1 00:00:08,574 --> 00:00:12,443 It's a beautiful morning at Dunder Mifflin-- 2 00:00:12,511 --> 00:00:14,646 Or as I like to call it... Great Bratton. 3 00:00:14,713 --> 00:00:17,348 Keep it running. 4 00:00:17,416 --> 00:00:19,817 Do I love being manager? 5 00:00:19,885 --> 00:00:22,921 I love my kids. I love real estate. 6 00:00:22,988 --> 00:00:25,189 I love ceramics. I love my job. 7 00:00:25,257 --> 00:00:26,824 I-I love wrestling. 8 00:00:26,892 --> 00:00:29,294 Find out what language this is. 9 00:00:35,968 --> 00:00:37,835 Okay. Team building. 10 00:00:37,903 --> 00:00:41,372 On this side of the room, Stanley, Phyllis, Jim, 11 00:00:41,440 --> 00:00:43,541 Ted, Elroy. 12 00:00:43,609 --> 00:00:47,478 On this side of the room, Pam, Meredith, Phyllis, Creed... 13 00:00:47,546 --> 00:00:50,715 He never called a meeting. 14 00:00:50,783 --> 00:00:52,250 Bo...Body. Bo...Body. 15 00:00:52,318 --> 00:00:55,586 What does the first "b" stand for? 16 00:00:55,654 --> 00:00:57,255 What are we doing? 17 00:00:57,323 --> 00:00:59,257 We're making acronyms. Okay! 18 00:00:59,325 --> 00:01:00,725 What does the first "b" stand for? 19 00:01:02,061 --> 00:01:03,061 Business! 20 00:01:03,128 --> 00:01:04,329 I like it! 21 00:01:04,396 --> 00:01:05,730 Business. 22 00:01:05,798 --> 00:01:07,332 Good, Kevin! 23 00:01:07,399 --> 00:01:09,100 All right, the "o"... 24 00:01:09,168 --> 00:01:11,936 We need a new manager. 25 00:01:14,640 --> 00:01:20,392 Sync by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com 26 00:01:27,820 --> 00:01:30,088 Your paper experience is very interesting. 27 00:01:30,156 --> 00:01:31,957 Do you think you could use that experience 28 00:01:32,024 --> 00:01:33,258 to inform decisions here? 29 00:01:33,326 --> 00:01:35,961 Absolutely, I-- Yes. 30 00:01:36,028 --> 00:01:38,096 In fact, I actually have a three-step plan 31 00:01:38,164 --> 00:01:40,599 that I believe could effectively double your profits. 32 00:01:40,666 --> 00:01:43,869 - Really? - Yeah. 33 00:01:43,936 --> 00:01:46,037 What is it? 34 00:01:47,373 --> 00:01:48,707 Nice try. 35 00:01:50,176 --> 00:01:51,943 Uh... I'm sorry. 36 00:01:52,011 --> 00:01:53,945 W-what is your three-step plan? 37 00:01:54,013 --> 00:01:56,915 Well, I mean, I can't just hand you my plan. 38 00:01:56,983 --> 00:01:58,116 I mean, if you guys give me the job, 39 00:01:58,184 --> 00:02:00,318 then-- Then you'll get the plan. 40 00:02:00,386 --> 00:02:02,120 Well...lt's an interview, 41 00:02:02,188 --> 00:02:03,755 and we don't know that you really have the plan. 42 00:02:03,823 --> 00:02:05,757 I'm not gonna just make up that I have a plan. 43 00:02:05,825 --> 00:02:07,626 I got a plan. Believe me, you guys want it. 44 00:02:07,693 --> 00:02:08,894 You're in paper, right? 45 00:02:08,961 --> 00:02:10,328 How do we know that if you don't... 46 00:02:10,396 --> 00:02:12,297 You could just be saying it to get the job. 47 00:02:12,365 --> 00:02:14,566 I guess I could be if I was... 48 00:02:14,634 --> 00:02:16,134 Who would do that? 49 00:02:16,202 --> 00:02:17,369 How about this. 50 00:02:17,436 --> 00:02:18,770 Why don't you give us a part of the plan, 51 00:02:18,838 --> 00:02:20,305 and that way we know you have it. 52 00:02:20,373 --> 00:02:21,506 Tell you what. 53 00:02:21,574 --> 00:02:23,141 I'll give you part three of part two. 54 00:02:23,209 --> 00:02:25,277 Not gonna give you a whole part. 55 00:02:25,344 --> 00:02:26,344 Okay. 56 00:02:26,412 --> 00:02:30,248 Color-code said document. TM. 57 00:02:32,051 --> 00:02:34,019 - Did you just trademark that? - W-what? 58 00:02:34,086 --> 00:02:36,788 That's a verbal trademark. That's an agreement. 59 00:02:36,856 --> 00:02:38,890 We are the search committee... 60 00:02:38,958 --> 00:02:40,292 Hand-picked by our CEO 61 00:02:40,359 --> 00:02:43,028 and tasked to find this branch's new manager. 62 00:02:43,095 --> 00:02:45,330 Not everyone we meet will be good, 63 00:02:45,398 --> 00:02:47,666 but someone's bound to be, right? 64 00:02:47,733 --> 00:02:48,767 And to be honest, 65 00:02:48,834 --> 00:02:50,302 I think a lot of the decent candidates 66 00:02:50,369 --> 00:02:51,469 are right here in house. 67 00:02:51,537 --> 00:02:53,505 So I'm not too worried. 68 00:02:53,573 --> 00:02:55,273 But I'm really excited to spend a lot of time 69 00:02:55,341 --> 00:02:57,175 with Toby and Gabe. 70 00:02:57,243 --> 00:03:00,011 Did you know that Gabe's last name was Lewis? 71 00:03:00,079 --> 00:03:01,980 I had no idea. 72 00:03:02,048 --> 00:03:03,181 Good morning. 73 00:03:03,249 --> 00:03:04,349 - Morning. - Good morning. 74 00:03:04,417 --> 00:03:06,184 Good morning. 75 00:03:06,252 --> 00:03:08,853 Did you have a nice drive in? 76 00:03:08,921 --> 00:03:11,356 I did. 77 00:03:11,424 --> 00:03:13,191 I have a solid relationship with Jo, 78 00:03:13,259 --> 00:03:14,793 the company's owner. 79 00:03:14,860 --> 00:03:16,294 I have management experience. 80 00:03:16,362 --> 00:03:18,330 I have a good friendship with Jim, 81 00:03:18,397 --> 00:03:20,031 the head of the search committee. 82 00:03:20,099 --> 00:03:24,436 And it doesn't hurt that I'm... 83 00:03:24,503 --> 00:03:27,138 * Black! * 84 00:03:28,741 --> 00:03:31,176 It's good. I really hope you get it. 85 00:03:31,243 --> 00:03:34,012 The manager job? Naw, I'm barely interested. 86 00:03:34,080 --> 00:03:35,513 I just can't not go for it, you know. 87 00:03:35,581 --> 00:03:36,715 It's not the Bernard way. 88 00:03:36,782 --> 00:03:38,450 We give it the old college try, 89 00:03:38,517 --> 00:03:40,418 and then in defeat, we show grace. 90 00:03:40,486 --> 00:03:42,854 Still...I'd really like to see this office 91 00:03:42,922 --> 00:03:44,923 with you in the boss's chair. 92 00:03:44,991 --> 00:03:45,957 Don't even... 93 00:03:47,226 --> 00:03:48,860 - You in the boss's chair! - Eeehhh! No. 94 00:03:48,928 --> 00:03:51,363 In my family, you don't really go out and get things. 95 00:03:51,430 --> 00:03:53,765 If you want something, you write it on a list 96 00:03:53,833 --> 00:03:55,634 and then the housekeeper goes out and gets it 97 00:03:55,701 --> 00:03:57,569 on wednesdays and Fridays. 98 00:03:57,637 --> 00:03:59,571 So...I don't know. 99 00:03:59,639 --> 00:04:02,173 I guess you could say this job is on my list and... 100 00:04:02,241 --> 00:04:06,177 We'll see what rosa comes back with. 101 00:04:09,248 --> 00:04:10,515 Did you hear anything? 102 00:04:10,583 --> 00:04:12,550 Oh...I'm sure they'll let us know 103 00:04:12,618 --> 00:04:14,386 when they get the results. 104 00:04:15,955 --> 00:04:17,822 It turns out that Erin was born 105 00:04:17,890 --> 00:04:21,426 in the basic time and region that I gave away a child. 106 00:04:21,494 --> 00:04:24,062 So Phyllis might be my mom. 107 00:04:24,130 --> 00:04:26,798 I mean, the chances are tiny, but... 108 00:04:26,866 --> 00:04:29,200 Yeah. But probably not. 109 00:04:29,268 --> 00:04:31,436 I mean, it was a big year for babies. 110 00:04:31,504 --> 00:04:33,405 Porky's had come out. Yeah. 111 00:04:33,472 --> 00:04:35,707 I'm sure I was just another porky's baby. 112 00:04:35,775 --> 00:04:37,909 But why not find out? Yeah. 113 00:04:43,649 --> 00:04:45,917 Should you really be so blatant about that? 114 00:04:45,985 --> 00:04:47,318 They won't make me manager, 115 00:04:47,386 --> 00:04:49,154 and I won't settle for anything less. 116 00:04:49,221 --> 00:04:50,955 I've gone about as far as I can here. 117 00:04:51,023 --> 00:04:52,791 That's obvious. 118 00:04:52,858 --> 00:04:54,526 Time to take my talents elsewhere. 119 00:04:54,593 --> 00:04:56,261 Are you really gonna apply for work 120 00:04:56,328 --> 00:04:57,729 at Scranton Breadworks? 121 00:04:57,797 --> 00:04:59,898 Bread is the paper of the food industry. 122 00:04:59,965 --> 00:05:03,201 You write your sandwich on it. 123 00:05:03,269 --> 00:05:05,036 Can you do any better on salary? 124 00:05:05,104 --> 00:05:07,205 Unfortunately, that range is set at corporate. 125 00:05:07,273 --> 00:05:09,274 What about mileage when I use my car? 126 00:05:09,341 --> 00:05:11,309 I mean, gas ain't cheap, you know. 127 00:05:11,377 --> 00:05:13,311 We think that 25¢ a mile is pretty generous. 128 00:05:13,379 --> 00:05:16,281 How 'bout 27 and, uh... 129 00:05:16,348 --> 00:05:17,682 When I make long-distance calls 130 00:05:17,750 --> 00:05:21,553 will they be monitored, or is it on the honor system? 