1 00:00:08,534 --> 00:00:10,635 I have a reservation in your fair city 2 00:00:10,703 --> 00:00:13,138 From February 12th through the 19th, 3 00:00:13,206 --> 00:00:15,307 First week of the olympics. 4 00:00:15,375 --> 00:00:16,908 Well, we're looking forward to having you, 5 00:00:16,976 --> 00:00:19,211 So let me just pull up your information here. 6 00:00:19,278 --> 00:00:21,013 - Okeydoke. - I don't seem to have it, sir. 7 00:00:21,080 --> 00:00:22,314 What? 8 00:00:22,382 --> 00:00:24,383 I'm not seeing anything under confirmation. 9 00:00:24,450 --> 00:00:25,817 - No-- - could it be under affirmation? 10 00:00:25,885 --> 00:00:27,152 You have thousands of those. - No. 11 00:00:27,220 --> 00:00:28,854 We're just trying to look it up right now. 12 00:00:28,921 --> 00:00:30,956 i>- You did get the evite to my barbecue! 13 00:00:31,024 --> 00:00:32,290 - N--come on, dwight. - Michael-- 14 00:00:32,358 --> 00:00:34,593 Um, sir, a lot of people are trying to get 15 00:00:34,660 --> 00:00:36,962 Last-minute reservations at hotels here for the olympics, 16 00:00:37,030 --> 00:00:38,930 But we've been fully booked for months. 17 00:00:38,998 --> 00:00:40,932 Well, I have been booked for three years. 18 00:00:41,000 --> 00:00:42,701 So you should have that. 19 00:00:42,769 --> 00:00:44,169 I have always heard that british columbia 20 00:00:44,237 --> 00:00:45,704 Is a very nice place, 21 00:00:45,772 --> 00:00:48,140 But I'm not getting that from this conversation. 22 00:00:48,207 --> 00:00:50,175 Wait! I got it! Confirmation code-- 23 00:00:50,243 --> 00:00:52,978 Xv2rdm! 24 00:00:53,046 --> 00:00:54,346 [softly] oh. 25 00:00:54,414 --> 00:00:55,347 Here it is. 26 00:00:55,415 --> 00:00:56,948 - Oh... - Yep. Uh-huh. 27 00:00:57,016 --> 00:00:58,150 - Uh, thank you. - Seven nights 28 00:00:58,217 --> 00:00:59,484 In our street view economy single. 29 00:00:59,552 --> 00:01:00,919 - That's it. - Mm-hmm. 30 00:01:00,987 --> 00:01:02,521 Yeah. We changed systems a while back. 31 00:01:02,588 --> 00:01:03,955 I do apologize. 32 00:01:04,023 --> 00:01:05,524 Together: Uh-huh. Okay... 33 00:01:05,591 --> 00:01:07,025 How may I help you, mr. Scott? 34 00:01:07,093 --> 00:01:10,028 All right, I would like to cancel my reservation, please. 35 00:01:10,096 --> 00:01:12,164 Well, there is a cancellation fee for this, sir. 36 00:01:12,231 --> 00:01:14,499 Okay. Put it on my card. 37 00:01:14,567 --> 00:01:17,169 [cheerful music] 38 00:01:17,236 --> 00:01:27,179 Sync by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com 39 00:01:35,254 --> 00:01:37,222 Today jo bennett, the ceo from sabre, 40 00:01:37,290 --> 00:01:40,659 Is coming to see us here for the first time. 41 00:01:40,726 --> 00:01:44,162 She bought us sight unseen, like a mail order bride. 42 00:01:44,230 --> 00:01:45,964 [chuckling] so she's gotta be kinda nervous. 43 00:01:46,032 --> 00:01:48,300 I mean, are we ugly? Are we smart? 44 00:01:48,367 --> 00:01:50,635 Are we cool? Are we too cool? 45 00:01:50,703 --> 00:01:52,871 Do we speak english? 46 00:01:52,939 --> 00:01:56,408 [woman chuckling] 47 00:01:56,476 --> 00:01:57,409 Ha ha. 48 00:01:57,477 --> 00:01:59,044 Why, hello! 49 00:01:59,112 --> 00:02:01,213 - This is michael scott, co-regional manager 50 00:02:01,280 --> 00:02:02,247 Of this branch. 51 00:02:02,315 --> 00:02:04,116 Pleasure to meet you, miss bennett. 52 00:02:04,183 --> 00:02:05,684 Uh, that's mrs. Bennett, sweetheart. 53 00:02:05,751 --> 00:02:07,586 My husband and I are divorced, but I kept the mrs. 54 00:02:07,653 --> 00:02:09,187 Just to piss off the new wife. 55 00:02:09,255 --> 00:02:10,655 Oh... All: [chuckling] 56 00:02:10,723 --> 00:02:12,524 Well, let's take a gander around this place. 57 00:02:12,592 --> 00:02:14,259 These sure are pretty dogs. 58 00:02:14,327 --> 00:02:17,062 - They love a good crotch. - Yeah, they sure do. 59 00:02:17,130 --> 00:02:18,763 You should take that as a compliment. 60 00:02:18,831 --> 00:02:21,333 Oh, I do. 61 00:02:22,935 --> 00:02:24,603 - Hello? - Hello. 62 00:02:24,670 --> 00:02:26,905 Do you always stay seated when a lady enters the room? 63 00:02:26,973 --> 00:02:28,273 I am treating you the same as a man 64 00:02:28,341 --> 00:02:30,609 For whom I would also not stand. 65 00:02:30,676 --> 00:02:33,812 Unless it was the president. Or judge judy. 66 00:02:33,880 --> 00:02:36,081 I like that. 67 00:02:36,149 --> 00:02:37,582 - Um, this is accounting. - Uh-huh. 68 00:02:37,650 --> 00:02:38,683 Hi. 69 00:02:38,751 --> 00:02:39,918 - Good -looking group. 