35,717 --> 00:01:38,435 Transcript: SwSub Sync: DarKsh 27 00:01:48,836 --> 00:01:50,572 Episode 4x14 "GOODBYE, TOBY" (1.00) 28 00:01:51,454 --> 00:01:52,534 Today 29 00:01:52,654 --> 00:01:56,022 is Toby Flenderson's last day. 30 00:01:56,254 --> 00:01:57,578 I couldn't sleep last night. 31 00:01:57,886 --> 00:01:59,371 I came in extra early. 32 00:01:59,765 --> 00:02:01,015 So much energy. 33 00:02:01,135 --> 00:02:04,285 There are certain days that you know you'll remember the rest of your life. 34 00:02:04,405 --> 00:02:08,476 And I just have a feeling that today is one of those days. 35 00:02:08,976 --> 00:02:10,491 - Morning. - Mornin'. 36 00:02:11,262 --> 00:02:13,331 So here we go. Just a matter of hours now 37 00:02:13,451 --> 00:02:16,201 until his horribleness has left the building. 38 00:02:16,511 --> 00:02:18,718 I'm going to set my watch alarm... 39 00:02:19,391 --> 00:02:20,820 And... 40 00:02:22,736 --> 00:02:23,979 Good morning, Kelly. 41 00:02:25,015 --> 00:02:27,649 I can't believe this is your last day. How do you feel? 42 00:02:27,810 --> 00:02:29,326 Fine. Good. 43 00:02:29,765 --> 00:02:30,915 I feel weird. 44 00:02:31,373 --> 00:02:34,527 First thing on the agenda. Actually, the only thing on the agenda 45 00:02:34,647 --> 00:02:36,617 is that status of Toby's going away party. 46 00:02:36,778 --> 00:02:39,745 We have a buttercream cake and a slide show of Toby. 47 00:02:40,473 --> 00:02:42,711 But so far we only have two pictures of him. 48 00:02:43,186 --> 00:02:45,205 Okay, well, this will not do. 49 00:02:45,429 --> 00:02:48,646 Toby is going away forever, 50 00:02:48,890 --> 00:02:51,583 and we need to do something very, very special. 51 00:02:51,703 --> 00:02:54,636 In some cultures, when somebody leaves, like New Orleans culture, 52 00:02:54,797 --> 00:02:56,961 they have a parade, and they have a band. 53 00:02:57,081 --> 00:02:58,781 And people party in the streets. 54 00:02:58,901 --> 00:03:00,948 Do you mean leaves as in dies? 55 00:03:01,068 --> 00:03:03,310 You want us to throw Toby a New Orleans funeral? 56 00:03:03,643 --> 00:03:06,834 If the devil were to explode, 57 00:03:06,954 --> 00:03:10,954 and evil were gone forever, what sort of party would you have? 58 00:03:11,146 --> 00:03:13,404 - Michael... - Like a beach blowout? 59 00:03:13,565 --> 00:03:15,126 - Or a toga... - No, you know... No! 60 00:03:15,246 --> 00:03:16,782 - Toga! - You always do this. 61 00:03:17,143 --> 00:03:19,369 We have a nice, modest party planned, 62 00:03:19,529 --> 00:03:21,245 and you come in and demand the world. 63 00:03:21,406 --> 00:03:22,440 Let me be clear. 64 00:03:22,560 --> 00:03:25,085 There is simply no money for anything other than a cake, 65 00:03:25,205 --> 00:03:27,337 and to develop a few more slides. 66 00:03:27,457 --> 00:03:28,877 Although Toby won't be in them. 67 00:03:30,318 --> 00:03:32,311 I thought that you might say that. 68 00:03:38,024 --> 00:03:41,523 Every year, my sweet, sweet grandmother 69 00:03:41,643 --> 00:03:44,712 sends me a check on my birthday for $50. 70 00:03:44,832 --> 00:03:47,382 And lately she has been... 71 00:03:47,798 --> 00:03:50,528 sending me, like, nine or ten checks a year. 72 00:03:51,294 --> 00:03:54,047 As Nana starts to... 73 00:03:54,167 --> 00:03:56,924 But I knew I should be saving it for something. 74 00:03:57,044 --> 00:03:59,770 I just didn't know what I should be saving it for. 75 00:03:59,988 --> 00:04:01,735 And then I had an awakening. 76 00:04:01,855 --> 00:04:04,214 Michael, buy a motorcycle. 77 00:04:04,931 --> 00:04:08,648 So I put the money in my shoe, and then I forgot about it until now. 78 00:04:09,495 --> 00:04:12,297 I want a party that makes me feel like I'm flying through the air 79 00:04:13,044 --> 00:04:16,968 without this... ugly weight holding me down. 80 00:04:17,272 --> 00:04:18,358 You know? 81 00:04:19,782 --> 00:04:22,973 I want an antigravity machine. I saw it in a movie. 82 00:04:23,251 --> 00:04:25,852 You drink a potion, and then you just start floating all around. 83 00:04:26,359 --> 00:04:28,479 So how much antigravity potion do you want? 84 00:04:28,639 --> 00:04:31,113 No, you know what? This is not a party-planning committee anymore. 85 00:04:31,233 --> 00:04:34,860 And I don't want your foot money, and I feel uncomfortable participating. 86 00:04:36,343 --> 00:04:37,422 Phyllis. 87 00:04:38,171 --> 00:04:39,198 Can you do this? 88 00:04:42,358 --> 00:04:43,358 Yes. 89 00:04:50,233 --> 00:04:52,116 - Hi, can I help you? - Hi, yes. 90 00:04:52,236 --> 00:04:54,880 I'm Holly Flax. I was told to ask for Mr. Flenderson. 91 00:04:55,045 --> 00:04:56,399 As part of my last day, 92 00:04:56,519 --> 00:05:00,234 I'm training the new human resources rep in the ways of the company. 93 00:05:01,287 --> 00:05:03,514 Again, the company has allotted for this training... 94 00:05:04,005 --> 00:05:05,006 one day. 95 00:05:06,057 --> 00:05:08,561 So this is H.R. This is your desk. 96 00:05:09,018 --> 00:05:10,177 I love the view. 97 00:05:10,297 --> 00:05:12,336 Yeah, it's great, isn't it? 98 00:05:22,047 --> 00:05:22,851 Hey. 99 00:05:23,673 --> 00:05:24,474 Hey. 100 00:05:30,955 --> 00:05:31,988 What? 101 00:05:32,564 --> 00:05:34,586 Guess who just got into the Pratt school of design. 102 00:05:34,747 --> 00:05:35,969 No way! 103 00:05:36,089 --> 00:05:38,508 What'd I say? I said that they'd love those sketches. 104 00:05:38,668 --> 00:05:40,009 - Congrats. - Oh, thank you. 105 00:05:40,376 --> 00:05:43,096 I don't know why I doubted it. Because I'm so clearly awesome. 106 00:05:43,257 --> 00:05:45,223 Yes. So when do you start? 107 00:05:45,384 --> 00:05:48,491 I didn't read it carefully. I just saw "congratulations," and skimmed the list. 108 00:05:48,611 --> 00:05:50,894 I saw my name, I came in here to tell you and get a snack. 109 00:05:52,479 --> 00:05:53,709 Busy morning. 110 00:05:54,738 --> 00:05:55,619 So... 111 00:05:56,363 --> 00:05:59,278 you know, it means I have to go to New York for three months. 112 00:05:59,737 --> 00:06:01,947 It's not a big deal. I'll come visit you. 113 00:06:02,168 --> 00:06:05,313 And you'll visit me. It's only two hours away. It'll be fine. 114 00:06:05,433 --> 00:06:08,578 - It's gonna suck, but it'll be great. - Yeah, it sucks, but it'll be great. 