1 00:00:02,628 --> 00:00:05,129 {\an8}We finished the staircase frame a couple hours ago. 2 00:00:05,130 --> 00:00:06,506 {\an8}Wow. 3 00:00:06,507 --> 00:00:08,132 {\an8}- Fiber optics in process. - Terrific. 4 00:00:08,133 --> 00:00:09,759 {\an8}We ordered the, uh, oak floors that you like. 5 00:00:09,760 --> 00:00:11,219 {\an8}Oh, good. Wonderful. 6 00:00:11,220 --> 00:00:13,971 But there is a matter, uh, we should discuss. 7 00:00:13,972 --> 00:00:15,723 - What? - Um... 8 00:00:15,724 --> 00:00:17,058 I don't really want to say this, 9 00:00:17,059 --> 00:00:18,184 since you're threw paint at my truck 10 00:00:18,185 --> 00:00:19,769 when I got the banisters wrong. 11 00:00:19,770 --> 00:00:21,729 Well, suggesting anything other than rose gold 12 00:00:21,730 --> 00:00:23,689 - was demented. - Totally. 13 00:00:23,690 --> 00:00:26,442 Um, but the building's gonna be more work than we discussed. 14 00:00:26,443 --> 00:00:27,985 What are we talking? 15 00:00:27,986 --> 00:00:29,570 Well, the electrical's not up to code. 16 00:00:29,571 --> 00:00:31,656 The HVAC needs to be completely gutted. 17 00:00:31,657 --> 00:00:33,991 The estimates on the theater are skyrocketing 18 00:00:33,992 --> 00:00:35,368 because of the custom lighting 19 00:00:35,369 --> 00:00:37,119 and the pyrotechnic capabilities. 20 00:00:37,120 --> 00:00:38,704 Well, a Vegas show without pyrotechnics 21 00:00:38,705 --> 00:00:40,414 is like a lap dance in broad daylight. 22 00:00:40,415 --> 00:00:42,250 I won't be caught dead doing it. 23 00:00:42,251 --> 00:00:44,460 All in all, we're looking at an additional $20 million 24 00:00:44,461 --> 00:00:46,045 to get the Diva operational, 25 00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:48,047 and that's just a conservative estimate. 26 00:00:48,048 --> 00:00:50,258 - Oh, God. - Just to say it-- 27 00:00:50,259 --> 00:00:54,971 it would save us a ton if we didn't have the Deborah statue. 28 00:00:54,972 --> 00:00:57,348 Well, how are people supposed to make an entrance 29 00:00:57,349 --> 00:00:59,433 - if not between my legs? - Mm-hmm. 30 00:00:59,434 --> 00:01:02,228 Where's the joy, the whimsy? Where's the--the... 31 00:01:02,229 --> 00:01:04,230 - Wow factor. - The wow factor? 32 00:01:04,231 --> 00:01:05,606 Well-- 33 00:01:05,607 --> 00:01:07,692 I mean, people love this design. 34 00:01:07,693 --> 00:01:09,610 The underwear mirror for upskirt selfies 35 00:01:09,611 --> 00:01:11,404 will be a destination in and of itself. 36 00:01:11,405 --> 00:01:14,782 It's just that it just seems technically unnecessary. 37 00:01:14,783 --> 00:01:16,367 Unnecessar-- 38 00:01:16,368 --> 00:01:18,119 Is there a gas leak in here? 39 00:01:18,120 --> 00:01:20,538 Actually, there is, and that's probably gonna cost-- 40 00:01:20,539 --> 00:01:22,373 - Oh, my God! - Okay, okay, okay. 41 00:01:22,374 --> 00:01:24,625 Maybe if we book a headliner, 42 00:01:24,626 --> 00:01:28,254 we can use some of the advance ticket sales to fund this? 43 00:01:28,255 --> 00:01:30,006 Okay. I'll get on that. 44 00:01:30,007 --> 00:01:32,717 You try to find an outside investor. 