70 00:02:39,986 --> 00:02:42,587 Over here is meredith palmer, creed bratton. 71 00:02:42,655 --> 00:02:44,222 Another couple of heartbreakers. 72 00:02:44,290 --> 00:02:46,091 Who's this tall drink of sun tea? 73 00:02:46,159 --> 00:02:47,292 That is jim halpert. 74 00:02:47,360 --> 00:02:49,494 He is the co-regional manager of this office. 75 00:02:49,562 --> 00:02:50,829 I thought this guy was the manager. 76 00:02:50,897 --> 00:02:52,297 Oh, he is. He's the comanager. 77 00:02:52,365 --> 00:02:56,601 That's the other comanager. Two guys doing one job? 78 00:02:56,669 --> 00:02:58,236 We gotta do something about that. 79 00:02:58,304 --> 00:03:01,106 [chuckles] 80 00:03:01,174 --> 00:03:04,142 Got some valentines cards for my coworkers 81 00:03:04,210 --> 00:03:06,311 And my bro-workers. 82 00:03:06,379 --> 00:03:07,445 No. No-- 83 00:03:07,513 --> 00:03:08,914 What--no candy? 84 00:03:08,981 --> 00:03:10,749 Valentine's day, right around the corner. 85 00:03:10,816 --> 00:03:13,251 Erin and I have been on zero dates. 86 00:03:13,319 --> 00:03:15,287 So I got her a valentine's day card. 87 00:03:15,354 --> 00:03:17,789 But I didn't want to seem too eager, 88 00:03:17,857 --> 00:03:20,458 So I got cards for everyone in the whole office 89 00:03:20,526 --> 00:03:21,826 To kind of dilute it a little bit. 90 00:03:21,894 --> 00:03:22,827 Look alive. 91 00:03:22,895 --> 00:03:24,062 Ow! 92 00:03:24,130 --> 00:03:26,298 Jeez, you gave me a paper cut on my throat! 93 00:03:26,365 --> 00:03:28,133 Yeah, I have this thing about men cutting 94 00:03:28,201 --> 00:03:30,569 Or threatening to cut my throat. 95 00:03:30,636 --> 00:03:32,270 Don't try to cut my throat. 96 00:03:32,338 --> 00:03:34,639 Jo, I don't know how things work in florida-- 97 00:03:34,707 --> 00:03:36,775 Which, from your description, sounds like 98 00:03:36,842 --> 00:03:39,044 A colorful, lawless swamp. 99 00:03:39,111 --> 00:03:41,112 But here 100 00:03:41,180 --> 00:03:43,315 It takes two men to do one job, 101 00:03:43,382 --> 00:03:46,785 Where in florida it might take one very strong woman 102 00:03:46,852 --> 00:03:48,520 To do such a job. - Whoa...Whoa! 103 00:03:48,588 --> 00:03:50,188 - Whoa, whoa! - I'll take over. 104 00:03:50,256 --> 00:03:52,123 Um, what we're doing here-- 105 00:03:52,191 --> 00:03:54,593 Michael handles more of the big picture stuff, 106 00:03:54,660 --> 00:03:57,329 And I handle more of the day-to-day stuff. 107 00:03:57,396 --> 00:03:58,496 - Yeah... - So together... 108 00:03:58,564 --> 00:04:00,599 - I think I understand. - All right. 109 00:04:00,666 --> 00:04:02,701 Each of you is doing half a job. 110 00:04:02,768 --> 00:04:03,935 - No. - And sometimes I can 111 00:04:04,003 --> 00:04:05,370 Hardly handle that. 112 00:04:05,438 --> 00:04:06,738 Now, this is knucklehead talk. 113 00:04:06,806 --> 00:04:08,273 I'm not gonna abide it, you know. 114 00:04:08,341 --> 00:04:10,208 You can't give me gravy and tell me it's jelly, 115 00:04:10,276 --> 00:04:12,177 'cause gravy ain't sweet... Is it, jim? 116 00:04:12,245 --> 00:04:13,678 [whispers] I don't think so. 117 00:04:13,746 --> 00:04:15,680 - Michael? - Forget the question. 118 00:04:15,748 --> 00:04:18,049 I think one of you should return to sales 119 00:04:18,117 --> 00:04:20,051 And the other one will be manager. 120 00:04:20,119 --> 00:04:23,021 I humbly accept the management position. 121 00:04:23,089 --> 00:04:25,023 Why would you just automatically get it? 122 00:04:25,091 --> 00:04:26,691 Because...Well, jim, 123 00:04:26,759 --> 00:04:28,893 Where I'm from, there're two types of folk-- 124 00:04:28,961 --> 00:04:30,228 Those who ain't, 125 00:04:30,296 --> 00:04:32,864 And those who are kne e-high on a grasshopper. 126 00:04:32,932 --> 00:04:35,200 Which type ain't you ain't? 127 00:04:35,268 --> 00:04:37,902 Y'all come back now. 128 00:04:37,970 --> 00:04:39,371 Do you even know what that means? 129 00:04:39,438 --> 00:04:40,672 Yes. 130 00:04:40,740 --> 00:04:42,774 Well, I'm gonna let this marinate, so you can go. 131 00:04:42,842 --> 00:04:43,775 - Um... - You can go on. 132 00:04:43,843 --> 00:04:45,010 Yep. 133 00:04:45,077 --> 00:04:46,811 Shoo. 134 00:04:46,879 --> 00:04:49,414 I'm joleen bennett. Jo for short. 135 00:04:49,482 --> 00:04:51,316 I'm a breast cancer survivor. 136 00:04:51,384 --> 00:04:54,085 Close, personal friends with nancy pelosi, 137 00:04:54,153 --> 00:04:56,354 And truman capote and I slept with three of the same guys. 138 00:04:56,422 --> 00:04:58,890 When I was a little girl, I was terrified to fly, 139 00:04:58,958 --> 00:05:01,326 And now I have my own pilot's license. 