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00:00:07,200 --> 00:00:09,858
Welcome to the quarterly
report with yours truly,
2
00:00:10,790 --> 00:00:11,997
me.
3
00:00:12,245 --> 00:00:14,280
All right. So investments by sector...
4
00:00:14,321 --> 00:00:16,322
Things are going really great at work.
5
00:00:16,323 --> 00:00:19,463
I feel like I finally found
what I'm meant to do in life.
6
00:00:19,464 --> 00:00:21,177
Jimmy.
7
00:00:21,188 --> 00:00:23,535
- Does anyone ever call you Big Red?
- No.
8
00:00:23,546 --> 00:00:27,687
And it feels really great to
finally be, you know, appreciated.
9
00:00:29,578 --> 00:00:30,644
Let's go.
10
00:00:30,959 --> 00:00:31,994
- Out.
- Out.
11
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- Oh!
- Fuck!
12
00:00:36,688 --> 00:00:39,449
I finally feel like I belong somewhere.
13
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Everything is coming up Guillermo.
14
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Fuck you too.
15
00:00:43,770 --> 00:00:46,083
Okay. All my best to Patrice. Bye.
16
00:00:46,813 --> 00:00:49,055
- Dude, that move you made on Salazar.
- Mmm.
17
00:00:49,412 --> 00:00:51,655
Holy shit. How did you know
that we should short that?
18
00:00:51,945 --> 00:00:53,238
You know someone over there?
19
00:00:53,249 --> 00:00:55,210
Just did my research. Just
leave it at that.
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00:00:55,221 --> 00:00:56,704
You know what I say,
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00:00:56,715 --> 00:00:58,854
you do whatever you can
get away with, right?
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And don't use that.
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That's the kinda shit that we
look for in our full-time analyst.
24
00:01:03,405 --> 00:01:05,452
Mr. Nelson was saying he's very pleased
25
00:01:05,463 --> 00:01:06,486
- with your work.
- What?
26
00:01:06,497 --> 00:01:08,187
You could be moving
up here real quick, G.
27
00:01:08,394 --> 00:01:10,118
- Oh.
- In fact,
28
00:01:10,129 --> 00:01:11,923
tomorrow night, we should
have a little rager here
29
00:01:12,231 --> 00:01:13,956
and toast to your badass self.
30
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Think about preppin' a speech
31
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'cause I got something
special planned for you
32
00:01:16,832 --> 00:01:18,246
that you are gonna love.
33
00:01:18,247 --> 00:01:19,869
Invite some friends, huh?
34
00:01:19,870 --> 00:01:21,229
- Yeah.
- You do have friends, don't ya?
35
00:01:21,240 --> 00:01:25,002
- Yeah. Okay. I got tons of friends.
- Cool, I wanna meet 'em!
36
00:01:25,358 --> 00:01:27,192
So I'll be making a speech
37
00:01:27,203 --> 00:01:30,344
and you would all be
attending as my friends.
38
00:01:30,643 --> 00:01:32,989
Well, friends as in your
friends or someone else's?
39
00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:34,358
Someone else's feels better.
40
00:01:34,369 --> 00:01:38,338
Ah, I would be attending as a
valued Cannon Capital employee,
41
00:01:38,810 --> 00:01:40,148
not your friend.
42
00:01:40,159 --> 00:01:42,229
Okay, you know what? Forget
it. Forget I even asked.
43
00:01:42,240 --> 00:01:45,553
Nonsense. I will also be
attending as a former employee.
44
00:01:45,712 --> 00:01:47,713
And don't worry, I
will not be "triggered"
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00:01:47,714 --> 00:01:51,648
by returning to the corridors
I once kept so very tidy
46
00:01:51,649 --> 00:01:53,581
as chief supreme janitor.
47
00:01:53,582 --> 00:01:55,616
I think you were just a regular janitor.
48
00:01:55,627 --> 00:01:59,458
And I too shall attend, for your
soiree shall be the perfect debut
49
00:01:59,657 --> 00:02:03,004
- for my completed Cravensworth's Monster.
- Oh.
50
00:02:03,005 --> 00:02:04,764
It's been a rocky road,
but as you can see,
51
00:02:04,765 --> 00:02:06,455
he's quite the handsome chap.
52
00:02:06,456 --> 00:02:08,423
And far smarter than Nandor.
53
00:02:08,424 --> 00:02:09,804
- What the fuck?
- Yeah.
54
00:02:09,805 --> 00:02:11,219
I don't know, Laszlo. I mean,
55
00:02:11,220 --> 00:02:14,084
the last time we took
him around other people,
56
00:02:14,085 --> 00:02:16,845
he popped Jerry's head
like a swollen tick.
57
00:02:16,846 --> 00:02:19,192
Jerry did pretty much deserve that.
58
00:02:19,360 --> 00:02:20,775
And he's promised not to do it again.
59
00:02:20,890 --> 00:02:22,264
Stand up. Come round here.
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00:02:22,265 --> 00:02:24,266
If you're going
to insist on bringing him,
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00:02:24,267 --> 00:02:26,406
he simply must wear trousers.
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00:02:26,899 --> 00:02:29,074
Not tonight, Josephine.
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00:02:59,797 --> 00:03:04,797
- Synced and corrected by naFraC -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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All right, it's official.
65
00:03:06,664 --> 00:03:08,285
You are swagged out.
66
00:03:08,296 --> 00:03:10,485
- Will Laszlo like?
- Do you like?
67
00:03:10,586 --> 00:03:13,796
Laszlo master. What would Laszlo like?
68
00:03:14,763 --> 00:03:19,352
Okay. You know, you and I don't
have to go to this party, Monster.
69
00:03:19,460 --> 00:03:24,292
I mean, we could stay home and
binge watch a season of USOT.
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00:03:24,642 --> 00:03:25,917
United States of Tara.
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00:03:25,928 --> 00:03:28,676
No. Laszlo say we go party.