115 00:06:08,900 --> 00:06:10,080 See how easy that is? 116 00:06:13,161 --> 00:06:15,807 I wouldn't go if things weren't so solid with Jim. 117 00:06:15,927 --> 00:06:19,365 And down the road, if we have a family, I couldn't go then either. 118 00:06:19,489 --> 00:06:21,601 So the timing's perfect. 119 00:06:23,130 --> 00:06:26,953 And that is the first time I've ever used the word "perfect" in here. 120 00:06:27,494 --> 00:06:28,660 Hey, Stanley. 121 00:06:28,953 --> 00:06:30,309 I want to introduce you to... 122 00:06:30,429 --> 00:06:31,943 Toby's replacement. 123 00:06:34,599 --> 00:06:36,119 So what do we know about her? 124 00:06:36,239 --> 00:06:39,967 Well, we know that Toby thinks she'll be great. 125 00:06:40,432 --> 00:06:42,556 Oh, strike one. I hate her already. 126 00:06:42,676 --> 00:06:43,926 I hate her too. 127 00:06:44,178 --> 00:06:45,628 Why do you hate her? 128 00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:47,367 Because she... 129 00:06:47,870 --> 00:06:49,007 stinks... 130 00:06:49,364 --> 00:06:52,081 with her ways and her... 131 00:06:52,911 --> 00:06:53,955 head. 132 00:06:56,412 --> 00:06:57,961 You know, Dwight, sometimes... 133 00:06:59,301 --> 00:07:02,327 I don't know, I think you say things just to agree with me. 134 00:07:02,447 --> 00:07:04,719 - Would that be such a bad thing? - Yeah, it would. 135 00:07:04,879 --> 00:07:06,803 Just have a thought. Have an original thought! 136 00:07:08,582 --> 00:07:11,308 Although I will agree that her head is weird. 137 00:07:12,385 --> 00:07:14,545 - You know what we need to do? - What? 138 00:07:14,972 --> 00:07:18,464 - We need to sell her an elevator pass. - But our elevator doesn't require a... 139 00:07:19,268 --> 00:07:20,430 Exactly. 140 00:07:20,644 --> 00:07:22,460 A little old-fashioned hazing. 141 00:07:22,814 --> 00:07:27,282 Hi, are there any local companies that rent antigravity machines? 142 00:07:27,744 --> 00:07:30,369 - Antigravity machines? - That's right, yeah. 143 00:07:30,489 --> 00:07:31,995 What do they do, exactly? 144 00:07:32,619 --> 00:07:34,469 They make you feel lighter. 145 00:07:34,953 --> 00:07:36,876 Antigravity... 146 00:07:37,993 --> 00:07:41,582 Antidepressant? I could put you through to someone on that. 147 00:07:42,784 --> 00:07:43,591 Okay. 148 00:07:44,180 --> 00:07:44,986 Yeah. 149 00:07:45,869 --> 00:07:48,179 - Hey, Michael? - Oh, hey, do you still work here? 150 00:07:48,340 --> 00:07:50,522 I'd like to introduce you to my replacement. 151 00:07:50,642 --> 00:07:52,189 - Come on. - No. I think I'll pass. 152 00:07:52,309 --> 00:07:53,787 Michael Scott, this is Holly. 153 00:07:53,907 --> 00:07:55,336 - Hi. - Hi, yeah, right. 154 00:07:55,456 --> 00:07:57,312 Okay, well, they hired a female Toby. 155 00:07:57,746 --> 00:07:59,690 Good for the world. Thank you, god, for... 156 00:08:00,191 --> 00:08:03,688 creating two of you. Here's how things work here. 157 00:08:03,808 --> 00:08:08,281 My job is to make the office fun, your job is to make the office lame. 158 00:08:08,679 --> 00:08:10,625 And we have an eternal struggle, 159 00:08:10,745 --> 00:08:11,743 you and I. 160 00:08:12,060 --> 00:08:16,015 And only one of us can be the winner. Spoiler alert... I'm gonna win. 161 00:08:17,656 --> 00:08:19,167 Man, someone doesn't like H.R. 162 00:08:20,590 --> 00:08:21,590 Yeah. 163 00:08:22,112 --> 00:08:23,713 - What did you do to him? - Nothing. 164 00:08:23,874 --> 00:08:25,778 T... No, he tortured me... 165 00:08:26,396 --> 00:08:27,915 with his awfulness. 166 00:08:28,717 --> 00:08:29,991 Yeah, I know what you mean. 167 00:08:30,111 --> 00:08:32,973 I nearly fell asleep when he gave me a tour of the files. 168 00:08:35,740 --> 00:08:37,721 Well, look, I'll let you get back to work, 169 00:08:37,841 --> 00:08:40,063 but I really look forward to working with you, Mr. Scott. 170 00:08:41,783 --> 00:08:43,327 You can p... Michael. 171 00:08:46,189 --> 00:08:48,535 Thanks to Toby, I have a very strong prejudice 172 00:08:48,655 --> 00:08:50,158 against human resources. 173 00:08:50,319 --> 00:08:53,696 I believe that the department is a breeding ground for monsters. 174 00:08:53,987 --> 00:08:57,977 What I failed to consider, though, is that not all monsters are bad. 175 00:08:58,716 --> 00:08:59,859 Like E.T. 176 00:09:01,405 --> 00:09:04,124 Is Holly our extraterrestrial? 177 00:09:04,780 --> 00:09:05,780 Maybe. 178 00:09:06,903 --> 00:09:10,093 Or maybe she's just an awesome woman from this planet. 179 00:09:11,297 --> 00:09:13,493 - The pleasure is all mine. - Oh, thanks. 180 00:09:13,613 --> 00:09:16,329 I'm really looking forward to sitting down with you and finding out more 181 00:09:16,449 --> 00:09:18,436 - about what you do here. - Any time. 182 00:09:18,596 --> 00:09:20,353 What do you do here? 183 00:09:23,740 --> 00:09:24,740 Excuse me. 184 00:09:25,269 --> 00:09:27,552 What is wrong with this woman? 185 00:09:27,672 --> 00:09:30,369 She's asking about stuff that's nobody's business. 186 00:09:30,489 --> 00:09:31,639 What do I do? 187 00:09:33,304 --> 00:09:36,336 Really, what do I do here? I should have written it down. 188 00:09:36,808 --> 00:09:38,116 "Qua" something. 189 00:09:39,302 --> 00:09:41,620 Qua... Quar... 190 00:09:41,740 --> 00:09:43,838 Quibo... Qual... 191 00:09:44,051 --> 00:09:45,498 Quir... Quabity. 192 00:09:45,618 --> 00:09:46,968 Quabity assuance. 193 00:09:47,741 --> 00:09:49,633 No. No, no, no, no. But I'm getting close. 194 00:09:49,989 --> 00:09:51,992 Have you been introduced to Kevin? 195 00:09:52,112 --> 00:09:53,637 No. Which one's Kevin? 196 00:09:59,258 --> 00:10:01,434 He's here on a special work program. 197 00:10:01,554 --> 00:10:03,563 He's slow, you know, in his brain. 198 00:10:03,683 --> 00:10:05,775 - Oh, good for you guys. - Yeah... 199 00:10:05,995 --> 00:10:08,309 Hazing is a fun way to show a new employee 200 00:10:08,429 --> 00:10:10,579 that she is not welcome or liked. 201 00:10:11,524 --> 00:10:14,434 Accounting department, listen up. Holly, human resources. 202 00:10:14,554 --> 00:10:17,866 - Angela, Oscar, and Kevin. - Hello. Hello. 203 00:10:18,803 --> 00:10:19,604 Hi. 204 00:10:19,865 --> 00:10:20,719 Hi. 205 00:10:21,159 --> 00:10:22,165 What do you do? 206 00:10:22,526 --> 00:10:23,876 I do the numbers. 