140 00:05:01,394 --> 00:05:02,827 I am ceo of sabre international, 141 00:05:02,895 --> 00:05:04,329 And I sell the best damn printers 142 00:05:04,397 --> 00:05:06,598 And all-in-one machines korea can make. 143 00:05:06,666 --> 00:05:07,999 Pleased to meet you. 144 00:05:08,067 --> 00:05:09,567 Whoa, traffic jam. 145 00:05:09,635 --> 00:05:11,236 - Uh-oh! Traffic jam on route 3. 146 00:05:11,304 --> 00:05:13,104 - Beep beep! - Beep beep! 147 00:05:13,172 --> 00:05:14,372 20 people dead in a pileup. 148 00:05:14,440 --> 00:05:17,108 There's blood everywhere! [both giggling] 149 00:05:17,176 --> 00:05:19,411 Um, I got you a valentine's card. 150 00:05:19,478 --> 00:05:21,713 - You did? - Yep. 151 00:05:21,781 --> 00:05:23,882 Oh, a bird and a dog. 152 00:05:23,949 --> 00:05:25,517 Yeah, well, it's snoopy and woodstock. 153 00:05:25,584 --> 00:05:28,553 - You named them? - Uh, charles schulz did. 154 00:05:28,621 --> 00:05:29,921 I thought it was relevant 155 00:05:29,989 --> 00:05:31,856 'cause I got you all those birds for christmas. 156 00:05:31,924 --> 00:05:33,692 Remember? - Uh, yeah, I do remember. 157 00:05:33,759 --> 00:05:35,794 Aw, they love each other. 158 00:05:35,861 --> 00:05:37,295 Oh, look at that. They sure do. 159 00:05:37,363 --> 00:05:38,630 I hadn't noticed. 160 00:05:38,698 --> 00:05:40,932 Oh, it smells really good too. 161 00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:42,334 Yeah. It's roger federer for men. 162 00:05:42,401 --> 00:05:43,535 I sprayed some in there. 163 00:05:43,602 --> 00:05:46,638 Andy, whoa! Thank you very much. 164 00:05:46,706 --> 00:05:48,773 It's got pheromones in it. 165 00:05:48,841 --> 00:05:50,075 - Hey. - Hi. 166 00:05:50,142 --> 00:05:51,876 Uh...Just choosin' seats. 167 00:05:51,944 --> 00:05:53,378 Not getting married. 168 00:05:53,446 --> 00:05:55,447 Chop-chop, little onion. 169 00:05:55,514 --> 00:05:57,282 Jo, there's books in my chair. 170 00:05:57,350 --> 00:05:58,650 That's right, darling. 171 00:05:58,718 --> 00:06:01,052 Now you're the proud new owner of a sabre handbook 172 00:06:01,120 --> 00:06:03,722 And my autobiography. 173 00:06:03,789 --> 00:06:06,157 Now, you all must be in a tizzy. 174 00:06:06,225 --> 00:06:08,460 I can see it on your faces. I mean, what's going on now? 175 00:06:08,527 --> 00:06:10,895 I mean, who owns dunder mifflin, right? 176 00:06:10,963 --> 00:06:13,665 I mean, sabre? What's that? 177 00:06:13,733 --> 00:06:15,400 Some company we never heard of 178 00:06:15,468 --> 00:06:17,602 From down in tallahassee? 179 00:06:17,670 --> 00:06:20,472 Where is that? Near mars? 180 00:06:20,539 --> 00:06:22,774 No, we know. Texas. 181 00:06:22,842 --> 00:06:25,310 Now, dunder mifflin has an arm's reach 182 00:06:25,378 --> 00:06:28,012 Into all these small businesses all over the northeast. 183 00:06:28,080 --> 00:06:30,415 And now we're gonna take that arm... 184 00:06:30,483 --> 00:06:34,085 And we're gonna start selling... 185 00:06:34,153 --> 00:06:35,453 Printers. 186 00:06:35,521 --> 00:06:37,122 I could manage my way around that. 187 00:06:37,189 --> 00:06:38,923 They're the easiest to use printers in the market. 188 00:06:38,991 --> 00:06:41,826 I will try to manage my excitement. 189 00:06:41,894 --> 00:06:45,497 I have been saying the word "manager" a lot 190 00:06:45,564 --> 00:06:49,968 So whenever jo thinks manager, she thinks of me. 191 00:06:50,035 --> 00:06:52,370 Camel cigarettes did the same thing with joe camel 192 00:06:52,438 --> 00:06:54,439 By making him look like a penis. 193 00:06:54,507 --> 00:06:56,808 I can't even go near a cigarette now 194 00:06:56,876 --> 00:06:58,443 Without thinking of a penis. 195 00:06:58,511 --> 00:07:00,044 And vice versa. 196 00:07:00,112 --> 00:07:01,479 I think that's it. 197 00:07:01,547 --> 00:07:03,314 So we're all good. 198 00:07:03,382 --> 00:07:05,450 Thanks, y'all. - I, um... 199 00:07:12,124 --> 00:07:13,958 Oh, my god. 200 00:07:14,026 --> 00:07:15,693 I guess andy likes me. 201 00:07:15,761 --> 00:07:17,695 I never thought of him in that way. 202 00:07:17,763 --> 00:07:19,297 But I guess in most romantic comedies, 203 00:07:19,365 --> 00:07:20,799 The guy you're supposed to be with 204 00:07:20,866 --> 00:07:22,867 Is the one that you never thought of in that way. 205 00:07:22,935 --> 00:07:24,602 You might have even thought he was annoying 206 00:07:24,670 --> 00:07:27,372 Or possibly homosexual. 