1 00:00:00,423 --> 00:00:01,198 It is 6 AM, 2 00:00:01,233 --> 00:00:04,269 and Deangelo and I are about to go house to house 3 00:00:04,304 --> 00:00:06,972 to give everybody their Dundies nomination certificate 4 00:00:07,007 --> 00:00:08,841 just like the oscars. Yes. 5 00:00:08,875 --> 00:00:12,277 And this happens every year? Every year this happens. 6 00:00:12,312 --> 00:00:15,681 You have a lot to learn, my friend. 7 00:00:15,715 --> 00:00:17,082 Well, you know, why don't we try it, 8 00:00:17,117 --> 00:00:20,252 and if it goes good, it'll be part of my tradition. 9 00:00:20,286 --> 00:00:22,855 Why are you even saying that? You're gonna love it. 10 00:00:22,889 --> 00:00:26,959 Here we go. 11 00:00:26,993 --> 00:00:28,994 This one. This way. 12 00:00:31,431 --> 00:00:32,831 Nice house. 13 00:00:32,866 --> 00:00:34,967 - Surprise! - Congratulations! 14 00:00:35,001 --> 00:00:36,368 Yep. 15 00:00:36,403 --> 00:00:40,339 You and Pam have both been nominated for Dundie awards. 16 00:00:40,373 --> 00:00:41,607 Okay. 17 00:00:41,641 --> 00:00:43,442 - Rawr! - There we go! 18 00:00:43,476 --> 00:00:45,310 Have Pam come out. No, no, she's not here. 19 00:00:45,345 --> 00:00:46,712 What's going on? 20 00:00:46,746 --> 00:00:47,846 Stay in bed. 21 00:00:47,881 --> 00:00:49,648 - Congratulations. - Stanley, we love you. 22 00:00:49,682 --> 00:00:51,050 Have you lost your mind? 23 00:00:51,084 --> 00:00:54,720 Get off my property before I call the police. 24 00:00:54,754 --> 00:00:56,488 All right, we got it. Good. 25 00:00:56,523 --> 00:00:58,490 - Leave it at the door? - Yeah, that's fine. 26 00:00:58,525 --> 00:01:00,692 Okay. 27 00:01:05,432 --> 00:01:08,801 Hey, Toby, you suck! 28 00:01:08,835 --> 00:01:10,202 Is this an employee of ours? 29 00:01:11,604 --> 00:01:13,405 Go, go, go, go, go, go, go. 30 00:01:13,440 --> 00:01:15,874 Gosh, I've never seen this place in the daylight. 31 00:01:15,909 --> 00:01:19,745 This reminds me of Katrina. 32 00:01:19,779 --> 00:01:21,513 Here we go. 33 00:01:21,548 --> 00:01:22,915 All right. 34 00:01:22,949 --> 00:01:25,384 You got it? Are we set? 35 00:01:25,418 --> 00:01:27,486 Hello? 36 00:01:29,189 --> 00:01:32,191 I'm so busted. Walk of shame. 37 00:01:32,225 --> 00:01:35,027 Do you usually leave your door unlocked and ajar? 38 00:01:36,229 --> 00:01:37,396 Nice! 39 00:01:37,430 --> 00:01:38,664 I got a Dundie nomination. 40 00:01:38,698 --> 00:01:40,365 - Yes, you did. - Yes, that's right. 41 00:01:40,400 --> 00:01:41,800 No big deal. Congratulations, Meredith. 42 00:01:41,835 --> 00:01:43,769 All right, well, we should head out. 43 00:01:43,803 --> 00:01:45,170 No, no, no, you gotta stay. 44 00:01:45,205 --> 00:01:46,605 No, no, no, I have vienna sausages 45 00:01:46,639 --> 00:01:47,940 and I have napkins. 46 00:01:47,974 --> 00:01:50,342 Let me fix you breakfast. 47 00:01:50,376 --> 00:01:52,678 I'm not going in there. 48 00:01:55,748 --> 00:01:57,216 Go. 49 00:02:03,289 --> 00:02:08,651 Corrected by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com 50 00:02:12,065 --> 00:02:13,198 Good morning, Erin. 51 00:02:13,233 --> 00:02:14,800 Oh, hey, didn't see you. 52 00:02:14,834 --> 00:02:16,068 Any big plans for tonight? 53 00:02:16,102 --> 00:02:17,236 I don't know. 54 00:02:17,270 --> 00:02:19,138 Maybe volunteer at the women's shelter, 55 00:02:19,172 --> 00:02:20,272 go to bed. 56 00:02:20,306 --> 00:02:22,074 Or, I don't know, 57 00:02:22,108 --> 00:02:25,277 maybe I'm going to the Dundies! 58 00:02:26,446 --> 00:02:28,447 You are getting so funny. 59 00:02:28,481 --> 00:02:31,049 Very good. 60 00:02:31,084 --> 00:02:33,318 The Dundies are my baby, 61 00:02:33,353 --> 00:02:37,022 and they need to go on. 62 00:02:37,056 --> 00:02:38,590 When Larry king died, 63 00:02:38,625 --> 00:02:40,259 they didn't just cancel his show. 64 00:02:40,293 --> 00:02:43,462 They got piers Morgan to come in and do his show, 65 00:02:43,496 --> 00:02:47,833 and that way Larry lives on. 66 00:02:50,036 --> 00:02:51,803 Anything can happen at the Dundies. 