207 00:10:24,212 --> 00:10:26,045 Oh, good for you. 208 00:10:28,343 --> 00:10:29,975 Do you want an M&M? 209 00:10:30,675 --> 00:10:32,884 Oh, no, that is so sweet. But thank you, though. 210 00:10:33,276 --> 00:10:35,903 Yeah, I keep them here at my desk 211 00:10:36,023 --> 00:10:37,931 so that everybody doesn't take them. 212 00:10:38,337 --> 00:10:41,028 Well, that is a very safe place for them. 213 00:10:42,879 --> 00:10:45,340 - Yeah. - Here she is. Holly. 214 00:10:46,426 --> 00:10:49,610 You know, if we hung Holly from the ceiling, 215 00:10:50,062 --> 00:10:52,184 we'd have to kiss underneath of her. 216 00:10:52,835 --> 00:10:53,952 So... I know. 217 00:10:54,524 --> 00:10:55,593 Sorry. Question. 218 00:10:55,713 --> 00:10:59,203 Are you real, or are you a Hollygram? 219 00:11:02,291 --> 00:11:04,225 Nice. I've never heard that one before, actually. 220 00:11:04,345 --> 00:11:05,793 - That's good. - I bet. 221 00:11:05,954 --> 00:11:08,546 Are these guys boring your ears off? 222 00:11:08,707 --> 00:11:09,836 No, no, I... 223 00:11:10,708 --> 00:11:12,133 What is your commute like? 224 00:11:12,293 --> 00:11:14,012 How long does it take to get in? 225 00:11:14,641 --> 00:11:16,261 You know, I should make you a mix. 226 00:11:18,531 --> 00:11:20,241 Do you have a CD player? 227 00:11:21,770 --> 00:11:22,722 Yeah. 228 00:11:22,887 --> 00:11:24,103 - All right. - Thanks. 229 00:11:24,263 --> 00:11:25,124 Great. 230 00:11:25,696 --> 00:11:26,841 Do you like it? 231 00:11:27,263 --> 00:11:30,275 It's a photo of everyone in the office. So you can take it to Costa Rica. 232 00:11:30,436 --> 00:11:33,320 - You're... You're not in it. - Well, I was taking the picture. 233 00:11:34,924 --> 00:11:36,741 I love it. I love it. 234 00:11:38,654 --> 00:11:42,010 I would love a picture of the two of us... 235 00:11:42,130 --> 00:11:43,872 to also take to Costa Rica. 236 00:11:44,341 --> 00:11:47,090 - Sure, do you have a camera here? - No... 237 00:11:48,872 --> 00:11:50,757 Does anyone have a camera here? 238 00:11:53,503 --> 00:11:55,175 No one has a camera here. 239 00:11:57,005 --> 00:11:58,659 I'm gonna... I'll go get one. 240 00:11:58,779 --> 00:11:59,779 Stay. 241 00:12:04,592 --> 00:12:08,131 So I just got the fax. Closing the sale, and... it's big. 242 00:12:08,611 --> 00:12:10,732 - It is really big. - Congratulations. 243 00:12:11,153 --> 00:12:13,902 Don't interrupt. Congratulations on doing your job. 244 00:12:14,167 --> 00:12:17,223 - You put the sale on the web site? - No, I didn't. I just logged it in. 245 00:12:17,343 --> 00:12:18,908 Try to be a team player here, Jim. 246 00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:20,706 Log it in the web site. 247 00:12:20,826 --> 00:12:23,371 - Well, it already went through, so... - Don't worry about that. 248 00:12:23,531 --> 00:12:24,733 Just re-log it. 249 00:12:25,691 --> 00:12:26,492 Hello? 250 00:12:28,859 --> 00:12:32,056 Hike up your skirt a little more 251 00:12:33,531 --> 00:12:34,337 Jim? 252 00:12:39,542 --> 00:12:44,134 - I am downloading some n3p music - That's not it. Yeah. 253 00:12:44,254 --> 00:12:48,038 - for a cd mix tape for Holly. - Close. 254 00:12:48,158 --> 00:12:51,523 And I'm looking for perfect songs that work on two levels. 255 00:12:51,906 --> 00:12:53,109 What are the two levels? 256 00:12:53,283 --> 00:12:55,772 The two levels being welcome to Scranton... 257 00:12:55,958 --> 00:12:58,072 and I... love you. 258 00:12:59,035 --> 00:13:02,007 Okay, let's start with the "I love you" level. 259 00:13:02,127 --> 00:13:03,745 Hey, what's the group 260 00:13:04,158 --> 00:13:06,079 that was from Scranton that made it big? 261 00:13:06,241 --> 00:13:07,725 - Was that U2? - Yes. 262 00:13:07,845 --> 00:13:09,395 You don't love Holly. 263 00:13:09,968 --> 00:13:11,876 - I think I do. - But you just met her. 264 00:13:12,038 --> 00:13:14,213 Well, it was love at first sight. 265 00:13:15,107 --> 00:13:18,164 Actually, it was... No. It was when I heard her voice. 266 00:13:18,284 --> 00:13:20,468 It was love at first see with my ears. 267 00:13:20,630 --> 00:13:22,291 Oh okay, it doesn't work like that. 268 00:13:22,465 --> 00:13:24,454 Well, you're not a romantic. 269 00:13:25,285 --> 00:13:27,182 Actually, I think I am, and... 270 00:13:27,596 --> 00:13:29,644 I've a little bit of experience in office romance. 271 00:13:29,909 --> 00:13:32,267 - Oh, really? Like, with who? - Yeah. 272 00:13:32,931 --> 00:13:34,900 - We've been through this. - Pam? 273 00:13:35,219 --> 00:13:38,027 Yes, we are still dating. And guess what. I took it slow. 274 00:13:38,470 --> 00:13:39,779 Yeah, you took it too slow. 275 00:13:39,972 --> 00:13:43,803 - Well, we're really happy. - This thing with Holly feels... 276 00:13:44,203 --> 00:13:45,703 a lot like love to me. 277 00:13:45,863 --> 00:13:48,293 And that's really sweet. And you can think that, 278 00:13:48,413 --> 00:13:51,125 but you don't say that out loud. And you definitely don't say it to her. 279 00:13:51,886 --> 00:13:53,334 I don't want her to get away. 280 00:13:53,533 --> 00:13:55,726 I know. Here, Michael, you can... 281 00:13:56,181 --> 00:13:58,605 court her as you get to know her, you know? 282 00:13:58,725 --> 00:14:00,975 I mean, the office is a great place for that. 283 00:14:01,476 --> 00:14:04,569 Pam and I, we got to know each other right out there. 284 00:14:04,876 --> 00:14:07,479 I mean, first time we joked around was at my desk. 285 00:14:07,599 --> 00:14:10,226 And the first meal we ever had was... 286 00:14:10,827 --> 00:14:12,603 in the break room, actually. 287 00:14:12,723 --> 00:14:15,970 We were at two separate tables and... I remember that. 288 00:14:16,349 --> 00:14:20,584 The first time we kissed even was right outside, and... 289 00:14:21,422 --> 00:14:22,229 Look. 290 00:14:22,680 --> 00:14:26,426 All I'm saying is that you can get to know someone really, really well, 291 00:14:27,072 --> 00:14:28,166 like I did... 292 00:14:28,545 --> 00:14:29,876 Right here at work. 293 00:14:32,602 --> 00:14:34,010 I was thinking... 294 00:14:34,618 --> 00:14:36,837 fireworks for the party. What do you think? 295 00:14:36,997 --> 00:14:39,507 Oh, boy, I appreciate your help, but I can't... 296 00:14:39,667 --> 00:14:43,510 Oh, no. I just meant I wanted to pay to have fireworks at the party. 