207 00:07:27,440 --> 00:07:28,640 So check this out. 208 00:07:28,707 --> 00:07:30,275 According to the handbook, 209 00:07:30,342 --> 00:07:32,010 You could make more money as a salesman 210 00:07:32,077 --> 00:07:33,244 Than as a manager. 211 00:07:33,312 --> 00:07:34,913 They have all these incentive programs. 212 00:07:34,980 --> 00:07:36,748 I ran your numbers from last year. 213 00:07:36,816 --> 00:07:39,217 i>- This is way more than I make now. 214 00:07:39,285 --> 00:07:40,919 I don't think I'm gonna miss being manager. 215 00:07:40,986 --> 00:07:42,987 You know, some people say they're not in it for the money. 216 00:07:43,055 --> 00:07:44,956 Well, with all due respect to this job, 217 00:07:45,024 --> 00:07:46,958 I think I'm definitely in it for the money. 218 00:07:47,026 --> 00:07:49,060 And, quite honestly, the women. 219 00:07:49,128 --> 00:07:51,362 [click] hey. Got a second? 220 00:07:51,430 --> 00:07:53,264 - Sure. - All right. 221 00:07:53,332 --> 00:07:54,466 What, are you here to tell me 222 00:07:54,533 --> 00:07:56,301 That you think I would be a better manager 223 00:07:56,368 --> 00:07:58,403 And that you are sorry for being such a jerk? 224 00:07:58,471 --> 00:07:59,904 Actually...Yeah. 225 00:07:59,972 --> 00:08:01,773 What? 226 00:08:01,841 --> 00:08:02,774 Exactly that. 227 00:08:02,842 --> 00:08:04,108 I think that you 228 00:08:04,176 --> 00:08:07,712 Absolutely deserve the manager position more than I do. 229 00:08:07,780 --> 00:08:09,080 [laughs] what? 230 00:08:09,148 --> 00:08:11,282 Really? - Yeah. 231 00:08:11,350 --> 00:08:13,351 [laughing] wow! Wow! 232 00:08:13,419 --> 00:08:16,788 * la la la la, hello, oscar * 233 00:08:16,856 --> 00:08:18,256 Michael. Reading. 234 00:08:18,324 --> 00:08:20,358 - What are you reading? - The atlantic. 235 00:08:20,426 --> 00:08:22,627 Oh, that is my favorite ocean--I love it! 236 00:08:22,695 --> 00:08:24,195 I'm so happy right now. 237 00:08:24,263 --> 00:08:26,698 No! I can't keep it a secret any longer. 238 00:08:26,765 --> 00:08:28,099 Jim's stepping down to salesman. 239 00:08:28,167 --> 00:08:30,768 I am going to be the sole manager once again. 240 00:08:30,836 --> 00:08:32,604 I should step into sales myself. 241 00:08:32,671 --> 00:08:34,572 Why? Is there an untapped gay market? 242 00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:37,408 Sabre has no caps on commissions. 243 00:08:37,476 --> 00:08:41,379 He can make a lot more money in sales. 244 00:08:45,117 --> 00:08:46,784 Where did you get that information? 245 00:08:46,852 --> 00:08:48,052 Manual. 246 00:08:48,120 --> 00:08:49,487 Manuel who? 247 00:08:49,555 --> 00:08:52,557 Mm-hmm. Well, according to the manual, 248 00:08:52,625 --> 00:08:54,759 There is no cap on commissions. 249 00:08:54,827 --> 00:08:57,195 I have been hustled. 250 00:08:59,064 --> 00:09:00,932 [quietly] son of a bitch. 251 00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:02,767 Pardon me. - Oh. Speak of the devil. 252 00:09:02,835 --> 00:09:05,270 We were just talking about you. Have a seat. 253 00:09:05,337 --> 00:09:07,305 - Okay. - Now, jim here is, uh... 254 00:09:07,373 --> 00:09:09,641 Thinking about taking himself out of the running 255 00:09:09,708 --> 00:09:10,642 For being manager. 256 00:09:10,709 --> 00:09:11,643 - Yep. - Really? 257 00:09:11,710 --> 00:09:15,113 Oh, that is so sweet of you! 258 00:09:15,180 --> 00:09:16,915 But... 259 00:09:16,982 --> 00:09:20,018 I cannot accept, because I have been thinking about it, 260 00:09:20,085 --> 00:09:22,186 And I think I want to go back to sales. 261 00:09:22,254 --> 00:09:23,354 - Really? - Mm-hmm. 262 00:09:23,422 --> 00:09:24,522 - Really? - Yeah. 263 00:09:24,590 --> 00:09:26,090 You can take the man out of the salesman, 264 00:09:26,158 --> 00:09:27,659 But you can't take the sales out of salesman. 265 00:09:27,726 --> 00:09:29,694 Well, I think you're both being a little too modest. 266 00:09:29,762 --> 00:09:31,129 No, I really, really think michael 267 00:09:31,196 --> 00:09:33,598 Is better at being manager for so many reasons. 268 00:09:33,666 --> 00:09:35,133 - Mm -mm. No. 269 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:36,668 I think I would be bad. 270 00:09:36,735 --> 00:09:39,070 I...Would sleep in my office, 271 00:09:39,138 --> 00:09:40,672 And I would sexually harass people. 272 00:09:40,739 --> 00:09:42,473 Why would you do that? 273 00:09:42,541 --> 00:09:44,309 I'm turning myself in right now. 274 00:09:44,376 --> 00:09:45,577 You know, michael, 275 00:09:45,644 --> 00:09:47,478 You have more experience in sales and management, 276 00:09:47,546 --> 00:09:48,980 So I'm gonna defer to your judgment. 