67 00:02:51,838 --> 00:02:54,973 They're like the golden globes but less mean. 68 00:02:55,008 --> 00:02:57,176 And I just want us to all have a good time. 69 00:02:57,210 --> 00:02:58,644 Just a little announcement, folks. 70 00:02:58,678 --> 00:03:01,580 Remember, the Dundies is a black tie affair. 71 00:03:01,614 --> 00:03:03,115 Black tie optional. 72 00:03:03,149 --> 00:03:05,350 Every day is black tie optional. 73 00:03:05,385 --> 00:03:07,753 Fyi, tonight we will be hosting 74 00:03:07,787 --> 00:03:09,087 at Louie Volpe's. 75 00:03:09,122 --> 00:03:10,689 - Nice. - I love their breadsticks. 76 00:03:10,723 --> 00:03:12,624 Oh, their breadsticks are like crack. 77 00:03:12,659 --> 00:03:13,992 I love when people say "like crack" 78 00:03:14,027 --> 00:03:15,827 who have obviously never done crack. 79 00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:17,629 Well, their breadsticks are like what then, Ryan? 80 00:03:17,664 --> 00:03:18,830 What can I use? 81 00:03:18,865 --> 00:03:20,065 I don't know, something from your world. 82 00:03:20,099 --> 00:03:22,100 "The breadsticks are like scrapbooking." 83 00:03:22,135 --> 00:03:24,136 You're right. No, I'm a middle class fraud. 84 00:03:24,170 --> 00:03:25,537 Shh, okay, okay, okay. 85 00:03:25,572 --> 00:03:26,672 Everybody's right. 86 00:03:26,706 --> 00:03:28,874 They're like breadsticks on steroids. 87 00:03:28,908 --> 00:03:30,842 Right? Yeah, that's great. 88 00:03:30,877 --> 00:03:32,511 So as you know, the Dundies are my legacy. 89 00:03:32,545 --> 00:03:34,680 So I'm going to need to train a replacement. 90 00:03:34,714 --> 00:03:37,115 So this year I have decided to have a co-host. 91 00:03:37,150 --> 00:03:39,818 And that person is... 92 00:03:42,288 --> 00:03:44,156 Deangelo. 93 00:03:45,825 --> 00:03:48,527 Always the Padawan, never the Jedi. 94 00:03:48,561 --> 00:03:50,229 Thank you, Michael, 95 00:03:50,263 --> 00:03:53,398 but I will have to pass. 96 00:03:53,433 --> 00:03:55,067 Think of it as part of your training. 97 00:03:55,101 --> 00:03:56,568 I'm not much of a performer, 98 00:03:56,603 --> 00:03:58,370 unless you count singing in the shower. 99 00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:02,207 Boy, okay. 100 00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:04,376 Okay, well, we'll work on it. 101 00:04:04,410 --> 00:04:06,678 Look, I'm very, very bad. Very bad. 102 00:04:06,713 --> 00:04:08,247 You're doing it. 103 00:04:08,281 --> 00:04:11,149 Guys, I want you to help us work on some banter. 104 00:04:11,184 --> 00:04:13,418 Yes, I love banter. 105 00:04:13,453 --> 00:04:16,221 But I hate witty banter. 106 00:04:16,256 --> 00:04:17,389 Here we go. 107 00:04:17,423 --> 00:04:20,726 So, Deangelo, you and I have a lot in common. 108 00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:22,594 You lost 200 pounds, 109 00:04:22,629 --> 00:04:25,097 and I lose my car keys every morning. 110 00:04:26,199 --> 00:04:27,266 That is true. 111 00:04:27,300 --> 00:04:28,934 We do share some similarities. 112 00:04:28,968 --> 00:04:31,603 I know how you can fix one of those problems. 113 00:04:31,638 --> 00:04:33,338 For me, it was portion control. 114 00:04:33,373 --> 00:04:35,240 For you, you need a key chain. 115 00:04:35,275 --> 00:04:36,842 Maybe hang it on the-- 116 00:04:36,876 --> 00:04:39,411 Okay, okay, you know what, I didn't actually lose my keys. 117 00:04:39,445 --> 00:04:42,014 - So this did not happen? - Mm-kay. 118 00:04:42,048 --> 00:04:45,517 There needs to be what you call a rat-a-tat. 119 00:04:45,551 --> 00:04:47,452 And right now it's all rat and no tat. 120 00:04:47,487 --> 00:04:48,954 Ryan, come on up here. 121 00:04:48,988 --> 00:04:51,490 Deangelo, if you would just-- Tap Deangelo out. 122 00:04:51,524 --> 00:04:53,191 - If I can see it-- - Just watch us. 123 00:04:53,226 --> 00:04:55,761 Okay, Ryan, how are you today? 124 00:04:55,795 --> 00:04:57,162 Why don't you ask my therapist? 125 00:04:57,196 --> 00:04:58,630 My mom certainly pays her enough. 126 00:04:58,665 --> 00:05:01,266 There you go! Lovely. 127 00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:03,468 Regis and Kelly. Nice. 128 00:05:03,503 --> 00:05:04,970 Use that as an inspiration. 