45 00:01:32,718 --> 00:01:34,218 Is now a bad time 46 00:01:34,219 --> 00:01:36,637 to discuss why we can't convert a chlorine pool 47 00:01:36,638 --> 00:01:38,306 - to pink champagne? - Yes! 48 00:01:38,307 --> 00:01:39,808 Yes, ma'am. 49 00:01:41,810 --> 00:01:43,186 He's into me. 50 00:01:53,280 --> 00:01:54,780 So what happened? 51 00:01:54,781 --> 00:01:56,449 What happened? I took her home. 52 00:01:56,450 --> 00:01:57,867 You didn't hear this from me, 53 00:01:57,868 --> 00:01:59,869 but she had the best night of her life. 54 00:01:59,870 --> 00:02:00,953 Ah. 55 00:02:00,954 --> 00:02:02,288 Oh, it's Deborah. 56 00:02:02,289 --> 00:02:03,956 - Could you give me one second? - Mm. 57 00:02:03,957 --> 00:02:05,374 Also, you shouldn't be talking to me about this stuff. 58 00:02:05,375 --> 00:02:06,626 Why not? 59 00:02:06,627 --> 00:02:08,878 - Hello. - Hi. I need your help. 60 00:02:08,879 --> 00:02:10,421 We're building that state-of-the-art theater 61 00:02:10,422 --> 00:02:12,256 at the Diva, and we need a comic 62 00:02:12,257 --> 00:02:14,508 for a residency who can bring in a ton of presales. 63 00:02:14,509 --> 00:02:15,968 Do you know of anyone? 64 00:02:15,969 --> 00:02:17,219 Deborah, you know you don't have to fish 65 00:02:17,220 --> 00:02:18,429 for compliments with me. 66 00:02:18,430 --> 00:02:19,764 As Kayla would say, 67 00:02:19,765 --> 00:02:21,390 you are the number-one living legend, 68 00:02:21,391 --> 00:02:23,100 and you would slay the boots down 69 00:02:23,101 --> 00:02:24,894 on the Diva, chiquita banana. 70 00:02:24,895 --> 00:02:26,520 It should be you. You should do it. 71 00:02:26,521 --> 00:02:27,688 No, no, no, no, no, 72 00:02:27,689 --> 00:02:29,774 my residency days are behind me. 73 00:02:29,775 --> 00:02:32,318 Oh. Uh, do you know Bruno Fox? 74 00:02:32,319 --> 00:02:34,070 Is he related to Redd Foxx? 75 00:02:34,071 --> 00:02:35,905 I don't think so, 'cause one is Black and one is white. 76 00:02:35,906 --> 00:02:37,448 But you know what? I never assume. 77 00:02:37,449 --> 00:02:39,075 You don't know what their mom was doing. 78 00:02:39,076 --> 00:02:40,493 - Okay. - Anyway, he's, like, 79 00:02:40,494 --> 00:02:42,620 a super-popular podcaster and stand-up. 80 00:02:42,621 --> 00:02:44,080 He's got a huge following. 81 00:02:44,081 --> 00:02:46,290 Um, oh, he does those Travelocity ads, 82 00:02:46,291 --> 00:02:47,541 which I actually find quite funny. 83 00:02:47,542 --> 00:02:48,876 I don't even hit "skip ad." 84 00:02:48,877 --> 00:02:51,629 Oh, that guy! Oh, he'd be good. 85 00:02:51,630 --> 00:02:54,090 - Can you get him? - Uh, yeah. 86 00:02:54,091 --> 00:02:55,716 Yeah, I--yeah, I can get him. 87 00:02:55,717 --> 00:02:57,594 - Great. Let me know. - Will do. 88 00:03:02,349 --> 00:03:04,266 It is so weird to be back here. 89 00:03:04,267 --> 00:03:07,478 Wow. She already took down the pictures I put up. 90 00:03:07,479 --> 00:03:09,939 We've been gone for over two years. 91 00:03:09,940 --> 00:03:11,732 Also, why would she keep up pictures 92 00:03:11,733 --> 00:03:13,317 of you and your college friends? 93 00:03:13,318 --> 00:03:15,111 'Cause we're hot and fun. 94 00:03:15,112 --> 00:03:17,613 Well, look what the cat farted in, 95 00:03:17,614 --> 00:03:19,949 LuSuck And Queefer. 