131 00:05:21,620 --> 00:05:23,054 Okay. 132 00:05:28,360 --> 00:05:30,095 How odd! 133 00:05:30,162 --> 00:05:33,098 A very unusual phone call from the senator's office. 134 00:05:33,165 --> 00:05:35,300 The senator wants me to have lunch with him 135 00:05:35,367 --> 00:05:37,068 at the botanical gardens. 136 00:05:37,136 --> 00:05:38,503 The botanical gardens... 137 00:05:38,571 --> 00:05:41,773 Scranton's hidden gem. 138 00:05:41,841 --> 00:05:45,243 Don't eat any berries you don't recognize. 139 00:05:45,311 --> 00:05:49,247 How will your experience selling refinery equipment 140 00:05:49,315 --> 00:05:51,483 translate to our smaller scale here? 141 00:05:51,550 --> 00:05:52,984 You don't work in sales, do you? 142 00:05:53,052 --> 00:05:54,986 Uh...Human resources. 143 00:05:55,054 --> 00:05:58,957 You see, I sit across from a man... 144 00:05:59,024 --> 00:06:02,961 I see his face. I see his eyes. 145 00:06:03,028 --> 00:06:07,699 Now, does it matter if he wants $100 of paper 146 00:06:07,767 --> 00:06:10,702 or $100 million of deep-sea drilling equipment? 147 00:06:10,770 --> 00:06:11,970 Don't be a fool. 148 00:06:12,037 --> 00:06:14,139 He wants respect. 149 00:06:14,206 --> 00:06:16,141 He wants love. 150 00:06:16,208 --> 00:06:19,144 He wants to be younger. He wants to be attractive. 151 00:06:19,211 --> 00:06:21,613 There is no such thing 152 00:06:21,680 --> 00:06:23,882 as a product. 153 00:06:23,949 --> 00:06:26,317 Don't ever think there is. 154 00:06:26,385 --> 00:06:29,254 Ere is only sex. 155 00:06:29,321 --> 00:06:31,790 Everything is sex. 156 00:06:31,857 --> 00:06:34,692 You understand that what I'm telling you 157 00:06:34,760 --> 00:06:38,096 is a universal truth, Toby. 158 00:06:38,164 --> 00:06:39,697 Yes. 159 00:06:39,765 --> 00:06:41,366 Okay, I-I-- 160 00:06:41,433 --> 00:06:42,867 I am...I'm almost a little concerned 161 00:06:42,935 --> 00:06:46,137 that you might be overqualified for the position. 162 00:06:46,205 --> 00:06:48,773 Do you, um... Do you think that you are? 163 00:06:48,841 --> 00:06:50,341 Do I look like someone who-- 164 00:06:50,409 --> 00:06:52,210 Who'd waste my own time? 165 00:06:52,278 --> 00:06:54,179 No. 166 00:06:55,915 --> 00:06:58,516 Can y-- 167 00:06:58,584 --> 00:07:01,953 You are a man of great confidence. 168 00:07:02,021 --> 00:07:04,355 Could you speak a little more to that 169 00:07:04,423 --> 00:07:07,358 and what the role of confidence 170 00:07:07,426 --> 00:07:10,195 would be in a dialogue 171 00:07:10,262 --> 00:07:11,896 with a subordinate? 172 00:07:11,964 --> 00:07:13,798 Will you be heard? 173 00:07:13,866 --> 00:07:15,834 Will you have a voice? 174 00:07:15,901 --> 00:07:18,136 Will I steamroll over you? 175 00:07:18,204 --> 00:07:23,374 Do you feel heard right now, Jim? 176 00:07:23,442 --> 00:07:27,011 Do you have a voice right now? 177 00:07:27,079 --> 00:07:29,147 You can answer me. Yes. 178 00:07:29,215 --> 00:07:31,182 That was your choice, not mine. 179 00:07:31,250 --> 00:07:34,719 The fallacy is that it is up to the steamroller. 180 00:07:34,787 --> 00:07:37,388 It is up to the object... 181 00:07:37,456 --> 00:07:39,691 Whether it will be flattened or not. 182 00:07:39,758 --> 00:07:42,160 And I can tell just from the small interaction 183 00:07:42,228 --> 00:07:43,394 we've had already, 184 00:07:43,462 --> 00:07:45,163 you won't be flattened by anybody. 185 00:07:45,231 --> 00:07:46,431 Do you agree with me, Jim? 186 00:07:46,498 --> 00:07:49,367 - Yes. - Yes, you do. 187 00:08:09,455 --> 00:08:11,890 He creeps me out. 188 00:08:11,957 --> 00:08:14,726 But I think he might be a genius. 189 00:08:21,991 --> 00:08:23,992 Good luck, Darryl. 190 00:08:24,059 --> 00:08:25,927 Thank you. 191 00:08:25,995 --> 00:08:27,061 Think about it. 192 00:08:27,129 --> 00:08:28,863 What other mammal, besides humans, 193 00:08:28,931 --> 00:08:31,132 drinks the milk of another mammal? 194 00:08:31,200 --> 00:08:33,668 I mean, you don't see a bear drinking raccoon milk. 195 00:08:35,571 --> 00:08:38,539 So this is cool. I think we make a good fit. 196 00:08:38,607 --> 00:08:41,342 Oh. Uh, we haven't started the interview yet. 197 00:08:41,410 --> 00:08:43,511 Were you-- Were you joking? 198 00:08:45,381 --> 00:08:48,316 Uh...Yes. I was. 199 00:08:48,384 --> 00:08:51,519 Little joke. 200 00:08:51,587 --> 00:08:54,689 So how would you go about settling interpersonal conflicts 201 00:08:54,757 --> 00:08:56,157 within the office? 202 00:08:56,225 --> 00:08:58,693 I thought that was your job. 203 00:08:58,761 --> 00:09:00,995 Well, it's one of my strengths, 204 00:09:01,063 --> 00:09:02,664 but it's the manager's job. 205 00:09:04,733 --> 00:09:06,434 Well, for instance, how did you deal with it 206 00:09:06,502 --> 00:09:07,835 when two warehouse guys got into a fight? 207 00:09:07,903 --> 00:09:09,304 I'll answer that, Jim. 208 00:09:09,371 --> 00:09:12,707 I would use it as an opportunity to teach... 209 00:09:12,775 --> 00:09:16,577 Uh, about actions and consequences 210 00:09:16,645 --> 00:09:18,780 of actions. 211 00:09:26,255 --> 00:09:27,689 Who's that? 212 00:09:27,756 --> 00:09:29,624 So I think all we need is a resume, 213 00:09:29,692 --> 00:09:31,726 and we'll be good, right? 214 00:09:31,794 --> 00:09:34,062 I-I just thought you knew me. 215 00:09:34,129 --> 00:09:35,196 Yeah, it's no big deal. 216 00:09:35,264 --> 00:09:37,632 Just something that looks like that. 217 00:09:37,700 --> 00:09:38,833 Cool. 218 00:09:38,901 --> 00:09:40,835 Let me... 219 00:09:42,738 --> 00:09:44,505 Cool. 220 00:09:51,914 --> 00:09:53,981 Did, uh, you just interview? 221 00:09:54,049 --> 00:09:55,750 Oh. Unfortunately, yes. 222 00:09:59,321 --> 00:10:00,722 W-what do you mean? 223 00:10:00,789 --> 00:10:03,191 That business can't attract anyone. 224 00:10:03,258 --> 00:10:05,526 It's awful up there. 225 00:10:05,594 --> 00:10:08,629 Those people seem like they're in prison 226 00:10:08,697 --> 00:10:09,997 waiting out life sentences 227 00:10:10,065 --> 00:10:12,834 in a... Dying industry. 228 00:10:12,901 --> 00:10:15,670 Place must be horrible. 229 00:10:18,574 --> 00:10:20,775 I don't know if I want this job. 230 00:10:20,843 --> 00:10:22,009 Well, if I get this job offer, 231 00:10:22,077 --> 00:10:23,745 then I know that I'm gonna take it. 232 00:10:23,812 --> 00:10:26,347 And if I take it, I know that I'm never gonna quit. 233 00:10:26,415 --> 00:10:32,587 And then 25 years are gonna go by, and... 234 00:10:32,654 --> 00:10:34,555 I'm gonna die here. 235 00:10:34,623 --> 00:10:36,424 What makes you feel qualified to judge a place 236 00:10:36,492 --> 00:10:38,459 after a mere interview? 237 00:10:46,235 --> 00:10:49,437 What are you doing? 238 00:10:51,840 --> 00:10:53,741 Stop trying to figure me out. 239 00:10:53,809 --> 00:10:55,476 - I just did. - You can't. 240 00:10:55,544 --> 00:10:57,445 - It's done. - No, it's not. 241 00:10:57,513 --> 00:10:58,980 I know you now. I know your nature. 242 00:10:59,047 --> 00:11:01,215 You don't know me-- You don't know anything about me. 243 00:11:01,283 --> 00:11:02,550 - I'm done. - Get out of my head. 244 00:11:02,618 --> 00:11:04,619 - Not worth continuing. - Stop trying to figure me out. 245 00:11:07,856 --> 00:11:10,625 Do you even know anything about paper? 246 00:11:10,692 --> 00:11:12,093 How it's made? 247 00:11:12,161 --> 00:11:13,995 I saw an episode on how they make paper 248 00:11:14,062 --> 00:11:15,630 on sesame street. 249 00:11:18,333 --> 00:11:19,734 Get out. 250 00:11:19,802 --> 00:11:20,968 I'm gonna prevent inferior men 251 00:11:21,036 --> 00:11:22,470 from sullying my place of work 252 00:11:22,538 --> 00:11:24,806 with their weak, passionless leadership. 253 00:11:24,873 --> 00:11:27,408 Do you see my hat? No? 254 00:11:27,476 --> 00:11:30,144 That's because I just threw it in the ring. 255 00:11:30,212 --> 00:11:32,814 You guys pay for relocation, though, right? 256 00:11:32,881 --> 00:11:34,816 Well, why would you need relocation 257 00:11:34,883 --> 00:11:36,117 if you already live in Scranton? 258 00:11:36,185 --> 00:11:38,753 Well, I'd wanna move further away, you know? 259 00:11:38,821 --> 00:11:40,087 Just...Don't want any chance 260 00:11:40,155 --> 00:11:42,423 of running into my coworkers outside the office. 261 00:11:44,159 --> 00:11:46,994 Can I ask why you're leaving your current job? 262 00:11:50,165 --> 00:11:52,033 I'm leaving my other job 263 00:11:52,100 --> 00:11:54,368 because they were all... Jerks. 