129 00:05:05,004 --> 00:05:06,305 - Okay. - Just be funny. 130 00:05:06,339 --> 00:05:09,408 Uh, you sir, are we having fun tonight? 131 00:05:09,442 --> 00:05:11,209 - Having a great time. - Oh, good, good. 132 00:05:11,244 --> 00:05:12,978 Where were you on September 11th? 133 00:05:13,012 --> 00:05:15,614 No, gosh. No, no, stop, stop. 134 00:05:15,648 --> 00:05:17,115 What? This is so weird. 135 00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:19,484 If I'm conducting a meeting, good to go. 136 00:05:19,519 --> 00:05:21,019 But if I think of it as a performance, 137 00:05:21,054 --> 00:05:22,921 I fall apart obviously. 138 00:05:22,955 --> 00:05:24,856 Why don't you think of hosting the Dundies 139 00:05:24,891 --> 00:05:26,758 like you're just running a meeting? 140 00:05:26,793 --> 00:05:27,926 No, no, no. 141 00:05:27,960 --> 00:05:30,062 This is the performance of your life. 142 00:05:30,096 --> 00:05:31,596 Why don't you just privately in your own head 143 00:05:31,631 --> 00:05:32,764 think of it like a meeting? 144 00:05:32,799 --> 00:05:34,933 Jim, please, no loopholes. 145 00:05:34,967 --> 00:05:36,468 Mike, why do you have to control 146 00:05:36,502 --> 00:05:37,903 how he perceives it in his mind? 147 00:05:37,937 --> 00:05:39,905 This is my last Dundies ever. 148 00:05:39,939 --> 00:05:42,307 If I want mind control over him, 149 00:05:42,342 --> 00:05:45,410 is that too much to ask? 150 00:05:45,445 --> 00:05:47,979 Me, mo, me, mo. 151 00:05:48,014 --> 00:05:50,682 Good. Good. Good. Good. 152 00:05:50,717 --> 00:05:53,819 Now tell me something terrible that happened in your childhood. 153 00:05:53,853 --> 00:05:56,955 When I was very young, my mother divorced my father 154 00:05:56,989 --> 00:05:59,291 and I had to go to court to choose between them. 155 00:05:59,325 --> 00:06:00,459 Too personal. 156 00:06:00,493 --> 00:06:02,060 I don't wanna hear about that stuff. 157 00:06:02,095 --> 00:06:03,829 Let's try this, put this on. 158 00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:07,833 I am going to turn this on. 159 00:06:07,867 --> 00:06:10,602 And turn the volume all the way up 160 00:06:10,636 --> 00:06:11,937 so you can't-- That's right! 161 00:06:11,971 --> 00:06:13,839 You're not going to be able to hear yourself. 162 00:06:13,873 --> 00:06:16,942 Read this and it's going to sound perfect. 163 00:06:16,976 --> 00:06:18,276 "The Dundies are com-- 164 00:06:18,311 --> 00:06:20,979 "All about coming together! 165 00:06:21,013 --> 00:06:23,882 "And recognizing the indomitability 166 00:06:23,916 --> 00:06:25,484 of the human spirit!" 167 00:06:25,518 --> 00:06:26,985 Say it with an accent. 168 00:06:27,019 --> 00:06:28,687 - "The Dundies--" 169 00:06:28,721 --> 00:06:30,856 - The Dundies! - The Dundies! 170 00:06:30,890 --> 00:06:32,858 I just don't understand the desire to push 171 00:06:32,892 --> 00:06:34,192 sweet potato fries on me. 172 00:06:34,227 --> 00:06:35,394 I just want regular fries. 173 00:06:35,428 --> 00:06:36,395 Yeah. 174 00:06:39,165 --> 00:06:41,066 Hey, Erin, everything okay? 175 00:06:41,100 --> 00:06:42,701 Get away from the car. He's gonna see you. 176 00:06:42,735 --> 00:06:43,869 Who's gonna see us? 177 00:06:43,903 --> 00:06:45,470 Just get in, get in. Just get in. 178 00:06:45,505 --> 00:06:47,873 Get in the car? 179 00:06:47,907 --> 00:06:49,608 Please! Sorry. 180 00:06:49,642 --> 00:06:52,077 Get in. 181 00:06:52,111 --> 00:06:53,445 Sorry, sorry, sorry. 182 00:06:53,479 --> 00:06:54,679 What's wrong? 183 00:06:54,714 --> 00:06:56,348 I eat lunch in the car now. 184 00:06:56,382 --> 00:06:58,216 It's my alone time. 185 00:06:58,251 --> 00:07:00,752 It's just nice to have some time away from Gabe. 186 00:07:00,787 --> 00:07:03,021 Why don't you want to eat lunch with your boyfriend? 