72
00:03:28,677 --> 00:03:30,125
But is that what you want?
73
00:03:30,126 --> 00:03:31,782
Want make Laszlo proud.
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00:03:31,783 --> 00:03:33,577
Do you want to make me proud?
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00:03:33,578 --> 00:03:34,855
Laszlo master.
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00:03:35,886 --> 00:03:36,921
Yeah, all right.
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00:03:38,756 --> 00:03:41,447
- Hey you, guys.
- Oh!
78
00:03:41,448 --> 00:03:43,552
Today everyone is talking
about the man of the hour.
79
00:03:43,553 --> 00:03:46,314
Whatever you heard, don't
believe it. None of it's true.
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00:03:46,315 --> 00:03:48,557
Come on! We heard the
Salazar short was all you.
81
00:03:48,558 --> 00:03:51,077
Uh... Yeah, that part is
true. You can believe it.
82
00:03:51,078 --> 00:03:53,149
- I believe 'em. I'm a believer.
- Oh, yep!
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00:03:53,909 --> 00:03:56,151
Oh. Excuse me for a moment. You made it!
84
00:03:56,152 --> 00:03:58,153
- Look at this! It's the friends!
- Yeah.
85
00:03:58,154 --> 00:03:59,707
- They're real. Pinch me.
- Pinch.
86
00:04:00,096 --> 00:04:01,156
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
87
00:04:01,157 --> 00:04:03,365
- Sorry.
- Don't mind the cameras here.
88
00:04:03,366 --> 00:04:05,195
We're making a little
promotional documentary
89
00:04:05,196 --> 00:04:08,750
about Cannon Capital in, what
we like to call, the Cannon way.
90
00:04:08,751 --> 00:04:10,752
- So you'll get used to 'em.
- Jordan.
91
00:04:10,753 --> 00:04:12,478
Ah. Yes, Nan... Nancy?
92
00:04:12,479 --> 00:04:14,583
- Yeah.
- Leave it with me.
93
00:04:14,584 --> 00:04:18,898
I say my perfectly normal
friend here needs to take a piss.
94
00:04:19,009 --> 00:04:21,183
- Ah.
- Where would he do that?
95
00:04:21,194 --> 00:04:22,697
Toilet now.
96
00:04:22,708 --> 00:04:25,399
- Uh, just down the hall on the left.
- Thanking you. Come on.
97
00:04:25,595 --> 00:04:27,700
Come on. It's to the left.
98
00:04:27,701 --> 00:04:29,100
Maybe I'm trippin' out here,
99
00:04:29,111 --> 00:04:31,354
but isn't that the guy that beat the
fuckin' shit out of you? Bald guy?
100
00:04:31,809 --> 00:04:33,982
- What? I don't think so.
- Looks like him.
101
00:04:33,983 --> 00:04:36,571
- Mmm. Mm-hmm.
- And... Hey, you.
102
00:04:36,572 --> 00:04:37,952
Weren't you a janitor here?
103
00:04:37,953 --> 00:04:41,750
Ha. I get that a lot.
No, that was, um, uh...
104
00:04:42,543 --> 00:04:45,960
my slow-witted brother
who looks a lot like me,
105
00:04:45,961 --> 00:04:48,100
but he's a completely different guy.
106
00:04:48,101 --> 00:04:49,584
- Well, small world, huh?
- Yeah.
107
00:04:49,585 --> 00:04:51,172
But, listen. Sorry we had
to let your brother go.
108
00:04:51,173 --> 00:04:53,243
It just wasn't a good
culture fit, you know?
109
00:04:53,913 --> 00:04:55,062
Sure, sure.
110
00:04:55,073 --> 00:04:58,282
I guess he just didn't
make the grade, so...
111
00:04:58,401 --> 00:05:00,024
I'm glad I'm not that guy.
112
00:05:01,079 --> 00:05:03,598
You tellin' me. So, what do you do?
113
00:05:03,599 --> 00:05:06,014
I used to command armies
in the Middle East.
114
00:05:06,015 --> 00:05:07,188
- Top secret stuff.
- Sure. Yes.
115
00:05:07,189 --> 00:05:08,810
Like Mossad?
116
00:05:08,811 --> 00:05:11,882
- Gesundheit.
- Guillermo, shots! Come on.
117
00:05:11,883 --> 00:05:13,332
- Oh, no.
- You're taking two shots!
118
00:05:13,333 --> 00:05:15,230
- He's taking some shots!
- Set him up, Jimmy.
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00:05:15,231 --> 00:05:17,923
Okay. But I'll be right back.
I'll be right back though.
120
00:05:17,924 --> 00:05:19,261
So how do you know Guillermo?
121
00:05:19,272 --> 00:05:24,138
Oh, he used to be my
right-hand man for many years.
122
00:05:24,309 --> 00:05:26,172
Man, I wish I had
four Guillermos, right?
123
00:05:26,173 --> 00:05:28,278
Really lightened my load around here.
124
00:05:28,279 --> 00:05:30,073
I wish I had two Guillermos.
125
00:05:30,074 --> 00:05:32,765
Then you could have
one. I would have one.
126
00:05:32,766 --> 00:05:37,252
And then the two Guillermos could
become friends or even lovers.
127
00:05:37,253 --> 00:05:40,255
And I could say like, "Hey,
Guillermo, go fuck yourself."
128
00:05:40,256 --> 00:05:42,223
And then he could do that.
129
00:05:42,224 --> 00:05:43,259
Okay, well...
130
00:05:44,502 --> 00:05:46,227
- Cut that.
- Nice meeting you.
131
00:05:46,228 --> 00:05:47,885
- There he is.
- Oh, yeah.
132
00:05:53,235 --> 00:05:56,272
No. I cannot wait
to start working with you.
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00:05:56,894 --> 00:05:57,963
All right. Take care.
134
00:05:57,964 --> 00:05:59,619
No, you take care.