297 00:14:43,671 --> 00:14:45,011 Why would you do that? 298 00:14:46,122 --> 00:14:47,806 Because I'm gonna miss Toby. 299 00:14:49,415 --> 00:14:50,865 Yep, he's... 300 00:14:51,259 --> 00:14:54,021 a heck of a guy, and I think we should send him off right. It doesn't matter. 301 00:14:54,141 --> 00:14:55,256 Here you go. 302 00:14:58,525 --> 00:14:59,526 Really? 303 00:15:00,063 --> 00:15:01,694 Well, we all want a good party, right? 304 00:15:03,888 --> 00:15:05,784 I'm going to propose tonight. 305 00:15:07,148 --> 00:15:09,036 Holy crap! 306 00:15:21,413 --> 00:15:23,264 - Hey, Kevin. - Hi. 307 00:15:23,936 --> 00:15:25,486 Do you need some help? 308 00:15:25,935 --> 00:15:27,934 I can't decide what to get. 309 00:15:28,685 --> 00:15:30,513 Well, what do you like to eat? 310 00:15:31,372 --> 00:15:33,845 Well, I like pretzels, but... 311 00:15:35,132 --> 00:15:37,120 I really like chips. 312 00:15:39,062 --> 00:15:41,263 Well, how much money do you have there? 313 00:15:42,987 --> 00:15:44,375 Okay, let's see. 314 00:15:45,218 --> 00:15:46,419 50... 315 00:15:47,549 --> 00:15:48,822 This is a button. 316 00:15:51,540 --> 00:15:54,702 55, 65... Okay, you have 75 cents. 317 00:15:54,822 --> 00:15:57,418 So that means you could get 318 00:15:57,776 --> 00:16:00,028 anything up on the top row. 319 00:16:07,783 --> 00:16:09,950 I am totally gonna bang Holly! 320 00:16:10,251 --> 00:16:12,274 She is cute and helpful, 321 00:16:12,501 --> 00:16:14,451 and she really seems into me. 322 00:16:15,156 --> 00:16:16,755 Hey, Ryan, it's Jim. 323 00:16:16,875 --> 00:16:18,637 I don't know what you got lately, 324 00:16:18,757 --> 00:16:21,695 but you know what, I really don't care because you're trying to get rid of me. 325 00:16:21,815 --> 00:16:25,134 And I bet you think I don't care enough about this job to actually fight back, 326 00:16:25,254 --> 00:16:27,495 but you're wrong, because I do, and I will. 327 00:16:27,615 --> 00:16:29,634 So you can keep trying to push me out of this place, 328 00:16:29,754 --> 00:16:32,239 but guess what... I'm not going anywhere. 329 00:16:45,670 --> 00:16:46,814 Damn it! 330 00:16:48,280 --> 00:16:49,975 Hello, Holly. 331 00:16:52,076 --> 00:16:53,893 What are you doing? You don't... 332 00:16:54,687 --> 00:16:57,632 You don't have to do that. I mean, we have already put-together chairs. 333 00:16:57,752 --> 00:16:59,444 That's how we buy them, actually. 334 00:17:00,364 --> 00:17:03,734 I'm trying to adjust the lumbar support on Toby's chair, 335 00:17:04,532 --> 00:17:06,611 and that made this up/down lever thing not work. 336 00:17:06,965 --> 00:17:10,276 And then I took the whole chair apart, and... 337 00:17:11,099 --> 00:17:13,384 that is the story of me on the floor. 338 00:17:13,504 --> 00:17:15,703 It's pretty good, right? I'm gonna sell the movie rights. 339 00:17:15,880 --> 00:17:17,130 And the sequel, 340 00:17:17,342 --> 00:17:18,998 woman stands at desk and works. 341 00:17:22,555 --> 00:17:23,564 So, 342 00:17:24,179 --> 00:17:25,845 I have no idea how you... 343 00:17:26,316 --> 00:17:27,632 How you sit like that. 344 00:17:28,103 --> 00:17:29,047 Yoga. 345 00:17:30,213 --> 00:17:33,069 Sit on floor and put together chair we will. 346 00:17:40,194 --> 00:17:41,194 Yo-da. 347 00:17:46,313 --> 00:17:49,302 Pass curvy metal piece you will. 348 00:17:56,692 --> 00:17:58,602 So are you in town this weekend? 349 00:17:59,478 --> 00:18:01,245 'Cause I'm not... I'm not... 350 00:18:01,945 --> 00:18:03,540 I'm not gonna be in town. 351 00:18:05,071 --> 00:18:06,546 I'm going out of town. 352 00:18:06,794 --> 00:18:08,297 So you can't make my orgy? 353 00:18:10,069 --> 00:18:11,069 Kidding. 354 00:18:12,660 --> 00:18:13,762 Kidding. 355 00:18:14,391 --> 00:18:15,445 Acting! 356 00:18:15,675 --> 00:18:18,346 - Acting! - Acting! 357 00:18:19,783 --> 00:18:20,784 Lovitz. 358 00:18:22,069 --> 00:18:23,069 Yeah. 359 00:18:24,759 --> 00:18:25,759 I did it. 360 00:18:27,191 --> 00:18:29,531 - What'd you do? - I talked to her... Holly. 361 00:18:30,108 --> 00:18:33,951 Just pleasantries. Nothing, you know, not like, do you want kids? 362 00:18:34,071 --> 00:18:37,003 Or religion or what side of the bed do you want? 363 00:18:37,570 --> 00:18:40,388 Hey, I can take either side of the bed at this point. 364 00:18:40,907 --> 00:18:43,666 - Okay, so how'd that feel? - It was hard. I wanted to kiss her. 365 00:18:44,004 --> 00:18:45,727 Oh, I'm so glad you didn't. 366 00:18:45,847 --> 00:18:46,850 Oh, god. 367 00:18:48,262 --> 00:18:49,412 Laying a base. 368 00:18:49,532 --> 00:18:51,257 - Laying a base. - There you go. 369 00:18:51,377 --> 00:18:53,774 There's plenty of base laying left, right? 370 00:18:56,319 --> 00:18:57,120 Yeah. 371 00:18:58,759 --> 00:18:59,909 Hello, Angela. 372 00:19:00,321 --> 00:19:02,685 Phyllis, you look like you're gonna have a heart attack. 373 00:19:03,506 --> 00:19:05,605 Could I get a list of your vendors? 374 00:19:06,788 --> 00:19:08,817 - I shredded it. - Why would you do that? 375 00:19:09,149 --> 00:19:11,861 Gosh, I just don't know. Why do you think? 376 00:19:17,563 --> 00:19:18,493 Sorry. 377 00:19:22,776 --> 00:19:24,204 What'd you guys do? 378 00:19:24,410 --> 00:19:25,767 Oh, there he is. 379 00:19:25,887 --> 00:19:27,890 Thought you had gone home already. 380 00:19:28,010 --> 00:19:30,213 Why don't you go home and come back for the party? 381 00:19:32,451 --> 00:19:35,677 Well, we still have to do the exit interview. 382 00:19:39,326 --> 00:19:40,326 Yes, we do. 383 00:19:41,447 --> 00:19:45,016 I'll let you in on a little secret. I've been looking forward to this moment. 384 00:19:45,136 --> 00:19:46,386 Very, very much. 385 00:19:46,513 --> 00:19:49,731 I... I have been steeped in anticipation. 386 00:19:50,395 --> 00:19:51,610 Toby has been 387 00:19:52,364 --> 00:19:55,322 cruisin' for a bruisin' for 12 years, 388 00:19:55,512 --> 00:19:58,283 and I am now his cruise director. 389 00:19:58,702 --> 00:20:00,852 And my name is captain Bruisin'. 390 00:20:02,219 --> 00:20:04,456 - Thanks, Michael. I didn't expect... - Can I just say that 391 00:20:05,645 --> 00:20:08,168 of all the idiots in all the idiot villages 392 00:20:08,520 --> 00:20:10,379 in all the idiot worlds, 393 00:20:10,540 --> 00:20:13,519 you stand alone, my friend. 