187 00:07:03,055 --> 00:07:05,824 I really don't like spending time with him. 188 00:07:05,858 --> 00:07:08,460 Don't you think it's better to tell him the truth now, 189 00:07:08,494 --> 00:07:10,996 you know, rather than waste more of his time? 190 00:07:14,333 --> 00:07:16,535 - I think I'm gonna go. - What? 191 00:07:16,569 --> 00:07:18,370 - I think you got this. - Okay. 192 00:07:18,404 --> 00:07:19,471 - Okay? - Yeah. 193 00:07:19,505 --> 00:07:20,639 - All right? - Okay. 194 00:07:20,673 --> 00:07:21,840 - Feel better. - Thank you, Jim. 195 00:07:21,874 --> 00:07:23,008 I'm sorry, 196 00:07:23,042 --> 00:07:27,112 that just wasn't interesting to me. 197 00:07:27,146 --> 00:07:28,780 I can't just dump him, Pam. 198 00:07:28,815 --> 00:07:30,849 I'm not like you. I can't be mean. 199 00:07:30,883 --> 00:07:33,018 - Wait, when am I-- 200 00:07:33,052 --> 00:07:35,454 You just have to be clear and firm. 201 00:07:35,488 --> 00:07:37,189 You know, just tell him you don't love him. 202 00:07:37,223 --> 00:07:39,691 Just be honest with him. 203 00:07:42,728 --> 00:07:45,864 - Hi. - Appalling. 204 00:07:45,898 --> 00:07:48,900 Eyesore. 205 00:07:48,935 --> 00:07:50,735 Surprisingly adequate. 206 00:07:50,770 --> 00:07:52,304 Okay, everyone, the festivities commence 207 00:07:52,338 --> 00:07:55,106 in four seconds. 208 00:07:55,141 --> 00:07:57,876 Deangelo, Jo's on the phone for you. 209 00:07:57,910 --> 00:07:59,945 Hello? 210 00:07:59,979 --> 00:08:02,447 Deangelo, we're in serious horse manure here. 211 00:08:02,482 --> 00:08:05,650 The Dundies are tonight, and we ain't got no host. 212 00:08:05,685 --> 00:08:06,885 Oh, no! 213 00:08:06,919 --> 00:08:08,920 Luckily, I have someone for you. 214 00:08:08,955 --> 00:08:10,155 - Billy crystal? - Better. 215 00:08:10,189 --> 00:08:11,957 Neil Patrick Harris? 216 00:08:11,991 --> 00:08:14,092 He's in little shop of horrors on Broadway. 217 00:08:14,126 --> 00:08:15,760 No, we need Michael Scott, 218 00:08:15,795 --> 00:08:19,998 the best darn Dundies host both sides of the Mississippi. 219 00:08:20,032 --> 00:08:23,969 I gotta find Michael Scott. 220 00:08:24,003 --> 00:08:25,937 Hmm, and then I gotta... 221 00:08:25,972 --> 00:08:28,840 Get him to the Dundies! 222 00:08:28,875 --> 00:08:31,843 Hey, can you help me find Michael Scott, Angela? 223 00:08:31,878 --> 00:08:35,780 My boyfriend can. He's a state senator. 224 00:08:35,815 --> 00:08:38,350 - Mm-hmm. - Oh, no, he can't help, 225 00:08:38,384 --> 00:08:40,185 because that title has no meaning. 226 00:08:41,721 --> 00:08:43,288 Try Jim, Deangelo. He'll be able to help. 227 00:08:44,657 --> 00:08:47,926 Jim, do you know where I can find Michael Scott? 228 00:08:47,960 --> 00:08:51,830 Oh, I totally don't know where Michael is, dude. 229 00:08:51,864 --> 00:08:53,865 Hey, you want to listen to some records? 230 00:08:53,900 --> 00:08:56,868 No one's listening to me! I'm running out of time. 231 00:08:56,903 --> 00:09:00,972 What-- What are you talking about? 232 00:09:04,043 --> 00:09:06,278 I've fallen and I can't get up. 233 00:09:06,312 --> 00:09:09,014 Maybe I just need to look into my heart. 234 00:09:09,048 --> 00:09:12,083 Deangelo, where is Michael Scott? 235 00:09:12,118 --> 00:09:13,552 I'm here. 236 00:09:13,586 --> 00:09:14,719 In a good way. 237 00:09:14,754 --> 00:09:16,354 I've been here the whole time. 238 00:09:16,389 --> 00:09:18,156 The analytical part of me 239 00:09:18,190 --> 00:09:19,624 wants to examine it. 240 00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:22,827 But I know it has no content. 241 00:09:22,862 --> 00:09:25,297 Ladies and gentlemen, please stand up 242 00:09:25,331 --> 00:09:26,398 for your co-host of the evening, 243 00:09:26,432 --> 00:09:28,199 Michael Gary Scott. 244 00:09:30,703 --> 00:09:34,239 Please remain standing for your other co-host 245 00:09:34,273 --> 00:09:36,241 and new manager, 246 00:09:36,275 --> 00:09:42,147 Deangelo Jeremetrius Vickers! 247 00:09:48,387 --> 00:09:50,088 Is that part of the-- 248 00:09:54,961 --> 00:09:56,595 Hey. 249 00:09:56,629 --> 00:09:57,696 Deangelo, what are you doing? 250 00:09:57,730 --> 00:09:58,830 There's a live audience out there. 251 00:09:58,864 --> 00:10:01,266 Just go do it by yourself, or get Ryan. 252 00:10:01,300 --> 00:10:03,602 No, Ryan would never do it. It's too on the radar. 