1 00:00:07,740 --> 00:00:09,410 Right! Now, 2 00:00:09,500 --> 00:00:13,890 this is Mr Bennett, and he's going to be taking the boys for football. 3 00:00:14,220 --> 00:00:17,210 Mr Bennett foolishly wants to be a teacher. 4 00:00:17,300 --> 00:00:20,050 - Look at the fucking shell suit, man. - Fucking wanker. 5 00:00:20,140 --> 00:00:23,010 - I don't believe it. - Fucking, yeah. 6 00:00:23,100 --> 00:00:24,810 CHAUHAN: ...the sun shines out of his proverbial. 7 00:00:24,900 --> 00:00:26,690 What you fucking looking at? 8 00:00:26,780 --> 00:00:30,250 Less fucking and more attention, please. 9 00:00:31,100 --> 00:00:33,450 Something you might have said to your boyfriend, that, Gina. 10 00:00:33,540 --> 00:00:34,860 (ALL SNICKERING) 11 00:00:34,940 --> 00:00:37,850 Right, girls onto the other pitch with me. Come on. 12 00:00:39,420 --> 00:00:41,170 (BLOWING WHISTLE) 13 00:00:42,820 --> 00:00:45,650 - You, boy. Why aren't you playing? - Forgot my kit. 14 00:00:45,740 --> 00:00:48,300 Don't make him play, sir. He's shit. 15 00:00:49,140 --> 00:00:51,370 Balls, Mr Bennett! 16 00:00:51,860 --> 00:00:54,810 Right. Look, I want you joining in, all right? 17 00:00:54,900 --> 00:00:57,460 - You ain't playing, Gangel. - Fuck off, McBride. 18 00:00:58,460 --> 00:00:59,970 - Guys! - Oh, come on. 19 00:01:00,060 --> 00:01:01,810 Pass it round. Keep passing it. 20 00:01:01,900 --> 00:01:03,730 Ste! Come on. 21 00:01:04,420 --> 00:01:05,640 Lovely. 22 00:01:07,140 --> 00:01:08,490 Go get it. 23 00:01:11,220 --> 00:01:13,130 Oi! What's his name? 24 00:01:13,460 --> 00:01:15,410 Hugh, sir. Hugh Janus. 25 00:01:15,500 --> 00:01:17,810 Hugh Janus, get back here now! 26 00:01:18,860 --> 00:01:20,650 BENNETT: Hugh Janus! 27 00:01:20,740 --> 00:01:22,610 Janus, are you deaf? 28 00:03:11,020 --> 00:03:12,370 All right, Sandra? 29 00:03:12,460 --> 00:03:13,650 Slag. 30 00:03:19,300 --> 00:03:21,130 Sweet, I must go. 31 00:03:23,820 --> 00:03:25,010 (DOOR CLOSING) 32 00:03:38,340 --> 00:03:41,010 What happened? School burnt down, did it? 33 00:03:41,100 --> 00:03:42,290 Yeah. 34 00:03:42,660 --> 00:03:45,690 What was it this time? IRA bomb? 35 00:03:46,060 --> 00:03:47,890 Fundamentalist Muslim pyromaniacs. 36 00:03:47,980 --> 00:03:50,930 Oh, funny that. Looked all right when I walked past it. 37 00:03:51,020 --> 00:03:52,730 Yeah. "Funny that." 38 00:03:52,940 --> 00:03:55,810 Look, you're not too old to be taken over me knee, young man. Do you hear me? 39 00:03:55,900 --> 00:03:57,220 Whole of bloody Thamesmead can hear you. 40 00:03:57,300 --> 00:03:59,760 Yeah, well, you've gotta start doing your games. 41 00:03:59,860 --> 00:04:01,250 - Why? - 'Cause you have, that's why. 42 00:04:01,340 --> 00:04:02,480 - Who says? - I says. 43 00:04:02,580 --> 00:04:04,050 - I hate football. - You never used to. 44 00:04:04,140 --> 00:04:05,690 Well, I do now! 45 00:04:07,980 --> 00:04:10,440 You know what I'm gonna do now, don't you? 46 00:04:11,260 --> 00:04:12,970 Juggle with them? 47 00:04:29,620 --> 00:04:33,650 SANDRA: You know what they're gonna do, don't you? They'll put you into care. 48 00:04:33,740 --> 00:04:37,410 They'll say, "She's an unfit mother, bang him into one of them homes. 49 00:04:37,500 --> 00:04:39,850 "'Cause, I mean, she can't even get him to do his PE." 50 00:04:39,940 --> 00:04:41,010 That's what they're gonna do. 51 00:04:41,100 --> 00:04:44,800 She's throwing away everything I was saving for me kids. Books, toys. 52 00:04:44,900 --> 00:04:47,360 - I don't want kids. - Kids are cunts. 53 00:04:48,420 --> 00:04:50,650 Anyone been calling you names? 54 00:04:50,740 --> 00:04:53,010 - Like what? - I dunno. 55 00:04:53,100 --> 00:04:54,420 - Stumpy? - No. 56 00:04:54,500 --> 00:04:55,970 - I told you it'd stop. - I know. 57 00:04:56,060 --> 00:04:57,250 I told you you'd grow, 58 00:04:57,340 --> 00:04:59,290 but you don't take the blindest bit of notice of me, do you? 59 00:04:59,380 --> 00:05:01,050 - Yes, I do. - Oh, yeah? 60 00:05:01,140 --> 00:05:04,610 How comes every Wednesday afternoon without fail you're standing there? 61 00:05:04,700 --> 00:05:07,490 - I've told you. - Oh, have you? 62 00:05:09,060 --> 00:05:13,450 # Call the village band out Bid me goodbye # 63 00:05:13,540 --> 00:05:15,410 - What you doing? - Singing. 64 00:05:15,500 --> 00:05:18,410 - What? - I'm just a girl who can't say no. 65 00:05:20,060 --> 00:05:21,970 Heard of Mama Cass? 66 00:05:22,340 --> 00:05:23,560 No, sing it. 67 00:05:23,660 --> 00:05:25,650 LEAH: What? JAMIE: Go on. 68 00:05:25,740 --> 00:05:28,690 - No way. - I won't laugh. 69 00:05:29,180 --> 00:05:30,290 (CLEARING THROAT) 70 00:05:31,380 --> 00:05:35,890 # Call the village band out Bid me goodbye 71 00:05:37,300 --> 00:05:41,290 # Everybody stand outside and cry 72 00:05:42,860 --> 00:05:47,650 # Never thought so many Thought me so dear 73 00:05:48,660 --> 00:05:52,650 # I'd be happy any place but here 74 00:05:53,740 --> 00:05:57,730 # One way ticket take me anywhere 75 00:05:59,460 --> 00:06:03,930 # Northbound, southbound, I don't even care 76 00:06:05,780 --> 00:06:09,050 # I know the grass is greener there # 77 00:06:14,020 --> 00:06:15,410 Keep going. 78 00:06:16,100 --> 00:06:18,170 You might persuade him to get back to school. 79 00:06:18,260 --> 00:06:19,850 Libs. 80 00:06:20,740 --> 00:06:22,810 - That's not natural, is it? - What ain't? 81 00:06:22,900 --> 00:06:25,360 A girl her age into Mama Cass. 82 00:06:25,460 --> 00:06:27,170 She's got a really beautiful voice. 83 00:06:27,260 --> 00:06:28,610 And what's the matter with Madonna? 84 00:06:28,700 --> 00:06:30,690 - She's a slag. - Hypocrite. 85 00:06:34,580 --> 00:06:36,890 - All right, Ste? - Ste, all right? 86 00:06:37,460 --> 00:06:38,930 You two been bunking off together, have you? 87 00:06:39,020 --> 00:06:40,570 Not together, no. 88 00:06:40,940 --> 00:06:42,130 You all right, Mrs Gangel? 89 00:06:42,220 --> 00:06:44,650 Well, it's nice to see someone can stay at school for the full day. 90 00:06:44,740 --> 00:06:45,850 We done football today. 91 00:06:45,940 --> 00:06:47,450 Wrong season for football, innit? 92 00:06:47,540 --> 00:06:50,810 - Student teacher. - Ah, is that the problem? 93 00:06:50,900 --> 00:06:52,930 - No. - Well, what is, then? 94 00:06:54,060 --> 00:06:55,810 - I'd best get in. - Aw, Ste. 95 00:06:56,340 --> 00:06:57,530 I'm doing the tea. 96 00:06:57,620 --> 00:06:59,010 Stick it on, then come back out here. 97 00:06:59,100 --> 00:07:01,090 It's bubble and squeak, Leah. You can't leave bubble and squeak. 98 00:07:01,180 --> 00:07:02,970 You gotta watch it like a hawk. 99 00:07:03,060 --> 00:07:04,890 Don't that make you fart? Bubble and squeak? 100 00:07:04,980 --> 00:07:06,610 Only if you've got a fat arse. 101 00:07:06,700 --> 00:07:08,810 There was a phone-in this morning on Richard & Judy 102 00:07:08,900 --> 00:07:11,890 about delinquent children. I should've rang in. 103 00:07:11,980 --> 00:07:13,930 - I'm going in. - See you, Ste. 104 00:07:14,380 --> 00:07:16,690 SANDRA: Whose fault is it, then, eh? LEAH: The system. 105 00:07:16,820 --> 00:07:20,810 I am a victim of the education... Thingy-ma-bob. 106 00:07:21,260 --> 00:07:22,330 Wasteland. 107 00:07:22,420 --> 00:07:25,060 You're a victim of your own big mouth, more like. 108 00:07:25,140 --> 00:07:28,050 Leah, luv, get in here and peel some taters for tea, will you? 109 00:07:28,140 --> 00:07:29,810 Ah, kiss my arse. 110 00:07:30,380 --> 00:07:33,410 You, indoors. She's a bad influence. 111 00:07:34,140 --> 00:07:35,610 She's a bad influence. 112 00:07:35,700 --> 00:07:38,450 Right, you don't peel no taters, you don't get no tea. 113 00:07:38,540 --> 00:07:39,650 Jamie! 114 00:07:39,740 --> 00:07:41,090 Rainbow's gone anyway. 115 00:07:41,180 --> 00:07:42,250 (PHONE RINGING) 116 00:07:42,340 --> 00:07:43,370 That'll be the phone. 117 00:07:43,460 --> 00:07:46,530 Well, it wouldn't be the bloody Hoover bag, would it? 118 00:07:54,460 --> 00:07:57,810 I know, Miss Chauhan. But, you see, Miss Chauhan... 119 00:07:59,100 --> 00:08:00,850 He's got a funny tummy, you know. 120 00:08:00,940 --> 00:08:05,730 I mean, he really wanted to do football today, but he got taken short, see. 121 00:08:05,980 --> 00:08:11,130 Mmm. And when he got to the boy's loos, they were all locked up, inexplicably. 122 00:08:11,700 --> 00:08:13,490 So, he had a little accident, you know. 123 00:08:16,100 --> 00:08:19,250 Oh, yeah. I couldn't agree with you more, Miss Chauhan. 