264 00:11:54,436 --> 00:11:56,204 Really. You know, all of them. 265 00:11:56,271 --> 00:11:58,840 You had your jerk wads and your jerk offs, so... 266 00:11:58,907 --> 00:12:01,142 Just between the wads and the offs, 267 00:12:01,210 --> 00:12:02,877 I just-- I had to get outta there. 268 00:12:02,945 --> 00:12:04,812 Is this a bad time to be doing this? 269 00:12:04,880 --> 00:12:07,782 I'm having a bad time. 270 00:12:07,850 --> 00:12:09,217 I'm sorry. 271 00:12:09,284 --> 00:12:11,652 I-if we did something to upset you, 272 00:12:11,720 --> 00:12:13,488 I-I'm sure it was inadvertent. 273 00:12:19,528 --> 00:12:21,162 Wait. 274 00:12:21,230 --> 00:12:24,799 Oh, why did I believe that weirdo in the lobby? 275 00:12:24,867 --> 00:12:27,735 These are the nicest people I ever met. 276 00:12:29,204 --> 00:12:30,805 Thank you. 277 00:12:32,741 --> 00:12:34,308 It's gorgeous, Angela. 278 00:12:34,376 --> 00:12:35,910 Yeah, I actually know about nice rings, 279 00:12:35,978 --> 00:12:37,478 and it is gorgeous. Oh...Wow. 280 00:12:37,546 --> 00:12:39,480 It's a little flashy. I mean, what am I... 281 00:12:39,548 --> 00:12:41,215 Naomi judd? 282 00:12:41,283 --> 00:12:44,151 - Tell us the freaking story! - Yeah, tell us the story. 283 00:12:44,219 --> 00:12:46,420 Okay. He took me to the replica 284 00:12:46,488 --> 00:12:48,289 of Monet's Japanese bridge. 285 00:12:48,357 --> 00:12:50,224 And then he put this flower behind my ear, 286 00:12:50,292 --> 00:12:51,692 which normally I would hate, 287 00:12:51,760 --> 00:12:53,094 'cause it's so civil rightsy. 288 00:12:53,161 --> 00:12:55,730 Then he got down on one knee and he said, 289 00:12:55,797 --> 00:12:58,566 "will you be a senator's wife?" 290 00:12:58,634 --> 00:13:01,769 Oh! He talked about himself in the third person? 291 00:13:01,837 --> 00:13:03,170 Yes, Pam. 292 00:13:03,238 --> 00:13:05,907 Not everyone is as informal as you and Jim. 293 00:13:05,974 --> 00:13:08,175 "Oh, hey, Pam, dude, whatever. 294 00:13:08,243 --> 00:13:09,377 Wanna marry me?" 295 00:13:09,444 --> 00:13:12,046 That's not accurate. 296 00:13:12,114 --> 00:13:14,415 Then I saw flashes. Reporters were there. 297 00:13:14,483 --> 00:13:17,952 They always find us. And everyone was crying. 298 00:13:18,020 --> 00:13:20,187 Even his aide. 299 00:13:20,255 --> 00:13:22,924 Angela's engaged to a gay man. 300 00:13:22,991 --> 00:13:25,426 As a gay man, I'm horrified. 301 00:13:25,494 --> 00:13:28,062 As a friend of Angela's, horrified. 302 00:13:28,130 --> 00:13:29,730 As a lover of elegant weddings, 303 00:13:29,798 --> 00:13:31,933 I'm a little excited. 304 00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:35,069 But overall, horrified. 305 00:13:35,137 --> 00:13:36,237 Andy? 306 00:13:36,305 --> 00:13:38,739 You all set? 307 00:13:40,008 --> 00:13:41,542 Okay, guys. It's time. 308 00:13:41,610 --> 00:13:44,946 It's pep talk time. Tell me what I need to hear. 309 00:13:45,013 --> 00:13:47,214 Are you sure this is a good idea? 310 00:13:47,282 --> 00:13:49,383 I hate to see you disappointed. 311 00:13:50,619 --> 00:13:52,119 I think Andy should be the boss. 312 00:13:52,187 --> 00:13:53,955 He's just so great. 313 00:13:54,022 --> 00:13:57,325 If I'm being objective, then Darryl, of course. 314 00:13:57,392 --> 00:13:59,026 So Andy, what improvements would you make 315 00:13:59,094 --> 00:14:00,995 as office manager? For starters, I really think 316 00:14:01,063 --> 00:14:02,830 we can streamline communication around here. 317 00:14:02,898 --> 00:14:04,465 Whoa. That's a very heavy accusation 318 00:14:04,533 --> 00:14:07,234 to level against Toby. 319 00:14:07,302 --> 00:14:09,737 - I wasn't a-accusing-- - Well, Toby's in charge 320 00:14:09,805 --> 00:14:10,805 of human resources. 321 00:14:10,872 --> 00:14:12,406 That would include communication. 322 00:14:12,474 --> 00:14:14,275 I think that Toby's done a fine job. 323 00:14:14,343 --> 00:14:18,179 Right. I-I-I really wasn't trying to insult a-anyone. 324 00:14:18,246 --> 00:14:20,481 I didn't think you were. 325 00:14:20,549 --> 00:14:22,249 I have two relationships with Andy. 326 00:14:22,317 --> 00:14:23,884 I have a personal relationship, 327 00:14:23,952 --> 00:14:25,853 and I have a professional relationship. 328 00:14:25,921 --> 00:14:27,788 Personally, yeah, I think he's a rat 329 00:14:27,856 --> 00:14:29,123 and I think he's responsible 330 00:14:29,191 --> 00:14:31,592 for the demise of my relationship with Erin. 331 00:14:31,660 --> 00:14:34,195 Professionally... 332 00:14:34,262 --> 00:14:36,197 He broke up the happiest couple in this office. 333 00:14:36,264 --> 00:14:37,898 How many windows are there in New York City? 334 00:14:37,966 --> 00:14:39,867 - What? - Critical thinking. 335 00:14:39,935 --> 00:14:42,403 Common on-the-spot question asked in an interview. 336 00:14:42,471 --> 00:14:45,306 Okay. Uh...Let me think. Are you counting car windows? 337 00:14:45,374 --> 00:14:47,408 No. How far away is the sun? 338 00:14:47,476 --> 00:14:49,844 Uh, 93 million Miles. 339 00:14:49,911 --> 00:14:52,813 - Is it? - Yeah. 340 00:14:52,881 --> 00:14:55,049 And the diameter of the sun is 870,000 miles, 341 00:14:55,117 --> 00:14:57,385 which makes it 109 times wider than the earth 342 00:14:57,452 --> 00:15:00,321 and 333,000 times heavier than the earth. 343 00:15:00,389 --> 00:15:01,856 Shut up about the sun. 344 00:15:01,923 --> 00:15:04,892 Shut up about the sun! 345 00:15:09,264 --> 00:15:11,732 I am unhappy with the confusing 346 00:15:11,800 --> 00:15:15,403 and, at times, confrontational nature of that meeting. 347 00:15:15,470 --> 00:15:17,304 I wanted it to go better. 348 00:15:17,372 --> 00:15:19,707 I wanted it to go better! 349 00:15:21,410 --> 00:15:22,677 Yes, there used to be a paper clip 350 00:15:22,744 --> 00:15:24,011 that would pop up and say, 351 00:15:24,079 --> 00:15:26,480 "looks like you are writing a letter or resume. 352 00:15:26,548 --> 00:15:28,449 Would you like help?" 353 00:15:28,517 --> 00:15:31,052 I believe his name was... Clippy. 354 00:15:32,254 --> 00:15:34,488 First of all, I wanna thank you 355 00:15:34,556 --> 00:15:36,891 for your years of patronizing our company. 356 00:15:36,958 --> 00:15:39,660 I've got some bad news. 357 00:15:39,728 --> 00:15:41,062 We're going out of business. 358 00:15:41,129 --> 00:15:43,230 Saving face. 359 00:15:43,298 --> 00:15:44,398 Yep, yep. 360 00:15:44,466 --> 00:15:46,567 I understand that. 361 00:15:46,635 --> 00:15:48,569 Basically everything's falling apart here. 362 00:15:48,637 --> 00:15:51,038 How is this on me? 363 00:15:51,106 --> 00:15:53,374 Hang up. 364 00:15:53,442 --> 00:15:55,443 Corporate needs you to find the differences 365 00:15:55,510 --> 00:15:59,213 between this picture and this picture. 366 00:15:59,281 --> 00:16:01,549 Intel has told us there are at least seven. 367 00:16:01,616 --> 00:16:03,517 Okay. I already see one. Gimme. 368 00:16:03,585 --> 00:16:04,819 Okay. 369 00:16:06,254 --> 00:16:08,889 They're the same picture. 370 00:16:08,957 --> 00:16:10,624 Well, I manage my department, 371 00:16:10,692 --> 00:16:13,060 and I've been doing that for several years now. 372 00:16:13,128 --> 00:16:16,363 And, God, I've learned a lot of life lessons along the way. 373 00:16:16,431 --> 00:16:18,399 Your department's just you, right? 374 00:16:18,467 --> 00:16:21,001 Yes, Jim, but I am not easy to manage. 375 00:16:21,069 --> 00:16:24,171 Great. Um, can we just... 376 00:16:24,239 --> 00:16:26,073 - What was that? - We just have 377 00:16:26,141 --> 00:16:29,944 a lot of serious candidates to get through today, so... 378 00:16:30,011 --> 00:16:32,046 Am I not a serious candidate? 379 00:16:32,114 --> 00:16:34,782 What do you want me to say? 380 00:16:34,850 --> 00:16:37,084 I mean, there's a line of qualified people out there. 381 00:16:37,152 --> 00:16:39,086 We have a video CV from England. 382 00:16:39,154 --> 00:16:40,721 Are we all just gonna pretend to-- 383 00:16:40,789 --> 00:16:43,257 okay. Um... 384 00:16:43,325 --> 00:16:45,025 What are your weaknesses? 385 00:16:45,093 --> 00:16:46,861 I don't have any, asshole. 386 00:16:49,831 --> 00:16:51,766 I want an interview. 387 00:16:53,201 --> 00:16:54,568 How's the family? Good. 388 00:16:54,636 --> 00:16:57,238 - Good? Are they good? - Yeah. 389 00:16:57,305 --> 00:16:58,873 What's your daughter's name again? 390 00:16:58,940 --> 00:16:59,974 Peepee? 