253 00:10:03,636 --> 00:10:04,736 Look, look. 254 00:10:04,770 --> 00:10:07,739 The boss hosts the Dundies. 255 00:10:07,773 --> 00:10:08,974 It's sort of our perk. 256 00:10:09,008 --> 00:10:11,676 This was not part of the job description. 257 00:10:11,711 --> 00:10:13,011 Okay, listen to me. 258 00:10:13,045 --> 00:10:14,079 You're not doing this for me. 259 00:10:14,113 --> 00:10:15,280 You're not doing this for you. 260 00:10:15,314 --> 00:10:16,648 You're not even doing this for them. 261 00:10:16,682 --> 00:10:18,817 What am I doing it for? 262 00:10:18,851 --> 00:10:20,986 You're doing it for all those kids out there 263 00:10:21,020 --> 00:10:22,854 eating off the Louie Volpe's kids' menu, 264 00:10:22,888 --> 00:10:24,756 who are wondering, "does it get better?" 265 00:10:24,790 --> 00:10:28,393 What I want you to do is I want you to say "it's showtime." 266 00:10:28,427 --> 00:10:29,494 Get out there. 267 00:10:29,528 --> 00:10:32,030 I can't. 268 00:10:32,064 --> 00:10:34,366 - Say it. - Stop hitting me. 269 00:10:34,400 --> 00:10:35,700 You can do it. Just say it. 270 00:10:35,735 --> 00:10:38,303 Hit me again. 271 00:10:38,337 --> 00:10:41,006 Now hit me. 272 00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:42,507 One, two, three. 273 00:10:42,541 --> 00:10:44,442 It's showtime. All right, here we go. 274 00:10:50,483 --> 00:10:52,984 Okay, okay, sorry about the delay, everybody. 275 00:10:53,019 --> 00:10:56,321 But we were at the DMV waiting in line. 276 00:10:57,823 --> 00:11:01,292 Fall asleep right after sex, huh, guys? 277 00:11:01,327 --> 00:11:03,528 Nope. Go back to the script. 278 00:11:03,562 --> 00:11:07,032 There are a lot of great salesmen in this office. 279 00:11:07,066 --> 00:11:11,002 But one of our great salesmen is also a great dad, 280 00:11:11,037 --> 00:11:13,505 and a close personal friend of mine. 281 00:11:13,539 --> 00:11:17,375 Jim Halpert, best dad Dundie! 282 00:11:21,180 --> 00:11:23,515 Wow, I do not parent for the awards, 283 00:11:23,549 --> 00:11:25,450 but I gotta tell you, it feels pretty good. 284 00:11:25,484 --> 00:11:27,352 Um, Cece, if you're watching this at home, 285 00:11:27,386 --> 00:11:28,753 it's way past your bedtime. 286 00:11:28,788 --> 00:11:30,622 By the way, how did this get televised? 287 00:11:30,656 --> 00:11:31,623 Thanks. 288 00:11:32,658 --> 00:11:34,059 - Well done. - I don't know. 289 00:11:34,093 --> 00:11:36,061 Maybe being a good dad is just following your own compass. 290 00:11:36,095 --> 00:11:37,228 I don't know. I don't know. 291 00:11:37,263 --> 00:11:38,997 Thank you. 292 00:11:41,467 --> 00:11:42,834 Didn't think to mention me, huh? 293 00:11:42,868 --> 00:11:44,002 Didn't I? 294 00:11:44,036 --> 00:11:47,405 Which moves us to best mom Dundie. 295 00:11:47,440 --> 00:11:50,909 This person, well, I guess we all sort of consider a mom 296 00:11:50,943 --> 00:11:54,045 around the office-- Meredith Palmer! 297 00:12:02,121 --> 00:12:03,722 I'll tell you one thing, 298 00:12:03,756 --> 00:12:05,756 I'm not gonna be a good mom tonight. 299 00:12:05,791 --> 00:12:07,058 Excuse me. 300 00:12:07,093 --> 00:12:08,393 Can I get a photo of the best mom 301 00:12:08,427 --> 00:12:09,861 and the best dad, please? 302 00:12:09,895 --> 00:12:11,863 Step on up. 303 00:12:11,897 --> 00:12:12,897 Well, I gotta go do this. 304 00:12:12,932 --> 00:12:14,566 Why? 305 00:12:14,600 --> 00:12:16,634 Big smiles, folks. There they are. 306 00:12:16,669 --> 00:12:18,636 Year after year, I catch a lot of flak 307 00:12:18,671 --> 00:12:20,305 on this particular award, 308 00:12:20,339 --> 00:12:22,307 because year after year, I present this award 309 00:12:22,341 --> 00:12:24,242 to a guy instead of a girl. 310 00:12:24,276 --> 00:12:29,380 Hottest in the office goes to Danny Cordray! 311 00:12:31,751 --> 00:12:32,884 How do I feel about not winning 312 00:12:32,918 --> 00:12:34,719 hottest in the office this year? 313 00:12:34,754 --> 00:12:36,187 Um, I'm very relieved. 314 00:12:36,222 --> 00:12:37,922 How do you-- How do you judge something like that? 315 00:12:37,957 --> 00:12:39,657 What is his criteria even? 316 00:12:39,692 --> 00:12:42,393 It's-- It's so subjective. 