277 00:09:49,048 --> 00:09:50,782 Thank you. 278 00:09:50,849 --> 00:09:52,650 I think you will become the salesman, 279 00:09:52,718 --> 00:09:54,786 And congratulations... 280 00:09:54,853 --> 00:09:57,488 You're gonna be the new manager of this branch! 281 00:09:57,556 --> 00:09:58,489 Great! That's great. 282 00:09:58,557 --> 00:09:59,991 Congratulations. 283 00:10:00,059 --> 00:10:03,561 [quietly] have fun signing my commission checks, boss. 284 00:10:06,051 --> 00:10:08,352 Oh! Michael marked his heights. 285 00:10:08,420 --> 00:10:10,154 He's...Grown. 286 00:10:10,222 --> 00:10:13,290 Mm. [both chuckle] 287 00:10:16,694 --> 00:10:18,795 Bobcat, this is dragon. 288 00:10:18,863 --> 00:10:21,531 Listen, he's been promoted to sole manager. 289 00:10:21,599 --> 00:10:23,233 We have got to step this up. 290 00:10:23,300 --> 00:10:26,236 Meet me behind the dumpster in 90 seconds. 291 00:10:26,303 --> 00:10:28,872 89, 88... 292 00:10:28,939 --> 00:10:31,508 You're 20 minutes late. 293 00:10:31,575 --> 00:10:32,509 Um... 294 00:10:32,576 --> 00:10:34,077 I was at another dumpster. 295 00:10:34,145 --> 00:10:36,012 Just admit you lost track of time. 296 00:10:36,080 --> 00:10:37,814 Ryan and I have been meeting up 297 00:10:37,882 --> 00:10:40,216 To work on our diabolical plot against jim. 298 00:10:40,284 --> 00:10:42,685 Ryan is always late for our meetings. 299 00:10:42,753 --> 00:10:45,989 I wish I had a lair. 300 00:10:46,056 --> 00:10:47,657 i>- Did you see saw? 301 00:10:47,725 --> 00:10:50,326 Course I seesaw. Mose and I seesaw all the time. 302 00:10:50,394 --> 00:10:51,628 No. Uh, the movie. 303 00:10:51,695 --> 00:10:53,997 Did you see the movie saw? 304 00:10:54,064 --> 00:10:55,498 Oh. Yeah. Great film. 305 00:10:55,566 --> 00:10:57,367 Almost as fun as going on a seesaw. 306 00:10:57,434 --> 00:11:00,069 Okay, the reason these movies are so popular 307 00:11:00,137 --> 00:11:03,339 Is the element of psychological torment. 308 00:11:03,407 --> 00:11:05,275 I like where you're going with this. 309 00:11:05,342 --> 00:11:06,676 Continue. 310 00:11:06,744 --> 00:11:09,679 Can we lure him into an old warehouse or something? 311 00:11:09,747 --> 00:11:10,680 I have an old barn. 312 00:11:10,748 --> 00:11:11,948 It's kinda smelly... - Yes! 313 00:11:12,016 --> 00:11:13,416 But that might be a plus. Okay, then what? 314 00:11:13,484 --> 00:11:16,419 i>- We do what they did in saw. 315 00:11:18,789 --> 00:11:21,090 I mean, we don't kill him, obviously. 316 00:11:21,158 --> 00:11:22,492 - I don't-- - I have a mask... 317 00:11:22,560 --> 00:11:25,428 Okay. That's your idea? Exactly like in the movie? 318 00:11:25,496 --> 00:11:28,231 That is the most idiotic thing I have ever heard in my life! 319 00:11:28,299 --> 00:11:30,233 Well, suggest something else then, don't just-- 320 00:11:30,301 --> 00:11:31,668 He's supposed to cut his leg off? 321 00:11:31,735 --> 00:11:33,036 - Don't just criticize my idea! - Think! 322 00:11:33,103 --> 00:11:36,439 You think of something then! 323 00:11:36,507 --> 00:11:37,941 Michael, I'm worried that, uh, 324 00:11:38,008 --> 00:11:40,076 Not all your toys are gonna fit on your new desk. 325 00:11:40,144 --> 00:11:41,477 How is that possible? 326 00:11:41,545 --> 00:11:42,712 Well, in your old office, 327 00:11:42,780 --> 00:11:44,514 There were all those ledges and extra space-- 328 00:11:44,582 --> 00:11:45,882 No excuses, erin. Come on! 329 00:11:45,950 --> 00:11:47,717 Make it happen. 330 00:11:47,785 --> 00:11:49,986 You know, I actually think that I should get back to work. 331 00:11:50,054 --> 00:11:52,622 Jim asked me to do some stuff, and he's manager. 332 00:11:54,258 --> 00:11:55,692 Oh. Yeah. Fine, fine. 333 00:11:55,759 --> 00:11:56,693 - Okay. - Leave it here. 334 00:11:56,760 --> 00:11:57,861 All right. 335 00:11:57,928 --> 00:11:59,796 I have to make some sales anyway. 336 00:11:59,864 --> 00:12:02,031 Who should I call with my magic sales fingers? 337 00:12:02,099 --> 00:12:05,735 [telephone rings] 338 00:12:05,803 --> 00:12:07,570 [ringing] 339 00:12:07,638 --> 00:12:09,706 Michael scott, head of sales. 340 00:12:09,773 --> 00:12:13,176 You gotta do something, man. You can't just sit there. 341 00:12:16,881 --> 00:12:18,815 The new I.T. Guy. 342 00:12:18,883 --> 00:12:20,617 Nick. 343 00:12:20,684 --> 00:12:22,085 - Nick. - I think he's the key. 344 00:12:22,152 --> 00:12:24,254 He's very trusting. He's looking for friends. 