391 00:17:00,041 --> 00:17:01,942 - Peepa. - Peepa. How is she? 392 00:17:02,010 --> 00:17:03,878 - Great. - Great! 393 00:17:03,945 --> 00:17:06,213 Oh, that's great. 394 00:17:06,281 --> 00:17:08,482 We never were very good at smalltalk, were we, Jim? 395 00:17:08,550 --> 00:17:09,717 - No. - Now, listen-- 396 00:17:09,785 --> 00:17:12,052 You're not getting an interview, Dwight. 397 00:17:12,120 --> 00:17:14,321 The whole point of this search committee process 398 00:17:14,389 --> 00:17:16,490 is to prevent hiring someone like you ever again. 399 00:17:16,558 --> 00:17:17,792 Okay. I know why you're saying that, Jim. 400 00:17:17,859 --> 00:17:20,060 I really do. But think of it this way. 401 00:17:20,128 --> 00:17:22,062 The hand that reaches from the grave 402 00:17:22,130 --> 00:17:23,731 to grip your throat 403 00:17:23,799 --> 00:17:25,566 is the strong hand you want on the wheel. 404 00:17:25,634 --> 00:17:27,568 - Okay. That's vivid. - Now, I'm gonna make you 405 00:17:27,636 --> 00:17:28,969 an offer, okay? 406 00:17:29,037 --> 00:17:32,306 You even do so little as grant me an interview, 407 00:17:32,374 --> 00:17:34,909 I will guarantee you your dream work life, okay? 408 00:17:34,976 --> 00:17:37,444 You roll in at 10:00 AM 409 00:17:37,512 --> 00:17:39,847 to your own private reserved parking spot, 410 00:17:39,915 --> 00:17:42,783 pick up your daily free coffee from Dwight's caffeine corner, 411 00:17:42,851 --> 00:17:45,419 unlimited sex breaks for you and Pam. 412 00:17:45,487 --> 00:17:46,821 - Yikes. - Erin will eat garbage 413 00:17:46,888 --> 00:17:48,255 for your entertainment. 414 00:17:48,323 --> 00:17:50,491 Wow. You know how I like taking bribes. 415 00:17:50,559 --> 00:17:52,026 - Ha ha! - But unfortunately, 416 00:17:52,093 --> 00:17:53,594 jo also took the job away from you 417 00:17:53,662 --> 00:17:55,362 because she doesn't trust your judgment. 418 00:17:55,430 --> 00:17:56,964 So how would that look for me 419 00:17:57,032 --> 00:17:58,866 if I recommended you? 420 00:17:58,934 --> 00:18:00,167 Fine. 421 00:18:00,235 --> 00:18:03,270 I'll do it without you. You'll regret this. 422 00:18:03,338 --> 00:18:04,371 Okay. 423 00:18:05,540 --> 00:18:07,541 Let me get that for you. 424 00:18:07,609 --> 00:18:09,543 - Thank you. - Okay. 425 00:18:15,021 --> 00:18:17,322 Pam, I think Robert is gay. 426 00:18:17,390 --> 00:18:19,924 The senator? 427 00:18:19,992 --> 00:18:22,227 He was married before, and he has a kid. 428 00:18:22,295 --> 00:18:23,461 - So-- - And don't say that thing 429 00:18:23,529 --> 00:18:26,498 about how lots of gay guys have kids. 430 00:18:26,565 --> 00:18:29,434 I have a very strong suspicion. 431 00:18:29,502 --> 00:18:31,269 Did you see him at a bathhouse? 432 00:18:31,337 --> 00:18:32,937 What bathhouse? 433 00:18:33,005 --> 00:18:35,140 The windowless building by the Baskin Robbins. 434 00:18:35,207 --> 00:18:37,075 What? 435 00:18:37,143 --> 00:18:39,277 Forget it. I'm never gonna know what goes on there. 436 00:18:39,345 --> 00:18:40,945 My friend at the Scranton blade 437 00:18:41,013 --> 00:18:42,414 is totally plugged into these matters. 438 00:18:42,481 --> 00:18:44,282 You're in the gay mafia. 439 00:18:44,350 --> 00:18:45,784 You're thinking of another group-- 440 00:18:45,851 --> 00:18:48,787 Much wealthier, much older. You sound ignorant. 441 00:18:48,854 --> 00:18:52,023 You guys, um... Talking senator? 442 00:18:52,091 --> 00:18:54,259 - No. - No. 443 00:18:54,327 --> 00:18:55,960 Why would we be talking about the senator? 444 00:18:56,028 --> 00:18:57,729 'Cause he's totally gay. 445 00:18:58,898 --> 00:19:00,632 How do I know that Robert is gay? 446 00:19:00,700 --> 00:19:03,401 He "liked" my Facebook photos 447 00:19:03,469 --> 00:19:05,370 at 3:00 in the morning. 448 00:19:05,438 --> 00:19:08,340 Name-- David Brent. Occupation-- Inspirer. 449 00:19:08,407 --> 00:19:10,675 Status-- None of your business. 450 00:19:10,743 --> 00:19:12,010 Young, free, and single, though. 451 00:19:12,078 --> 00:19:13,311 Thanks for asking. 452 00:19:13,379 --> 00:19:15,480 Hey, you're looking for a new boss, yeah? 453 00:19:15,548 --> 00:19:17,649 Someone to tell a bunch of discontented, 454 00:19:17,717 --> 00:19:19,951 under-encouraged drones what to do every day. 455 00:19:20,019 --> 00:19:22,787 Is that it? Oh. Our out-of-touch powers that be. 456 00:19:22,855 --> 00:19:25,590 Want me to fire them? They don't see things your way? 457 00:19:25,658 --> 00:19:27,625 Then I am that dude. Bye-bye, baby, bye-bye. 458 00:19:27,693 --> 00:19:29,561 Get some other corporate suit to lay down the law. 459 00:19:29,628 --> 00:19:31,363 What? You've changed your mind? 460 00:19:31,430 --> 00:19:33,398 You're now looking for a leader of men? 461 00:19:33,466 --> 00:19:36,034 Ipso facto...Women too. 462 00:19:36,102 --> 00:19:37,836 When do I start? 463 00:19:39,538 --> 00:19:42,574 Do you know what it took to get Bob to notice me? 464 00:19:42,641 --> 00:19:44,476 I waited in his office every morning 465 00:19:44,543 --> 00:19:46,511 wearing nothing but kitty cat ears. 466 00:19:46,579 --> 00:19:48,646 I did that every day for two weeks. 467 00:19:48,714 --> 00:19:50,014 And on the tenth day, he walked in. 468 00:19:50,082 --> 00:19:52,317 He was naked too, except a dog nose. 469 00:19:52,385 --> 00:19:55,186 - Guess what we did then? - I don't think I can do that-- 470 00:19:55,254 --> 00:19:56,721 - Bestiality. - Yeah. 471 00:19:56,789 --> 00:19:58,423 That's not my personality. 472 00:19:58,491 --> 00:20:01,559 If my daughter were asking me... 473 00:20:01,627 --> 00:20:02,594 Yes? 474 00:20:03,996 --> 00:20:05,764 I would say if you want someone-- 475 00:20:05,831 --> 00:20:09,167 If you really want them-- 476 00:20:09,235 --> 00:20:11,503 Go get them. 477 00:20:11,570 --> 00:20:15,507 I do really want him. 478 00:20:15,574 --> 00:20:17,876 So, uh... Here you go. 479 00:20:17,943 --> 00:20:19,911 - Great. - Hope it's all right. 480 00:20:19,979 --> 00:20:22,080 I'm sure it's fine. 481 00:20:22,148 --> 00:20:23,415 The guy who was in here earlier, 482 00:20:23,482 --> 00:20:25,350 interviewed after me... How'd he do? 483 00:20:25,418 --> 00:20:26,684 Howard cline? 484 00:20:26,752 --> 00:20:28,386 That's not who I'm talking about. 485 00:20:28,454 --> 00:20:31,189 Oh. Deshaun Williams. 486 00:20:31,257 --> 00:20:32,724 Yes. How did he do? 487 00:20:32,792 --> 00:20:35,293 He's an amazing man. He's a rhodes scholar. 488 00:20:35,361 --> 00:20:37,862 He invented an app that invents apps. 489 00:20:37,930 --> 00:20:38,897 Fantastic kisser. 490 00:20:38,964 --> 00:20:40,965 Common, man. I'm being serious. 491 00:20:41,033 --> 00:20:43,268 It's no joke. Darryl, we all know you. 492 00:20:43,335 --> 00:20:46,604 Your interview is not nearly as important as the other guy's. 493 00:20:48,073 --> 00:20:49,574 First I'll take down 494 00:20:49,642 --> 00:20:51,943 - the cubicle walls. - But there aren't-- 495 00:20:52,011 --> 00:20:53,411 Symbol of transparency. 496 00:20:53,479 --> 00:20:55,780 There'd be no titles. 497 00:20:55,848 --> 00:20:58,116 Everyone has the same job. 498 00:20:58,184 --> 00:20:59,918 Same goes for me. 499 00:20:59,985 --> 00:21:03,421 I'd take your job, but I'd reject the title. 500 00:21:03,489 --> 00:21:04,556 A little unspecific. 501 00:21:04,623 --> 00:21:06,424 Everyone would be known 502 00:21:06,492 --> 00:21:08,426 for their accomplishments. 503 00:21:08,494 --> 00:21:10,428 That's very interesting. 504 00:21:10,496 --> 00:21:12,530 Um...I feel like there might be a conflict there, 505 00:21:12,598 --> 00:21:15,633 and if a conflict did arise, how would that be dealt with? 506 00:21:15,701 --> 00:21:18,803 Oh! Yeah. 507 00:21:19,905 --> 00:21:21,272 Scratch everything from before. 508 00:21:21,340 --> 00:21:23,308 I tell you what I'd do. Go the other way. 509 00:21:23,375 --> 00:21:25,643 More cubicles. 510 00:21:25,711 --> 00:21:27,245 More division. 511 00:21:27,313 --> 00:21:31,149 Everyone is somebody's boss, 512 00:21:31,217 --> 00:21:34,819 and that person can fire the person below them. 513 00:21:36,555 --> 00:21:39,257 And once a month the lowest-performing person-- 514 00:21:40,860 --> 00:21:42,227 Bye-bye. 515 00:21:42,294 --> 00:21:44,896 How would you compare like an accountant and HR? 516 00:21:44,964 --> 00:21:47,632 Well, I'll tell you how, shall I? 517 00:21:47,700 --> 00:21:48,800 I'll tell you how. Okay. 518 00:21:48,868 --> 00:21:51,436 By splitting the difference. 