317 00:12:42,428 --> 00:12:44,496 Stanley Hudson is a grump. 318 00:12:44,530 --> 00:12:45,797 Everybody knows that. 319 00:12:45,831 --> 00:12:48,566 But did you know that Stanley Hudson 320 00:12:48,601 --> 00:12:50,935 is also the face of a debilitating disease 321 00:12:50,970 --> 00:12:51,970 known as diabetes. 322 00:12:53,939 --> 00:12:57,642 The diabetes award goes to Stanley Hudson! 323 00:12:57,676 --> 00:13:00,645 Come on up here, you sick bastard. 324 00:13:00,679 --> 00:13:02,680 We're proud of you. 325 00:13:02,715 --> 00:13:04,382 I have diabetes too, 326 00:13:04,416 --> 00:13:06,951 but you don't see me making a big deal about it. 327 00:13:06,986 --> 00:13:10,355 They say he's going to be my right-hand man. 328 00:13:10,389 --> 00:13:12,590 Ad lib masturbation joke. 329 00:13:12,625 --> 00:13:14,793 Nope. I hate this. 330 00:13:14,827 --> 00:13:16,094 I hate it so much. 331 00:13:16,128 --> 00:13:17,462 Dwight Shrute, 332 00:13:17,496 --> 00:13:20,865 please accept this promising assistant manager Dundie. 333 00:13:20,900 --> 00:13:23,201 Thank you. 334 00:13:23,235 --> 00:13:24,636 Thanks so much. 335 00:13:24,670 --> 00:13:26,437 Um, I want to dedicate this award 336 00:13:26,472 --> 00:13:28,506 to something that, uh, 337 00:13:28,541 --> 00:13:30,742 we take for granted in our daily lives. 338 00:13:30,776 --> 00:13:32,377 And that is the humble trash can. 339 00:13:32,411 --> 00:13:34,979 This is for you, trash can! 340 00:13:42,154 --> 00:13:43,621 Who gave you those crayons? 341 00:13:43,656 --> 00:13:45,623 I brought them from home. 342 00:13:45,658 --> 00:13:46,858 Do you have a red? 343 00:13:46,892 --> 00:13:48,193 This is a cloth tablecloth. 344 00:13:48,227 --> 00:13:49,994 You can't color on it. 345 00:13:50,029 --> 00:13:51,863 Oh, really? 346 00:13:51,897 --> 00:13:56,067 Did you know herpes affects one out of every five 347 00:13:56,101 --> 00:13:58,069 sexually active adults? 348 00:13:58,103 --> 00:14:01,973 Pippi Longstocking. Ronald McDonald's wife. 349 00:14:02,007 --> 00:14:03,341 Ron Howard. Ron Weasley. 350 00:14:03,375 --> 00:14:04,676 What do they all have in common? 351 00:14:04,710 --> 00:14:06,477 Redheads. 352 00:14:06,512 --> 00:14:09,047 Erin Hannon... 353 00:14:09,081 --> 00:14:10,515 Come on up here to receive 354 00:14:10,549 --> 00:14:13,852 your cutest redhead in the office award! 355 00:14:13,886 --> 00:14:16,354 This is bull! 356 00:14:18,357 --> 00:14:19,891 Thank you! Thank you! 357 00:14:19,925 --> 00:14:21,059 Thank you! 358 00:14:21,093 --> 00:14:22,360 This is the first award 359 00:14:22,394 --> 00:14:24,028 I've ever won in my entire life. 360 00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:27,131 People were right about the Dundies. 361 00:14:27,166 --> 00:14:31,035 They are magical. 362 00:14:31,070 --> 00:14:33,137 But I don't feel it, 363 00:14:33,172 --> 00:14:36,207 and I think that's because I'm not with the right person. 364 00:14:36,242 --> 00:14:38,543 Gabe... 365 00:14:38,577 --> 00:14:40,612 - What? - We should break up. 366 00:14:40,646 --> 00:14:42,680 What? 367 00:14:42,715 --> 00:14:45,416 I'm not attracted to you. 368 00:14:45,451 --> 00:14:49,687 I just--I cringe when you talk. 369 00:14:49,722 --> 00:14:51,289 I have to be honest. 370 00:14:51,323 --> 00:14:53,691 Right? Right, Pam? 371 00:14:57,630 --> 00:14:59,731 Thank you for hearing me. 372 00:14:59,765 --> 00:15:02,133 Okay, well, this is embarrassing. 373 00:15:02,167 --> 00:15:06,204 Um, I'm obviously really angry at Erin. 374 00:15:06,238 --> 00:15:10,642 Here comes that quarter-life crisis everyone's talking about. 375 00:15:12,711 --> 00:15:14,078 All right, I'm gonna-- I'm gonna go. 376 00:15:15,814 --> 00:15:18,549 Let's-- There you go. 377 00:15:18,584 --> 00:15:21,452 Damn, that was cold. 378 00:15:21,487 --> 00:15:23,621 It is difficult to recognize 379 00:15:23,656 --> 00:15:25,423 the person who will be replacing you. 380 00:15:25,457 --> 00:15:27,425 But he is a good guy. 381 00:15:27,459 --> 00:15:31,930 So the Michael Scott award for best Dundies host 382 00:15:31,964 --> 00:15:33,765 goes to Deangelo Vickers. 