394 00:20:13,639 --> 00:20:15,175 - Hello. - Hey! 395 00:20:15,576 --> 00:20:17,580 - Hi, good to see you. - You too. 396 00:20:17,921 --> 00:20:20,145 I'm just having a little exit interview. 397 00:20:20,265 --> 00:20:22,098 Yeah, I know. That's why I'm here. 398 00:20:22,264 --> 00:20:24,934 No, no. This is very boring stuff. Why don't you take a tour? 399 00:20:25,095 --> 00:20:26,511 Have you seen the bailer? 400 00:20:26,631 --> 00:20:28,834 No, no, I'll look at it later. 401 00:20:29,942 --> 00:20:31,464 It's part of my job. 402 00:20:34,453 --> 00:20:35,453 Okay. 403 00:20:36,765 --> 00:20:39,199 - Did you need me to take notes? - Hi, Pam. Stay. 404 00:20:39,360 --> 00:20:40,265 Okay. 405 00:20:44,827 --> 00:20:46,439 All right. Well then, 406 00:20:47,528 --> 00:20:49,938 I will proceed. I just have some... 407 00:20:50,982 --> 00:20:52,379 questions that I was gonna ask. 408 00:21:01,515 --> 00:21:03,265 Who do you think you are? 409 00:21:08,479 --> 00:21:09,479 I'm Toby. 410 00:21:10,024 --> 00:21:10,824 Yeah. 411 00:21:11,690 --> 00:21:12,705 Correct. 412 00:21:16,803 --> 00:21:18,247 What gives... What... 413 00:21:19,391 --> 00:21:21,141 What gives you the right? 414 00:21:24,121 --> 00:21:26,797 I brought the binder. Do you wanna take a little look? 415 00:21:26,917 --> 00:21:29,957 Sure, you know what, that sounds good. I'll take a little looksie. 416 00:21:30,777 --> 00:21:32,545 - Here we go. - Thank you. 417 00:21:34,288 --> 00:21:37,520 "What would you improve... 418 00:21:38,278 --> 00:21:40,427 "about Dunder Mifflin?" 419 00:21:40,710 --> 00:21:41,712 This place... 420 00:21:41,832 --> 00:21:43,944 - No, no, no, no, no, no, no. - I've got some ideas. 421 00:21:44,064 --> 00:21:46,338 I'm not asking it, I'm just reading it out loud. 422 00:21:46,458 --> 00:21:48,059 Oh, I'd like to hear the answer. 423 00:21:50,291 --> 00:21:51,535 Well, let me see. 424 00:21:51,655 --> 00:21:53,046 I would... 425 00:22:03,960 --> 00:22:05,035 I'll kill you. 426 00:22:07,262 --> 00:22:09,065 I guess everything's okay. 427 00:22:09,680 --> 00:22:11,708 I made it this far, right? 428 00:22:12,394 --> 00:22:13,744 What's the point? 429 00:22:14,485 --> 00:22:15,962 Why don't you open your present? 430 00:22:19,459 --> 00:22:21,509 This might not be what I think... 431 00:22:21,937 --> 00:22:25,090 that I don't even know's in there 'cause there are a lot of presents in my car, 432 00:22:25,210 --> 00:22:26,917 and I don't know which is which. 433 00:22:27,634 --> 00:22:29,020 "Suck on this." 434 00:22:32,770 --> 00:22:34,891 - What the hell is that? - Michael... 435 00:22:35,011 --> 00:22:36,315 What do you mean "Michael"?! 436 00:22:37,536 --> 00:22:39,394 That's not even my handwriting. 437 00:22:39,514 --> 00:22:40,317 Hey! 438 00:22:40,770 --> 00:22:43,234 What the hell is going on here?! 439 00:22:44,186 --> 00:22:47,493 Who thought it would be hysterical to give Toby a rock 440 00:22:47,654 --> 00:22:49,214 for his going-away gift?! 441 00:22:49,334 --> 00:22:51,466 - You did. You made me wrap it. - No! 442 00:22:51,586 --> 00:22:53,656 I thought it was over the line. I just... 443 00:22:53,870 --> 00:22:56,545 You know what that is? You know what that is? That is... 444 00:22:59,469 --> 00:23:00,648 a psyche. 445 00:23:02,301 --> 00:23:03,135 Psyche. 446 00:23:03,582 --> 00:23:05,842 So, that is not my real gift to Toby. 447 00:23:06,047 --> 00:23:08,950 - So what is your gift? - My gift is forthcoming, Pam. 448 00:23:09,329 --> 00:23:10,466 What is it? 449 00:23:12,111 --> 00:23:15,331 I am going to give Toby... 450 00:23:15,899 --> 00:23:17,105 Your watch? 451 00:23:19,837 --> 00:23:21,111 Yes, I am. 452 00:23:22,676 --> 00:23:23,888 That was it. 453 00:23:24,342 --> 00:23:25,717 How did you know that? 454 00:23:25,837 --> 00:23:27,529 - I just knew. - How did you know? 455 00:23:27,649 --> 00:23:29,340 Oh, that is so sweet. 456 00:23:29,460 --> 00:23:32,039 Well... That's my watch. 457 00:23:32,213 --> 00:23:34,403 Thanks. I'm gonna set it to Costa Rica time. 458 00:23:34,523 --> 00:23:35,624 Hey, that's good. 459 00:23:35,785 --> 00:23:37,715 Hey, it's the kid. Look, look, look. 460 00:23:40,402 --> 00:23:41,672 It's the temp. Look. 461 00:23:41,834 --> 00:23:43,641 - Oh, my gosh. - It's the temp. 462 00:23:44,304 --> 00:23:46,550 - Is that the police? - Yes. 463 00:23:46,670 --> 00:23:47,846 This is what happened. 464 00:23:48,007 --> 00:23:50,819 Ryan's big project was the web site, 465 00:23:51,674 --> 00:23:53,185 which wasn't doing so well. 466 00:23:53,345 --> 00:23:56,319 So Ryan, to give the impression of sales, 467 00:23:56,589 --> 00:23:57,905 recorded them twice. 468 00:23:58,025 --> 00:24:00,563 Once as office sales, and once as web site sales. 469 00:24:00,683 --> 00:24:04,196 Which's what we refer to in the business as misleading the shareholders. 470 00:24:04,357 --> 00:24:06,969 Another good term is fraud. 471 00:24:08,527 --> 00:24:10,084 The real crime, I think, 472 00:24:10,656 --> 00:24:11,661 was the beard. 473 00:24:11,987 --> 00:24:14,247 Oh, my god. Ryan. 474 00:24:14,804 --> 00:24:15,873 Oh, my god. 475 00:24:16,150 --> 00:24:18,695 I cannot wait to visit Ryan in prison. 476 00:24:19,336 --> 00:24:21,592 I'm gonna wear my hottest track suit and get my hair done. 477 00:24:21,712 --> 00:24:23,532 And then be, like, "Hi, Ryan." 478 00:24:23,652 --> 00:24:26,528 And then all the other prisoners are gonna be like, "Damn! 479 00:24:26,648 --> 00:24:28,659 "Ryan, you got a hot ex-girlfriend. 480 00:24:28,779 --> 00:24:32,701 "I would never have treated her so bad when I was outside of prison." 481 00:24:33,343 --> 00:24:35,459 Would you do me a favor and connect me to Ryan? 482 00:24:35,720 --> 00:24:36,725 Absolutely. 483 00:24:43,340 --> 00:24:44,790 Right to voice mail. 484 00:24:45,181 --> 00:24:47,133 Hey, Ryan, it's Jim. 485 00:24:47,253 --> 00:24:49,845 You know what? Totally disregard that last voice mail 486 00:24:49,965 --> 00:24:52,034 because you obviously have your hands tied. 487 00:24:53,154 --> 00:24:54,163 Good luck. 488 00:24:55,720 --> 00:24:56,997 What's protocol on this? 489 00:24:57,401 --> 00:25:00,251 Well, I normally do nothing, I guess. 