135
00:05:59,620 --> 00:06:01,864
How about we both take care?
Stop it. Okay. Bye.
136
00:06:05,902 --> 00:06:06,903
What?
137
00:06:06,904 --> 00:06:10,535
I have just been offered
an incredible new job.
138
00:06:10,546 --> 00:06:12,341
But is Guillermo gonna be okay without
139
00:06:12,575 --> 00:06:13,875
you watching over him the whole time?
140
00:06:14,208 --> 00:06:15,477
- Doing what?
- Remember?
141
00:06:15,488 --> 00:06:17,568
The reason you started working
here in the first place?
142
00:06:17,569 --> 00:06:21,296
Oh, right! I guess I
completely forgot about that.
143
00:06:21,674 --> 00:06:22,963
Oh, well. Fuck it.
144
00:06:22,974 --> 00:06:24,782
He's doing fine, isn't he?
145
00:06:24,783 --> 00:06:27,337
I certainly am.
146
00:06:27,338 --> 00:06:30,444
I must admit, I am sad to
be leaving Cannon Capital.
147
00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:34,070
I never quite figured out
what it is we actually do here.
148
00:06:34,777 --> 00:06:36,019
Lamps?
149
00:06:36,123 --> 00:06:39,781
Making and/or selling
really enormous lamps?
150
00:06:39,902 --> 00:06:41,799
But... there's a lot more work
151
00:06:41,800 --> 00:06:43,940
to be done before I can truly celebrate.
152
00:06:43,941 --> 00:06:47,150
Unfortunately, when you are
quitting your job in human world,
153
00:06:47,151 --> 00:06:50,256
you have to burn all of your
bridges at your workplace.
154
00:06:50,748 --> 00:06:53,328
It is a very mysterious human custom.
155
00:06:53,329 --> 00:06:55,330
I think that they do it
so that their coworkers
156
00:06:55,331 --> 00:06:58,503
that they leave behind
will not miss them so much.
157
00:06:58,514 --> 00:07:00,542
It's sort of sweet.
158
00:07:00,543 --> 00:07:02,924
I do not fully
understand this tradition,
159
00:07:02,925 --> 00:07:05,237
but as they say in
ancient Callipraxos...
160
00:07:08,517 --> 00:07:11,658
Which means "fuck up as
much shit as possible."
161
00:07:14,799 --> 00:07:17,077
Yeah, they were a really
destructive society.
162
00:07:21,495 --> 00:07:22,737
What's he saying?
163
00:07:22,738 --> 00:07:24,982
- It's Latin, you pricks.
- I knew that.
164
00:07:25,568 --> 00:07:27,569
Hey, why don't we take a break
165
00:07:27,570 --> 00:07:29,847
and see how many pizza rolls
we can get in your mouth?
166
00:07:29,848 --> 00:07:31,677
Laszlo happy?
167
00:07:31,678 --> 00:07:34,235
No. Recite pi to the fiftieth point.
168
00:07:34,246 --> 00:07:38,373
3.1416?
169
00:07:38,374 --> 00:07:40,479
Five! Five!
170
00:07:41,757 --> 00:07:44,169
What are you doing?
He's not having any fun.
171
00:07:44,180 --> 00:07:46,071
Of course he is. He's
having a great time.
172
00:07:46,072 --> 00:07:48,525
- He's the life of the party.
- No, he's not.
173
00:07:48,536 --> 00:07:50,985
And I don't appreciate you trotting
him out like some dancing bear.
174
00:07:51,732 --> 00:07:54,113
Well, I don't give a
monkey's what you appreciate.
175
00:07:54,114 --> 00:07:55,735
He's as happy as a horse.
176
00:07:55,736 --> 00:07:58,048
I suggest you go and
get yourself a cocktail.
177
00:07:58,049 --> 00:08:00,223
You get yourself a cocktail.
178
00:08:00,224 --> 00:08:01,983
- Seven.
- Did he get it?
179
00:08:01,984 --> 00:08:03,364
- Yes.
- Of course he did.
180
00:08:03,365 --> 00:08:05,582
He's the best, that's
why. Come out here.
181
00:08:05,593 --> 00:08:07,713
Gather around, everyone.
I want you to watch this.
182
00:08:07,714 --> 00:08:09,853
That's it. Out you
come. Fast as you can.
183
00:08:09,854 --> 00:08:11,441
Turn the music on.
184
00:08:11,442 --> 00:08:13,191
He likes this one.
185
00:08:13,202 --> 00:08:16,998
I mean, he's no Patrick
Swayze, but he can dance.
186
00:08:16,999 --> 00:08:18,586
Pretty good, right? That's it.
187
00:08:18,587 --> 00:08:20,001
I stop now?
188
00:08:20,002 --> 00:08:21,969
No, no. You stop when
I damn well tell you.
189
00:08:21,970 --> 00:08:23,799
He never gets tired. He
can do that all night.
190
00:08:25,073 --> 00:08:27,798
Oh, Cathy. I've been
meaning to tell you,
191
00:08:27,809 --> 00:08:30,815
your spreadsheets are
absolute hogshit, girlie.
192
00:08:31,402 --> 00:08:34,648
It's, like, are you numerically
demented or something?
193
00:08:34,659 --> 00:08:37,335
And Brock, your fiancée
has been cheating
194
00:08:37,345 --> 00:08:39,572
on you with your brother for ages.
195
00:08:39,573 --> 00:08:41,679
I'm gonna miss you both so much.
196
00:08:42,369 --> 00:08:43,405
Shit.
197
00:08:43,804 --> 00:08:45,253
Oh, hi. Have you seen Jordan?
198
00:08:45,604 --> 00:08:47,329
Someone broke the glass
in conference room B.
199
00:08:47,340 --> 00:08:49,997
- Lisa, my favorite.
- Oh, come on.
200
00:08:49,998 --> 00:08:52,482
- Your voice is incredibly deep...
- Yes.