124 00:08:19,340 --> 00:08:20,770 I mean, when I was at school 125 00:08:20,860 --> 00:08:24,210 I was reserve captain for the Under-16s netball team, 126 00:08:24,300 --> 00:08:28,650 so I can appreciate the, like, value of exercise and sport. 127 00:08:29,180 --> 00:08:33,170 I mean, I'd hate you to think this was any reflection on me meself. 128 00:08:34,580 --> 00:08:35,970 ANNOUNCER ON RADIO: It's slow northbound 129 00:08:36,060 --> 00:08:38,050 due to an over-height vehicle stuck in the entrance, 130 00:08:38,140 --> 00:08:40,780 and on Shooters Hill the lights are out next to the police station. 131 00:08:40,860 --> 00:08:44,130 And on the A2, ongoing roadworks are causing delays 132 00:08:44,220 --> 00:08:46,410 on the contraflow southbound through Bexleyheath. 133 00:08:46,500 --> 00:08:48,770 Now the weather for this area. 134 00:08:48,860 --> 00:08:52,210 Overnight, it will be humid, with a low of 16 degrees centigrade. 135 00:08:52,300 --> 00:08:54,290 Tomorrow will be dry, hot and sunny, 136 00:08:54,380 --> 00:08:56,890 with a maximum temperature of 28 degrees. 137 00:08:56,980 --> 00:08:58,650 This is RTN. 138 00:09:03,140 --> 00:09:04,770 I'm going to work. 139 00:09:04,860 --> 00:09:06,130 There's a cheese salad in the fridge, 140 00:09:06,220 --> 00:09:08,050 and the one with the beetroot's for Tony. 141 00:09:08,140 --> 00:09:09,810 I don't need a babysitter. 142 00:09:09,900 --> 00:09:12,010 No. I know what you need. 143 00:09:13,740 --> 00:09:15,250 Shooting. 144 00:09:15,340 --> 00:09:17,170 - I heard that. - Yeah, well... 145 00:09:17,260 --> 00:09:20,650 You could hear a zit burst in Australia, you, couldn't you? 146 00:09:20,740 --> 00:09:23,170 If you shot me, you'd have to go to prison and live off gruel. 147 00:09:23,260 --> 00:09:24,810 Don't tempt me. 148 00:09:25,100 --> 00:09:28,770 I'll be checking your homework when I get back. Be warned. 149 00:09:48,540 --> 00:09:50,490 (ONE WAY TICKET BLARING) 150 00:09:57,580 --> 00:09:59,010 Oi, Rose! 151 00:10:00,500 --> 00:10:01,720 Attaboy, Ste. 152 00:10:01,820 --> 00:10:03,330 Get her to turn it down, will you? 153 00:10:03,420 --> 00:10:04,560 What do you think I'm trying to do? 154 00:10:04,660 --> 00:10:06,250 Me old man's trying to get some kip in there! 155 00:10:06,340 --> 00:10:07,410 And I'm trying to make chips! 156 00:10:07,500 --> 00:10:10,090 She's only gone and locked herself in her bloody room, ain't she? 157 00:10:10,180 --> 00:10:12,850 Leah! I'm on tablets, you know. 158 00:10:12,940 --> 00:10:14,410 Can I get in and try? 159 00:10:14,500 --> 00:10:15,720 I give up. 160 00:10:15,820 --> 00:10:17,730 STE: Leah! Leah! 161 00:10:17,820 --> 00:10:19,330 LEAH: This is my idol! 162 00:10:19,420 --> 00:10:23,250 Leah, spare some thought for all the nice people who live round here. 163 00:10:23,340 --> 00:10:25,330 Some of them don't like Mama Cass, you know. 164 00:10:25,420 --> 00:10:28,170 LEAH: Well, they should! STE: Leah, please! 165 00:10:28,260 --> 00:10:32,810 ROSE: Oh, I suppose I should be glad it's not techno, acidic, 166 00:10:32,900 --> 00:10:36,170 housey housey, pop trash. 167 00:10:36,260 --> 00:10:37,450 Leah! 168 00:10:37,540 --> 00:10:39,010 What's all the bloody noise? 169 00:10:39,100 --> 00:10:41,010 It's her. She can't control her kids. 170 00:10:41,100 --> 00:10:42,420 I've only got the one, you know. 171 00:10:42,500 --> 00:10:43,570 Just as bloody well. 172 00:10:43,660 --> 00:10:46,040 Rose, turn that bloody racket down, will you? 173 00:10:46,140 --> 00:10:48,250 Do you think I'm enjoying this? 174 00:10:49,540 --> 00:10:50,680 Leah! 175 00:10:50,780 --> 00:10:53,210 (ONE WAY TICKET CONTINUES BLARING) 176 00:10:55,820 --> 00:10:57,490 Oi! Mush! 177 00:10:58,220 --> 00:11:00,050 LEAH: Is that Trevor? 178 00:11:12,340 --> 00:11:16,330 You only had to ask, Trevor. You know I'd do anything for you. 179 00:11:16,540 --> 00:11:18,170 Or to you. 180 00:11:18,700 --> 00:11:19,920 (SCOFFS) 181 00:11:20,260 --> 00:11:22,450 I wouldn't touch it with his. 182 00:11:23,380 --> 00:11:24,850 See you later! 183 00:11:36,740 --> 00:11:38,450 Thank you, Trevor. 184 00:11:52,060 --> 00:11:54,250 Trevor! Trevor! 185 00:12:03,380 --> 00:12:05,940 Your mum told me straight, you know. 186 00:12:06,220 --> 00:12:07,570 Problems. 187 00:12:07,660 --> 00:12:09,650 (CHUCKLES) Been there. 188 00:12:10,980 --> 00:12:15,130 Walking across the park, game going on, my heart, you know, races. 189 00:12:16,580 --> 00:12:18,090 Scared, Jamie. 190 00:12:18,780 --> 00:12:22,660 Scared of the ball coming, you know, near me. 191 00:12:24,420 --> 00:12:26,930 Hey, we can fight this one together. 192 00:12:27,500 --> 00:12:29,250 Do you fancy a knockabout? 193 00:12:30,660 --> 00:12:33,730 No, me neither. But some time, yeah? 194 00:12:49,020 --> 00:12:51,090 It looks like fried shite. 195 00:12:54,980 --> 00:12:56,810 Trevor, make us a sandwich. 196 00:12:56,900 --> 00:12:58,890 - But he made it! - Trevor! 197 00:13:01,340 --> 00:13:03,130 Fucking hell. 198 00:13:33,220 --> 00:13:35,050 I can't eat all that. 199 00:13:51,660 --> 00:13:52,880 (CLICKS TONGUE) 200 00:14:09,420 --> 00:14:11,370 Where'd you meet my mum? 201 00:14:11,460 --> 00:14:12,850 Planet Earth. 202 00:14:12,940 --> 00:14:14,130 Where? 203 00:14:14,220 --> 00:14:17,850 Oh, you know, out and about, here and there. 204 00:14:18,780 --> 00:14:20,330 What's a place? 205 00:14:21,420 --> 00:14:26,540 A place is just somewhere where, you know, shit happens. 206 00:14:27,380 --> 00:14:29,010 Yeah, but where? 207 00:14:29,660 --> 00:14:30,930 Gateways. 208 00:14:33,780 --> 00:14:35,410 She turn you on? 209 00:14:35,940 --> 00:14:38,010 - Sure. - She's 35. 210 00:14:38,780 --> 00:14:42,010 What's age? Age is just... 211 00:14:43,500 --> 00:14:45,610 Just a number. You know? 212 00:14:45,980 --> 00:14:48,090 Mum said you was a painter. 213 00:14:48,580 --> 00:14:51,930 I know why she chose you. Needs the lounge done. 214 00:14:52,220 --> 00:14:53,730 Don't like the colour. 215 00:14:53,820 --> 00:14:55,810 Only had it painted last year. 216 00:14:55,900 --> 00:14:59,450 Like that, my mum, goes off things fast. 217 00:14:59,580 --> 00:15:01,370 (CHUCKLING) 218 00:15:01,580 --> 00:15:05,130 She might go off you. Won't be laughing then, will you? 219 00:15:09,620 --> 00:15:11,250 Is that a spliff? 220 00:15:13,940 --> 00:15:15,450 Well, give us some. 221 00:15:21,940 --> 00:15:23,450 - Hey. - What? 222 00:15:24,300 --> 00:15:26,610 Your mum's gonna be all right. 223 00:15:33,700 --> 00:15:35,450 (SOFT JAZZ PLAYING) 224 00:15:59,260 --> 00:16:01,490 Dry martini and lemonade, please. 225 00:16:01,580 --> 00:16:03,410 Pint of Pilsner. 226 00:16:03,500 --> 00:16:05,410 Lou, who served her? 227 00:16:07,020 --> 00:16:08,730 LOUISE: I don't know. 228 00:16:12,700 --> 00:16:15,890 There's no alcohol in it. What's this? Supposed to be a night out, isn't it? 229 00:16:15,980 --> 00:16:18,250 You, out! You're under-age. 230 00:16:18,340 --> 00:16:19,660 I'm only drinking Coke. 231 00:16:19,740 --> 00:16:22,200 You'll be drinking blood if I slap your face. Now move it. 232 00:16:22,300 --> 00:16:24,330 Oh, you're so hard. 233 00:16:24,420 --> 00:16:26,090 Was that a threat? 234 00:16:26,500 --> 00:16:28,880 Yeah, and here's another. 235 00:16:28,980 --> 00:16:31,330 Get out before I call your childminder. 236 00:16:31,420 --> 00:16:33,690 Come on, Slasher. I can't be arsed. 237 00:16:33,780 --> 00:16:36,810 Slasher? What'd you slash? Crepe paper? 238 00:16:36,900 --> 00:16:38,570 He's incontinent. 239 00:16:39,060 --> 00:16:40,410 Sandra! 240 00:16:43,340 --> 00:16:45,210 Is Louise taking care of you, Mr Barr? 241 00:16:45,300 --> 00:16:46,810 Of course. 242 00:16:47,300 --> 00:16:48,570 A word. 243 00:16:56,460 --> 00:16:59,850 Jamie, how old are you? 244 00:17:00,820 --> 00:17:03,200 Old enough. How old are you? 245 00:17:04,340 --> 00:17:07,810 Twenty-seven. Not old enough to be your dad, right? 246 00:17:08,500 --> 00:17:09,530 What? 247 00:17:10,380 --> 00:17:11,600 Sure. 248 00:17:12,540 --> 00:17:13,650 What? 249 00:17:14,260 --> 00:17:17,730 It's just shit, isn't it? 250 00:17:19,300 --> 00:17:20,570 What? 251 00:17:20,660 --> 00:17:23,220 The whole concept. 252 00:17:24,820 --> 00:17:26,040 Yeah. 253 00:17:26,660 --> 00:17:31,970 Anyway, I think we should just, like, move towards getting away from all that. 254 00:17:32,700 --> 00:17:33,890 Right? 255 00:18:16,700 --> 00:18:18,090 (GROANING) 256 00:18:19,660 --> 00:18:21,690 Please, Trevor, I'm sorry. 257 00:18:25,220 --> 00:18:28,530 # How'd you like to have fun, fun, fun? 258 00:18:28,620 --> 00:18:29,730 (AUDIENCE CHEERING) 259 00:18:29,820 --> 00:18:32,490 # How's about a few laughs? 