345 00:12:24,321 --> 00:12:26,489 He's been given an awesome amount of power 346 00:12:26,557 --> 00:12:28,458 And does not know how to wield it. 347 00:12:28,525 --> 00:12:30,326 Like frodo. 348 00:12:30,394 --> 00:12:32,962 Why don't you just let me handle the tolkien references, 349 00:12:33,030 --> 00:12:34,464 Okay, dumb jock? 350 00:12:34,531 --> 00:12:36,833 Well, I think he can be corrupted. 351 00:12:36,901 --> 00:12:38,735 Like gollum. 352 00:12:38,802 --> 00:12:41,104 Smeagol was corrupted 353 00:12:41,171 --> 00:12:42,805 And became gollum. 354 00:12:42,873 --> 00:12:44,807 I might start a diabolical plot against him 355 00:12:44,875 --> 00:12:46,142 After this one. 356 00:12:47,578 --> 00:12:49,078 Who's hungry? 357 00:12:49,146 --> 00:12:50,680 - What is that? - That's ants on a log. 358 00:12:50,748 --> 00:12:53,349 Michael would always have me bring them in at 2:30 359 00:12:53,417 --> 00:12:55,451 And say, "who's hungry?" - [laughs] oh. 360 00:12:55,519 --> 00:12:57,487 I'm fine. Thank you, though. 361 00:12:57,554 --> 00:12:59,489 Do you want me to spin you in your chair and make you dizzy? 362 00:12:59,556 --> 00:13:01,491 - Why would I want to do that? - It's a thinking technique. 363 00:13:01,558 --> 00:13:03,426 All the top executives do it. 364 00:13:03,494 --> 00:13:05,028 It keeps the brain moving, 365 00:13:05,095 --> 00:13:07,630 And a...Spinning brain is a working brain. 366 00:13:07,698 --> 00:13:10,133 For now, I'm just gonna go back to work here. 367 00:13:10,200 --> 00:13:11,434 - Oh, sure. - Yeah. Thank you. 368 00:13:11,502 --> 00:13:14,370 Well... 369 00:13:14,438 --> 00:13:16,673 It will be a pleasure doing business with you. 370 00:13:16,740 --> 00:13:19,509 Thanks. Bye-bye. 371 00:13:19,576 --> 00:13:21,678 [train whistle sound] 372 00:13:21,745 --> 00:13:23,046 I just got a new account. 373 00:13:23,113 --> 00:13:25,949 The gentleman's club in carbondale. 374 00:13:26,016 --> 00:13:27,684 It is called curves. 375 00:13:27,751 --> 00:13:29,552 I went by there the other day. 376 00:13:29,620 --> 00:13:31,187 Saw some of the women walking in. 377 00:13:31,255 --> 00:13:32,855 Not...Really my cup of tea. 378 00:13:32,923 --> 00:13:34,958 Actually, kevin, you might like it. 379 00:13:35,025 --> 00:13:36,859 Nice. 380 00:13:36,927 --> 00:13:39,028 You know, we really don't announce out loud 381 00:13:39,096 --> 00:13:40,463 Our sales that much. 382 00:13:40,531 --> 00:13:42,732 Why not? It's part of the sales experience. 383 00:13:42,800 --> 00:13:44,367 It's not really 1992 anymore. 384 00:13:44,435 --> 00:13:45,501 Well, okay. 385 00:13:45,569 --> 00:13:47,236 [laughter] 386 00:13:48,772 --> 00:13:50,873 "you brighten my day with the sound of your voice. 387 00:13:50,941 --> 00:13:52,675 "you bring so much laughter and love. 388 00:13:52,743 --> 00:13:54,010 "you're everything to me, 389 00:13:54,078 --> 00:13:56,713 And I was so blessed when god sent you here to me." 390 00:13:56,780 --> 00:13:57,747 - Jeez louise. - I know. 391 00:13:57,815 --> 00:13:59,816 Obsessed with me much? 392 00:13:59,883 --> 00:14:02,685 - Well, everyone got one. - What did yours say? 393 00:14:02,753 --> 00:14:05,488 "friends are worth sharing a doghouse with." 394 00:14:05,556 --> 00:14:07,357 It's no wonder 395 00:14:07,424 --> 00:14:09,559 That andy gave kelly such a romantic card. 396 00:14:09,626 --> 00:14:11,294 I can't compete with her. 397 00:14:11,362 --> 00:14:13,296 That girl can sing and dance 398 00:14:13,364 --> 00:14:15,765 And gets all of her clothes at the mall... 399 00:14:15,833 --> 00:14:17,700 And I feel like such a fool 400 00:14:17,768 --> 00:14:19,769 For thinking that andy was only going after one girl. 401 00:14:19,837 --> 00:14:22,171 'cause andy bernard is a playboy, 402 00:14:22,239 --> 00:14:24,540 And why shouldn't he be? 403 00:14:24,608 --> 00:14:27,610 He's got it all. 404 00:14:27,678 --> 00:14:31,948 Ho ho. There he is, the I.T. Guy. 405 00:14:32,016 --> 00:14:34,083 See you discovered the break room. 406 00:14:34,151 --> 00:14:35,752 - Uh, yep. - I imagine 407 00:14:35,819 --> 00:14:37,553 One of the best things about being an I.T. Guy 408 00:14:37,621 --> 00:14:39,589 Is you get to know everyone's computer passwords. 