201
00:08:52,483 --> 00:08:54,346
... and nasal and grating.
202
00:08:54,347 --> 00:08:55,920
And your whole vibe,
203
00:08:55,931 --> 00:08:58,899
it's like you crave love 'cause
you never had it as a child,
204
00:08:59,076 --> 00:09:00,352
like, where were your parents?
205
00:09:00,353 --> 00:09:01,940
You're really hard to be around.
206
00:09:04,426 --> 00:09:05,909
I said I wouldn't cry!
207
00:09:06,140 --> 00:09:07,244
That's not your desk.
208
00:09:07,255 --> 00:09:08,946
Not anymore. It's not.
209
00:09:09,396 --> 00:09:11,018
Very cool.
210
00:09:11,019 --> 00:09:13,089
A water closet in your office?
211
00:09:13,090 --> 00:09:14,952
- Oh, yeah.
- You ever get tempted to, you know,
212
00:09:14,953 --> 00:09:16,920
just sit at your desk
213
00:09:16,921 --> 00:09:19,578
and whip it out and see if you
can piss right into the toilet?
214
00:09:19,579 --> 00:09:21,407
No, but I'll have to give that a try.
215
00:09:21,408 --> 00:09:23,375
We don't need to be talking
about piss in front of my boss.
216
00:09:23,376 --> 00:09:24,893
Ease up, G.
217
00:09:24,894 --> 00:09:26,688
I'm always telling Guillermo
that he works too hard.
218
00:09:26,689 --> 00:09:28,725
He's always here. I gotta
watch out for this guy.
219
00:09:28,726 --> 00:09:31,038
Otherwise, one day, it'll
be him behind this desk,
220
00:09:31,285 --> 00:09:32,556
- right?
- No. No.
221
00:09:32,557 --> 00:09:35,525
My mini me. My mentee.
My right-hand man.
222
00:09:35,526 --> 00:09:37,458
He used to do a similar thing for me.
223
00:09:37,459 --> 00:09:39,149
- We called it shit work.
- Ah.
224
00:09:39,370 --> 00:09:41,338
- Same, same.
- No, not the same.
225
00:09:41,842 --> 00:09:44,051
For one, I actually get
something from working here.
226
00:09:45,495 --> 00:09:48,434
Well... why don't we
take a little breath here?
227
00:09:48,435 --> 00:09:50,712
- Yeah.
- How about you go get me a beer?
228
00:09:50,713 --> 00:09:52,059
- Get yourself some too.
- Got it, boss.
229
00:09:52,326 --> 00:09:53,533
And one for me.
230
00:09:53,862 --> 00:09:55,717
Really? You want a beer too?
231
00:09:55,889 --> 00:09:58,237
Yes, Guillermo. I would like a beer
232
00:09:59,188 --> 00:10:00,671
on the rocks.
233
00:10:00,682 --> 00:10:02,855
- Just go get the beers.
- Yeah.
234
00:10:02,866 --> 00:10:05,002
It's always a fucking
discussion with this guy.
235
00:10:05,003 --> 00:10:08,489
It was the same when he worked
for me, you know? So argumentative.
236
00:10:08,490 --> 00:10:09,973
- Mm-hmm.
- Always talking back
237
00:10:09,974 --> 00:10:12,113
like some kind of needy child.
238
00:10:12,114 --> 00:10:14,667
Exactly. Just,
like, do what I fucking say.
239
00:10:14,668 --> 00:10:16,255
Yes, like a servant.
240
00:10:16,256 --> 00:10:18,119
Those were your words, not mine.
241
00:10:18,120 --> 00:10:20,305
Sure. Sure.
242
00:10:20,316 --> 00:10:25,009
But you do value Guillermo
as a part of the team, right?
243
00:10:25,265 --> 00:10:28,474
Let me tell you something.
You gotta have at least one guy
244
00:10:28,475 --> 00:10:30,821
who would do anything to make you happy.
245
00:10:30,822 --> 00:10:32,892
Neediness is a great motivator.
246
00:10:32,893 --> 00:10:34,584
He was always needing something.
247
00:10:34,585 --> 00:10:36,551
- Food. Water.
- Yeah.
248
00:10:36,689 --> 00:10:38,276
A new brush for my hair.
249
00:10:38,287 --> 00:10:39,737
Classic beta shit, right?
250
00:10:41,084 --> 00:10:44,500
So, how do you deal with the beta shits?
251
00:10:44,526 --> 00:10:46,320
Well, probably the same way you do.
252
00:10:46,321 --> 00:10:48,356
Smile, and a little speck of hope,
253
00:10:48,357 --> 00:10:51,463
and they will do anything
you need them to do.
254
00:10:51,887 --> 00:10:53,129
I mean anything.
255
00:10:54,464 --> 00:10:57,604
But, I mean, you wouldn't take
advantage of Guillermo like that, right?
256
00:10:57,615 --> 00:10:59,410
No. Officially, no.
257
00:11:01,550 --> 00:11:05,933
I have grown suspicious of
Guillermo's beloved Jordan.
258
00:11:05,944 --> 00:11:09,498
I'm not sure that he has
Guillermo's best interests at heart.
259
00:11:09,723 --> 00:11:12,553
But surely, a true
leader would never dream
260
00:11:12,554 --> 00:11:16,108
of treating a loyal
underling with such contempt.
261
00:11:16,109 --> 00:11:17,385
That's point.
262
00:11:17,814 --> 00:11:19,560
It's simply not done.
263
00:11:19,561 --> 00:11:22,390
Would you excuse me for
a moment, Jordan? I just...
264
00:11:22,391 --> 00:11:23,874
I gotta make sure that Guillermo isn't
265
00:11:23,884 --> 00:11:26,430
putting too many rocks in my beer.
266
00:11:29,688 --> 00:11:32,621
No, seriously, man, I feel
like everyone's having kids now.
267
00:11:32,632 --> 00:11:34,115
It's, like, gross.