260 00:18:32,580 --> 00:18:34,930 # I can show you a good time # 261 00:18:35,180 --> 00:18:39,130 You'll breeze it, princess. Unless you really balls it up, the job's yours. 262 00:18:39,220 --> 00:18:41,890 What sort of questions will they ask? 263 00:18:43,260 --> 00:18:46,730 You're interviewing for a new barmaid. You got three birds up for the one job. 264 00:18:46,820 --> 00:18:50,210 You say, "If you find a fiver on the floor at the end of the night, 265 00:18:50,300 --> 00:18:51,410 "what do you do with it?" 266 00:18:51,500 --> 00:18:53,090 First bird goes, "I'd hang onto it, 267 00:18:53,180 --> 00:18:55,560 "ask round the next night to see if anyone's lost one." 268 00:18:55,660 --> 00:18:58,170 Second bird goes, "I'd put it in the till." 269 00:18:58,260 --> 00:19:01,770 Third bird goes, "I'd pocket it. Finders keepers." 270 00:19:02,420 --> 00:19:04,490 Who do you give the job to? 271 00:19:06,340 --> 00:19:08,570 The one with the biggest tits. 272 00:19:08,660 --> 00:19:10,170 (LAUGHING) 273 00:19:12,860 --> 00:19:17,330 # Spend a little time with me 274 00:19:17,820 --> 00:19:19,570 (AUDIENCE CHEERING) 275 00:19:20,220 --> 00:19:22,290 # Me # 276 00:19:22,380 --> 00:19:24,170 (AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) 277 00:19:27,180 --> 00:19:29,130 I'd have me own flat. 278 00:19:30,420 --> 00:19:32,880 I'd be down Stringfellows every night. 279 00:19:32,980 --> 00:19:34,730 I'd get meself a big drug problem. 280 00:19:34,820 --> 00:19:36,210 (CHUCKLING) 281 00:19:37,820 --> 00:19:40,280 I'd have me own miniature poodle. 282 00:19:40,780 --> 00:19:44,480 And I'd get meself a makeover. You could do all that if you had your own pub. 283 00:19:44,580 --> 00:19:46,210 I haven't had the interview yet. 284 00:19:46,300 --> 00:19:49,050 One of these days I'm going to be dripping in money, I am. 285 00:19:49,140 --> 00:19:50,530 Right, this is me. See you tomorrow, babes. 286 00:19:50,620 --> 00:19:52,210 See you, love. 287 00:20:07,260 --> 00:20:08,400 Ste? 288 00:20:08,500 --> 00:20:09,820 (SNIFFLES) 289 00:20:24,460 --> 00:20:25,680 Ste? 290 00:20:30,380 --> 00:20:32,410 I'm not going back there. 291 00:20:37,260 --> 00:20:38,730 I know, love. 292 00:20:45,260 --> 00:20:46,810 (CRYING) 293 00:20:55,700 --> 00:20:57,170 (DOOR OPENING) 294 00:21:00,700 --> 00:21:02,410 Tony, make him a sandwich. 295 00:21:02,780 --> 00:21:03,810 What? 296 00:21:03,900 --> 00:21:05,040 Tony. 297 00:21:06,260 --> 00:21:09,410 What's it to be? Pastrami and fettuccine on rye? 298 00:21:09,500 --> 00:21:12,140 Tony, just make him a sandwich, please. 299 00:21:16,740 --> 00:21:20,050 You'll have to top and tail with Jamie, I'm afraid. 300 00:21:26,340 --> 00:21:27,690 (KNOCKING) 301 00:21:29,820 --> 00:21:32,330 Ronnie! Trevor! It's me, Sandra! 302 00:21:37,340 --> 00:21:40,170 Your little Steven's round at our place tonight. 303 00:21:40,260 --> 00:21:43,490 I've every mind to report you, Ronnie! Are you listening to me? 304 00:21:43,580 --> 00:21:45,810 It's Sandra here, and I'm not happy! 305 00:21:45,900 --> 00:21:48,330 RONNIE: Fuck off, you meddling cunt! 306 00:21:48,420 --> 00:21:50,410 This has got to stop! 307 00:21:55,900 --> 00:21:57,730 What are you reading, then? 308 00:21:58,500 --> 00:21:59,570 It's my mum's. 309 00:21:59,660 --> 00:22:01,290 Oh, yeah? I've seen that in the shop. 310 00:22:01,380 --> 00:22:02,930 - Hello! - Hello! 311 00:22:07,580 --> 00:22:08,610 What bit you reading? 312 00:22:08,700 --> 00:22:10,250 It's about Sally from Coronation Street. 313 00:22:10,340 --> 00:22:11,410 What, that blonde one? 314 00:22:11,500 --> 00:22:12,820 Yeah. Says her real name's Sally and all. 315 00:22:12,900 --> 00:22:14,250 What, in real life as well as on the telly? 316 00:22:14,340 --> 00:22:16,330 Yeah. I hate that name. 317 00:22:22,740 --> 00:22:25,250 Do you always wear glasses when you read? 318 00:22:25,340 --> 00:22:27,570 - I'm supposed to. - You don't in school. 319 00:22:27,660 --> 00:22:29,530 - It's hardly fetching, is it? - Nah, it looks all right. 320 00:22:29,620 --> 00:22:31,850 - Yeah? - Yeah, I'm telling you. 321 00:22:34,500 --> 00:22:37,140 - So, how's your sandwich? - Cheese and salad. Bang-on food. 322 00:22:37,220 --> 00:22:38,290 Good for your sports, that. 323 00:22:38,380 --> 00:22:40,170 That's right. Good for your spots and all. 324 00:22:40,260 --> 00:22:42,640 - You haven't got any spots. - Yours are cleaning up. 325 00:22:42,740 --> 00:22:44,060 Cheers. 326 00:22:47,580 --> 00:22:49,490 Do you fancy that Sally? 327 00:22:50,340 --> 00:22:52,610 Not really. Do you? 328 00:22:53,580 --> 00:22:56,010 Haven't given it much thought, really. 329 00:22:57,340 --> 00:22:58,660 Do you fancy her next door? 330 00:22:58,740 --> 00:23:00,770 - Fancy Leah? - She fancies you. 331 00:23:00,860 --> 00:23:02,330 - Don't. - I'm only saying. 332 00:23:02,420 --> 00:23:03,610 Jamie. 333 00:23:19,580 --> 00:23:21,290 You going to sleep? 334 00:23:21,460 --> 00:23:24,530 - Yeah, I'm knackered. - I'll turn the light off. 335 00:23:58,060 --> 00:24:00,970 - Ste? - Mmm-hmm? 336 00:24:02,260 --> 00:24:04,330 - You all right? - Yeah. 337 00:24:05,660 --> 00:24:07,050 Right. 338 00:24:12,740 --> 00:24:13,930 Ste? 339 00:24:14,900 --> 00:24:17,050 - What? - Night. 340 00:24:18,900 --> 00:24:20,330 Night, Jamie. 341 00:24:45,180 --> 00:24:46,730 (MAN WHISTLING) 342 00:24:51,500 --> 00:24:54,210 The second applicant says, "I'd put it in the till." 343 00:24:54,300 --> 00:24:57,410 The third applicant says, "I'd keep it for myself. 344 00:24:57,500 --> 00:24:59,170 "Finders keepers." 345 00:24:59,580 --> 00:25:01,930 To whom would you offer the job? 346 00:25:02,500 --> 00:25:05,770 Well, it's obvious, innit? The bird with the biggest tits. 347 00:25:05,860 --> 00:25:07,210 (CHUCKLING) 348 00:25:14,260 --> 00:25:18,810 Though seriously, I'd have to say I'd be more keen on the third applicant. 349 00:25:18,900 --> 00:25:21,570 At least I'd know where I stood with her. 350 00:25:22,900 --> 00:25:24,650 You have children, Mrs Gangel? 351 00:25:24,740 --> 00:25:28,410 That's an easy one. A son. Jamie. He's ever so nice. 352 00:25:32,580 --> 00:25:35,010 I really fucked that up, didn't I? 353 00:25:35,660 --> 00:25:37,810 You'll hear soon, princess. 354 00:26:14,340 --> 00:26:15,730 Yo. 355 00:26:22,980 --> 00:26:24,300 Pervert. 356 00:26:25,660 --> 00:26:26,850 Sorry? 357 00:26:29,740 --> 00:26:33,730 I think you'll find the word "pervert" is a serious no-no. 358 00:26:34,740 --> 00:26:38,730 Anyone who goes out with that old slapper has to be a pervert. 359 00:26:39,140 --> 00:26:40,730 Come again? 360 00:26:40,820 --> 00:26:42,170 Your bird. 361 00:26:42,820 --> 00:26:44,170 Sandra? 362 00:26:44,260 --> 00:26:47,250 She talks to me like I got "cunt" written on my forehead. 363 00:26:47,340 --> 00:26:49,770 You shouldn't use words like "bird". 364 00:26:55,700 --> 00:27:00,090 You wanna watch yourself. Sandra's got a reputation. 365 00:27:01,500 --> 00:27:03,410 I'm not saying nothing. 366 00:27:07,980 --> 00:27:09,170 Anyone got a match? 367 00:27:09,260 --> 00:27:10,650 Yeah, my arse and your face. 368 00:27:10,740 --> 00:27:13,050 Your arse ain't that nice, love. 369 00:27:13,860 --> 00:27:15,690 Oh, grow up! 370 00:27:16,980 --> 00:27:20,970 Oi! Linda Lusardi. Get in here and cover yourself up. 371 00:27:22,980 --> 00:27:25,050 WOMAN: What are you doing, shouting at me in front of them? 372 00:27:25,140 --> 00:27:28,290 MAN: Well, look at you! Out there with your tits all hanging out. 373 00:27:28,380 --> 00:27:30,530 (COUPLE ARGUING) 374 00:27:35,780 --> 00:27:37,970 - Over here! - Over here. 375 00:27:46,180 --> 00:27:47,810 BOY: All right, control it! 376 00:27:49,660 --> 00:27:51,170 (BOYS SHOUTING) 377 00:27:53,780 --> 00:27:55,250 Well, get us my ball back! 378 00:27:55,340 --> 00:27:56,850 (BOYS LAUGHING) 379 00:27:58,620 --> 00:28:00,290 Get it yourself! 380 00:29:05,620 --> 00:29:08,530 - SANDRA: You okay today, Ste? - Yeah. 381 00:29:09,900 --> 00:29:13,780 I went to see a new school today. There's only 20 kids in the whole place. 382 00:29:13,860 --> 00:29:16,010 There'll be 22 if you go. You and Mama Cass. 383 00:29:16,100 --> 00:29:17,370 (LAUGHING) 384 00:29:18,580 --> 00:29:20,250 - Is it residential? - No. 385 00:29:20,340 --> 00:29:23,170 That's a shame. I could've given you a hand packing. 