519 00:21:51,504 --> 00:21:54,439 Just--just somewhere in the middle. 520 00:21:54,507 --> 00:21:55,874 I think that's probably all... 521 00:21:55,941 --> 00:21:56,941 We need to hear from-- 522 00:21:57,009 --> 00:21:58,409 Zen office. 523 00:22:00,012 --> 00:22:01,913 Thought of that? That's what I'd do. 524 00:22:01,981 --> 00:22:05,884 Everyone takes their shoes off before they come in, okay? 525 00:22:05,951 --> 00:22:09,053 There'd be no desks. You just sit on the floor. 526 00:22:09,121 --> 00:22:11,923 - That's very-- - You've got a thai woman 527 00:22:11,991 --> 00:22:14,392 out in the back-- Sockee. 528 00:22:14,460 --> 00:22:16,060 - Okay. - Sockee. 529 00:22:16,128 --> 00:22:18,930 - That's not-- - Sockee is her name, okay? 530 00:22:18,998 --> 00:22:22,433 She's administering massage, all right, if you need it. 531 00:22:22,501 --> 00:22:24,102 If you don't, whatever. Just talk to her. 532 00:22:24,169 --> 00:22:25,737 She's a person. 533 00:22:25,804 --> 00:22:27,772 Either way, 50 minutes of that, 534 00:22:27,840 --> 00:22:29,507 and you... 535 00:22:29,575 --> 00:22:32,243 You are cracking to go. 536 00:22:35,147 --> 00:22:36,781 - Is there a frontrunner? - You know what? 537 00:22:36,849 --> 00:22:39,050 They all just sort of blend together after a while. 538 00:22:39,118 --> 00:22:40,785 Well, there must be someone who stands out. 539 00:22:40,853 --> 00:22:42,053 No, not at all. 540 00:22:42,121 --> 00:22:43,755 In fact, I'm not even taking it seriously. 541 00:22:43,822 --> 00:22:45,056 I think at the end of the day, 542 00:22:45,124 --> 00:22:47,458 I'm just gonna pick a name out of the hat. 543 00:22:47,526 --> 00:22:49,193 The hell you will! 544 00:22:49,261 --> 00:22:51,663 I worked for the last boss for 15 years. 545 00:22:51,730 --> 00:22:54,299 According to my doctor, I don't have another 15 years 546 00:22:54,366 --> 00:22:57,068 if I wanna keep up the same dietary and sexual lifestyle, 547 00:22:57,136 --> 00:22:58,736 which I intend to. 548 00:22:58,804 --> 00:23:01,506 Oh, no, Stanley. You'll live forever. 549 00:23:01,574 --> 00:23:03,074 My next boss will be my last boss. 550 00:23:03,142 --> 00:23:04,776 He'll be at my funeral. 551 00:23:04,843 --> 00:23:08,279 So I would appreciate it if you would take this seriously. 552 00:23:09,982 --> 00:23:11,416 You pick a crappy boss, 553 00:23:11,483 --> 00:23:13,418 you're responsible for my crappy life. 554 00:23:13,485 --> 00:23:15,687 Okay, everybody. I was just making a joke. 555 00:23:15,754 --> 00:23:17,555 I am taking it seriously. I promise. 556 00:23:17,623 --> 00:23:20,358 Are you? 557 00:23:20,426 --> 00:23:21,693 Little advice? 558 00:23:21,760 --> 00:23:24,228 Take a day off from the whole Jim shtick. 559 00:23:24,296 --> 00:23:26,431 Try caring about something. 560 00:23:26,498 --> 00:23:30,101 You might like how it feels, James. 561 00:23:38,696 --> 00:23:40,697 Hey, honey. Oh, lord. Take all this. 562 00:23:40,764 --> 00:23:43,299 - All right. - Here. 563 00:23:43,367 --> 00:23:45,468 - Oh. - Jim. 564 00:23:45,536 --> 00:23:47,237 Did you hear stern this morning? 565 00:23:47,304 --> 00:23:49,239 - No. Was he good? - Ah...Robin was good. 566 00:23:49,306 --> 00:23:51,140 She's always good. Keeps him on his toes. 567 00:23:51,208 --> 00:23:53,276 It's Howard's show, though. 568 00:23:53,344 --> 00:23:54,944 Whose is this? 569 00:23:55,012 --> 00:23:56,379 Darryl Philbin. 570 00:23:56,447 --> 00:23:59,582 Oh. Very nice to see a familiar face on top. 571 00:23:59,650 --> 00:24:03,219 Ah, a little long, aren't we? Four pages? 572 00:24:03,287 --> 00:24:04,754 Is this the same Darryl Philbin 573 00:24:04,822 --> 00:24:07,657 who's had two jobs in ten years at one company? 574 00:24:07,725 --> 00:24:11,227 Yes, thanks to you who promoted me 575 00:24:11,295 --> 00:24:13,796 after we, uh...lnterfaced. 576 00:24:13,864 --> 00:24:16,165 "Coordinated and implemented receipt, storage, 577 00:24:16,233 --> 00:24:20,670 and delivery of over 2.5 billion units of inventory." 578 00:24:20,738 --> 00:24:22,472 2.5 billion, Darryl? 579 00:24:22,539 --> 00:24:24,841 2.5 billion units of what? 580 00:24:24,909 --> 00:24:27,610 Paper material, ma'am. 581 00:24:27,678 --> 00:24:29,112 Paper material? 582 00:24:29,179 --> 00:24:31,614 Pieces of paper. 583 00:24:31,682 --> 00:24:34,417 Jo. May I speak to you for a second? 584 00:24:34,485 --> 00:24:36,119 Or what? You gonna shoot me? 585 00:24:36,186 --> 00:24:38,621 Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha... 586 00:24:38,689 --> 00:24:40,690 Oh, I enjoy laughing at my mistakes. 587 00:24:40,758 --> 00:24:43,559 Because I've learned so much from them. 588 00:24:43,627 --> 00:24:45,495 I'd like to be interviewed for the position. 589 00:24:45,562 --> 00:24:46,930 I'll interview you right now. 590 00:24:46,997 --> 00:24:48,765 - Okay. - Question one. 591 00:24:48,832 --> 00:24:51,134 Ever shot a gun in the office? 592 00:24:51,201 --> 00:24:52,435 It's complicated... 593 00:24:52,503 --> 00:24:55,004 Yeah, but see...lt's not. 594 00:24:56,240 --> 00:24:57,707 I don't think we should tell her. 595 00:24:57,775 --> 00:24:59,175 Angela went a whole day without telling me 596 00:24:59,243 --> 00:25:00,977 I had lettuce in my teeth. Screw her. 597 00:25:01,045 --> 00:25:02,645 I'm a woman. I would want to know. 598 00:25:02,713 --> 00:25:04,180 Yeah. You gotta know. 599 00:25:04,248 --> 00:25:08,117 Okay. But if Angela can get a gay man to marry her, 600 00:25:08,185 --> 00:25:11,187 maybe I could get a lesbian to marry me. Huh? 601 00:25:11,255 --> 00:25:13,323 Huh? Huh? That's hot. 602 00:25:13,390 --> 00:25:15,525 You have met a lesbian in real life, right? 603 00:25:15,592 --> 00:25:20,530 You know, this probably is her last chance at a family. 604 00:25:20,597 --> 00:25:22,532 She does seem happy. 605 00:25:22,599 --> 00:25:24,534 You're right. You're right. 606 00:25:24,601 --> 00:25:26,536 She seems happy. We don't tell her. 607 00:25:26,603 --> 00:25:28,237 - We don't tell her. - Okay. 608 00:25:28,305 --> 00:25:30,173 Excuse me, Ms. Bennett, may I have a word? 609 00:25:30,240 --> 00:25:31,240 Okay. 610 00:25:31,308 --> 00:25:32,642 Uh...Can it be in private? 611 00:25:32,710 --> 00:25:34,477 Don't worry. It's not about you. 612 00:25:38,415 --> 00:25:39,882 As minority executive, 613 00:25:39,950 --> 00:25:41,451 I think it's my responsibility to let you know 614 00:25:41,518 --> 00:25:42,652 that Gabe is gross. 615 00:25:42,720 --> 00:25:43,886 I don't think it's professional 616 00:25:43,954 --> 00:25:45,722 that he was sleeping with the receptionist, 617 00:25:45,789 --> 00:25:47,724 and then when Erin dumped him so that she could be with Andy, 618 00:25:47,791 --> 00:25:50,660 he became a total crazy stalker psycho. 619 00:25:50,728 --> 00:25:52,195 Welcome to Scranton, Jo, 620 00:25:52,262 --> 00:25:54,564 land of a thousand problems only you can fix. 621 00:25:57,101 --> 00:25:59,902 Oh, for God's sake. 622 00:26:02,072 --> 00:26:05,408 He's texting me his resume one line at a time. 623 00:26:06,777 --> 00:26:10,079 These are costing me 10¢ apiece, you jackass. 624 00:26:10,147 --> 00:26:11,581 I'm roaming! 625 00:26:14,118 --> 00:26:15,918 Get me our biggest client on the phone 626 00:26:15,986 --> 00:26:17,520 right this instant. 627 00:26:22,359 --> 00:26:23,926 Who is our biggest client? 628 00:26:23,994 --> 00:26:25,228 Uh, just put him through to me. 629 00:26:25,295 --> 00:26:27,597 Okay. 630 00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:31,768 Hello, this is... The client. 631 00:26:31,835 --> 00:26:33,002 It's Creed. 632 00:26:33,070 --> 00:26:36,939 Fyi. I'm starting my own paper company. 633 00:26:37,007 --> 00:26:39,642 Looking to poach some chumps. You in? 634 00:26:39,710 --> 00:26:42,145 - Yes. - Cool! 635 00:26:42,212 --> 00:26:44,280 Let's keep this on the qt, okay? 636 00:26:44,348 --> 00:26:47,150 I, uh, don't want you to be a dead mammajamma. 637 00:26:47,217 --> 00:26:48,384 - Great. - All right, thank you. 638 00:26:48,452 --> 00:26:50,319 - Thank you. Bye-bye. 639 00:26:51,655 --> 00:26:53,122 Jo, you have one more candidate. 640 00:26:53,190 --> 00:26:54,424 He's a burn victim. 641 00:26:55,492 --> 00:26:57,060 He's all messed up. 642 00:26:57,127 --> 00:26:59,629 I can tell him to get lost if you want. 643 00:26:59,696 --> 00:27:01,798 No. Send him in. 644 00:27:01,865 --> 00:27:03,099 Who is this? 645 00:27:04,835 --> 00:27:07,170 - I have no idea. - Oh, I know this guy. 646 00:27:16,013 --> 00:27:18,581 Hello, Mr. Souvenier. 