383 00:15:42,141 --> 00:15:46,177 Speech, speech, speech, speech! 384 00:15:46,211 --> 00:15:49,480 Hold on. Hold on one second. 385 00:15:49,515 --> 00:15:52,684 Okay. Crank it. 386 00:15:54,386 --> 00:15:55,653 I want to--I want-- 387 00:15:55,688 --> 00:15:57,121 I feel truly blessed, 388 00:15:57,156 --> 00:15:59,090 uh, to be working with all of you. 389 00:15:59,124 --> 00:16:01,259 You know, before this all started, 390 00:16:01,293 --> 00:16:03,261 uh, funny story, I was in the bathroom 391 00:16:03,295 --> 00:16:04,929 vomiting and vomiting. 392 00:16:04,964 --> 00:16:08,066 The men's room. That's why it's been shut down 393 00:16:08,100 --> 00:16:09,300 for most of the evening. That's it! 394 00:16:09,335 --> 00:16:11,002 This is important. He's expressing himself. 395 00:16:11,036 --> 00:16:12,337 - No. - Hosts don't get Dundies. 396 00:16:12,371 --> 00:16:14,472 This-- This is truly special for me... 397 00:16:16,108 --> 00:16:18,042 And, uh, anyway, it's so much lighter! 398 00:16:18,077 --> 00:16:19,177 - We're done. - That's it. 399 00:16:20,612 --> 00:16:21,879 - Michael, are we-- What? - We're done. We're done. 400 00:16:25,284 --> 00:16:29,187 My last Dundies ever. 401 00:16:29,221 --> 00:16:32,490 I was hoping it would be more like Godfather III. 402 00:16:32,524 --> 00:16:35,026 That wrapped up the whole franchise 403 00:16:35,060 --> 00:16:38,129 in an extremely satisfying way. 404 00:16:38,163 --> 00:16:41,432 But instead, it is Godfather I. 405 00:16:41,467 --> 00:16:44,802 That was very confusing, 406 00:16:44,837 --> 00:16:47,605 had maybe three big laughs... 407 00:16:47,639 --> 00:16:49,974 Oh, well. 408 00:16:50,009 --> 00:16:51,709 Hey, Michael. 409 00:16:51,744 --> 00:16:54,012 We were thinking maybe we could keep this thing going. 410 00:16:54,046 --> 00:16:55,813 What? 411 00:16:55,848 --> 00:16:57,548 I know I'm the cause of this royal screw-up, 412 00:16:57,583 --> 00:16:59,050 but I would like to see the show go on. 413 00:16:59,084 --> 00:17:00,184 No, don't. 414 00:17:00,219 --> 00:17:01,519 You're being too hard on yourself. 415 00:17:01,553 --> 00:17:03,187 We had a very truncated rehearsal time. 416 00:17:03,222 --> 00:17:05,456 Let's grab some ice cream, go back to the office, 417 00:17:05,491 --> 00:17:06,657 and finish what we started. 418 00:17:06,692 --> 00:17:08,092 - Yeah. - Mm-hmm. 419 00:17:08,127 --> 00:17:09,827 So what you're saying is you kinda liked it. 420 00:17:09,862 --> 00:17:12,230 I've fallen and I can't get up! 421 00:17:12,264 --> 00:17:14,432 The Phyllis bit, that was pretty good, right? 422 00:17:14,466 --> 00:17:16,200 - I don't know that we need to dissect it all right now-- 423 00:17:16,235 --> 00:17:17,769 - But that got a big laugh. - It did. 424 00:17:17,803 --> 00:17:19,170 That actually got a big laugh. 425 00:17:19,204 --> 00:17:21,739 We were laughing, right? I was. 426 00:17:21,774 --> 00:17:23,408 Oh, you know what, I have to go to the bathroom. 427 00:17:23,442 --> 00:17:24,575 We're really close. 428 00:17:24,610 --> 00:17:25,910 You know, I can just 429 00:17:25,944 --> 00:17:27,178 run over to the gas station there. 430 00:17:27,212 --> 00:17:28,312 We should just wait here and not get 431 00:17:28,347 --> 00:17:29,781 good seats in the conference room? 432 00:17:29,815 --> 00:17:31,015 That's true, we wouldn't get seats together. 433 00:17:31,050 --> 00:17:32,183 Okay, yeah. I'll hold it. 434 00:17:32,217 --> 00:17:33,418 I'm fine. 435 00:17:33,452 --> 00:17:34,819 You know, despite a couple hiccups, 436 00:17:34,853 --> 00:17:36,687 I thought that went very well. 437 00:17:36,722 --> 00:17:39,657 I thought it was the worst Dundies I've ever been to. 438 00:17:39,691 --> 00:17:41,426 Man. 439 00:17:41,460 --> 00:17:44,095 Maybe you should have won the kind of a bitch award. 440 00:17:44,129 --> 00:17:46,297 Oh, gladly, I'd accept that award, 441 00:17:46,331 --> 00:17:48,933 because a bitch is a female dog. 442 00:17:48,967 --> 00:17:50,668 Okay. 443 00:17:50,702 --> 00:17:51,803 What? What are you doing? 