386 00:29:23,260 --> 00:29:25,370 We could've packed that fat bitch and her music and all. 387 00:29:25,460 --> 00:29:27,610 You shouldn't speak ill of the dead. 388 00:29:27,700 --> 00:29:29,970 (CHUCKLING) It's a shame how she died. 389 00:29:30,060 --> 00:29:32,890 - How did she die? - Choking on a sandwich. 390 00:29:32,980 --> 00:29:35,130 Now you know why I tell you not to gobble your chips down. 391 00:29:35,220 --> 00:29:36,890 - TONY: Wasn't she heavily into drugs? - Was she? 392 00:29:36,980 --> 00:29:39,730 Well, I suppose if you're that fat, drugs are probably a happy release. 393 00:29:39,820 --> 00:29:41,570 Maybe she was happy being fat. 394 00:29:41,660 --> 00:29:46,410 If she was so happy being fat, Jamie, why did she die choking on a sandwich? 395 00:29:46,500 --> 00:29:48,650 Why wasn't it a walloping great fry-up or summat? 396 00:29:48,740 --> 00:29:50,330 It might've been a bacon and egg sandwich. 397 00:29:50,420 --> 00:29:51,530 (ALL LAUGHING) 398 00:29:51,620 --> 00:29:53,730 No, it's coming to me now. 399 00:29:54,100 --> 00:29:57,450 It was definitely beef or chicken, something low in cholesterol. 400 00:29:57,540 --> 00:29:59,210 Hark at her, the fountain of all knowledge. 401 00:29:59,300 --> 00:30:00,410 Yeah, well. 402 00:30:00,500 --> 00:30:02,530 When you can keep up with the questions on Bob's Full House, 403 00:30:02,620 --> 00:30:03,730 get back to me, okay? 404 00:30:03,820 --> 00:30:06,170 - I'm more of a Mastermind man. - Liar! 405 00:30:06,260 --> 00:30:09,290 Did anyone see University Challenge last week? 406 00:30:11,740 --> 00:30:13,130 Me neither. 407 00:30:13,580 --> 00:30:16,690 Tony, crack me open another one, will you? 408 00:30:19,980 --> 00:30:24,250 I fancy something wet dribbling down the back of me gullet. What do you say? 409 00:30:25,180 --> 00:30:26,890 I say ditto, right? 410 00:30:28,740 --> 00:30:30,130 Well, you can say what you like, love, 411 00:30:30,220 --> 00:30:32,330 but it's better in than out, do you know what I mean? 412 00:30:32,420 --> 00:30:35,210 - Oh, shut up! - Oi! Manners! 413 00:30:35,300 --> 00:30:36,440 Me mother never taught me none. 414 00:30:36,540 --> 00:30:38,130 (CHUCKLES) He makes me die, he does. 415 00:30:38,220 --> 00:30:40,050 That's the intention. 416 00:30:40,420 --> 00:30:42,930 Bet you don't talk to your old man like that, eh, Ste? 417 00:30:43,020 --> 00:30:44,810 I don't speak. Full stop. 418 00:30:44,900 --> 00:30:46,730 Oh, no offence, Ste. You know what I mean? 419 00:30:46,820 --> 00:30:48,690 - Mum! - I gotta get in. 420 00:30:49,420 --> 00:30:52,410 - Yeah, you do that, Ste. - I'm going boxing with me dad later. 421 00:30:52,500 --> 00:30:55,530 What? Can't you get enough of it, Ste? 422 00:30:55,620 --> 00:30:57,330 (SANDRA SNICKERING) 423 00:30:58,580 --> 00:31:00,330 No, spectating. 424 00:31:01,740 --> 00:31:05,570 Weren't so funny when that bloke of yours beat you up, was it? 425 00:31:13,100 --> 00:31:15,810 Oh, you. You're so clever, aren't you? 426 00:31:16,260 --> 00:31:18,410 Well, just remember, I gave you those brains, so think on. 427 00:31:18,500 --> 00:31:19,890 I always thought you had a lobotomy. 428 00:31:19,980 --> 00:31:22,290 - What did he say? - Explain it to her, Tony. 429 00:31:22,380 --> 00:31:26,210 - Lobotomy, it's like when you split... - Yes! I know what it means, Tony! 430 00:31:26,300 --> 00:31:27,890 (GIRL CHATTERING ON TV) 431 00:31:27,980 --> 00:31:32,370 I work all the hours God sends just to keep you in insults. 432 00:31:32,460 --> 00:31:34,410 If this was my pub, I'd have you barred. 433 00:31:34,500 --> 00:31:37,650 Go on, then, bar me, kick me out. You wouldn't dare. 434 00:31:37,740 --> 00:31:41,250 Oh, look at you. Butter wouldn't melt. 435 00:31:41,340 --> 00:31:43,330 That's all right, Jamie. I've got your number. 436 00:31:43,420 --> 00:31:45,410 You got my number? Well, I've got yours, Sandra. 437 00:31:45,500 --> 00:31:47,210 So why don't you try and be a bit more like a mother to me? 438 00:31:47,300 --> 00:31:48,810 Oh, pull that one on me. 439 00:31:48,900 --> 00:31:51,730 I'm a terrible mother who don't know her arse from her elbow. 440 00:31:51,820 --> 00:31:53,810 I never had a mother, so what do I know about bringing up kids? 441 00:31:53,900 --> 00:31:55,410 I'm not surprised she abandoned you. 442 00:31:55,500 --> 00:31:57,530 You skinny little bastard! 443 00:31:57,620 --> 00:31:59,290 (JAMIE YELPING) 444 00:32:02,380 --> 00:32:03,730 (GRUNTING) 445 00:32:06,700 --> 00:32:07,770 Mum! 446 00:32:29,900 --> 00:32:31,930 Am I like my dad? 447 00:32:32,420 --> 00:32:34,450 No. 448 00:32:34,540 --> 00:32:36,090 You're like me. 449 00:32:38,580 --> 00:32:40,370 How am I weird? 450 00:32:41,100 --> 00:32:43,250 Just give it a rest, Jamie. Christ. 451 00:32:43,340 --> 00:32:45,090 You said it. 452 00:32:46,580 --> 00:32:49,220 You're all right. Okay? 453 00:32:50,420 --> 00:32:53,890 So you got me for a mother, but who said life was easy? 454 00:32:55,020 --> 00:32:57,890 You are. You're all right. 455 00:33:15,380 --> 00:33:16,730 (SNIFFLING) 456 00:33:31,980 --> 00:33:33,650 Do you wanna come to the boxing? 457 00:33:33,740 --> 00:33:34,960 Shut up. 458 00:33:35,060 --> 00:33:37,890 - I've got a spare ticket. - Leave me alone. 459 00:33:41,580 --> 00:33:43,850 - Are you all right? - Apparently. 460 00:34:02,180 --> 00:34:04,010 (ALL CHATTERING EXCITEDLY) 461 00:34:24,900 --> 00:34:26,890 STE: They think I'm a piece of shit. 462 00:35:05,380 --> 00:35:06,450 (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 463 00:35:06,540 --> 00:35:08,010 SANDRA: Jamie? 464 00:35:08,980 --> 00:35:11,650 Do you wanna watch The Sound of Music? 465 00:35:11,740 --> 00:35:14,570 - It's on Sky, Jamie. - We're going to sleep. 466 00:35:15,700 --> 00:35:17,970 Okay. Sorry, lads. 467 00:35:30,500 --> 00:35:33,090 It's me mum's. Body Shop. 468 00:35:35,500 --> 00:35:39,090 Peppermint Foot Lotion. Soothes your feet. 469 00:35:41,580 --> 00:35:45,570 Lie down and I'll rub it into your back, if you want. 470 00:36:25,820 --> 00:36:27,250 Cold, innit? 471 00:36:27,700 --> 00:36:28,840 Yeah. 472 00:36:42,900 --> 00:36:45,210 I'm gonna work at the sports centre. 473 00:36:45,300 --> 00:36:46,520 Yeah? 474 00:36:46,820 --> 00:36:51,010 Do me shifts in the fitness pool, do me shifts in the leisure pool. 475 00:36:51,260 --> 00:36:53,210 I know I can do it. 476 00:36:53,300 --> 00:36:55,170 You're a good swimmer. 477 00:36:55,980 --> 00:36:58,730 You're on your own when you're swimming. 478 00:37:10,140 --> 00:37:11,460 (STE GASPS) 479 00:37:11,980 --> 00:37:14,250 I'm gonna stink of mint. 480 00:37:14,340 --> 00:37:16,850 - Peppermint. - Peppermint. 481 00:37:24,660 --> 00:37:27,530 Have you ever kissed anyone? 482 00:37:29,140 --> 00:37:31,010 And stuck your tongue in? 483 00:37:31,100 --> 00:37:32,420 (CHUCKLES) 484 00:37:33,260 --> 00:37:35,170 Looking like this? 485 00:37:35,260 --> 00:37:37,290 You ain't ugly. 486 00:37:37,380 --> 00:37:39,370 They've made me ugly. 487 00:37:41,180 --> 00:37:43,170 I don't think you're ugly. 488 00:37:55,340 --> 00:37:57,650 Turn over, I'll do your front. 489 00:37:57,740 --> 00:37:59,290 I can't. 490 00:38:01,500 --> 00:38:04,450 I'm too sore. I'd make too much noise and your mum'd come in. 491 00:38:04,540 --> 00:38:05,730 (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 492 00:38:05,820 --> 00:38:09,520 SANDRA: Jamie? Sorry, love. Who played the baroness? 493 00:38:09,620 --> 00:38:11,730 - Fleanor Parker. - That's it! 494 00:38:11,820 --> 00:38:15,810 I wanna show off to Tony. Sorry, lads. It won't happen again. 495 00:38:19,260 --> 00:38:20,890 - Turn the light off. - No. 496 00:38:20,980 --> 00:38:23,090 - Please. - I don't wanna. 497 00:38:36,740 --> 00:38:38,730 Can I come up that end with you? 498 00:38:38,820 --> 00:38:40,570 - No. - Please. 499 00:38:40,660 --> 00:38:42,570 You stay where you are. 500 00:39:11,340 --> 00:39:14,570 - Satisfied? - Mmm. Night. 501 00:39:35,980 --> 00:39:37,890 Do you think I'm queer? 502 00:39:38,980 --> 00:39:41,090 Don't matter what I think. 503 00:39:52,260 --> 00:39:54,290 Can I touch you? 504 00:39:57,580 --> 00:39:59,370 I'm a bit sore. 505 00:40:02,540 --> 00:40:03,650 Yeah. 506 00:40:09,660 --> 00:40:13,170 (SIXTEEN, GOING ON SEVENTEEN PLAYING ON TV) 507 00:41:56,540 --> 00:41:57,610 Great kid! 508 00:41:57,700 --> 00:41:59,170 Fuck off, I'm minding her for my cousin. 509 00:41:59,260 --> 00:42:01,090 Motherhood suits you. 510 00:42:01,180 --> 00:42:04,490 Yeah, well, if I did get pregnant, I wouldn't get rid of it 511 00:42:04,580 --> 00:42:06,890 like some slappers I could mention. 