409 00:14:39,656 --> 00:14:41,924 You know, I actually don't. 410 00:14:41,992 --> 00:14:43,192 [all laugh] 411 00:14:43,260 --> 00:14:45,128 Listen. I know you have to say that, 412 00:14:45,195 --> 00:14:47,463 But we got a little problem here. 413 00:14:47,531 --> 00:14:49,198 There is a employee named jim halpert, 414 00:14:49,266 --> 00:14:51,334 And he's doi some terrible things, okay? 415 00:14:51,402 --> 00:14:53,669 He's molesting people via the internet, 416 00:14:53,737 --> 00:14:55,705 And we need to stop him. 417 00:14:55,773 --> 00:14:58,207 I think that you should call the cops-- 418 00:14:58,275 --> 00:15:01,010 No. The cops called us. 419 00:15:01,078 --> 00:15:04,914 So I'm gonna need you to give me the password 420 00:15:04,982 --> 00:15:06,749 To jim halpert's computer. 421 00:15:06,817 --> 00:15:08,584 I don't know what to tell you, man, I'm sorry. 422 00:15:08,652 --> 00:15:10,353 I just can't give out his password like that. 423 00:15:10,421 --> 00:15:13,089 Nick, we could make things very... 424 00:15:13,157 --> 00:15:15,758 Very difficult for you. 425 00:15:15,826 --> 00:15:17,660 Are you... 426 00:15:17,728 --> 00:15:19,095 You threatening me? 427 00:15:19,163 --> 00:15:21,297 Threatening you? 428 00:15:21,365 --> 00:15:23,499 No. 429 00:15:33,610 --> 00:15:36,813 What is that smell? Do you smell that? 430 00:15:36,880 --> 00:15:39,749 What is that? 431 00:15:39,817 --> 00:15:41,484 Like a sulfur deposit under here? 432 00:15:41,552 --> 00:15:43,319 Michael...Stop. 433 00:15:43,387 --> 00:15:45,655 No, I'm serious. We don't have to put up-- 434 00:15:45,722 --> 00:15:47,757 Is it the dogs? - [whispers] michael. 435 00:15:47,825 --> 00:15:48,925 You know what? 436 00:15:48,992 --> 00:15:50,059 We don't have to deal with this. 437 00:15:50,127 --> 00:15:52,595 I'm going to google sulfur maps. 438 00:15:52,663 --> 00:15:56,599 Michael, it's phyllis. 439 00:15:56,667 --> 00:15:58,367 No, this is geological. 440 00:15:58,435 --> 00:16:00,770 I sent an email out to everyone in this area 441 00:16:00,838 --> 00:16:02,939 That this might be a side effect 442 00:16:03,006 --> 00:16:05,575 To my new allergy medication I'm on. 443 00:16:05,642 --> 00:16:08,211 - Are you kidding me? - No. 444 00:16:11,048 --> 00:16:12,448 And you guys are okay with this? 445 00:16:12,516 --> 00:16:14,150 She sent an email... 446 00:16:32,903 --> 00:16:34,403 It's not 'cause of the smell. 447 00:16:34,471 --> 00:16:37,373 I'm just expecting a nosebleed. 448 00:16:38,976 --> 00:16:40,176 Oh, my god. 449 00:16:43,301 --> 00:16:45,669 Oh...[giggling] you scared me. 450 00:16:45,737 --> 00:16:47,170 I'm sorry. I thought you saw me. 451 00:16:47,238 --> 00:16:49,339 I didn't see you. 452 00:16:49,407 --> 00:16:51,909 And you were there all along. 453 00:16:51,976 --> 00:16:54,378 Well, I warmed it up for you. 454 00:16:54,445 --> 00:16:55,679 So should be good to go. 455 00:16:55,747 --> 00:16:56,880 Cool. Thanks. 456 00:16:56,948 --> 00:16:59,983 Bye, andy. 457 00:17:03,821 --> 00:17:06,323 - That was weird. - No, it ain't. 458 00:17:06,391 --> 00:17:08,825 We all saw the valentine you gave her. 459 00:17:08,893 --> 00:17:10,861 I don't even know what that card said. 460 00:17:10,929 --> 00:17:12,863 Believe me, if I got that card, 461 00:17:12,931 --> 00:17:17,367 We'd be in the bathroom doing it right...Now. 462 00:17:17,435 --> 00:17:18,936 Oh! 463 00:17:21,839 --> 00:17:23,540 Hey. 464 00:17:23,608 --> 00:17:26,009 Hey. 465 00:17:26,077 --> 00:17:27,611 You know, it's funny, I used to stand in here 466 00:17:27,679 --> 00:17:29,580 And wish I was out there. 467 00:17:29,647 --> 00:17:31,348 Now I'm out there, and I wish I was in here. 468 00:17:31,416 --> 00:17:32,950 Well, the grass is always greener. 469 00:17:33,017 --> 00:17:35,786 Yeah. Except there's no grass out there. 470 00:17:35,853 --> 00:17:38,088 It's just a farty dirt patch. 471 00:17:38,156 --> 00:17:39,623 Well, it's what you wanted. 472 00:17:39,691 --> 00:17:41,558 I really need my job back. 473 00:17:41,626 --> 00:17:43,560 We made a terrible mistake here. 474 00:17:43,628 --> 00:17:46,129 For the record, I fought this, all right? 475 00:17:46,197 --> 00:17:48,765 And now...I'm not really sure what we do. 476 00:17:48,833 --> 00:17:51,935 We make a poster that says "happy opposite day," 477 00:17:52,003 --> 00:17:53,637 And she sees it on the way out-- 478 00:17:53,705 --> 00:17:54,638 That's stupid. 479 00:17:54,706 --> 00:17:56,607 Oh, I wish we had one of those 480 00:17:56,674 --> 00:17:59,610 Amnesia flashlights from men in black and just-- 481 00:17:59,677 --> 00:18:01,411 Hey, what was that movie 482 00:18:01,479 --> 00:18:03,380 Where their boss was within earshot, 483 00:18:03,448 --> 00:18:05,882 And they could have just gone and talked to her? 484 00:18:05,950 --> 00:18:07,284 - Lethal weapon? - That's it. 485 00:18:07,352 --> 00:18:09,252 I think we should do it the lethal weapon way. 486 00:18:09,320 --> 00:18:11,555 You two are grown-ass men. What do I have to do, 487 00:18:11,623 --> 00:18:13,790 Fire you and get two people in here 488 00:18:13,858 --> 00:18:15,392 Who don't need so much management? 