96 00:03:19,950 --> 00:03:22,243 Did you two pork yet? 97 00:03:22,244 --> 00:03:23,536 Great to see you guys. 98 00:03:23,537 --> 00:03:25,079 If you're looking to poach clients, 99 00:03:25,080 --> 00:03:27,332 there's a dialysis center right down the street. 100 00:03:28,834 --> 00:03:30,751 - Oh, my goodness. Wow, that's really funny. 101 00:03:30,752 --> 00:03:31,877 So, look, I'm gonna keep this brief. 102 00:03:31,878 --> 00:03:32,878 Please. 103 00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:34,380 We have an opportunity for one of your clients. 104 00:03:34,381 --> 00:03:36,006 As you may have heard, Deborah Vance is opening 105 00:03:36,007 --> 00:03:37,591 a casino hotel in downtown Vegas, 106 00:03:37,592 --> 00:03:41,011 and we would like Bruno Fox to be the very first 107 00:03:41,012 --> 00:03:43,389 - comic in residence. - Whoa. 108 00:03:43,390 --> 00:03:45,266 Wow, Bruno. 109 00:03:45,267 --> 00:03:46,934 He has a lot of balls in the air right now. 110 00:03:46,935 --> 00:03:48,310 Mm-hmm. 111 00:03:48,311 --> 00:03:50,521 This is a huge opportunity for a stand-up, right? 112 00:03:50,522 --> 00:03:51,981 I mean, you know that. 113 00:03:51,982 --> 00:03:53,941 A Vegas residency means a steady paycheck, 114 00:03:53,942 --> 00:03:55,484 shows every night of the week. 115 00:03:55,485 --> 00:03:56,819 A lot more money than he'd make on the road. 116 00:03:56,820 --> 00:03:58,446 - Oh, yeah. - Yeah. 117 00:03:58,447 --> 00:04:00,781 Well, you know, I'll try to remember to mention it to him 118 00:04:00,782 --> 00:04:02,783 - the next time I talk to him. - Yeah. 119 00:04:02,784 --> 00:04:03,868 - We'll see what he says. - Yeah, yeah. 120 00:04:03,869 --> 00:04:05,619 The next time you talk to him could be right now 121 00:04:05,620 --> 00:04:06,829 if you just dial him up. 122 00:04:06,830 --> 00:04:08,581 Ooh, we'd love to, but we got to go right now 123 00:04:08,582 --> 00:04:11,333 'cause we've got massages, the kind where you come. 124 00:04:11,334 --> 00:04:13,335 - Oh. - Together, you're gonna go? 125 00:04:13,336 --> 00:04:14,962 - Yes. - Are you serious? 126 00:04:14,963 --> 00:04:16,505 Are you really gonna walk out-- 127 00:04:16,506 --> 00:04:18,507 - Later, dildos. - Oh, my God. 128 00:04:18,508 --> 00:04:20,092 I know they're gonna present this to Bruno like 129 00:04:20,093 --> 00:04:21,385 it's a total waste of time just to fuck with us. 130 00:04:21,386 --> 00:04:22,595 So sadistic. 131 00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:24,013 It reminds me of how I used 132 00:04:24,014 --> 00:04:25,848 to treat this one girl in my summer camp. 133 00:04:25,849 --> 00:04:27,183 So mean. 134 00:04:27,184 --> 00:04:29,101 You know what? Fuck them. 135 00:04:29,102 --> 00:04:30,811 We are gonna go to Bruno ourselves 136 00:04:30,812 --> 00:04:32,313 and present this offer directly. 137 00:04:32,314 --> 00:04:34,440 Hell, yeah! I knew you had that dog in ya. 138 00:04:34,441 --> 00:04:37,193 - Ruff! - All right, here we go. 139 00:04:37,194 --> 00:04:39,153 He's performing this weekend in Kalamazoo, Michigan. 