512 00:42:06,980 --> 00:42:10,730 Well, you're with the black hole of Thamesmead, love, not me. 513 00:42:40,060 --> 00:42:41,810 (WOMAN TALKING INDISTINCTLY) 514 00:42:53,100 --> 00:42:55,250 (BOYS CHATTERING) 515 00:43:06,460 --> 00:43:08,250 All right, Ste? 516 00:43:20,060 --> 00:43:22,330 - Where are you going? - Out with me mates. 517 00:43:22,420 --> 00:43:24,650 Jamie, you haven't got any mates. 518 00:43:24,740 --> 00:43:27,850 - I'm going to a party. I won't be late. - I know. 519 00:43:29,940 --> 00:43:31,770 (TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING) 520 00:44:10,580 --> 00:44:13,650 I knocked for you a few times. Thought you might've come round. 521 00:44:13,740 --> 00:44:15,410 It's hot. It's a bloody heat wave, Jamie. 522 00:44:15,500 --> 00:44:16,890 You expect me to be indoors? 523 00:44:16,980 --> 00:44:19,890 No, it's just a bit weird. 524 00:44:19,980 --> 00:44:22,170 I was out, all right? What's weird about that? 525 00:44:22,260 --> 00:44:24,410 - Well, I've been worried about you. - Don't be. 526 00:44:24,500 --> 00:44:26,730 - Well, I was. - Well, don't be! 527 00:44:28,900 --> 00:44:31,810 Nothing's happened, yeah? I'm all right. I'm pukka. 528 00:44:31,900 --> 00:44:33,410 Everything... Everything's pukka. 529 00:44:33,500 --> 00:44:36,060 - You're black and blue. - Give it a rest, Jamie. 530 00:44:36,140 --> 00:44:38,410 Things getting better, are they? Daddy laid off the fist work? 531 00:44:38,500 --> 00:44:41,730 - Or haven't you burnt the tea lately? - I said, leave it out! 532 00:44:41,820 --> 00:44:44,330 - You're scared. - I ain't scared of nothing. 533 00:44:44,420 --> 00:44:46,210 - Yeah? - Yeah. 534 00:44:47,420 --> 00:44:49,800 Last week, right, I went to Woolwich. 535 00:44:49,900 --> 00:44:51,970 Coming out of this shop and there's this geezer in the gutter, 536 00:44:52,060 --> 00:44:54,410 pissed out of his skull, just lying there. 537 00:44:54,500 --> 00:44:58,490 Everyone was walking past him, and I had to step over him. 538 00:44:59,180 --> 00:45:00,970 It was my old man. 539 00:45:01,740 --> 00:45:02,770 It got me thinking on the bus. 540 00:45:02,860 --> 00:45:04,890 Why be scared of a bloke who's dead to the world? 541 00:45:04,980 --> 00:45:06,810 When he knocks ten different types of shite out of you... 542 00:45:06,900 --> 00:45:09,010 He's an embarrassment. He's nothing more, he's nothing less. 543 00:45:09,100 --> 00:45:12,570 - Why be scared of that? - Scared of being called queer? 544 00:45:16,660 --> 00:45:18,250 Are you? 545 00:45:18,340 --> 00:45:19,730 Maybe. 546 00:45:23,100 --> 00:45:24,970 Maybe not. 547 00:45:25,500 --> 00:45:28,010 - And are you? - Queer? 548 00:45:28,100 --> 00:45:30,290 Gay? 549 00:45:30,380 --> 00:45:31,930 I'm very happy. 550 00:45:33,820 --> 00:45:36,010 I'm happy when I'm with you. 551 00:45:38,740 --> 00:45:40,730 There, said it now. Go on, piss yourself. 552 00:45:40,820 --> 00:45:41,850 No. 553 00:45:41,940 --> 00:45:44,170 - Why? Don't you think it's funny? - I don't want to. 554 00:45:44,260 --> 00:45:45,650 I think it's hilarious. 555 00:45:45,740 --> 00:45:48,170 Well, why aren't you laughing, then? 556 00:45:57,260 --> 00:45:59,570 Do you wanna come round tonight? 557 00:46:00,980 --> 00:46:03,050 - Well, say something. - I can't. 558 00:46:03,660 --> 00:46:05,370 Say no, then. 559 00:46:16,500 --> 00:46:18,770 Look. Let's get a drink, eh? 560 00:46:29,980 --> 00:46:31,730 Scrub me back, Tony. 561 00:46:34,260 --> 00:46:36,050 Tony? 562 00:46:41,100 --> 00:46:43,090 Tony, what's the matter? 563 00:46:48,740 --> 00:46:49,880 Tony? 564 00:46:52,900 --> 00:46:55,280 It's just something Leah said. 565 00:46:57,340 --> 00:46:58,610 Leah? 566 00:46:58,700 --> 00:47:02,130 Right. I'll look away. You lot keep talking. Then, as a surprise, 567 00:47:02,220 --> 00:47:04,170 - hit me over the head with the tongs. - What? 568 00:47:04,260 --> 00:47:06,410 - It's an experiment. - Man, I'm wired. 569 00:47:06,500 --> 00:47:09,330 I don't understand this. Do you want me to hit you hard? 570 00:47:13,340 --> 00:47:15,490 - No! - I can fucking do it! 571 00:47:15,580 --> 00:47:17,090 Come on, talk. 572 00:47:21,500 --> 00:47:24,530 - I said, talk! - Is anybody else wired? 573 00:47:26,340 --> 00:47:29,130 Here, read this. The underlined bit. 574 00:47:30,580 --> 00:47:32,290 "Mama Cass wasn't allowed to join the group 575 00:47:32,380 --> 00:47:35,410 "because Phillips didn't think her range was high enough for his songs. 576 00:47:35,500 --> 00:47:39,170 "But one day when Cass was decorating at home, a lead pipe struck her on the head 577 00:47:39,260 --> 00:47:41,250 "and when she recovered from the resultant concussion..." 578 00:47:41,340 --> 00:47:42,480 Say it. 579 00:47:42,580 --> 00:47:44,610 "Lo and behold, her voice had changed." 580 00:47:44,700 --> 00:47:47,010 STE: "Lo and behold, her voice had changed." 581 00:47:47,260 --> 00:47:48,250 (SCREAMS) 582 00:47:49,100 --> 00:47:50,890 You twisted little bitch. 583 00:47:50,980 --> 00:47:52,330 (LEAH SCREAMING) 584 00:47:53,420 --> 00:47:56,250 How dare you say all those things to my fella? 585 00:47:56,340 --> 00:47:59,090 I lost that baby, you venomous little cow! 586 00:47:59,180 --> 00:48:02,050 You'll never turn Tony's mind against me, Leah, do you hear me? 587 00:48:02,140 --> 00:48:05,650 'Cause he sees you for the interfering little slapper that you are. 588 00:48:05,740 --> 00:48:08,330 - I wanted it to change. - Oh, well, some things never change. 589 00:48:08,420 --> 00:48:09,490 I wanted it to change! 590 00:48:09,580 --> 00:48:14,330 A leopard never changes its spots and a slapper never changes her knickers. 591 00:48:15,860 --> 00:48:18,370 - Be told! - RYAN: Man, I'm tripping. 592 00:48:18,980 --> 00:48:20,010 Come on, Tony. 593 00:48:20,100 --> 00:48:23,010 - Fancy a drink, babe? - Have a wank, Big Bollocks! 594 00:48:25,740 --> 00:48:28,650 Is that your mum, Gangel? No wonder you're fucking nuts! 595 00:48:28,740 --> 00:48:30,890 You shouldn't have said that to Tony. 596 00:48:30,980 --> 00:48:33,770 - Don't you start. - Shall I call an ambulance? 597 00:48:33,860 --> 00:48:36,090 Call a vet, have it put down. 598 00:48:37,660 --> 00:48:39,250 Hey, Ste! You got any of them Es left? 599 00:48:39,340 --> 00:48:40,890 - No! - Please, Steven! 600 00:48:40,980 --> 00:48:43,570 No way! Come on, Jamie, let's go. 601 00:48:43,660 --> 00:48:47,090 Give us an E, or I'll spread it round where you slept last week. 602 00:48:47,180 --> 00:48:48,370 What? 603 00:48:49,260 --> 00:48:51,640 - Don't know what you're talking about. - He slept on the couch. 604 00:48:51,740 --> 00:48:55,170 Not what I heard. Top to tail, your mum said, very nice. 605 00:48:55,260 --> 00:48:56,890 Take no notice, Ste. 606 00:48:56,980 --> 00:48:59,250 - What would your dad say? - Piss off, Leah! 607 00:48:59,340 --> 00:49:00,770 What would your Trevor say? 608 00:49:00,860 --> 00:49:02,180 - Leah! - Try it! 609 00:49:02,260 --> 00:49:03,290 I don't like hitting girls! 610 00:49:03,380 --> 00:49:05,410 Oh, hit me, then. Go on. Hit me. 611 00:49:05,500 --> 00:49:08,010 - You stupid queer! - Ste, come on. 612 00:49:14,900 --> 00:49:17,810 Oi! Trevor already knows! 613 00:49:21,420 --> 00:49:24,810 You know what them flats are like, walls paper-thin. 614 00:49:24,900 --> 00:49:27,890 Why do you think he's been twatting the face off of you? He knows! 615 00:49:27,980 --> 00:49:29,330 There's nothing to know. 616 00:49:29,420 --> 00:49:31,250 - Top to tail? - You know fuck all. 617 00:49:31,340 --> 00:49:32,890 LEAH: Oh, really? JAMIE: Yeah, really. 618 00:49:32,980 --> 00:49:34,530 Well, I know this much. 619 00:49:34,620 --> 00:49:37,410 I've been sticking up for you, for the pair of you. 620 00:49:37,500 --> 00:49:40,140 Told him I knew you'd slept on the couch. 621 00:49:40,220 --> 00:49:42,680 Told him I've been in and seen. 622 00:49:42,900 --> 00:49:45,280 I goes, "You shouldn't say things like that about your brother. 623 00:49:45,380 --> 00:49:46,650 "They're just mates." 624 00:49:46,740 --> 00:49:48,210 Nothing happened. 625 00:49:48,300 --> 00:49:49,730 When was the last time your Trevor hit you? 626 00:49:49,820 --> 00:49:51,690 - What's it to you? - LEAH: I bet it was Thursday. 627 00:49:51,780 --> 00:49:53,850 - So? - You see, that's when I told him. 628 00:49:53,940 --> 00:49:55,770 That's when I lied. 629 00:49:59,100 --> 00:50:01,610 - Give her an E. - No, it's all right. 630 00:50:01,700 --> 00:50:03,690 I'm not after sympathy. 