268
00:11:34,196 --> 00:11:36,542
Sorry, I don't wanna hang
out with babies all the time.
269
00:11:36,543 --> 00:11:38,613
Yeah. What about you,
man? You want kids?
270
00:11:38,614 --> 00:11:42,514
Uh... kids? What am I made of? Money?
271
00:11:43,964 --> 00:11:46,242
- Give me that. That's my man.
- Nice.
272
00:11:46,243 --> 00:11:48,623
- That's what I'm talking about.
- Fight! Danger!
273
00:11:48,624 --> 00:11:50,246
- Oh!
- Sorry!
274
00:11:52,266 --> 00:11:53,813
No sweat, man.
275
00:11:53,824 --> 00:11:56,447
We're just gonna go get this
cleaned up, like, away from here.
276
00:11:56,598 --> 00:11:57,943
What the fuck happened there?
277
00:11:57,944 --> 00:11:59,600
You were doing well with the wankers.
278
00:11:59,601 --> 00:12:01,774
- Mistake.
- I should damn well say so.
279
00:12:01,775 --> 00:12:03,535
Chill your tits, Laszlo.
280
00:12:03,536 --> 00:12:06,227
You chill your tits.
My monster, my rules.
281
00:12:06,228 --> 00:12:07,401
But he has feelings.
282
00:12:07,402 --> 00:12:09,230
Feelings? He's a monster.
283
00:12:09,231 --> 00:12:11,508
He'll have feelings when I
tell him to have feelings.
284
00:12:11,761 --> 00:12:13,061
Toilet.
285
00:12:13,062 --> 00:12:14,892
- What a surprise.
- Now, see what you've done?
286
00:12:16,859 --> 00:12:18,964
"I feel like I finally
found a place where I belong.
287
00:12:18,965 --> 00:12:21,069
And I wanna specially thank Jordan
288
00:12:21,070 --> 00:12:23,210
for seeing something in me
that perhaps I didn't see"...
289
00:12:23,211 --> 00:12:24,832
Guillermo, I must
speak with you urgently.
290
00:12:24,833 --> 00:12:26,627
No, not right now. I'm
practicing my speech.
291
00:12:26,628 --> 00:12:29,217
Guillermo, I do not trust this man
Jordan nor his intentions for you.
292
00:12:30,437 --> 00:12:31,722
Of course.
293
00:12:31,733 --> 00:12:33,527
- Of course what?
- Things are finally looking up for me.
294
00:12:33,876 --> 00:12:35,774
I have a purpose, a future.
295
00:12:35,775 --> 00:12:37,914
And here you are, trying
to ruin it all, 'cause why?
296
00:12:38,292 --> 00:12:39,916
- 'Cause you're jealous?
- I'm trying to help you.
297
00:12:39,917 --> 00:12:41,573
You've never believed in
me, never encouraged me.
298
00:12:42,045 --> 00:12:43,851
You just let me sit and stew
299
00:12:43,852 --> 00:12:46,060
and wonder endlessly
why I wasn't good enough.
300
00:12:46,061 --> 00:12:47,855
That does not sound like
something I would do.
301
00:12:47,856 --> 00:12:49,251
And Jordan is not like you.
302
00:12:49,262 --> 00:12:51,953
I'm about to get promoted
to full-time analyst,
303
00:12:51,964 --> 00:12:54,345
and here you are trying to tear
it all down like you always do
304
00:12:54,552 --> 00:12:56,070
when I have something
special in front of me.
305
00:12:56,071 --> 00:12:58,705
All right, everybody, circle
up. Come on, bring it in.
306
00:12:58,716 --> 00:13:01,201
Now, you know how much I hate
public speaking, but you guys...
307
00:13:01,612 --> 00:13:02,957
- Guillermo...
- No.
308
00:13:02,968 --> 00:13:04,285
This is how it's supposed to be.
309
00:13:04,286 --> 00:13:05,970
You work hard and you get rewarded.
310
00:13:05,981 --> 00:13:08,363
And if you don't like that, you
don't have to be a part of my life.
311
00:13:09,360 --> 00:13:12,811
We just made a sizable chunk
of change shorting Salazar.
312
00:13:12,812 --> 00:13:14,433
- Let's hear it. Yeah!
- Yeah!
313
00:13:14,434 --> 00:13:17,540
But there is one person
that I really gotta shout out.
314
00:13:17,541 --> 00:13:19,887
He's the reason why
we're all here tonight.
315
00:13:19,888 --> 00:13:24,098
Cannon's visionary
founder, Mr. Gene Nelson!
316
00:13:24,099 --> 00:13:26,342
A legend in our midst! Yeah.
317
00:13:26,343 --> 00:13:27,722
Don't let me interrupt you, Jordan.
318
00:13:28,028 --> 00:13:30,346
Tonight's about you
and your stellar team.
319
00:13:30,347 --> 00:13:32,279
Well, you know what, sir? It is a team.
320
00:13:32,290 --> 00:13:34,014
I'm always saying to the people here
321
00:13:34,025 --> 00:13:36,958
that we are like the Avengers
of Wall Street, right?
322
00:13:36,969 --> 00:13:39,902
We got the, of course,
Captain America back there.
323
00:13:39,913 --> 00:13:43,433
And Black Widow with
Spider-man right there.
324
00:13:43,488 --> 00:13:47,249
And Raj, you know you are my
Thor, baby, dropping that hammer.
325
00:13:47,260 --> 00:13:48,674
And who else?
326
00:13:48,675 --> 00:13:52,195
I guess Groot. So solid. And... Huh!
327
00:13:52,196 --> 00:13:54,404
Well, what does that make me?
Who brings everybody together?
328
00:13:54,405 --> 00:13:56,372
- Tony Stark.
- Tony Stark. I'll take it.
329
00:13:56,373 --> 00:13:59,167
Let's raise a glass to Mr. Nelson.
330
00:13:59,168 --> 00:14:00,998
Let's keep this rager raging.