140 00:04:39,154 --> 00:04:42,406 - We are going. - Central time, kinky. 141 00:04:42,407 --> 00:04:44,408 - It's Eastern. - Oh. 142 00:04:44,409 --> 00:04:46,286 Mm, that sucks. 143 00:04:48,622 --> 00:04:50,080 Mm! 144 00:04:50,081 --> 00:04:52,541 To be asked to be a food tester-- dream come true. 145 00:04:52,542 --> 00:04:53,834 Well, it's perfect. 146 00:04:53,835 --> 00:04:55,878 I mean, you have flyover-state taste, 147 00:04:55,879 --> 00:04:57,838 and Josefina has the most refined palate 148 00:04:57,839 --> 00:04:59,632 - of anyone I've ever met. - Mm. 149 00:04:59,633 --> 00:05:01,926 Pistachio cream in an entrée? 150 00:05:01,927 --> 00:05:03,969 I'm feeling crazy for this. 151 00:05:03,970 --> 00:05:05,638 So, what, if we like this chef's food, 152 00:05:05,639 --> 00:05:07,598 you guys are gonna just poach him from Marty? 153 00:05:07,599 --> 00:05:09,683 - Yep. - Damn, ice cold. 154 00:05:09,684 --> 00:05:11,227 The rice is hot, though. 155 00:05:11,228 --> 00:05:13,979 Well, it's not personal. It's just business. 156 00:05:13,980 --> 00:05:16,857 Oh, excuse me. 157 00:05:16,858 --> 00:05:19,693 I love a little crunch. Big slay. 158 00:05:19,694 --> 00:05:22,154 Oh, Deborah, I've been working on the opening joke. 159 00:05:22,155 --> 00:05:23,531 So what about this? 160 00:05:23,532 --> 00:05:25,032 Um, hello, Madison Square Garden. 161 00:05:25,033 --> 00:05:26,325 I've been silenced for 18 months, 162 00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:27,868 so let me finally say this. 163 00:05:27,869 --> 00:05:30,204 Big pants only look good if you're tall. 164 00:05:30,205 --> 00:05:31,455 Eh. 165 00:05:31,456 --> 00:05:33,249 I don't want to talk about pants. 166 00:05:33,250 --> 00:05:35,292 I can't believe we can't figure out this opener. 167 00:05:35,293 --> 00:05:37,461 No, I know. I think we have writer's block. 168 00:05:37,462 --> 00:05:39,088 We got to get some new energy going. 169 00:05:39,089 --> 00:05:40,673 You know, we could try cold plunging. 170 00:05:40,674 --> 00:05:43,092 - Helps Joe Rogan. - Helps him do what? 171 00:05:43,093 --> 00:05:44,927 Right. Good point. 172 00:05:44,928 --> 00:05:47,596 So, I put out some feelers to some friends in the VC world 173 00:05:47,597 --> 00:05:49,390 about funding for the Diva. 174 00:05:49,391 --> 00:05:51,267 And that was Graham Sweeney's office. 175 00:05:51,268 --> 00:05:53,602 He's a young tech developer-- big portfolio. 176 00:05:53,603 --> 00:05:55,104 He immediately responded 177 00:05:55,105 --> 00:05:56,605 and wants to fly in to meet with you. 178 00:05:56,606 --> 00:05:57,940 Oh, great. 179 00:05:57,941 --> 00:06:00,734 And he asked for Ava to come, too. 180 00:06:00,735 --> 00:06:02,403 What? 181 00:06:02,404 --> 00:06:03,779 Me? Why? 182 00:06:03,780 --> 00:06:05,698 Oh, my God, do you think this is 183 00:06:05,699 --> 00:06:07,491 like an "Indecent Proposal" situation, 184 00:06:07,492 --> 00:06:09,159 where he'll only give you the millions 185 00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:11,704 if he has one fabulous night with Ms. Ava Daniels? 186 00:06:11,705 --> 00:06:12,830 "Millions"? 