490 00:25:02,487 --> 00:25:03,505 You shouldn't... 491 00:25:06,106 --> 00:25:07,722 Michael, are you okay? 492 00:25:08,438 --> 00:25:09,885 I'm just worried about my friend. 493 00:25:10,769 --> 00:25:12,058 Of course you are. 494 00:25:12,178 --> 00:25:13,431 Just... I'm fine. 495 00:25:14,590 --> 00:25:16,976 I'm holding it together. I have a business to run. I'm cool. 496 00:25:17,153 --> 00:25:18,284 No, hey, stop. 497 00:25:18,404 --> 00:25:20,729 You can let yourself be upset. He's your friend. 498 00:25:26,277 --> 00:25:28,223 You know what I usually find? 499 00:25:28,343 --> 00:25:30,940 Holly is sweet and simple. 500 00:25:31,403 --> 00:25:32,753 Like a lady baker. 501 00:25:33,378 --> 00:25:36,233 I... would not be surprised 502 00:25:36,353 --> 00:25:40,268 to find out that she had worked in a bakery before coming here. 503 00:25:40,388 --> 00:25:42,117 She has that kind of warmth. 504 00:25:44,963 --> 00:25:47,590 I'm pretty sure she's baked on a professional level. 505 00:25:51,949 --> 00:25:53,555 Cool! 506 00:25:53,930 --> 00:25:55,224 A bouncy house! 507 00:25:55,344 --> 00:25:57,016 Kevin, take your shoes off first. 508 00:26:01,496 --> 00:26:03,224 No anti-gravity machine, huh? 509 00:26:03,344 --> 00:26:05,524 Sorry, Michael. I don't think they're real. 510 00:26:05,766 --> 00:26:07,589 The ferris wheel is pretty cool, though. 511 00:26:08,655 --> 00:26:10,305 Look at our parking lot. 512 00:26:10,528 --> 00:26:12,302 Yeah, who'd have thought? 513 00:26:21,039 --> 00:26:23,083 Is Jim gonna propose tonight? 514 00:26:23,656 --> 00:26:24,906 He is, isn't he? 515 00:26:25,471 --> 00:26:26,621 No, he's not. 516 00:26:27,909 --> 00:26:28,839 Is he? 517 00:26:29,000 --> 00:26:32,101 Oh, it was a pretty good company, but I just couldn't see a future there. 518 00:26:32,221 --> 00:26:34,562 They kept hiring from the outside. 519 00:26:34,682 --> 00:26:37,727 It was easy to get in, but impossible to rise up. 520 00:26:37,847 --> 00:26:39,163 That's what she... 521 00:26:39,283 --> 00:26:41,115 A lot of places are like that. 522 00:26:42,117 --> 00:26:44,021 I think it's really cool you hired Kevin. 523 00:26:44,662 --> 00:26:45,642 Thanks. 524 00:26:47,685 --> 00:26:49,347 - You have it? - Almost. 525 00:26:53,345 --> 00:26:55,699 Here we go, here we go. Put it in. 526 00:26:57,979 --> 00:26:59,453 That... that's my car. 527 00:27:02,346 --> 00:27:03,733 What are you doing? 528 00:27:05,879 --> 00:27:08,330 - What the hell's going on here?! - Nothing you need to know. 529 00:27:08,450 --> 00:27:10,923 - There is a raccoon in the car, Dwight! - No, there's not. 530 00:27:11,136 --> 00:27:13,442 - Why did you do that? - It was playful hazing. 531 00:27:13,711 --> 00:27:16,136 No, there's no such thing as playful hazing. 532 00:27:17,209 --> 00:27:18,954 Dwight, I want you to look at Holly now. 533 00:27:19,074 --> 00:27:21,831 Everybody, I want you to look at Holly right now. 534 00:27:21,951 --> 00:27:25,729 And maybe if you look at her deeply enough, you'll see what I see in her. 535 00:27:26,572 --> 00:27:28,983 And that is that we are all very lucky 536 00:27:29,325 --> 00:27:31,221 to have her here. 537 00:27:31,639 --> 00:27:34,124 Holly is the best thing... 538 00:27:35,075 --> 00:27:37,225 that has happened to this company 539 00:27:37,825 --> 00:27:39,330 since World War II. 540 00:27:39,637 --> 00:27:41,768 50 years... She is the best. 541 00:27:43,535 --> 00:27:46,140 - Take care of that, all right? - It's not rabid. 542 00:27:47,727 --> 00:27:50,130 - Thanks for bringing that up. - Get it out, come on, get it out. 543 00:27:50,388 --> 00:27:51,521 I'm really sorry. 544 00:27:51,641 --> 00:27:55,135 Michael, thank you so much for saying that. 545 00:27:55,512 --> 00:27:57,679 I feel so welcome here. I just... 546 00:28:03,351 --> 00:28:04,409 Excuse me. 547 00:28:08,056 --> 00:28:10,631 Did you see that? Did you see it? Did you see what... 548 00:28:13,960 --> 00:28:17,107 Well, Jan didn't believe in showing affection, so... 549 00:28:18,140 --> 00:28:21,051 sometimes I don't know how to react to when a girl touches me. 550 00:28:22,516 --> 00:28:23,575 I like it. 551 00:28:26,830 --> 00:28:28,167 Mrs. Vance, we're all out. 552 00:28:29,593 --> 00:28:33,422 Kev, I need you to do me a solid and go buy some more barbecue sauce. 553 00:28:35,300 --> 00:28:36,301 Okay. 554 00:28:39,769 --> 00:28:40,769 Cool. 555 00:28:41,634 --> 00:28:43,098 You drive your own car? 556 00:28:43,645 --> 00:28:45,779 Yup, this is my car. 557 00:28:46,337 --> 00:28:47,686 Do you drive your own car? 558 00:28:48,148 --> 00:28:50,190 Yep, just like you. 559 00:28:51,553 --> 00:28:52,812 Okay, bye. 560 00:28:53,209 --> 00:28:54,209 Bye. 561 00:28:57,718 --> 00:28:59,157 I'm really proud of you. 562 00:29:05,710 --> 00:29:07,957 All right. Let's hear it for Darryl and his band. 563 00:29:09,209 --> 00:29:11,901 You know what? Let's also give a shout out to Phyllis 564 00:29:12,021 --> 00:29:13,796 for this awesome party, huh? 565 00:29:14,472 --> 00:29:17,543 Probably the best one that we have ever had, right? 566 00:29:18,219 --> 00:29:20,652 But the real reason that we are here 567 00:29:20,772 --> 00:29:24,251 is to say good-bye to a guy who we will probably 568 00:29:24,371 --> 00:29:25,975 never ever see again. 569 00:29:26,095 --> 00:29:29,144 Now, a lot of you know that I am an accomplished songwriter. 570 00:29:29,460 --> 00:29:30,529 Song parody writer. 571 00:29:30,649 --> 00:29:33,482 I have done things like... Beers in heaven. 572 00:29:33,602 --> 00:29:35,693 - Classic. - Or Total eclipse of the fart. 573 00:29:36,211 --> 00:29:38,405 - Not my favorite, but... - I love to sing them, 574 00:29:38,565 --> 00:29:41,574 but I am not going to be doing that today. 575 00:29:41,899 --> 00:29:45,208 I am going to be doing something I wrote specifically for Toby. 576 00:29:45,839 --> 00:29:47,286 Do you know... 577 00:29:48,173 --> 00:29:50,417 - Goodbye stranger, Supertramp? - Yeah. 578 00:29:52,538 --> 00:29:54,566 It was early morning yesterday 579 00:29:56,068 --> 00:29:58,075 I was up before the dawn 580 00:30:00,713 --> 00:30:03,409 and I really have enjoyed my stay 581 00:30:04,274 --> 00:30:05,890 but Toby must be moving on 582 00:30:08,830 --> 00:30:10,351 I'm gonna miss Toby. 583 00:30:10,471 --> 00:30:13,940 He has a nice, calming presence in the office. 