331
00:14:02,965 --> 00:14:04,591
- Hey, Jordan. I thought you were...
- Thanks, buddy.
332
00:14:04,602 --> 00:14:06,596
- What about my...
- Hey, Mr. Nelson. VIP area...
333
00:14:06,607 --> 00:14:08,780
Thank you so much for that, Jordan.
334
00:14:08,791 --> 00:14:11,621
But I will make a real announcement.
335
00:14:11,733 --> 00:14:16,357
Sadly, my time here at
Cannon Capital Strategies
336
00:14:16,358 --> 00:14:17,703
is coming to an end.
337
00:14:18,018 --> 00:14:20,361
I know. Let your tears out, it's okay.
338
00:14:20,362 --> 00:14:22,674
But I got an offer I couldn't refuse
339
00:14:22,675 --> 00:14:24,676
from a very exciting new company,
340
00:14:24,677 --> 00:14:26,850
and I think they really wanted me
341
00:14:26,851 --> 00:14:28,474
because all I had to do to get the job
342
00:14:28,485 --> 00:14:30,831
was send them ten
thousand dollars in cash
343
00:14:31,131 --> 00:14:32,925
along with some photographs of my feet.
344
00:14:32,926 --> 00:14:34,444
Wait, what?
345
00:14:34,445 --> 00:14:36,012
- Headhunted!
- Yeah!
346
00:14:36,023 --> 00:14:40,820
So, now all I need to do is
convince 15 more people to join me.
347
00:14:41,097 --> 00:14:44,030
- Who's in?
- Uh, you just got scammed.
348
00:14:44,041 --> 00:14:46,905
Yeah, enjoy your totally
real, new job, bitch.
349
00:14:46,906 --> 00:14:48,562
- What?
- And if they're not hiring,
350
00:14:48,563 --> 00:14:50,253
- I'm sure the Ren Faire is. Great outfit.
- Oh, yeah.
351
00:14:50,433 --> 00:14:52,849
- I've got a new job...
- Leave Nadja alone!
352
00:14:53,430 --> 00:14:55,189
- Relax.
- Oh, I don't want another head.
353
00:14:55,190 --> 00:14:57,156
- I swear to fuck.
- Calm down.
354
00:14:57,157 --> 00:14:59,161
Dick.
355
00:14:59,172 --> 00:15:00,643
Thanks a lot, asshole.
356
00:15:00,644 --> 00:15:02,230
You behave like an animal.
357
00:15:02,231 --> 00:15:04,854
Come on. Stop beating yourself up.
358
00:15:04,855 --> 00:15:06,787
Laszlo mad at me.
359
00:15:06,788 --> 00:15:09,445
No, he's not mad at you.
360
00:15:09,446 --> 00:15:12,379
You were just exhibiting
classic party behavior.
361
00:15:12,380 --> 00:15:14,173
Who cares if you get loose as a goose?
362
00:15:14,534 --> 00:15:15,796
I monster.
363
00:15:15,797 --> 00:15:17,729
You are not a monster.
364
00:15:17,901 --> 00:15:20,559
You are a cool dude.
365
00:15:22,209 --> 00:15:23,736
Shit. Your staple's leaking.
366
00:15:25,772 --> 00:15:28,671
All right. I'm gonna call you
next week. Thanks for coming by.
367
00:15:28,672 --> 00:15:30,017
Hey, Jordan. Can I talk to you?
368
00:15:30,018 --> 00:15:32,019
Sorry. Old man Nelson
was going on and on,
369
00:15:32,020 --> 00:15:34,262
but his nurse/wife got him out of here,
370
00:15:34,263 --> 00:15:35,712
- so, what's up?
- Uh...
371
00:15:35,713 --> 00:15:38,232
I was just wondering why
you didn't let me go up there
372
00:15:38,233 --> 00:15:39,820
and give my speech?
373
00:15:39,821 --> 00:15:42,029
I'm so... I'm sorry. It slipped my mind.
374
00:15:42,030 --> 00:15:44,894
With Mr. Nelson being
here, it was crazy.
375
00:15:44,895 --> 00:15:46,689
I just didn't want things to
get too confusing for everybody.
376
00:15:46,700 --> 00:15:48,959
It's just that you asked
me to prepare a speech
377
00:15:48,970 --> 00:15:51,590
and I thought you were happy with
the work that I've been doing.
378
00:15:51,591 --> 00:15:54,455
I am happy. I'm thrilled.
379
00:15:54,456 --> 00:15:56,181
In fact, I got you something
380
00:15:56,182 --> 00:15:58,908
that's way better than a
stupid shout-out and a speech.
381
00:15:58,909 --> 00:16:00,289
Something that you've earned.
382
00:16:01,584 --> 00:16:02,654
Wait right here.
383
00:16:04,501 --> 00:16:06,122
It's happening.
384
00:16:06,156 --> 00:16:07,605
Close your eyes.
385
00:16:07,795 --> 00:16:09,624
Here we go. Ta-da! Open 'em up.
386
00:16:10,659 --> 00:16:13,868
Just a little thank you for all the
hard work that you do around here.
387
00:16:14,096 --> 00:16:15,443
We make a hell of a team, don't we?
388
00:16:16,961 --> 00:16:19,066
Wow. Thank you.
389
00:16:19,390 --> 00:16:21,356
- Hmm.
- Um...
390
00:16:21,367 --> 00:16:23,749
Just put it right there on
your desk. It'll look nice.
391
00:16:24,659 --> 00:16:26,039
It's just a...
392
00:16:26,971 --> 00:16:31,458
I just thought that maybe you
were going to give me a promotion?
393
00:16:33,925 --> 00:16:37,411
No, no, I... I can't promote
you until you're ready.
394
00:16:37,672 --> 00:16:39,293
It'll happen when the time is right.
395
00:16:39,294 --> 00:16:41,882
How much time would that
be, just, hypothetically?