187 00:06:12,831 --> 00:06:14,081 Please, he could get you 188 00:06:14,082 --> 00:06:16,585 with a donation to Greenpeace and some combat boots. 189 00:06:17,752 --> 00:06:19,879 That's... true. 190 00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:21,839 No one is asking you to have sex, 191 00:06:21,840 --> 00:06:24,633 but these VC guys are freaky, and we need the money. 192 00:06:24,634 --> 00:06:28,554 So, if he asks to eat sushi off you, you know, play ball. 193 00:06:28,555 --> 00:06:30,306 All right, fine. I'll go. 194 00:06:30,307 --> 00:06:32,141 But I'm telling you-- if there's a Philadelphia roll 195 00:06:32,142 --> 00:06:33,767 on my titty, I'm eating that shit. 196 00:06:33,768 --> 00:06:35,728 Marcus, set up the meeting. 197 00:06:35,729 --> 00:06:37,980 And, you, after this, I'm taking you to a parking lot 198 00:06:37,981 --> 00:06:39,690 to practice walking in high heels. 199 00:06:39,691 --> 00:06:40,900 Mmm. 200 00:06:40,901 --> 00:06:43,777 Now, that is a crispy skin. 201 00:06:43,778 --> 00:06:45,697 Bam! 202 00:06:51,286 --> 00:06:52,953 I'm serious! 203 00:06:52,954 --> 00:06:54,955 So I come out of the men's room, 204 00:06:54,956 --> 00:06:57,374 and I see a trans guy standing there waiting, right? 205 00:06:57,375 --> 00:06:58,959 I look him in his eyes. 206 00:06:58,960 --> 00:07:03,088 I say, bruh, I do not mean this like it sounds, 207 00:07:03,089 --> 00:07:06,175 but do not go in there. 208 00:07:06,176 --> 00:07:09,261 Whoo-hoo! 209 00:07:09,262 --> 00:07:11,597 Thank you. Thank you! 210 00:07:11,598 --> 00:07:13,641 Let's go get this son of a bitch. 211 00:07:13,642 --> 00:07:16,019 - I love Kalamazoo! - Yeah! 212 00:07:19,648 --> 00:07:21,023 - Bruno Fox. - Yo! 213 00:07:21,024 --> 00:07:22,524 - Can we come in? - Entrez-vous. 214 00:07:22,525 --> 00:07:24,777 - Okay, bonjour. - Aha. Yes. 215 00:07:24,778 --> 00:07:27,196 Jimmy LuSaque, Jr. This is my partner, Kayla Schaefer. 216 00:07:27,197 --> 00:07:28,822 - How you doing? - Pleasure. 217 00:07:28,823 --> 00:07:30,491 Um, sorry to accost you right after your set, 218 00:07:30,492 --> 00:07:32,201 - which was amazing by the way. - So funny. 219 00:07:32,202 --> 00:07:33,369 - We loved it, yeah. - We couldn't stop smiling 220 00:07:33,370 --> 00:07:34,828 - and laughing. - Thank you. 221 00:07:34,829 --> 00:07:37,206 But we have a very attractive offer for you. 222 00:07:37,207 --> 00:07:39,083 I mean, if it's a cuck thing, maybe, 223 00:07:39,084 --> 00:07:41,085 but I'm pretty much retired from gay stuff. 224 00:07:41,086 --> 00:07:42,169 - Oh. - It's not a cuck thing. 225 00:07:42,170 --> 00:07:43,671 - No. No. - Yeah. 226 00:07:43,672 --> 00:07:45,714 We're managers from LA, Schaefer & LuSaque. 227 00:07:45,715 --> 00:07:48,676 - We represent Deborah Vance. - Among others. 228 00:07:48,677 --> 00:07:50,260 Um, and we just wanted to talk to you 229 00:07:50,261 --> 00:07:53,472 about a stand-up opportunity that we think you might like. 230 00:07:53,473 --> 00:07:55,808 Look, man, sorry, but when I'm offstage, 231 00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:57,810 I can't be about the work anymore, you know? 232 00:07:57,811 --> 00:07:59,853 - Okay. - Hmm-kay. 233 00:07:59,854 --> 00:08:02,147 - Um-- - But I am down to go out, 234 00:08:02,148 --> 00:08:03,983 if y'all want to party, hmm? 235 00:08:03,984 --> 00:08:05,401 - Um-- - Um-- 236 00:08:05,402 --> 00:08:06,485 - I'm 100% down for that. 237 00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:08,821 - Okay, sure. - Yeah, let's do it. 238 00:08:08,822 --> 00:08:09,822 What are you thinking? 