444 00:17:54,239 --> 00:17:55,473 Please don't stop so suddenly. 445 00:17:55,507 --> 00:17:56,741 Seatbelt's pressing on my bladder. 446 00:17:56,775 --> 00:17:57,975 Why are you even wearing a seatbelt? 447 00:17:58,010 --> 00:17:59,610 You're sitting in the back seat, baby. 448 00:17:59,645 --> 00:18:00,812 What is your problem? 449 00:18:00,846 --> 00:18:01,846 I just don't see the point 450 00:18:01,880 --> 00:18:03,314 to the Dundies, okay? 451 00:18:03,348 --> 00:18:04,982 The jokes were terrible, the venue was bad, 452 00:18:05,017 --> 00:18:06,184 the fashion was boring-- 453 00:18:06,218 --> 00:18:08,086 Okay, that-- That is unfair. 454 00:18:08,120 --> 00:18:10,321 The clothing was safe but tasteful. 455 00:18:10,355 --> 00:18:12,523 And next time, why don't you pick a co-host 456 00:18:12,558 --> 00:18:14,725 that doesn't have microphone-aphobia. 457 00:18:14,760 --> 00:18:16,294 Look, whatever you're going to do, 458 00:18:16,328 --> 00:18:18,663 how long is it gonna take? Ballpark? 459 00:18:18,697 --> 00:18:21,299 'Cause I just-- I've gotta make a decision here. 460 00:18:24,870 --> 00:18:28,005 He-- He is in an all-out sprint. 461 00:18:30,609 --> 00:18:32,443 Please, excuse me. 462 00:18:32,478 --> 00:18:34,011 Here, okay. 463 00:18:34,046 --> 00:18:37,615 By his own admission, this person actually 464 00:18:37,649 --> 00:18:39,851 tried marijuana in college, 465 00:18:39,885 --> 00:18:43,254 so the doobie-doobie pothead stoner of the year award 466 00:18:43,288 --> 00:18:44,489 goes to Andy Bernard! 467 00:18:49,728 --> 00:18:51,629 There's a lot of people I'd like to thank. 468 00:18:51,663 --> 00:18:53,798 But I think we all actually want to thank you, Michael. 469 00:18:53,832 --> 00:18:55,833 Oh, thank you. 470 00:18:55,868 --> 00:18:58,369 I mean, we actually really all want to thank you 471 00:18:58,403 --> 00:19:00,371 for everything. 472 00:19:03,642 --> 00:19:05,710 Oh, my God, something's happening. 473 00:19:12,918 --> 00:19:18,222 ♪ we actually sat down and did the math 474 00:19:22,828 --> 00:19:26,130 ♪ that's how many minutes that you've worked here 475 00:19:34,273 --> 00:19:36,541 ♪ email forwards you made us read 476 00:19:41,780 --> 00:19:45,483 ♪ that's like watchidie hard 80,000 times 477 00:19:52,624 --> 00:19:54,525 ♪ I forgive you for kissing me 478 00:19:57,229 --> 00:19:59,630 ♪ oh, you got to remember to call 479 00:20:02,734 --> 00:20:05,703 ♪ love is a gift from up above 480 00:20:25,057 --> 00:20:28,292 ♪ yeah yeah you got to remember to call 481 00:20:34,933 --> 00:20:37,635 yeah, okay. 482 00:20:39,171 --> 00:20:41,472 Well, this is gonna hurt like a mother. 483 00:20:44,843 --> 00:20:46,611 Suffer from extreme repulsiveness. 484 00:20:46,645 --> 00:20:49,647 Someone in our midst is bringing that problem to light. 485 00:20:49,681 --> 00:20:52,883 Toby Flenderson, please come up here and accept 486 00:20:52,918 --> 00:20:54,385 the extreme repulsiveness award. 487 00:20:54,419 --> 00:20:56,254 Oh, that's so mean. No, it's fine. 488 00:20:56,288 --> 00:20:57,822 It's his last Dundies. 489 00:20:57,856 --> 00:20:59,223 You gotta play along, man. 490 00:20:59,258 --> 00:21:01,659 Come on, Toby. 491 00:21:01,693 --> 00:21:04,161 Here he comes! All right. 492 00:21:04,196 --> 00:21:06,230 You deserved it. 493 00:21:06,265 --> 00:21:07,898 I really disagree with this. 494 00:21:07,933 --> 00:21:09,333 I think it's kind of hateful. 495 00:21:09,368 --> 00:21:10,968 Although I am a little happy right now 496 00:21:11,003 --> 00:21:12,503 to have a platform to talk about 497 00:21:12,537 --> 00:21:14,839 the outcome of a case that I was recently a juror on, 498 00:21:14,873 --> 00:21:15,906 The Scranton strangler. 499 00:21:15,941 --> 00:21:17,775 A man's being put to death. 500 00:21:17,809 --> 00:21:19,610 I was part of the verdict, 501 00:21:19,645 --> 00:21:21,145 and I'm not so sure he's guilty anymore. 502 00:21:25,607 --> 00:21:30,815 Corrected by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com 9999 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net