647 00:27:18,649 --> 00:27:20,650 Mr. Jacques Souvenier? 648 00:27:20,717 --> 00:27:22,418 Nice to meet you. It says here you're French? 649 00:27:22,486 --> 00:27:24,754 So you worked at your last job for 15 years 650 00:27:24,822 --> 00:27:26,622 as assistant to the regional manager. 651 00:27:26,690 --> 00:27:27,890 Assistant regional manager. 652 00:27:27,958 --> 00:27:29,158 Assistant to the regional manager. 653 00:27:29,226 --> 00:27:32,095 - Assistant regional manager. - What is it? 654 00:27:32,162 --> 00:27:33,463 Assistant regional manager. 655 00:27:33,530 --> 00:27:34,797 Oh. That's my mistake. Sorry about that. 656 00:27:34,865 --> 00:27:36,032 The last paper company you worked for 657 00:27:36,100 --> 00:27:37,500 burned to the ground? 658 00:27:37,568 --> 00:27:39,368 "All because they wouldn't hire a manager 659 00:27:39,436 --> 00:27:40,636 who lived and breathed paper." 660 00:27:40,704 --> 00:27:42,138 That's a travesty. 661 00:27:42,206 --> 00:27:44,507 I wanna talk to Dwight Schrute for a second. 662 00:27:44,575 --> 00:27:46,142 I wanna ask him a question. 663 00:27:46,210 --> 00:27:47,310 Get Dwight. 664 00:27:47,377 --> 00:27:49,278 If he isn't here in 60 seconds... 665 00:27:51,181 --> 00:27:53,149 Wait, wait! No. Stop, stop. 666 00:27:53,217 --> 00:27:55,451 Jo... 667 00:27:55,519 --> 00:27:57,620 It's me. I'm Dwight. 668 00:27:58,889 --> 00:28:00,389 No. 669 00:28:00,457 --> 00:28:01,691 No. Wait. But-- 670 00:28:01,758 --> 00:28:04,360 I mean, you're Dwight and then... 671 00:28:04,428 --> 00:28:05,628 He's the-- 672 00:28:05,696 --> 00:28:07,029 Yeah. 673 00:28:08,765 --> 00:28:11,367 Very unprofessional, Jacques. 674 00:28:11,435 --> 00:28:13,836 Or should I say Dwight? 675 00:28:13,904 --> 00:28:16,873 Let's just say I had hired this Jack Souvenier. 676 00:28:16,940 --> 00:28:18,141 Then what? 677 00:28:18,208 --> 00:28:19,742 I would have dressed this way every day, 678 00:28:19,810 --> 00:28:22,545 legally changed my name, learned French sign language, 679 00:28:22,613 --> 00:28:25,081 shown up, and been the best damn branch manager 680 00:28:25,149 --> 00:28:26,482 you'd ever seen. 681 00:28:26,550 --> 00:28:28,184 All that for this job. 682 00:28:28,252 --> 00:28:29,752 Yes. 683 00:28:31,054 --> 00:28:32,922 That's [Bleep] Crazy. 684 00:28:34,458 --> 00:28:35,625 Get outta here. 685 00:28:38,896 --> 00:28:41,397 What a nut job. 686 00:28:45,151 --> 00:28:46,451 This guy was good, although he did keep saying 687 00:28:46,519 --> 00:28:48,420 that he needed two weeks off right at the beginning 688 00:28:48,487 --> 00:28:49,788 for a trip to the Finger Lakes. 689 00:28:49,855 --> 00:28:51,589 Seriously, every five minutes he was like, 690 00:28:51,657 --> 00:28:53,458 "hey, just making sure the Finger Lakes thing is clear." 691 00:28:53,526 --> 00:28:55,460 Okay. It's fun to talk about the rejects, 692 00:28:55,528 --> 00:28:57,262 but, uh... Who's got ya excited? 693 00:28:57,329 --> 00:28:58,730 Finger Lakes guy is good. 694 00:28:58,798 --> 00:29:01,099 Darryl is also very good. 695 00:29:01,167 --> 00:29:04,502 Who's this fellow? Went to Cornell. 696 00:29:04,570 --> 00:29:07,172 What's wrong with him? How much time do you have? 697 00:29:07,239 --> 00:29:08,807 Sales ability--none. 698 00:29:08,874 --> 00:29:11,676 See sales ability. 699 00:29:11,744 --> 00:29:13,311 And that's your unbiased opinion. 700 00:29:13,379 --> 00:29:14,846 - Yes, it is. - So it's not relevant 701 00:29:14,914 --> 00:29:18,016 that he took the receptionist away from ya. 702 00:29:18,084 --> 00:29:20,485 Aw, Jo. Jo, I'm disappointed in you. 703 00:29:20,553 --> 00:29:23,254 Some people let personal things into the work-- 704 00:29:23,322 --> 00:29:25,223 is she with him? Because I-I thought that-- 705 00:29:25,291 --> 00:29:27,659 - Gabe! Ohh! 706 00:29:27,726 --> 00:29:29,127 You got all close to these people, 707 00:29:29,195 --> 00:29:31,429 got involved in their lives. 708 00:29:31,497 --> 00:29:32,664 Let's get ya back to Florida. 709 00:29:32,731 --> 00:29:34,632 We'll figure out something for ya. 710 00:29:34,700 --> 00:29:36,067 That sounds like a promotion. 711 00:29:36,135 --> 00:29:38,002 It's not. 712 00:29:38,070 --> 00:29:39,737 Let's get Kelly in here to take his place. 713 00:29:39,805 --> 00:29:41,306 Um...Why Kelly? 714 00:29:41,373 --> 00:29:43,475 'Cause Gabe's tall and weak. She's short and strong. 715 00:29:43,542 --> 00:29:45,243 I'm doing an opposites thing. 716 00:29:45,311 --> 00:29:46,644 Okay. 717 00:29:46,712 --> 00:29:48,079 How'd my girl Nelly do? 718 00:29:48,147 --> 00:29:49,681 Oh. I didn't know you knew her. 719 00:29:49,748 --> 00:29:51,816 - She didn't mention it? - No. 720 00:29:51,884 --> 00:29:54,285 Integrity move. I like it. 721 00:29:54,353 --> 00:29:56,187 Yeah, uh, she also gave me reason to think 722 00:29:56,255 --> 00:29:58,189 that maybe she wasn't a good fit. 723 00:29:58,257 --> 00:29:59,858 Well, I'm not saying you must hire her. 724 00:29:59,925 --> 00:30:03,128 If you find someone who's clearly a fit, then fine. 725 00:30:03,195 --> 00:30:05,463 Just make sure they fit real good. 726 00:30:05,531 --> 00:30:08,333 No more manager turnover. Don't mess this up, Jim. 727 00:30:09,869 --> 00:30:11,469 And give Dwight an interview. 728 00:30:11,537 --> 00:30:13,972 I like a little bit of crazy. 729 00:30:16,942 --> 00:30:19,344 - Ah! - Erin, what are you doing? 730 00:30:19,411 --> 00:30:21,479 I've been turned into a puppet. 731 00:30:21,547 --> 00:30:23,615 Okay. 732 00:30:23,682 --> 00:30:25,517 Look at the puppet. Hi, puppet. 733 00:30:25,584 --> 00:30:26,951 Who are you? 734 00:30:27,019 --> 00:30:29,020 I went to drop off the FedEx forms, 735 00:30:29,088 --> 00:30:33,324 and an evil witch named Angela turned me into a puppet! 736 00:30:33,392 --> 00:30:35,193 Yeah. 737 00:30:35,261 --> 00:30:37,028 Low blow, puppet. 738 00:30:37,096 --> 00:30:39,397 And there's only one thing that can change me back 739 00:30:39,465 --> 00:30:41,699 into a real girl. 740 00:30:43,202 --> 00:30:44,269 It's good. 741 00:30:44,336 --> 00:30:45,837 It's just that I wish the puppet 742 00:30:45,905 --> 00:30:48,106 would talk more about the alphabet. 743 00:30:48,174 --> 00:30:50,542 Not for me, but... 744 00:30:50,609 --> 00:30:52,544 If any kids are watching. 745 00:30:52,611 --> 00:30:56,481 A, b, and so forth. 746 00:30:56,549 --> 00:30:58,249 You know. 747 00:30:58,317 --> 00:31:02,387 M, N, L, O. P. 748 00:31:02,454 --> 00:31:05,657 F. 749 00:31:05,724 --> 00:31:08,726 I need the most special thing in the office. 750 00:31:08,794 --> 00:31:10,061 Silence? 751 00:31:10,129 --> 00:31:13,231 A date with the best salesman... 752 00:31:13,299 --> 00:31:15,200 Andy Bernard! 753 00:31:24,076 --> 00:31:27,212 Hey, Erin. Oh. 754 00:31:27,279 --> 00:31:28,913 Where'd you learn how to puppet like that? 755 00:31:28,981 --> 00:31:31,115 - I've done it all my life-- - Listen, I'm really flattered, 756 00:31:31,183 --> 00:31:33,051 but I don't think we should. 757 00:31:39,325 --> 00:31:41,359 Erin's my best friend in this office, 758 00:31:41,427 --> 00:31:43,628 hands down. 759 00:31:43,696 --> 00:31:44,829 But... 760 00:31:44,897 --> 00:31:46,097 When she asked me out, 761 00:31:46,165 --> 00:31:48,433 I just didn't have that feeling, you know? 762 00:31:48,500 --> 00:31:50,501 Aren't there some things that you really want to like 763 00:31:50,569 --> 00:31:53,605 but you just can't seem to like it? 764 00:31:53,672 --> 00:31:57,408 Like madmen or football. 765 00:31:57,476 --> 00:31:59,577 Let's not forget. Erin chose Gabe over me. 766 00:31:59,645 --> 00:32:01,879 That happened. 767 00:32:01,947 --> 00:32:06,417 I'm not gonna apologize for getting over her...Okay? 768 00:32:06,485 --> 00:32:08,353 I'm sorry. 769 00:32:08,420 --> 00:32:12,824 I would go for someone who's more... 770 00:32:12,891 --> 00:32:15,760 She's great, though. 771 00:32:15,828 --> 00:32:17,862 Stanley, I won't be able to invite 772 00:32:17,930 --> 00:32:19,530 everyone to the wedding, 773 00:32:19,598 --> 00:32:21,599 because we wanna keep it to 350. 774 00:32:21,667 --> 00:32:23,401 - I'll get over it. - I mean, 775 00:32:23,469 --> 00:32:25,069 we just have to see how many senators 776 00:32:25,137 --> 00:32:26,871 and members of congress want to attend 777 00:32:26,939 --> 00:32:30,341 before we can open it up to regular people. 