239 00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:12,282 I mean, there's a little bar down the street called Cokies. 240 00:08:12,283 --> 00:08:14,660 Do we need a reservation for Cokies? 241 00:08:14,661 --> 00:08:16,578 No, but we do need someone to drive. 242 00:08:16,579 --> 00:08:18,080 Can y'all drive us? 243 00:08:18,081 --> 00:08:19,915 We got a Subaru we rented, so let's do it. 244 00:08:19,916 --> 00:08:21,041 Music to my ears. 245 00:08:21,042 --> 00:08:22,459 The CarPlay doesn't work, but that's all right, 246 00:08:22,460 --> 00:08:24,795 'cause I'll just sing for us-- hope you like Nelly Furtado. 247 00:08:24,796 --> 00:08:26,839 Kidding me? I'm a Nelly boy. 248 00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:28,841 Let's get some beers for the ride, though, right? 249 00:08:28,842 --> 00:08:30,051 Um... 250 00:08:36,766 --> 00:08:38,350 - Hi. - Hello. 251 00:08:38,351 --> 00:08:40,060 - Good evening. - Right this way. 252 00:08:40,061 --> 00:08:42,438 - Thank you. - I'll go get Mr. Sweeney. 253 00:08:42,439 --> 00:08:44,064 What did she say? 254 00:08:44,065 --> 00:08:46,233 This dress is so tight, I can't hear in it. 255 00:08:46,234 --> 00:08:48,068 Also, it does not leave room for underwear. 256 00:08:48,069 --> 00:08:50,487 I think my bush is leaving an indentation. 257 00:08:50,488 --> 00:08:53,449 Well, well, well, Deborah Vance in the flesh. 258 00:08:53,450 --> 00:08:55,200 This is such an honor. I'm Graham Sweeney. 259 00:08:55,201 --> 00:08:57,077 - Graham, good to meet you. - Likewise. 260 00:08:57,078 --> 00:09:00,122 - And Ava. - Hey. What's going on? 261 00:09:00,123 --> 00:09:01,540 Hi. 262 00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:03,083 I'm so psyched you could come, too. 263 00:09:03,084 --> 00:09:05,461 - I'm a huge fan of both of you. - Thank you. 264 00:09:05,462 --> 00:09:08,005 So, I guess you're probably wondering 265 00:09:08,006 --> 00:09:09,882 - why I wanted to meet with you. - Well, no. 266 00:09:09,883 --> 00:09:11,341 I'm never surprised when a man's interested 267 00:09:11,342 --> 00:09:14,094 - in meeting me. - I bet you're not. 268 00:09:14,095 --> 00:09:16,555 Um, well, would you mind if I did a little presentation? 269 00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:17,806 Sure. 270 00:09:17,807 --> 00:09:19,183 Okay. Please, come sit. 271 00:09:19,184 --> 00:09:20,310 All right. 272 00:09:23,438 --> 00:09:24,521 Lane will be right out with some drinks. 273 00:09:24,522 --> 00:09:26,608 She makes a bomb martini. 274 00:09:27,984 --> 00:09:30,652 Have a seat, please. 275 00:09:30,653 --> 00:09:32,112 All right. 276 00:09:32,113 --> 00:09:34,531 - Now, you ladies comfortable? - Not really. 