631 00:50:07,100 --> 00:50:09,660 - We going, then? - Are you fucking stupid or what? 632 00:50:09,740 --> 00:50:11,490 - Ste... - Get your hands off me! 633 00:50:11,580 --> 00:50:14,690 - Ste... - Get your fucking queer hands off me! 634 00:50:19,700 --> 00:50:21,290 (GIRLS LAUGHING) 635 00:50:29,420 --> 00:50:31,210 BETTY: Ste's over there. 636 00:50:32,460 --> 00:50:33,450 Come on. 637 00:50:38,500 --> 00:50:40,330 - All right? - All right. 638 00:50:42,340 --> 00:50:44,650 - What you doing? - Oh, not a lot. 639 00:50:45,100 --> 00:50:47,660 Claire's mum's got some vodka back at their house, ain't she, Claire? 640 00:50:47,740 --> 00:50:50,200 Yeah, half a bottle. We're going back there now. 641 00:50:50,300 --> 00:50:52,810 Claire's mum works at the all-night garage, don't she, Claire? 642 00:50:52,900 --> 00:50:54,850 Yeah. Her name's Mary. 643 00:50:56,660 --> 00:50:58,970 Do you fancy some vodka, Ste? 644 00:50:59,500 --> 00:51:01,050 No, not really. 645 00:51:01,140 --> 00:51:03,370 - Well, then, see you. - See you. 646 00:51:03,500 --> 00:51:05,090 Come on, Claire. 647 00:51:07,740 --> 00:51:09,330 (GIRLS GIGGLING) 648 00:51:10,540 --> 00:51:12,770 I suppose a shag's out of the question, then? 649 00:51:12,860 --> 00:51:14,450 (GIRLS GIGGLING) 650 00:51:45,020 --> 00:51:47,330 - I'm going now. - All right, love. 651 00:51:47,420 --> 00:51:48,450 Oi! 652 00:52:01,500 --> 00:52:02,570 No! 653 00:52:03,500 --> 00:52:04,820 Yeah, I'll see you. 654 00:52:04,900 --> 00:52:07,330 See you. I wouldn't wanna be you. 655 00:52:13,020 --> 00:52:15,530 How do you fancy going to Greenwich? The park. 656 00:52:15,620 --> 00:52:18,000 "Legs astride the Meridian," as they say. 657 00:52:18,500 --> 00:52:20,880 I gotta finish the week's rota for work. 658 00:52:20,980 --> 00:52:23,650 You're addicted to that pub, addict. 659 00:52:23,740 --> 00:52:26,490 Don't knock it, there's money to be made in booze. 660 00:52:26,580 --> 00:52:28,650 Is that all you want outta life? 661 00:52:28,740 --> 00:52:30,610 All I want outta life is to make enough money 662 00:52:30,700 --> 00:52:33,080 to buy a decent pair of shoes that don't let the rain in. 663 00:52:33,180 --> 00:52:36,010 - I can get you shoes. - Oh, Tony... 664 00:52:36,260 --> 00:52:38,640 - I can make you shoes. - Tony. 665 00:52:40,340 --> 00:52:44,410 TONY: Right. I'll do some hoovering or whatever. 666 00:52:44,500 --> 00:52:46,370 But I thought you said you wanted to go to the park. 667 00:52:46,460 --> 00:52:47,930 It's no problem. 668 00:52:48,020 --> 00:52:50,090 - Yo, Ste! - You all right? 669 00:52:50,180 --> 00:52:53,170 Here, Ste. Any beans to spill? 670 00:52:53,260 --> 00:52:55,850 A little bird tells me you're in love. 671 00:52:56,980 --> 00:52:58,120 What? 672 00:52:58,220 --> 00:53:00,010 Four-letter word, "love". 673 00:53:00,740 --> 00:53:02,890 Oh, don't look so worried. Jamie told me all about it. 674 00:53:02,980 --> 00:53:05,730 She's just jealous, 20 years younger, it could've been her. 675 00:53:05,820 --> 00:53:07,850 Come on, what's she like? 676 00:53:08,260 --> 00:53:10,250 Well, what's her name, then? 677 00:53:10,340 --> 00:53:12,530 - No... - Oh, short for Noleen? 678 00:53:12,620 --> 00:53:14,010 It's very Home and Away. 679 00:53:14,500 --> 00:53:17,530 It's about time, too, you deserve a bit of luck. 680 00:53:17,620 --> 00:53:19,490 'Cause you're all right, you are. 681 00:53:19,580 --> 00:53:23,250 Here, buy Noleen a present with this. 682 00:53:24,820 --> 00:53:27,250 - Get her some flowers. - Sandra, I can't take your money. 683 00:53:27,340 --> 00:53:30,530 Oh, I had a good night for tips last night. Go on. 684 00:53:38,420 --> 00:53:39,850 It's for his bird. 685 00:53:39,940 --> 00:53:43,770 Do you have to use words like that? It really disempowers you. 686 00:53:57,820 --> 00:54:00,010 Noleen busy tonight, was she? 687 00:54:17,660 --> 00:54:19,090 I got you this. 688 00:54:32,820 --> 00:54:34,530 (IN A SOUTHERN ACCENT) My, what a pretty hat. 689 00:54:34,620 --> 00:54:37,410 It's the prettiest hat I ever did see, Master Steven. 690 00:54:37,500 --> 00:54:39,690 Does this mean we're engaged? 691 00:54:44,900 --> 00:54:46,010 What? 692 00:55:17,660 --> 00:55:18,930 Tony? 693 00:55:23,420 --> 00:55:24,530 Tony? 694 00:55:28,580 --> 00:55:29,970 Sort me out. 695 00:55:32,940 --> 00:55:34,260 (CLEARS THROAT) 696 00:55:45,260 --> 00:55:48,130 It just don't feel right, here. 697 00:55:48,220 --> 00:55:50,330 Your mum and Tony on the other side of that door. 698 00:55:50,420 --> 00:55:52,730 My old man and Trevor next door. 699 00:55:53,220 --> 00:55:54,290 I got an auntie in Gravesend. 700 00:55:54,380 --> 00:55:56,810 Thought we could go there one night, 'cause she's deaf. 701 00:55:56,900 --> 00:55:59,280 But that don't feel right either. 702 00:56:25,260 --> 00:56:26,480 (CHUCKLES) 703 00:56:32,500 --> 00:56:35,850 "You cannot transmit the HIV virus via frottage." 704 00:56:37,420 --> 00:56:38,850 What's frottage? 705 00:56:38,940 --> 00:56:40,770 It's yoghurt. It's French. 706 00:56:43,340 --> 00:56:46,570 "Dear Brian, I am 23, black and gay. 707 00:56:46,660 --> 00:56:49,040 "I am happy being with a man, but I get a horrible feeling 708 00:56:49,140 --> 00:56:51,250 "that people are going to talk about me behind my back, 709 00:56:51,340 --> 00:56:53,410 "and not accept me as I am. 710 00:56:53,500 --> 00:56:57,410 "Also, my family don't know. Unhappy, North London." 711 00:56:57,500 --> 00:56:59,450 Get over that river, mate. I'll make you happy. 712 00:56:59,540 --> 00:57:00,810 Shut up! 713 00:57:02,060 --> 00:57:03,610 Find page 92. 714 00:57:06,100 --> 00:57:08,450 It's the bottom right-hand corner. 715 00:57:10,980 --> 00:57:14,970 It's a pub. The 180 bus goes right to it. 716 00:57:18,100 --> 00:57:19,130 So? 717 00:57:21,060 --> 00:57:24,410 Look at that. Isn't that beautiful? 718 00:57:24,500 --> 00:57:26,650 You'd never get it through the front door. 719 00:57:26,740 --> 00:57:30,250 Yeah, but you never know if you're gonna be living somewhere else, do you? 720 00:57:30,340 --> 00:57:32,050 It's a work of art, that is. 721 00:57:32,140 --> 00:57:34,330 Claude Monet couldn't have done better. 722 00:57:34,420 --> 00:57:35,810 Get a life. 723 00:57:36,820 --> 00:57:39,130 Do you know who Claude Monet is? 724 00:57:39,660 --> 00:57:42,250 Jamie, don't make me out to be thick. 725 00:57:42,660 --> 00:57:45,530 You just remember, I won a year's supply of toilet freshener 726 00:57:45,620 --> 00:57:47,610 for making up that poem. 727 00:57:47,900 --> 00:57:50,850 That took brains and artistry, that did. 728 00:57:51,900 --> 00:57:53,330 (PHONE RINGING) 729 00:57:55,260 --> 00:57:57,410 Can you imagine it, though? 730 00:57:57,500 --> 00:58:01,200 Me and you with our feet up on a cold winter's night? 731 00:58:01,300 --> 00:58:02,290 TONY: Yeah, hold on. 732 00:58:02,380 --> 00:58:04,290 - On that. - TONY: Sandra! 733 00:58:07,060 --> 00:58:08,730 Who was he, then? 734 00:58:08,820 --> 00:58:11,170 He painted the Sixteenth Chapel. 735 00:58:12,820 --> 00:58:15,850 - And I haven't finished with you yet. - Miss Chauhan. 736 00:58:17,420 --> 00:58:19,730 - See you. - Have a cool time, kid. 737 00:58:20,820 --> 00:58:23,850 You rang to speak about my little git of a son? 738 00:58:57,140 --> 00:58:58,690 You seen Jamie? 739 01:00:08,260 --> 01:00:10,210 (PEOPLE CHEERING) 740 01:00:12,060 --> 01:00:13,930 (MAN SINGING HAVA NAGILA) 741 01:01:01,780 --> 01:01:03,890 (PEOPLE CHEERING) 742 01:01:14,740 --> 01:01:17,090 DRAG QUEEN: I love you. You're marvellous. That's lovely 743 01:01:17,180 --> 01:01:19,490 Well, Petra, I hope your leg gets better. 744 01:01:19,580 --> 01:01:21,370 She still thinks she's in Baby Jane. 745 01:01:21,460 --> 01:01:22,450 (ALL LAUGHING) 746 01:01:22,540 --> 01:01:24,450 Fancy wheeling me round the back, mate? 747 01:01:24,540 --> 01:01:26,010 (PEOPLE EXCLAIMING) 748 01:01:26,100 --> 01:01:28,850 Excuse me, what's going on here? Petra, dear? 749 01:01:30,300 --> 01:01:32,090 (QUACKING) 750 01:01:33,140 --> 01:01:34,250 Bit young for you, isn't she, dear? 751 01:01:34,340 --> 01:01:36,050 She looks like she's just out of Pampers. 752 01:01:36,140 --> 01:01:37,130 (WOMAN SHOUTING) 753 01:01:37,220 --> 01:01:40,170 Shut up, you. What's your name, petal? 754 01:01:41,220 --> 01:01:42,290 Jamie. 755 01:01:42,380 --> 01:01:43,410 - ALL: Aw! - Oh, Jamie. 756 01:01:43,500 --> 01:01:46,170 You just make me feel like I wanna get my breast out to you. 757 01:01:46,260 --> 01:01:47,770 (ALL LAUGHING) 758 01:01:48,820 --> 01:01:51,850 # I feel like Chicken Tonight # 759 01:01:53,900 --> 01:01:57,570 So, Jamie, I think I'll have two of you, 760 01:01:57,660 --> 01:01:59,650 and ten of your mate. Hello! 