396
00:16:41,883 --> 00:16:44,505
Oh, I don't know.
Ballpark a couple of years.
397
00:16:44,692 --> 00:16:46,280
You can't rush paying
your dues, Guillermo.
398
00:16:48,700 --> 00:16:50,195
No.
399
00:16:50,996 --> 00:16:52,251
No.
400
00:16:53,119 --> 00:16:54,860
- No!
- Whoa!
401
00:16:54,861 --> 00:16:57,303
When the time is right? I
already wasted so much time!
402
00:16:57,314 --> 00:16:58,872
What's your fucking damage, bro?
403
00:16:58,883 --> 00:17:00,385
My damage is, I'm tired of being strung
404
00:17:00,395 --> 00:17:02,202
along and I'm not doing it anymore!
405
00:17:02,213 --> 00:17:03,800
Really?
406
00:17:03,801 --> 00:17:06,769
Well, maybe you should check
your attitude and remember
407
00:17:06,770 --> 00:17:08,943
that you're talking
to your fucking boss.
408
00:17:08,944 --> 00:17:11,877
You're the person that helps
actually important people
409
00:17:12,099 --> 00:17:13,300
get their shit done.
410
00:17:13,311 --> 00:17:15,760
You're not a killer. You
gotta know your fucking place.
411
00:17:16,448 --> 00:17:17,864
Excuse me?
412
00:17:18,575 --> 00:17:20,541
Dude, that's company property.
413
00:17:20,542 --> 00:17:22,785
- You know who you're fucking with?
- I'm sorry.
414
00:17:22,786 --> 00:17:24,718
I don't think you know
who you're fucking with.
415
00:17:24,719 --> 00:17:26,271
- Oh, no, no. Nandor.
- No.
416
00:17:26,272 --> 00:17:27,998
Nandor, put him down. Nandor, no.
417
00:17:28,706 --> 00:17:33,227
You're maybe more successful and
rich and smart and better looking
418
00:17:33,279 --> 00:17:35,416
and have a generally
cooler vibe than him.
419
00:17:35,427 --> 00:17:37,876
But you do not get to
speak to him like that.
420
00:17:37,887 --> 00:17:39,957
- Okay, just-just put him down please.
- Put me down.
421
00:17:40,182 --> 00:17:43,357
I cannot have you speaking
to Guillermo this way.
422
00:17:43,358 --> 00:17:46,228
Drop him! Now.
423
00:17:46,706 --> 00:17:47,982
Fine.
424
00:17:53,989 --> 00:17:55,611
You know what? You're right.
425
00:17:55,612 --> 00:17:58,648
I'm not a killer. But I know
a way to hurt you even worse.
426
00:17:58,871 --> 00:18:01,425
I think I'll give a call to the
Securities and Exchange Commission.
427
00:18:01,972 --> 00:18:03,481
Yes!
428
00:18:04,107 --> 00:18:05,897
- What is that?
- Don't worry about it.
429
00:18:05,898 --> 00:18:07,726
Bullshit. What? You're gonna come at me?
430
00:18:07,727 --> 00:18:10,591
You openly talk about
insider trading constantly.
431
00:18:10,592 --> 00:18:12,421
Oh, yeah? Well, how
are you gonna prove it?
432
00:18:13,828 --> 00:18:15,684
Yeah, bro, it's my documentary.
433
00:18:16,842 --> 00:18:18,257
It's his documentary.
434
00:18:18,638 --> 00:18:21,468
Yeah. Over the years, I've learned
that you gotta protect yourself.
435
00:18:21,569 --> 00:18:22,602
Hey, take a look at this.
436
00:18:22,613 --> 00:18:25,097
And information is a
great way of doing that.
437
00:18:25,280 --> 00:18:26,694
- All right, you got all that?
- Yes.
438
00:18:27,068 --> 00:18:28,172
Now delete it.
439
00:18:28,402 --> 00:18:30,423
- Why?
- Dude, no paper trail.
440
00:18:30,434 --> 00:18:33,229
It's cool. The SEC guy is a total
pussy. He's not gonna do shit.
441
00:18:34,374 --> 00:18:35,961
People love telling me things.
442
00:18:35,962 --> 00:18:39,586
Maybe it's my face or that
they don't know I'm in the room.
443
00:18:39,587 --> 00:18:41,967
Either way, I keep receipts.
444
00:18:41,968 --> 00:18:45,558
And I'm not talking just
about the CVS ones.
445
00:18:47,077 --> 00:18:48,422
It's his documentary.
446
00:18:48,423 --> 00:18:52,586
Cut. Cut. Cut!
447
00:18:56,205 --> 00:18:57,362
Well, that was a bust.
448
00:18:57,513 --> 00:18:59,031
It looks like I'm back
to the drawing board
449
00:18:59,042 --> 00:19:00,870
with Cravensworth's Monster.
450
00:19:00,889 --> 00:19:03,478
- I'm not Cravensworth's Monster.
- What are you then?
451
00:19:04,853 --> 00:19:06,614
- Robinson's Monster.
- Huh.
452
00:19:07,684 --> 00:19:09,029
Don't be so preposterous.
453
00:19:09,030 --> 00:19:11,652
Well, you were really hard
on the poor guy in there.
454
00:19:11,653 --> 00:19:14,482
And what was he doing? He was
just cutting it up with the guys.
455
00:19:14,483 --> 00:19:16,277
He cried in the bathroom.
456
00:19:16,278 --> 00:19:19,280
He even had Nadja's back
without popping that guy's head.
457
00:19:19,404 --> 00:19:23,200
Face it, we created a
monster with real emotions.
458
00:19:23,211 --> 00:19:24,828
I, for one, am jazzed.
459
00:19:24,839 --> 00:19:26,494
- Jazz.
- Yeah.
460
00:19:26,495 --> 00:19:29,670
I suppose you have a point.
And between us, Colin Robinson,
461
00:19:29,671 --> 00:19:34,226
we will force the entire
scientific community to eat shit.