277 00:09:34,532 --> 00:09:37,951 Okay. First, a little bit about me. 278 00:09:37,952 --> 00:09:39,745 I got my start streamlining 279 00:09:39,746 --> 00:09:42,206 the way hospitals buy and receive medical tubing. 280 00:09:42,207 --> 00:09:43,540 Oh, I used to sell 281 00:09:43,541 --> 00:09:45,375 a cat-themed blood pressure monitor. 282 00:09:45,376 --> 00:09:47,127 See? So you get it. Genius. 283 00:09:47,128 --> 00:09:49,505 So now that I've conquered the health-care industry, 284 00:09:49,506 --> 00:09:51,924 it's time for me to move into my next venture, 285 00:09:51,925 --> 00:09:56,386 which is an LLM generative AI model I'm calling... 286 00:09:56,387 --> 00:10:00,140 - QuikScribbl. - Ah. 287 00:10:00,141 --> 00:10:02,226 It's an AI chatbot that helps people sound 288 00:10:02,227 --> 00:10:04,728 like the most optimized, funniest, 289 00:10:04,729 --> 00:10:06,146 smartest version of themselves. 290 00:10:06,147 --> 00:10:08,065 It's like Photoshopping your voice. 291 00:10:08,066 --> 00:10:10,109 For anybody who's looking to punch up 292 00:10:10,110 --> 00:10:13,320 the way that they speak or write or make jokes, 293 00:10:13,321 --> 00:10:15,114 this will help, okay? 294 00:10:15,115 --> 00:10:18,326 Take, for example, a-- a bridesmaid at a wedding. 295 00:10:19,828 --> 00:10:23,622 She wants to make a funny toast, but she's a bank teller. 296 00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:25,374 Sorry, so when you say "she," 297 00:10:25,375 --> 00:10:27,543 you mean an AI person that you invented? 298 00:10:27,544 --> 00:10:30,212 - That I prompted, yes. - Cool. 299 00:10:30,213 --> 00:10:31,964 Let's see how she does. 300 00:10:31,965 --> 00:10:34,758 Sarah's always loved to have fun, 301 00:10:34,759 --> 00:10:38,720 maybe a little too much fun, if you know what I mean. 302 00:10:38,721 --> 00:10:40,389 Sex! 303 00:10:40,390 --> 00:10:44,309 Ugh. Now, that sucked shit, right? 304 00:10:44,310 --> 00:10:45,936 Yep. 305 00:10:45,937 --> 00:10:48,397 But what if she had had help crafting that toast 306 00:10:48,398 --> 00:10:51,608 by none other than comedy goddess Deborah Vance? 307 00:10:51,609 --> 00:10:53,068 Love her. 308 00:10:53,069 --> 00:10:55,779 It might sound a little something like this. 309 00:10:55,780 --> 00:10:57,406 According to the Talmud, 310 00:10:57,407 --> 00:11:00,325 every bride is beautiful on her wedding day. 311 00:11:00,326 --> 00:11:02,578 The Talmud is, of course, 312 00:11:02,579 --> 00:11:05,706 the drag queen who did Sarah's cheek contouring today. 313 00:11:05,707 --> 00:11:07,541 Boom goes the dynamite! 314 00:11:07,542 --> 00:11:10,127 Even Grandpa's deaf ass is laughing at that one. 315 00:11:10,128 --> 00:11:12,963 Not bad. Yeah, it--it does sound like me. 316 00:11:12,964 --> 00:11:14,923 Yeah, so, um... 317 00:11:14,924 --> 00:11:19,011 how did you train it to sound like Deborah already? 318 00:11:19,012 --> 00:11:21,305 Well, by scraping material that's online. 319 00:11:21,306 --> 00:11:23,432 Oh, so you stole it. 320 00:11:23,433 --> 00:11:25,225 Technically, right now it's not regulated, 321 00:11:25,226 --> 00:11:27,019 and that's why I've come to you. 322 00:11:27,020 --> 00:11:28,437 I want to compensate you, 323 00:11:28,438 --> 00:11:30,314 and I don't just want what's online. 