761 01:01:59,740 --> 01:02:01,090 (ALL LAUGHING) 762 01:02:01,180 --> 01:02:05,610 Well, lads, I've got my work cut out. I'll see you after the break. Ta-Ra. 763 01:02:09,340 --> 01:02:11,800 Oh, don't you wish your leg was better, Petra? 764 01:02:11,900 --> 01:02:15,290 See you later! Mothercare, here I come! 765 01:03:38,580 --> 01:03:41,850 - You all right, Leah? - Leah? Who's Leah? 766 01:03:53,580 --> 01:03:56,490 - Had a nice night? - Yeah. 767 01:03:59,980 --> 01:04:01,970 - Go to the pictures? - Yeah. 768 01:04:03,020 --> 01:04:05,170 - What, with Ste? - Yeah. 769 01:04:06,660 --> 01:04:08,970 This is no time for lying, Jamie. 770 01:04:09,060 --> 01:04:10,890 It's not a lie. 771 01:04:12,500 --> 01:04:15,010 You went to The Gloucester, didn't you? 772 01:04:15,540 --> 01:04:17,650 Look at me. 773 01:04:17,740 --> 01:04:19,210 I only went for a drink. 774 01:04:19,300 --> 01:04:20,690 That's where gay people go. 775 01:04:20,780 --> 01:04:23,160 Not just gay people go. Other people go. 776 01:04:23,260 --> 01:04:25,850 - Oh, people like you? - Yeah. 777 01:04:27,820 --> 01:04:30,570 - Miss Chauhan rang me today. - That old bag. 778 01:04:30,660 --> 01:04:33,120 - You never told me you kept getting hit. - Everyone gets hit. 779 01:04:33,220 --> 01:04:34,290 Oh. 780 01:04:35,420 --> 01:04:39,410 And does everyone get called a queer bent bastard and all, do they? 781 01:04:47,580 --> 01:04:49,170 - You're pissed. - No, I'm not. 782 01:04:49,260 --> 01:04:52,010 You're pissed from a bloody gay bar. 783 01:04:52,100 --> 01:04:53,240 How do you know it's gay, anyway? 784 01:04:53,340 --> 01:04:56,170 'Cause it's got a bloody great pink neon arse outside of it. 785 01:04:56,260 --> 01:04:57,930 - You been spying on me? - No. 786 01:04:58,700 --> 01:05:00,210 Someone at work saw you go in. 787 01:05:00,300 --> 01:05:02,490 Well, it don't mean I'm gay. 788 01:05:02,580 --> 01:05:04,770 They wanna mind their own business. 789 01:05:04,860 --> 01:05:07,130 - That's what I said. - What are you going on at me for, then? 790 01:05:07,220 --> 01:05:11,330 Because sometimes, Jamie, I can put two and two together and make bloody four. 791 01:05:11,420 --> 01:05:14,770 - I'm not bloody stupid, you know. - I went for a drink. Big deal. 792 01:05:14,860 --> 01:05:17,050 - Everyone in my class goes drinking. - Yeah. 793 01:05:17,140 --> 01:05:19,450 But they don't all go to the bloody Gloucester, though, do they? 794 01:05:19,540 --> 01:05:21,170 Some of them take drugs, at least I ain't doing that. 795 01:05:21,260 --> 01:05:22,810 No, I bloody hope you're not! 796 01:05:22,900 --> 01:05:26,170 Thanks a lot. Thanks a bundle. Go back to bed. 797 01:05:26,260 --> 01:05:27,580 I can't sleep, Jamie. 798 01:05:27,660 --> 01:05:29,610 Don't take it out on me. 799 01:05:30,900 --> 01:05:33,280 - Will you just talk to me, Jamie? - I'm knackered. 800 01:05:33,380 --> 01:05:37,210 Jamie. Please. Just talk to me! 801 01:05:39,660 --> 01:05:41,290 I'm your mother! 802 01:05:50,540 --> 01:05:53,000 Some things are just hard to say. 803 01:05:54,220 --> 01:05:57,570 I know. I know that. 804 01:05:58,500 --> 01:06:02,330 You think I'm too young. You think it's just a phase. 805 01:06:02,420 --> 01:06:04,980 You think I'm gonna catch AIDS and everything. 806 01:06:08,940 --> 01:06:11,450 You know a lot about me, don't you? 807 01:06:19,660 --> 01:06:21,410 Don't cry. 808 01:06:24,820 --> 01:06:27,170 (SHUSHING) 809 01:06:27,260 --> 01:06:28,770 It's all right. 810 01:06:28,860 --> 01:06:30,570 (SOBBING) 811 01:06:46,580 --> 01:06:50,460 I'm not gonna put you out in the morning like an empty bottle. 812 01:07:05,580 --> 01:07:07,130 There's me, going to bed at night worried, 813 01:07:07,220 --> 01:07:09,570 'cause you had to share a bed with Ste. 814 01:07:10,420 --> 01:07:12,570 And all the time you were... 815 01:07:13,860 --> 01:07:16,210 You were doing a 70 minus one. 816 01:07:22,900 --> 01:07:26,730 I like the lad, Jamie, but he hasn't seen any life. 817 01:07:27,740 --> 01:07:29,730 - He's good to me. - Is he? 818 01:07:31,500 --> 01:07:32,610 Yeah. 819 01:07:39,820 --> 01:07:42,570 - What have you done now? - Nothing. 820 01:07:42,660 --> 01:07:44,890 Then why's she so upset? 821 01:07:44,980 --> 01:07:48,570 'Cause I'm a queer. A bender, a poofter, a knobshiner! 822 01:07:48,660 --> 01:07:50,570 Brown hatter! Shirtflaplifter! 823 01:07:50,660 --> 01:07:52,570 I... I get the picture. 824 01:07:54,180 --> 01:07:56,490 Leave me alone. 825 01:07:56,580 --> 01:08:00,050 - And she knows this? - No, I thought I'd tell you first. 826 01:08:01,900 --> 01:08:05,170 This is... It's... 827 01:08:08,140 --> 01:08:09,490 It's cool. 828 01:08:13,580 --> 01:08:15,170 Good night, kiddo. 829 01:09:06,860 --> 01:09:08,180 He was... 830 01:09:10,420 --> 01:09:13,370 He was the most beautiful baby in Bermondsey. 831 01:09:17,580 --> 01:09:20,410 I used to push him around in a little frilly hat, 832 01:09:20,500 --> 01:09:23,490 in a big blue pram called "Queen of the Road". 833 01:09:24,460 --> 01:09:26,530 None of that's changed. 834 01:09:28,300 --> 01:09:29,690 (SNIFFLING) 835 01:09:33,820 --> 01:09:36,570 - You're fighting it, hon. - Fighting? 836 01:09:36,660 --> 01:09:39,120 I've been fighting all my life. 837 01:09:40,220 --> 01:09:42,810 Kids picking on him. I was there. 838 01:09:42,900 --> 01:09:46,050 Council saying bollocks to benefit, I was there. 839 01:09:46,820 --> 01:09:49,200 When I had 3p in my purse and an empty fridge, 840 01:09:49,300 --> 01:09:53,290 I went robbing for that boy, so don't talk to me about fighting! 841 01:09:54,500 --> 01:09:58,890 You? What have you ever had to fight for in your life? 842 01:10:00,780 --> 01:10:04,010 (CREEQUE ALLEY PLAYING ON STEREO) 843 01:10:05,580 --> 01:10:09,330 Thank you. Thank you to all members of the Academy. 844 01:10:09,420 --> 01:10:11,800 This award means so much to me. 845 01:10:11,900 --> 01:10:15,170 I've never won anything in my life before. 846 01:10:15,260 --> 01:10:18,330 I'd like to thank my manager and my band, 847 01:10:18,420 --> 01:10:22,120 but most of all I'd like to thank one very special person. 848 01:10:22,220 --> 01:10:26,170 - What the... - The woman from whom all energy flows. 849 01:10:26,260 --> 01:10:29,330 This award is as much hers as mine. 850 01:10:29,420 --> 01:10:33,810 The woman who gives me so much inspiration. 851 01:10:34,340 --> 01:10:36,930 - Let's hear it for her. Mama San. - Leah. 852 01:10:37,020 --> 01:10:39,580 - People say to me, they say... - Leah, are you drunk? 853 01:10:39,660 --> 01:10:40,980 "Where do you get your energy from?" 854 01:10:41,060 --> 01:10:42,890 Leah, it's 2:00 in the morning. 855 01:10:42,980 --> 01:10:44,930 - And I say, "Hey..." - Has she taken something? 856 01:10:45,020 --> 01:10:46,850 -"Mama San." - Is your mother in? 857 01:10:46,940 --> 01:10:51,010 Mama San, get on down, honey. Your vibes are shooting through me now. 858 01:10:51,100 --> 01:10:52,320 Is she working nights? 859 01:10:52,420 --> 01:10:55,410 Don't ever let the light leave you, Mama San. 860 01:10:56,340 --> 01:10:59,890 Rose! Leah, get your keys out. Hurry up. 861 01:10:59,980 --> 01:11:01,890 Have you taken, like, a trip, you know? 862 01:11:01,980 --> 01:11:05,450 Jamie! Leah, let me have your keys, please. 863 01:11:05,540 --> 01:11:06,650 TONY: Don't shout at her. 864 01:11:06,740 --> 01:11:09,200 - You're giving me bad vibes, Mama. - She's on something. 865 01:11:09,300 --> 01:11:10,520 Jamie! 866 01:11:11,660 --> 01:11:14,890 You're an old man. I don't like old men. 867 01:11:14,980 --> 01:11:16,490 That's cool. It's no problem. 868 01:11:16,580 --> 01:11:19,410 Well, it is a problem, actually, Tony, don't pander to her. 869 01:11:19,500 --> 01:11:21,570 - What's going on? - Rose! 870 01:11:21,660 --> 01:11:24,370 I saw a video about Woodstock once. 871 01:11:25,980 --> 01:11:29,410 Leah, get in here and turn your bloody music down! 872 01:11:30,900 --> 01:11:32,250 SANDRA: Oh, my God! Tony! TONY: Leah, what the... 873 01:11:32,340 --> 01:11:34,090 Tony, get her down. 874 01:11:34,900 --> 01:11:38,890 Leah. Leah, have you taken, like, a trip, you know? 875 01:11:40,060 --> 01:11:41,410 - Get down, you silly cow. - Sandra! 876 01:11:41,500 --> 01:11:43,810 Here, body language, Tony? 877 01:11:43,900 --> 01:11:46,810 - Hey, you, pack it in, will you? - Oi, arsehole! Fuck off! 878 01:11:46,900 --> 01:11:48,220 There's no need for that, you old whore! 