462
00:19:34,227 --> 00:19:35,331
- Well, we've gotta.
- Yeah.
463
00:19:35,332 --> 00:19:37,851
I love both my fathers.
464
00:19:37,852 --> 00:19:39,404
- Of course you do.
- Sure you do.
465
00:19:39,405 --> 00:19:41,466
Now kiss.
466
00:19:41,476 --> 00:19:42,506
I'm, uh...
467
00:19:42,517 --> 00:19:44,651
- What-What was that?
- Kiss, Daddies, now.
468
00:19:44,993 --> 00:19:46,462
No, I don't think that's gonna happen.
469
00:19:46,473 --> 00:19:48,240
I don't know. I mean, we could.
470
00:19:48,241 --> 00:19:49,897
We still have 7 floors to go.
471
00:19:50,149 --> 00:19:51,839
He really takes after his daddy.
472
00:19:51,850 --> 00:19:52,921
Horny little freak.
473
00:19:54,804 --> 00:19:56,317
All right. Let's get
out of this shithole.
474
00:19:56,318 --> 00:19:57,456
- Yes.
- Absolutely.
475
00:19:57,457 --> 00:19:58,699
Fair enough.
476
00:19:58,700 --> 00:20:02,151
Well, usually, it's kind
of a one-person thing.
477
00:20:02,152 --> 00:20:04,935
Give me your hand. Careful.
478
00:20:04,946 --> 00:20:08,295
- After you.
- Wow. What a night!
479
00:20:08,296 --> 00:20:10,677
Yeah. I feel like it
could've gone better for me.
480
00:20:10,678 --> 00:20:14,301
The way the two of us just took
down that evil guy like that.
481
00:20:14,302 --> 00:20:16,717
This must be what it feels
like to do a good deed.
482
00:20:16,924 --> 00:20:20,823
I feel so... so... charged up!
483
00:20:20,990 --> 00:20:22,861
Fuck these guys!
484
00:20:22,862 --> 00:20:24,070
Oh, shit!
485
00:20:25,865 --> 00:20:28,454
Yeah! Suck it.
486
00:20:29,766 --> 00:20:31,594
- Go, Nandor!
- This feels incredible.
487
00:20:31,595 --> 00:20:34,149
You know, it also make me wonder
488
00:20:35,150 --> 00:20:36,806
what else we could accomplish together.
489
00:20:36,807 --> 00:20:38,739
I'm not going back to
being your familiar.
490
00:20:38,740 --> 00:20:41,293
I'm not talking about you
being my familiar, Guillermo.
491
00:20:41,294 --> 00:20:44,331
Look, I will always be killing
people because I'm a vampire.
492
00:20:44,332 --> 00:20:47,231
It's what we do. But
what if I was more picky?
493
00:20:48,129 --> 00:20:49,923
If I use my powers for good.
494
00:20:49,924 --> 00:20:53,833
To bring justice to this unjust world.
495
00:20:53,844 --> 00:20:55,480
Oh. You mean like Batman.
496
00:20:55,481 --> 00:20:56,848
I don't know who that is.
497
00:20:56,859 --> 00:21:02,277
But also, I was thinking, why not
create a secret underground lair.
498
00:21:02,833 --> 00:21:07,526
And, I would have my
very own young sidekick.
499
00:21:07,853 --> 00:21:08,867
Like Robin.
500
00:21:08,878 --> 00:21:10,637
I don't think robbing
people is a good idea.
501
00:21:10,910 --> 00:21:12,980
- I don't know.
- You don't know.
502
00:21:12,981 --> 00:21:16,397
You do know! This is why
we've been brought together.
503
00:21:16,398 --> 00:21:18,675
It's not for me to make
you a fucking vampire.
504
00:21:18,836 --> 00:21:20,147
Fuck all that shit.
505
00:21:20,235 --> 00:21:23,819
But for us to create
an unbreakable alliance.
506
00:21:23,820 --> 00:21:26,753
To help people in this broken society.
507
00:21:27,085 --> 00:21:28,500
Some shit like that.
508
00:21:28,825 --> 00:21:32,793
Face it, Guillermo. You're never
gonna be just a normal human guy.
509
00:21:33,287 --> 00:21:35,116
You don't belong with them.
510
00:21:35,910 --> 00:21:37,325
You belong with us.
511
00:21:37,336 --> 00:21:38,661
But I'm not a vampire.
512
00:21:38,662 --> 00:21:41,044
No, you're not. You're
something even cooler.
513
00:21:42,965 --> 00:21:44,173
You are a warrior.
514
00:21:52,400 --> 00:21:53,987
Okay. Let go of my hand now.
515
00:21:54,771 --> 00:21:56,980
- It's a bit clammy.
- Sorry.
516
00:21:56,991 --> 00:21:58,612
What else can I throw at that building?
517
00:22:07,966 --> 00:22:11,452
I'm done with that pinstripe
pit of corporate despair.
518
00:22:11,463 --> 00:22:13,982
- You were only there for an hour, Laszlo.
- That was enough.
519
00:22:14,372 --> 00:22:16,718
I had a great time.
Got myself a souvenir.
520
00:22:17,096 --> 00:22:19,340
- So did I.
- Oh, no. Is that Lisa?
521
00:22:19,589 --> 00:22:22,419
She really was my favorite.
522
00:22:22,430 --> 00:22:23,578
Well, good night.
523
00:22:23,589 --> 00:22:25,531
I'll be in the shed if you guys...
524
00:22:26,488 --> 00:22:29,364
Guillermo? Where are you going?
525
00:22:29,375 --> 00:22:32,370
Get back here.
We've got things to discuss.
526
00:22:32,371 --> 00:22:35,200
First on the agenda, let's talk capes.
527
00:22:35,201 --> 00:22:37,962
What if we wear them on our fronts?
528
00:23:19,128 --> 00:23:24,128
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