489 00:18:15,460 --> 00:18:17,327 Wha...? What I'm saying-- 490 00:18:17,395 --> 00:18:19,396 Michael's saying that he's better at being a manager, 491 00:18:19,464 --> 00:18:21,264 And I agree, because he's a better people person, 492 00:18:21,332 --> 00:18:22,566 Weird--weirdly. - And weirdly, 493 00:18:22,634 --> 00:18:24,601 I'm a good dog person, right, guys? 494 00:18:24,669 --> 00:18:26,003 See? They love me. 495 00:18:26,070 --> 00:18:28,972 Fine. I don't care which one of you does which job. 496 00:18:29,040 --> 00:18:31,808 Just...Stop meetin' with me to talk about it. 497 00:18:31,876 --> 00:18:32,809 All right. 498 00:18:32,877 --> 00:18:34,811 All right. 499 00:18:34,879 --> 00:18:35,812 [cell phone rings] - oh. 500 00:18:35,880 --> 00:18:37,648 I gotta take this. 501 00:18:37,715 --> 00:18:40,150 Yep. Uh, finish walking my dogs for me. 502 00:18:40,218 --> 00:18:44,688 And don't ride 'em. Lotta people try to ride 'em. 503 00:18:48,493 --> 00:18:50,494 'scuse me, everyone. Please check your emails. 504 00:18:50,561 --> 00:18:53,130 I just sent you the following message: 505 00:18:53,197 --> 00:18:55,432 "coworkers, you may have received a valentine from me. 506 00:18:55,500 --> 00:18:57,534 "please understand this does not mean 507 00:18:57,602 --> 00:18:59,336 That I like you in any way." 508 00:18:59,404 --> 00:19:01,605 You don't even like us as friends? 509 00:19:01,673 --> 00:19:04,307 Phyllis, you guys are like my closest friends. 510 00:19:04,375 --> 00:19:07,044 I just mean I don't like like you. 511 00:19:07,111 --> 00:19:08,478 What are we, five? 512 00:19:08,546 --> 00:19:09,913 "please don't read into this card. 513 00:19:09,981 --> 00:19:12,816 Yours, in professionalism, nard dog." 514 00:19:12,884 --> 00:19:15,118 Um, why did I just receive a mass email from you 515 00:19:15,186 --> 00:19:17,020 That said that you don't like me? 516 00:19:17,088 --> 00:19:19,389 Do you realize how hard that makes me like you, andy? 517 00:19:19,457 --> 00:19:21,124 It's-- 518 00:19:21,192 --> 00:19:23,326 That wasn't-- 519 00:19:23,394 --> 00:19:25,629 I like someone else. 520 00:19:25,697 --> 00:19:27,731 Who? 521 00:19:27,799 --> 00:19:29,132 [snorts] 522 00:19:29,200 --> 00:19:32,636 It's...Not... 523 00:19:32,704 --> 00:19:36,173 Whether or not... 524 00:19:36,240 --> 00:19:37,708 [mumbles] 525 00:19:37,775 --> 00:19:38,842 Who? What? 526 00:19:38,910 --> 00:19:42,412 Yeah, I guess andy never liked kelly. 527 00:19:42,480 --> 00:19:44,347 How about that? 528 00:19:44,415 --> 00:19:46,216 [inhales] 529 00:19:46,284 --> 00:19:48,085 Oh, it smells good in here. 530 00:19:48,152 --> 00:19:51,021 It sure does. Okay, we have your... 531 00:19:51,089 --> 00:19:53,490 Space heater, your humidifier, your dehumidifier, 532 00:19:53,558 --> 00:19:56,093 Your fan, your foot fan, and your food dehydrator. 533 00:19:56,160 --> 00:19:59,162 Erin...What about my keyboard? 534 00:20:00,732 --> 00:20:02,666 [soft electronic music] 535 00:20:02,734 --> 00:20:04,735 Ah. 536 00:20:04,802 --> 00:20:06,136 So good to be home. 537 00:20:06,204 --> 00:20:08,605 * * 538 00:20:08,673 --> 00:20:09,940 How 'bout a little bossa nova? 539 00:20:10,007 --> 00:20:12,175 Oh... 540 00:20:12,243 --> 00:20:15,145 [bossa nova plays] 541 00:20:15,213 --> 00:20:22,953 * * 542 00:20:23,020 --> 00:20:25,255 He looks happy. 543 00:20:25,323 --> 00:20:26,690 Yep. 544 00:20:26,758 --> 00:20:29,059 Well, well, well. Hmm. 545 00:20:29,127 --> 00:20:32,028 Boss for...What was it? 546 00:20:32,096 --> 00:20:35,031 Oh...4 1/2 hours? 547 00:20:35,099 --> 00:20:37,434 New record... Low. 548 00:20:37,502 --> 00:20:40,103 Previous record, henry rostin. 549 00:20:40,171 --> 00:20:41,538 Boss for nine years, four months. 550 00:20:41,606 --> 00:20:42,973 And he only left 551 00:20:43,040 --> 00:20:44,708 Because he had family matters to attend to, 552 00:20:44,776 --> 00:20:46,143 And he--what-- 553 00:20:51,616 --> 00:20:53,717 Michael? 554 00:20:56,106 --> 00:20:57,273 I can't help but think 555 00:20:57,341 --> 00:20:58,900 That something we did made this possible. 556 00:21:20,901 --> 00:21:28,901 Sync by honeybunny ww.addic7ed.com 9999 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net