778 00:32:30,409 --> 00:32:33,344 Pam, you know how you and Jim did your ironic wedding? 779 00:32:33,412 --> 00:32:34,879 Do you still have the plans 780 00:32:34,947 --> 00:32:36,547 for the dream wedding that you couldn't afford? 781 00:32:36,615 --> 00:32:38,416 That was our dream wedding. 782 00:32:38,484 --> 00:32:41,119 Niagara falls? 783 00:32:41,186 --> 00:32:44,255 Pregnant? That was your dream? 784 00:32:44,323 --> 00:32:46,457 Pork medallions? 785 00:32:47,993 --> 00:32:50,194 I hope... 786 00:32:50,262 --> 00:32:53,131 You have a very beautiful wedding, Angela. 787 00:32:55,134 --> 00:32:57,135 All right. 788 00:32:57,202 --> 00:32:58,903 Name. Dwight Schrute. 789 00:32:58,971 --> 00:33:01,072 Thank you, Mr. Scnoot. We will let you know. 790 00:33:01,140 --> 00:33:02,907 - You have to interview me. - I just did. 791 00:33:02,975 --> 00:33:04,275 The answer to that one question 792 00:33:04,343 --> 00:33:05,610 told me everything I need to know. 793 00:33:05,678 --> 00:33:06,878 I demand more questions! 794 00:33:06,945 --> 00:33:08,212 All right, guys. Good day. 795 00:33:08,280 --> 00:33:09,714 A lot of candidates. Let's discuss. 796 00:33:09,782 --> 00:33:11,449 Okay. If you're not gonna interview me, 797 00:33:11,517 --> 00:33:12,950 then I'll do it. Yes. 798 00:33:14,286 --> 00:33:15,753 What will be your first priority? 799 00:33:15,821 --> 00:33:19,324 I will have seven first priorities. 800 00:33:19,391 --> 00:33:21,626 Safety, profits, 801 00:33:21,694 --> 00:33:24,062 fostering a community of self-reliance 802 00:33:24,129 --> 00:33:25,763 and entrepreneurship, 803 00:33:25,831 --> 00:33:26,764 listening, 804 00:33:26,832 --> 00:33:29,133 respect for human life, 805 00:33:29,201 --> 00:33:30,635 bolstering our public image, 806 00:33:30,703 --> 00:33:34,906 and... Getting everyone home on time. 807 00:33:34,973 --> 00:33:36,307 Dwight, let me be Frank. 808 00:33:36,375 --> 00:33:38,409 In an accident that no one can blame you for, 809 00:33:38,477 --> 00:33:41,579 an antique gun was discharged while you were acting manager. 810 00:33:41,647 --> 00:33:44,482 How are we ever to trust you again? 811 00:33:47,486 --> 00:33:49,454 That's a great question. 812 00:33:49,521 --> 00:33:51,723 I am going to institute 813 00:33:51,790 --> 00:33:55,259 a strict no firearms policy for this office 814 00:33:55,327 --> 00:33:58,029 that extends to myself as well. 815 00:33:58,097 --> 00:34:01,366 Wow. All of my concerns are disappearing. 816 00:34:01,433 --> 00:34:03,301 - Thank you, Dwight. - Thank you. 817 00:34:07,406 --> 00:34:09,974 You'll be hearing from us shortly, Mr. Schrute, 818 00:34:10,042 --> 00:34:11,976 and I think you're going to like the call 819 00:34:12,044 --> 00:34:13,878 you're going to receive. 820 00:34:13,946 --> 00:34:16,881 Oh, come on. 821 00:34:16,949 --> 00:34:19,851 I'm just happy that I got this meeting. 822 00:34:23,922 --> 00:34:25,056 Well, that was quick. 823 00:34:25,124 --> 00:34:27,892 Very, very interesting. 824 00:34:27,960 --> 00:34:31,129 And you know what? I'm impressed. 825 00:34:31,196 --> 00:34:33,498 - He's not a real candidate. - I don't know, Jim, 826 00:34:33,565 --> 00:34:34,899 'cause it makes me think about something 827 00:34:34,967 --> 00:34:36,367 that my grandfather used to say, which is that 828 00:34:36,435 --> 00:34:39,003 sometimes the hand that jumps out of the grave 829 00:34:39,071 --> 00:34:40,505 and grabs you around the throat, 830 00:34:40,572 --> 00:34:42,974 that is the hand that you want on the wheel. 831 00:34:43,041 --> 00:34:45,076 - You took the deal. - Yeah. It was a great deal. 832 00:34:45,144 --> 00:34:46,711 - That's not okay. - I don't know. 833 00:34:46,779 --> 00:34:48,713 Dwight seems like a great leader to me, 834 00:34:48,781 --> 00:34:50,381 and I look forward to the personal perks 835 00:34:50,449 --> 00:34:51,849 that he promised me privately. 836 00:34:51,917 --> 00:34:53,184 What do you think, Toby? 837 00:34:53,252 --> 00:34:55,253 Well, we could try him out for a little while. 838 00:34:55,320 --> 00:34:57,488 If it doesn't work out, you know, 839 00:34:57,556 --> 00:35:00,057 maybe one of us could, you know, step in... 840 00:35:00,125 --> 00:35:02,427 What is happening right now? 841 00:35:04,762 --> 00:35:06,778 Is it true that you're making Dwight the manager? 842 00:35:06,883 --> 00:35:08,317 No. Why would you think that? 843 00:35:08,385 --> 00:35:10,319 Well, he and Kelly said, then they pre-fired me. 844 00:35:10,387 --> 00:35:11,387 Okay. 845 00:35:13,757 --> 00:35:15,558 Okay, guys, just so you all know, 846 00:35:15,625 --> 00:35:17,493 no decision has been made. 847 00:35:17,561 --> 00:35:19,328 And Dwight is definitely not the boss. 848 00:35:19,396 --> 00:35:20,396 That is correct. 849 00:35:20,464 --> 00:35:22,398 Actually, Dwight is not the manager yet. 850 00:35:22,466 --> 00:35:24,767 No, no, no, not-- Not ever, 'cause that's not gonna happen. 851 00:35:24,835 --> 00:35:26,869 Well, it's not entirely up to you, is it? 852 00:35:26,937 --> 00:35:29,538 Seems to me like someone is getting a little power mad. 853 00:35:29,606 --> 00:35:30,773 Am I the only one who remembers 854 00:35:30,841 --> 00:35:32,174 what he did when he was in charge? 855 00:35:32,242 --> 00:35:34,410 I feel like I'm going a little bit crazy. 856 00:35:34,478 --> 00:35:35,878 Tuna... You're completely sane. 857 00:35:35,946 --> 00:35:38,381 - Thank you. - Who do you like for the job? 858 00:35:38,448 --> 00:35:40,282 Is there anyone who maybe 859 00:35:40,350 --> 00:35:41,951 was a little underwhelming at first 860 00:35:42,018 --> 00:35:43,652 but now seems like a safe... 861 00:35:43,720 --> 00:35:46,689 If not slightly unexciting choice? 862 00:35:46,757 --> 00:35:50,226 Okay. It seems like everybody has an opinion, so who else? 863 00:35:50,293 --> 00:35:51,927 Anybody? Do you mean it? 864 00:35:51,995 --> 00:35:53,796 Anybody? Are you sure? 865 00:35:53,864 --> 00:35:55,631 I suppose I am. 866 00:35:55,699 --> 00:35:59,201 Okay. Well, what do I want in a manager? 867 00:35:59,269 --> 00:36:01,704 Let me see. 868 00:36:01,772 --> 00:36:05,141 What do I want? 869 00:36:05,208 --> 00:36:07,243 I don't think he meant-- 870 00:36:07,310 --> 00:36:09,612 So now anyone gets to talk at any time? 871 00:36:09,679 --> 00:36:11,247 Go ahead. 872 00:36:11,314 --> 00:36:14,383 What do I want? 873 00:36:16,219 --> 00:36:18,621 I'm looking for someone 874 00:36:18,688 --> 00:36:19,955 who... 875 00:36:21,625 --> 00:36:23,926 Everyone is listening to me. 876 00:36:25,228 --> 00:36:26,262 - Can I say-- - Yes. 877 00:36:26,329 --> 00:36:27,830 I think it should be Darryl. 878 00:36:27,898 --> 00:36:29,398 - Okay. - What a surprise. 879 00:36:29,466 --> 00:36:31,934 Minorities sticking together. Kelly's on your side. 880 00:36:32,002 --> 00:36:34,637 I'm sorry, is that all you think of me-- A minority? 881 00:36:34,704 --> 00:36:36,739 I am so much more than that. 882 00:36:36,807 --> 00:36:38,507 I am a dancer. I'm a singer. 883 00:36:38,575 --> 00:36:39,942 I'm a fashion designer. 884 00:36:40,010 --> 00:36:42,878 Whoever it is, I think they should be lame. 885 00:36:42,946 --> 00:36:46,649 Kind of a nonthreatening, moderate personality. 886 00:36:46,716 --> 00:36:48,050 - I want an outsider. - Perfect. 887 00:36:48,118 --> 00:36:51,520 There are several outside candidates that we think-- 888 00:36:51,588 --> 00:36:52,855 No, I mean an outsider. 889 00:36:52,923 --> 00:36:54,690 Like someone on the margins of society 890 00:36:54,758 --> 00:36:57,059 who doesn't see things the way we do, 891 00:36:57,127 --> 00:36:58,661 like a homeless person. A homeless person. 892 00:36:58,728 --> 00:37:01,330 Really? A homeless person. 893 00:37:01,398 --> 00:37:02,832 No. You're right, Pam. 894 00:37:02,899 --> 00:37:04,300 Let's just leave them to the welfare system 895 00:37:04,367 --> 00:37:06,202 and let that handle it. No, I want you to say 896 00:37:06,269 --> 00:37:08,838 that you think the best person to be our new manager 897 00:37:08,905 --> 00:37:10,172 is a homeless person. 898 00:37:10,240 --> 00:37:12,007 Let me guess who you want, Pam. 899 00:37:12,075 --> 00:37:13,742 Rachael ray? The ladies of the view? 900 00:37:13,810 --> 00:37:18,214 I got away with everything under the last boss, 901 00:37:18,281 --> 00:37:20,182 and it wasn't good for me at all. 902 00:37:20,250 --> 00:37:23,853 So I want guidance. I want leadership. 