879 01:11:48,300 --> 01:11:49,490 Oh, Jamie, help us! 880 01:11:49,580 --> 01:11:51,960 - Betty, it's them again! - I can see that. 881 01:11:52,060 --> 01:11:54,700 TONY: Right. MAN: Fucking turn it down! 882 01:11:55,420 --> 01:11:57,880 How am I supposed to sleep with that row going on? 883 01:11:57,980 --> 01:12:00,410 It's all right, babes, you're safe. 884 01:12:00,500 --> 01:12:02,570 I'll be glad to get off this bloody estate. 885 01:12:02,660 --> 01:12:03,850 What? 886 01:12:04,900 --> 01:12:07,250 I've been offered a job, if you must know. 887 01:12:07,860 --> 01:12:12,170 Temporary licensee in a pub in Rotherhithe. Nice little flat above it. 888 01:12:12,420 --> 01:12:14,170 Thanks for telling me. 889 01:12:14,260 --> 01:12:15,450 Snap! 890 01:12:17,900 --> 01:12:19,890 - TONY: Leah? - Oh, leave the silly cow. 891 01:12:19,980 --> 01:12:21,730 We can't just... 892 01:12:21,820 --> 01:12:23,890 Tony. Tony! 893 01:12:29,740 --> 01:12:31,610 Right, Jamie, indoors. 894 01:12:32,300 --> 01:12:34,370 Ste, she knows. 895 01:12:35,380 --> 01:12:37,330 - My mum knows. - Why'd you have to go and grass? 896 01:12:37,420 --> 01:12:39,650 - I never. - Well, how comes she knows? 897 01:12:39,740 --> 01:12:42,930 Because she never came down with the last shower. 898 01:12:49,660 --> 01:12:51,650 Jamie, get him an hanky. 899 01:12:51,740 --> 01:12:54,250 There's a box of autumnal shades by me bed. 900 01:12:54,700 --> 01:12:56,050 (SNIFFLING) 901 01:13:02,860 --> 01:13:04,410 (HORN HONKING) 902 01:13:07,580 --> 01:13:10,530 Leah! Leah! 903 01:13:11,900 --> 01:13:13,370 (CARS HONKING) 904 01:13:13,980 --> 01:13:15,370 Mama Cass! 905 01:13:23,100 --> 01:13:25,210 I don't believe in secrets. 906 01:13:26,580 --> 01:13:29,410 I like people to be straight up and honest. 907 01:13:30,300 --> 01:13:32,250 But I'm no fool. 908 01:13:32,340 --> 01:13:34,490 You think I want these flats infamous for child murder? 909 01:13:34,580 --> 01:13:35,970 No. So I won't be telling your dad. 910 01:13:36,060 --> 01:13:37,890 He'd kill me. 911 01:13:37,980 --> 01:13:39,970 - Yeah, I just said that. - No, he would! 912 01:13:40,060 --> 01:13:42,810 Yeah, I think we've established that already, actually, Ste. 913 01:13:42,900 --> 01:13:43,930 They all would. All of them. 914 01:13:44,020 --> 01:13:46,890 I'll bloody kill you in a minute if you don't stop snivelling and shut up! 915 01:13:46,980 --> 01:13:48,330 (SOBBING) 916 01:13:54,780 --> 01:13:58,210 You're a good lad, and that's what counts. 917 01:14:00,540 --> 01:14:02,570 And somewhere... 918 01:14:03,580 --> 01:14:05,930 you'll find people that won't wanna kill you. 919 01:14:06,020 --> 01:14:07,970 No, I won't. 920 01:14:08,380 --> 01:14:10,490 - You found The Gloucester. - I hate it. 921 01:14:10,580 --> 01:14:14,410 - Well, somewhere else, then! Shut up! - There ain't nowhere else. 922 01:14:17,420 --> 01:14:19,370 There is, actually, Ste. 923 01:14:21,300 --> 01:14:24,570 There's an island in the Mediterranean called Lesbian, 924 01:14:24,660 --> 01:14:28,650 and all its inhabitants are dykes, so I think you got your eye wiped there. 925 01:14:32,740 --> 01:14:34,610 Now wipe them properly. 926 01:14:51,580 --> 01:14:54,450 - Fuck me. - No, I'll have none of that here. 927 01:14:57,420 --> 01:14:59,450 I'm going to bed. 928 01:15:02,820 --> 01:15:06,490 Right, Sandra. Night, Sandra. Cheers, Sandra. 929 01:15:07,340 --> 01:15:10,530 Yeah, that's me name, Ste. Don't wear it out, eh? 930 01:16:53,140 --> 01:16:55,850 LEAH: I wish I was the one that was going away. 931 01:16:55,940 --> 01:16:57,850 Nothing ever happens round here. 932 01:16:57,940 --> 01:17:01,640 I gets up in the morning, bake my face in half a ton of slap, 933 01:17:01,740 --> 01:17:05,330 tong my hair with yesterday's lacquer, that's it. 934 01:17:05,420 --> 01:17:07,850 It's the same every bleeding day. 935 01:17:08,580 --> 01:17:11,010 There's fuck all to look forward to. 936 01:17:11,100 --> 01:17:13,970 - What about your new school? - Fell through. 937 01:17:15,340 --> 01:17:17,800 - Do you wanna come to The Gloucester? - Do what? 938 01:17:17,900 --> 01:17:19,250 Gay pub. 939 01:17:19,340 --> 01:17:21,690 - Don't know any gay blokes. - Yes, you do. 940 01:17:21,980 --> 01:17:23,730 - Yeah? - Yeah. 941 01:17:26,580 --> 01:17:29,170 - There'll be plenty of men. - Yeah. 942 01:17:29,260 --> 01:17:31,250 And they all dance backwards and never get married. 943 01:17:31,340 --> 01:17:33,250 (BOTH LAUGHING) 944 01:17:35,900 --> 01:17:37,490 See, I told you. 945 01:17:38,100 --> 01:17:39,890 You're going to Woolwich, ain't you? 946 01:17:39,980 --> 01:17:41,570 - What? - Yeah. 947 01:17:41,660 --> 01:17:43,050 Pub crawl, then Stars nightclub. 948 01:17:43,140 --> 01:17:44,130 (CHUCKLING) 949 01:17:44,220 --> 01:17:46,250 You'll pull dressed like that. 950 01:17:48,660 --> 01:17:51,370 Why don't you come down The Gloucester with us? 951 01:17:55,580 --> 01:17:57,650 Ring the other girls, tell them you'll meet them later. 952 01:17:57,740 --> 01:17:59,060 Jamie. 953 01:17:59,140 --> 01:18:02,130 You don't know how to enjoy yourself, do you? 954 01:18:03,900 --> 01:18:06,730 There's a male stripper tonight as well. 955 01:18:08,740 --> 01:18:10,970 (MAN CHATTERING ON TV) 956 01:18:12,380 --> 01:18:14,410 - Louise. - Yeah? 957 01:18:16,340 --> 01:18:18,610 I will never have grandchildren. 958 01:18:20,340 --> 01:18:21,730 Aw. 959 01:18:28,660 --> 01:18:30,570 Don't suppose you've got any jobs in your new pub? 960 01:18:30,660 --> 01:18:31,690 No. 961 01:18:31,780 --> 01:18:35,770 But if I ever do turn it into a brothel, I'll get back to you, okay? 962 01:18:36,500 --> 01:18:38,730 Well, gotta get in. Get ready. 963 01:18:39,260 --> 01:18:41,770 Going out with Ste and Jamie tonight. 964 01:18:42,860 --> 01:18:43,930 The Gloucester? 965 01:18:44,020 --> 01:18:47,650 Yeah. I intend to find myself a nice dyke tonight. 966 01:18:48,500 --> 01:18:51,490 'Cause I'm telling you, I'm through with men. 967 01:19:01,100 --> 01:19:03,890 - Well, if I had a camera now. - What? 968 01:19:05,220 --> 01:19:06,930 Well, I'd take your picture. 969 01:19:07,020 --> 01:19:08,570 Tony, what are you doing? 970 01:19:08,660 --> 01:19:10,330 Can't keep away from you, babes. 971 01:19:10,420 --> 01:19:12,730 I told you, I'm going out with the girls from work. 972 01:19:12,820 --> 01:19:13,930 Thought I could tag along. 973 01:19:14,020 --> 01:19:16,330 It's a girls' night out. You'll only be bored. 974 01:19:16,420 --> 01:19:19,130 - I want to celebrate, too. - Yeah, I know, but I told you. I was... 975 01:19:19,220 --> 01:19:20,690 They'd mind? 976 01:19:21,340 --> 01:19:22,660 I'll mind. 977 01:19:25,060 --> 01:19:27,770 How about one little kiss to send me on my way? 978 01:19:27,860 --> 01:19:29,210 Something to think of till tomorrow. 979 01:19:29,300 --> 01:19:30,890 Stop it. 980 01:19:32,300 --> 01:19:34,090 Well, I'll ring you. 981 01:19:38,580 --> 01:19:41,370 - Tony... - Look, when's your next night off? 982 01:19:42,260 --> 01:19:43,330 No. 983 01:19:44,940 --> 01:19:47,290 No, Tony. I think you'd better go. 984 01:19:48,500 --> 01:19:52,490 Here, stick that down the chute for us, will you? 985 01:20:14,780 --> 01:20:16,330 (LIVELY MUSIC ON TV) 986 01:20:16,420 --> 01:20:18,610 - What you doing? - Staying in. 987 01:20:38,580 --> 01:20:40,450 - Laters. - Yeah. 988 01:20:55,900 --> 01:20:58,730 You'll be seduced by a lesbian, Leah. 989 01:20:58,820 --> 01:21:01,410 Why don't you come to bingo with me? 990 01:21:02,580 --> 01:21:05,810 But don't you see, Mum? I am a lesbian. 991 01:21:08,780 --> 01:21:10,100 (LAUGHING) 992 01:21:14,580 --> 01:21:15,720 Oh, no. 993 01:21:19,940 --> 01:21:22,530 (DREAM A LITTLE DREAM OF ME PLAYING) 994 01:21:27,580 --> 01:21:29,890 - Anyone about? - Nah. 995 01:21:30,980 --> 01:21:32,090 (BANGING) 996 01:21:37,900 --> 01:21:39,410 Dance with me. 997 01:22:38,980 --> 01:22:41,890 Here, Leah, give us a little drag on that. 998 01:22:53,100 --> 01:22:54,610 Come on, then. 999 01:23:19,900 --> 01:23:21,810 - Here, Ste! - What? 1000 01:23:21,900 --> 01:23:23,650 Imagine your dad's face. 1001 01:23:23,740 --> 01:23:25,060 (LAUGHING) 1002 01:23:33,580 --> 01:23:35,330 - Here, Leah. - What? 1003 01:23:35,420 --> 01:23:36,810 What's this dyke gonna be like? 1004 01:23:36,900 --> 01:23:39,010 Ah, big and butch. 1005 01:23:39,980 --> 01:23:42,490 - What colour eyes? - Green. 1006 01:23:42,580 --> 01:23:44,810 - Tall? - I'll have to look up. 1007 01:23:44,900 --> 01:23:46,770 - Nice. - Yeah. 1008 09:59:59,999 --> 09:59:59,999 What about? 1009 09:59:59,999 --> 09:59:59,999 Five minutes.