584 00:30:14,400 --> 00:30:16,013 Goodbye, Toby 585 00:30:16,133 --> 00:30:17,916 it's been nice 586 00:30:18,036 --> 00:30:21,281 hope you find your paradise 587 00:30:21,544 --> 00:30:24,575 Don't tell him I said this, but I always thought he was kinda cute. 588 00:30:24,776 --> 00:30:28,776 Come tomorrow feel no pain 589 00:30:29,965 --> 00:30:32,880 Feel no pain 590 00:30:40,712 --> 00:30:42,129 Toby's goin' away! 591 00:30:42,403 --> 00:30:43,403 See ya! 592 00:30:43,595 --> 00:30:45,203 See ya, Toby, see ya! 593 00:30:45,323 --> 00:30:46,362 He's outta here. 594 00:30:48,312 --> 00:30:49,972 Goodbye, Toby 595 00:30:56,225 --> 00:30:57,817 - Not bad. - Oh, hey. 596 00:30:58,642 --> 00:30:59,443 Thanks. 597 00:30:59,605 --> 00:31:01,600 Someday I would love to hear Beers in heaven. 598 00:31:01,720 --> 00:31:02,973 Oh, okay. Yeah. 599 00:31:03,093 --> 00:31:06,165 Well, actually, too soon. It's... 600 00:31:06,573 --> 00:31:07,827 It's very sexual. 601 00:31:10,030 --> 00:31:11,030 Sorry. 602 00:31:12,326 --> 00:31:13,184 Kevin. 603 00:31:14,468 --> 00:31:17,221 Kevin, where are you? You missed my song, buddy. 604 00:31:17,341 --> 00:31:20,408 Yeah, Michael, I'm at Gerrity's. You have to come down here. 605 00:31:20,528 --> 00:31:22,722 Just pay for it and we'll reimburse you when you get back. 606 00:31:22,842 --> 00:31:24,092 No, I brought my money. 607 00:31:24,635 --> 00:31:26,386 There's something that you need to see. 608 00:31:26,691 --> 00:31:28,530 - What is it? - Just hurry. 609 00:31:30,009 --> 00:31:32,768 - Is he okay? - Yeah, he needs me at the supermarket. 610 00:31:33,266 --> 00:31:36,481 The party, driving to the supermarket... It was a big day for him. 611 00:31:37,133 --> 00:31:40,317 Yeah, that's true. Don't move a muscle. 612 00:31:40,715 --> 00:31:43,153 I will be back momentarily, all right? 613 00:31:43,961 --> 00:31:46,324 No, you can... Finish your drink and then I'll... 614 00:31:46,484 --> 00:31:47,642 I'll be back. 615 00:31:55,523 --> 00:31:58,818 - It was good to see you. - It was great to see you, Jan. 616 00:31:58,992 --> 00:32:00,493 Okay. 617 00:32:01,553 --> 00:32:03,874 - Hello, Jan. - Hello... Michael. 618 00:32:04,502 --> 00:32:06,596 Kevin, really? We're... 619 00:32:07,226 --> 00:32:09,809 Sorry, we're in the middle of a party. Is this why you called me? 620 00:32:09,929 --> 00:32:12,071 Yeah, Michael, I just... 621 00:32:13,122 --> 00:32:15,250 I think you kids have a lot to catch up on. 622 00:32:15,370 --> 00:32:16,812 - Oh, okay. - Yeah. 623 00:32:16,932 --> 00:32:18,082 Thanks, Kevin. 624 00:32:24,422 --> 00:32:26,732 I can't believe it! 625 00:32:27,304 --> 00:32:28,720 Look at you! 626 00:32:29,318 --> 00:32:30,565 - Are you nauseous? - No. 627 00:32:30,685 --> 00:32:32,412 Do you... Do you have cravings? 628 00:32:32,572 --> 00:32:34,455 You never touched my Propecia or my Accutane? 629 00:32:34,615 --> 00:32:38,125 - No, I didn't... touch that. - Good. Thank god. 'Cause that's... 630 00:32:38,404 --> 00:32:39,909 Wow, I'm so happy. 631 00:32:40,029 --> 00:32:41,589 I am so deliriously happy. 632 00:32:41,709 --> 00:32:43,350 - Why? - Because you're pregnant. 633 00:32:43,470 --> 00:32:46,824 And because it obviously happened when we were together, and... 634 00:32:46,944 --> 00:32:49,304 - I am very proud... - Yeah, it did happen 635 00:32:49,464 --> 00:32:51,786 when we were together. That's true. 636 00:32:51,906 --> 00:32:53,683 But you... 637 00:32:55,468 --> 00:32:56,468 are not... 638 00:32:58,157 --> 00:32:59,617 You're not the dad. 639 00:33:09,216 --> 00:33:10,740 You cheated on me? 640 00:33:11,595 --> 00:33:15,783 - When I specifically asked you not to? - No, I did not... 641 00:33:16,345 --> 00:33:18,374 I did not cheat on you. 642 00:33:19,097 --> 00:33:20,097 I did not. 643 00:33:21,360 --> 00:33:22,484 Well... okay. 644 00:33:22,838 --> 00:33:27,008 Okay. So it's not mine, and it's not somebody else's, so... 645 00:33:28,223 --> 00:33:29,223 I know... 646 00:33:30,786 --> 00:33:32,888 the whole toilet seat thing is a myth, so... 647 00:33:33,049 --> 00:33:35,535 I went to... a sperm bank. 648 00:33:36,858 --> 00:33:37,838 You did? 649 00:33:38,888 --> 00:33:41,312 - When we were going out? - Yeah. 650 00:33:42,224 --> 00:33:43,674 I don't understand. 651 00:33:44,098 --> 00:33:46,290 You always used to be very cautious. 652 00:33:47,100 --> 00:33:49,572 - I'd wear two condoms. - I know. 653 00:33:49,878 --> 00:33:51,907 You'd rather have somebody else's sperm than mine? 654 00:33:52,068 --> 00:33:53,159 No, no, no. 655 00:33:53,347 --> 00:33:56,603 It's not just any sperm bank. I mean, it's really... 656 00:33:56,723 --> 00:34:00,602 This is a really, really great place. It's amazing, actually. 657 00:34:00,722 --> 00:34:03,727 I'm gonna bring you the catalogue. You should look through it. It's... 658 00:34:03,847 --> 00:34:07,798 And it's a fact, it's right next to that little breakfast place that you like 659 00:34:07,959 --> 00:34:09,852 in the city where you can draw on the tables. 660 00:34:09,972 --> 00:34:10,842 Ihop. 661 00:34:11,473 --> 00:34:12,386 Ihop. 662 00:34:12,785 --> 00:34:15,231 If I was 22 and I had lots of time 663 00:34:15,474 --> 00:34:19,051 to have lots of children, then sure, let's let Michael have a shot at one. 664 00:34:19,171 --> 00:34:21,228 But honestly, I need to make this one count. 665 00:34:22,022 --> 00:34:24,400 That's really good. I feel so much better. 666 00:34:24,520 --> 00:34:26,608 I just needed to get all of that out onto the table. 667 00:34:27,034 --> 00:34:28,229 I'm glad you told me. 668 00:34:28,349 --> 00:34:30,381 I don't know what you're gonna be doing tomorrow, 669 00:34:30,501 --> 00:34:32,781 but I have my lamaze class in Allentown. 670 00:34:32,974 --> 00:34:33,998 And... 671 00:34:34,477 --> 00:34:35,535 you could come. 672 00:34:36,223 --> 00:34:40,455 I usually, you know, use a foam noodle instead of a partner. 673 00:34:45,426 --> 00:34:46,670 I've to think about it. 674 00:34:48,414 --> 00:34:49,414 Okay. 675 00:34:51,664 --> 00:34:53,550 My whole life, I... 676 00:34:54,723 --> 00:34:56,107 have known two things. 