903 00:37:23,920 --> 00:37:26,856 But don't just like boss me around, you know? 904 00:37:26,923 --> 00:37:28,491 Like lead me. 905 00:37:28,558 --> 00:37:31,827 Lead me... When I'm in the mood 906 00:37:31,895 --> 00:37:33,529 to be led. 907 00:37:33,597 --> 00:37:35,030 I just want for once 908 00:37:35,098 --> 00:37:37,566 a small, professional, decisive, 909 00:37:37,634 --> 00:37:39,535 well-hung man in his 40s. 910 00:37:39,603 --> 00:37:41,237 - Hey, hey, hey! - Okay, fine. 911 00:37:41,304 --> 00:37:43,472 Uh, the guy with a tiny penis. 912 00:37:43,540 --> 00:37:47,142 Are you happy? Let's hire that guy! 913 00:37:47,210 --> 00:37:48,644 She may have a point there. 914 00:37:48,712 --> 00:37:51,547 Would a small penis work? 915 00:37:51,615 --> 00:37:53,482 Small to moderate. 916 00:37:53,550 --> 00:37:54,817 Gotta catch a plane. 917 00:37:54,885 --> 00:37:56,585 Oh, hey, Gabe, I'm sorry. 918 00:37:56,653 --> 00:37:58,220 We didn't get you a cake or anything. 919 00:37:58,288 --> 00:37:59,655 We're gonna miss you. 920 00:37:59,723 --> 00:38:02,558 Oh, well, I'm still the corporate liaison to the branch. 921 00:38:02,626 --> 00:38:04,994 You are not leaving without giving me a hug. 922 00:38:06,296 --> 00:38:08,063 Ugh! Okay, you know what? 923 00:38:08,131 --> 00:38:09,398 You don't need to make that sound. 924 00:38:09,466 --> 00:38:10,799 I'm sorry. You were just a lot bonier 925 00:38:10,867 --> 00:38:12,167 than I thought you were gonna be! 926 00:38:12,235 --> 00:38:14,036 There are plenty of people who love touching me. 927 00:38:14,104 --> 00:38:15,538 I'm a terrific hugger. 928 00:38:15,605 --> 00:38:17,039 I've been with a bunch of girls 929 00:38:17,107 --> 00:38:19,575 where that's basically all they wanna do. 930 00:38:19,643 --> 00:38:21,677 I will see you all soon. Later, man. 931 00:38:21,745 --> 00:38:23,245 - Good luck. - We'll miss you. 932 00:38:23,313 --> 00:38:24,747 Good luck at your new job. 933 00:38:24,814 --> 00:38:26,282 Uh, listen up. 934 00:38:26,349 --> 00:38:28,083 Listen up, ladies. 935 00:38:28,151 --> 00:38:30,586 I want the job. 936 00:38:30,654 --> 00:38:32,521 There. I said it. 937 00:38:32,589 --> 00:38:34,490 I'm educated. I'm capable. 938 00:38:34,558 --> 00:38:39,528 I like all of you, and I won't make any changes. 939 00:38:39,596 --> 00:38:41,363 I see it. 940 00:38:41,431 --> 00:38:44,233 I see it like I see a Mountain that I'm standing in front of 941 00:38:44,301 --> 00:38:46,268 and facing and I'm liking. 942 00:38:46,336 --> 00:38:47,670 Yeah. 943 00:38:47,737 --> 00:38:49,905 Andy would be wonderful as boss. 944 00:38:49,973 --> 00:38:52,241 Erin made a good point. 945 00:38:52,309 --> 00:38:56,045 No. We're not related. I got the call. 946 00:38:56,112 --> 00:38:59,515 But... I'll tell her some other day. 947 00:38:59,583 --> 00:39:01,250 What about Darryl? 948 00:39:01,318 --> 00:39:04,286 We can all agree that he's a stand-up guy, right? 949 00:39:04,354 --> 00:39:06,388 Well, let me be clear. I only speak for myself 950 00:39:06,456 --> 00:39:08,791 and not myself and the senator. 951 00:39:08,858 --> 00:39:10,893 I think we have some wonderful candidates, 952 00:39:10,961 --> 00:39:13,262 and there is a great lively debate here. 953 00:39:13,330 --> 00:39:15,397 But let's think about-- - No. No. 954 00:39:15,465 --> 00:39:18,067 No. Sorry. We cut Kevin off for the same thing. 955 00:39:18,134 --> 00:39:20,102 You have to have something to say if you talk. 956 00:39:20,170 --> 00:39:22,104 Exactly. 957 00:39:22,172 --> 00:39:24,106 Jada. No, no, no. Jada, what are you do-- 958 00:39:24,174 --> 00:39:26,208 Oh. So sorry, guys. 959 00:39:26,276 --> 00:39:28,811 I hope my family didn't disrupt your meeting. 960 00:39:28,878 --> 00:39:31,614 Daddy, are these the people who are making you manager? 961 00:39:31,681 --> 00:39:34,883 Maybe, sweetheart. 962 00:39:34,951 --> 00:39:36,986 Single dad. Challenges. 963 00:39:37,053 --> 00:39:39,955 I don't know if he'd be a good manager, 964 00:39:40,023 --> 00:39:41,457 but he's a really great dad. 965 00:39:41,524 --> 00:39:43,292 Okay. Shush. This was a mistake. 966 00:39:43,360 --> 00:39:44,560 Let's go. 967 00:39:44,628 --> 00:39:47,129 It seems like we all know enough to vote. 968 00:39:47,197 --> 00:39:49,598 Should just vote now? What? No, no, no. 969 00:39:49,666 --> 00:39:50,899 It's not a vote. Then what was this all about? 970 00:39:50,967 --> 00:39:52,067 I don't know. 971 00:39:52,135 --> 00:39:53,502 This conversation really got away from me. 972 00:39:53,570 --> 00:39:55,004 I don't care. They can just vote. 973 00:39:55,071 --> 00:39:56,672 No, they can't. 974 00:39:56,740 --> 00:39:58,474 That's not how this is gonna work. 975 00:39:58,541 --> 00:39:59,908 We're going in this room. 976 00:39:59,976 --> 00:40:01,410 We're gonna have a meeting. 977 00:40:01,478 --> 00:40:03,312 We're gonna make a recommendation to Jo, 978 00:40:03,380 --> 00:40:05,881 and she's gonna give you her recommendation on Monday, okay? 979 00:40:05,949 --> 00:40:08,050 What the hell happened out there? 980 00:40:12,122 --> 00:40:15,257 Sometimes you hear people talking about failing upwards. 981 00:40:15,325 --> 00:40:18,694 I think I'm about to do that. 982 00:40:18,762 --> 00:40:21,530 This job? Oh, yeah, I'll get it. 983 00:40:21,598 --> 00:40:23,732 Jo's an old friend. 984 00:40:23,800 --> 00:40:26,835 I think... M her best friend. 985 00:40:26,903 --> 00:40:28,671 She's not my best friend. 986 00:40:28,738 --> 00:40:30,572 Every day, I have a blueberry muffin. 987 00:40:30,640 --> 00:40:33,575 Today I did not have a blueberry muffin. 988 00:40:33,643 --> 00:40:36,278 Should have had the blueberry muffin. 989 00:40:36,346 --> 00:40:39,715 Especially considering how incredibly superstitious I am. 990 00:40:39,783 --> 00:40:42,584 No. I've never been more sure of anything in my life. 991 00:40:42,652 --> 00:40:46,221 I will be the new boss of... 992 00:40:46,289 --> 00:40:48,691 Vance refrigeration. 993 00:40:48,758 --> 00:40:51,527 Honestly, I think I-- I sabotaged myself. 994 00:40:51,594 --> 00:40:55,431 It's like I'm afraid of being happy. 995 00:40:55,498 --> 00:40:57,433 Case in point... 996 00:40:57,500 --> 00:41:00,002 I was supposed to start another job today. 997 00:41:00,070 --> 00:41:02,538 I will get offered the job. 998 00:41:02,605 --> 00:41:05,607 That's a...Call I've received many times. 999 00:41:05,675 --> 00:41:08,610 The slight... Hopefulness in their voice, 1000 00:41:08,678 --> 00:41:10,979 the pregnant pause while they... 1001 00:41:11,047 --> 00:41:13,382 Wait to hear my response. 1002 00:41:13,450 --> 00:41:16,385 And then... My response. 1003 00:41:17,654 --> 00:41:18,787 I want the job. 1004 00:41:18,855 --> 00:41:20,489 I really do. 1005 00:41:20,557 --> 00:41:21,890 It's just the rest of my family's 1006 00:41:21,958 --> 00:41:23,425 in the Finger Lakes right now. 1007 00:41:23,493 --> 00:41:26,161 I'm supposed to be in the Finger Lakes right now. 1008 00:41:26,229 --> 00:41:29,631 I told 'em I was on a hike, snuck away to do this interview. 1009 00:41:29,699 --> 00:41:32,568 I gotta get back pretty soon. They'll worry. 1010 00:41:32,635 --> 00:41:34,703 People disappear in the Finger Lakes. 1011 00:41:34,771 --> 00:41:36,972 I will run this branch 1012 00:41:37,040 --> 00:41:41,977 or I will destroy this branch. 1013 00:41:42,045 --> 00:41:44,179 Or...I don't know. 1014 00:41:44,247 --> 00:41:46,048 Something always works out. 1015 00:41:50,988 --> 00:41:55,721 Sync by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com 1016 00:41:57,633 --> 00:41:59,934 You remind me so much of my fourth biggest client. 1017 00:42:00,002 --> 00:42:01,169 Is that right? 1018 00:42:01,236 --> 00:42:02,637 I think you two should meet. 1019 00:42:02,705 --> 00:42:04,605 Well, okay... 1020 00:42:04,673 --> 00:42:06,007 Hey, Jordana, patch my ninth 1021 00:42:06,075 --> 00:42:08,009 and my fourth biggest client together. 1022 00:42:12,181 --> 00:42:14,449 Hello? Hello! 1023 00:42:14,516 --> 00:42:17,452 Hi, how are ya? Oh, I'm good! 1024 00:42:17,453 --> 00:42:21,346 Don't you just love paper and things about paper? 1025 00:42:21,758 --> 00:42:25,093 Hey! Are you single? This seems like a love connection to me! 1026 00:42:25,484 --> 00:42:27,000 * 9999 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net