677 00:34:56,227 --> 00:34:59,171 I love sex, and I want to have kids. 678 00:35:00,038 --> 00:35:03,427 And I always thought that those two things would go hand in hand. 679 00:35:04,163 --> 00:35:06,913 But now, I think it might be one or the other. 680 00:35:08,289 --> 00:35:09,813 Oh, look they're starting. 681 00:35:27,748 --> 00:35:29,713 Well, I hope you had fun today. 682 00:35:29,977 --> 00:35:32,132 'Cause you're never ever throwing a party again. 683 00:35:57,591 --> 00:35:59,075 Can I have your attention, please? 684 00:36:00,730 --> 00:36:03,480 I was waiting for the right time to do this, 685 00:36:03,604 --> 00:36:06,416 and I can't think of a better time than right now, 686 00:36:06,855 --> 00:36:10,129 with the music playing, and all our friends around, 687 00:36:10,289 --> 00:36:12,590 and the fireworks going off. 688 00:36:13,289 --> 00:36:14,794 My parents are here... 689 00:36:14,914 --> 00:36:16,612 Andrew and Ellen Bernard. 690 00:36:16,732 --> 00:36:19,221 Thank you for sharing in this joyous moment. 691 00:36:20,165 --> 00:36:23,225 Miss Angela Martin, will you please join me onstage? 692 00:36:25,541 --> 00:36:28,318 Okay, then I will come to you, my flower. 693 00:36:30,170 --> 00:36:31,171 Damn it! 694 00:36:34,667 --> 00:36:35,667 Angela... 695 00:36:37,354 --> 00:36:39,714 Will you do me the honor... 696 00:36:40,917 --> 00:36:44,057 Of giving me your tiny hand... 697 00:36:45,008 --> 00:36:46,167 in marriage? 698 00:36:54,794 --> 00:36:55,794 Okay. 699 00:36:56,762 --> 00:36:57,926 Into the mike, sweetie. 700 00:36:58,420 --> 00:36:59,809 I said okay. 701 00:37:00,131 --> 00:37:01,618 She said yes! 702 00:37:03,234 --> 00:37:05,959 And the crowd goes wild! 703 00:37:16,144 --> 00:37:19,885 I've been carrying that ring around in my wallet for six years. 704 00:37:20,358 --> 00:37:22,864 Because you don't know when you're gonna meet the right girl 705 00:37:22,984 --> 00:37:24,922 and the moment's gonna be right. 706 00:37:25,108 --> 00:37:26,481 And tonight, 707 00:37:26,788 --> 00:37:29,663 with the fireworks and the music 708 00:37:30,021 --> 00:37:32,753 and everything... it was right. 709 00:37:33,332 --> 00:37:34,928 Can I be your bridesmaid? 710 00:37:35,048 --> 00:37:36,048 No. 711 00:37:42,921 --> 00:37:43,921 Well... 712 00:37:46,048 --> 00:37:47,398 It's my own fault. 713 00:37:50,236 --> 00:37:51,236 Tuna! 714 00:37:53,355 --> 00:37:54,471 I'm engaged! 715 00:37:54,591 --> 00:37:56,735 I know. That's awesome, man. That's great. 716 00:37:56,986 --> 00:37:59,711 Mr. Andrew Bernard. 717 00:38:01,548 --> 00:38:03,398 It's got a nice ring to it. 718 00:38:04,361 --> 00:38:05,361 Hey. 719 00:38:06,110 --> 00:38:09,624 Hey, you know, I just realized... I don't have a picture of the two of us. 720 00:38:10,549 --> 00:38:11,554 Oh, yeah... 721 00:38:11,674 --> 00:38:12,918 - Yeah. Could we? - Sure. 722 00:38:13,737 --> 00:38:15,003 Meredith, do you mind? 723 00:38:16,230 --> 00:38:17,756 - This one right here. - Okay. 724 00:38:19,627 --> 00:38:21,243 One, two, three. 725 00:38:23,520 --> 00:38:26,140 Oh, let's do it again. Pam, your smile is weird. 726 00:38:26,301 --> 00:38:28,899 It's digital, so just take as many as you want. 727 00:38:30,823 --> 00:38:32,282 One, two, three. 728 00:38:33,863 --> 00:38:35,358 One, two, three. 729 00:38:35,739 --> 00:38:36,995 I don't know, I just... 730 00:38:37,115 --> 00:38:39,965 I really thought Jim was gonna propose tonight. 731 00:38:43,740 --> 00:38:45,660 - Hey there. - Hey. 732 00:38:45,821 --> 00:38:47,867 - So, you missed something really big. - Yeah? 733 00:38:47,987 --> 00:38:50,181 Andy proposed to one of your accountants. 734 00:38:51,535 --> 00:38:53,660 I'm not so specific as I can be on my first day, but... 735 00:38:53,780 --> 00:38:56,056 Well, I can see Andy proposing to Angela. 736 00:38:56,176 --> 00:38:57,837 I can also see him proposing to Oscar. 737 00:39:00,124 --> 00:39:00,925 So... 738 00:39:01,699 --> 00:39:05,576 You know, somehow, after all those ribs, I'm still really hungry. 739 00:39:06,425 --> 00:39:09,182 I don't know, I was thinking of maybe going off-campus somewhere 740 00:39:09,302 --> 00:39:10,558 and getting some dessert. 741 00:39:12,501 --> 00:39:15,679 Well, you know what? You should go to the Glider Diner. 742 00:39:16,387 --> 00:39:19,269 Ask Stanley about that. He practically lives there. 743 00:39:19,784 --> 00:39:20,694 Okay. 744 00:39:20,856 --> 00:39:22,612 I'll go to the diner with you. 745 00:39:23,396 --> 00:39:24,739 That would be great. 746 00:39:25,618 --> 00:39:26,992 Yeah, we can go eat pie. 747 00:39:27,556 --> 00:39:28,556 I love pie. 748 00:39:29,366 --> 00:39:30,658 - Me too. - Okay. 749 00:39:31,938 --> 00:39:33,991 - Have a good night. - Okay. Good night. 750 00:39:44,054 --> 00:39:45,644 Yeah, it was a good day. 751 00:39:45,764 --> 00:39:48,581 I mean, first day's are always the hardest, right? 752 00:39:49,032 --> 00:39:50,342 Well, I should go. 753 00:39:50,495 --> 00:39:52,045 I gotta buckle him in. 754 00:39:56,349 --> 00:39:57,596 Well, this is it. 755 00:39:57,716 --> 00:40:00,026 - I am here to see you off. - Thanks. 756 00:40:01,580 --> 00:40:02,607 Really, Michael? 757 00:40:02,727 --> 00:40:04,029 Sorry, corporate policy. 758 00:40:04,539 --> 00:40:06,543 - It's not. - You might take something. 759 00:40:06,663 --> 00:40:09,827 - Don't think he's gonna take anything. - Okay, security guard. 760 00:40:11,996 --> 00:40:14,235 Oh, some kind of... alarm. 761 00:40:14,355 --> 00:40:15,315 Okay. 762 00:40:16,759 --> 00:40:18,586 Hi, Jan, it's Michael. 763 00:40:19,354 --> 00:40:20,404 I just... 764 00:40:21,478 --> 00:40:24,648 I just want to let you know that I am going to go to your... 765 00:40:24,927 --> 00:40:26,793 lamaze class tomorrow. 766 00:40:28,414 --> 00:40:32,141 And if there is any details you need to fill me in on, like... 767 00:40:33,443 --> 00:40:36,359 what, exactly, lamaze is, that would be great. 768 00:40:36,479 --> 00:40:39,363 And I will see you tomorrow morning. 769 00:40:44,515 --> 00:40:46,332 I am going to be... 770 00:40:47,097 --> 00:40:48,491 kind of a daddy. 771 00:40:54,168 --> 00:40:57,277 Party planning's a real high. Like a runner's high. 772 00:41:12,204 --> 00:41:13,562 - Oh, my god! - What? 9999 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net