324 00:11:30,315 --> 00:11:32,024 I want the real Deborah Vance. 325 00:11:32,025 --> 00:11:35,360 Oh, well, then you should've met me three noses ago. 326 00:11:35,361 --> 00:11:37,654 Well, they nailed it. It's a sexy-ass nose. 327 00:11:37,655 --> 00:11:40,782 Now, look, I want your full library 328 00:11:40,783 --> 00:11:44,411 and for you to work with the AI itself, training it. 329 00:11:44,412 --> 00:11:47,623 Yeah, can I ask-- um, why us? 330 00:11:47,624 --> 00:11:51,084 Because Deborah has the perfect voice for QuikScribbl. 331 00:11:51,085 --> 00:11:53,253 I mean, you have such mass appeal. 332 00:11:53,254 --> 00:11:54,713 That's why you had 333 00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:56,381 the number-one late-night show in America. 334 00:11:56,382 --> 00:11:58,800 You tell it like it is but in a funny way, 335 00:11:58,801 --> 00:12:00,886 and that's how everybody wants to be. 336 00:12:00,887 --> 00:12:03,180 Well, this does kind of prove my long-standing theory 337 00:12:03,181 --> 00:12:05,432 that my way is best and everyone else is wrong. 338 00:12:05,433 --> 00:12:07,476 Ha! Exactly. 339 00:12:07,477 --> 00:12:09,478 See, I want that, and when I heard 340 00:12:09,479 --> 00:12:11,355 that you were looking for investment in your casino, 341 00:12:11,356 --> 00:12:13,148 I was like, well, this is the coolest opportunity 342 00:12:13,149 --> 00:12:15,275 - for us to partner up. - Mm. 343 00:12:15,276 --> 00:12:18,654 So, ladies, should we talk about the nuts and bolts? 344 00:12:18,655 --> 00:12:19,988 - Let's. - Yeah. 345 00:12:19,989 --> 00:12:22,617 Okay. So we've got three blocks. 346 00:12:24,452 --> 00:12:25,619 It is getting so late. 347 00:12:25,620 --> 00:12:27,079 We got to bring up the residency 348 00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:28,538 as soon as he gets back, because I don't know 349 00:12:28,539 --> 00:12:30,874 - how much longer I can stay out. - Come on. 350 00:12:30,875 --> 00:12:33,085 You stayed up all night for the Fiona Apple presale. 351 00:12:33,086 --> 00:12:34,836 - You can do it tonight. - She never goes on tour. 352 00:12:34,837 --> 00:12:36,630 It was "Idler Wheel." It was a big thing for me. 353 00:12:36,631 --> 00:12:38,507 - All right. - Hey, there he is. 354 00:12:38,508 --> 00:12:40,008 Can we get another round, please? 355 00:12:40,009 --> 00:12:42,135 - You got it. - Wow. Another round. 356 00:12:42,136 --> 00:12:43,637 Indeed. 357 00:12:43,638 --> 00:12:45,222 I haven't drank this much since I rushed. 358 00:12:45,223 --> 00:12:47,391 - You were in a frat? - No, almost. 359 00:12:47,392 --> 00:12:49,518 I wouldn't fuck the goat, and I reported them to the dean. 360 00:12:49,519 --> 00:12:50,936 But you know what? I'm proud of that because 361 00:12:50,937 --> 00:12:53,522 it led to much healthier rush policies on campus. 362 00:12:53,523 --> 00:12:55,232 That's just the kind of guy he is. 363 00:12:55,233 --> 00:12:57,484 He would never fuck any animals. 364 00:12:57,485 --> 00:12:59,194 - No, I wouldn't. - Okay. 365 00:12:59,195 --> 00:13:01,321 Anyway, so, listen, Deborah Vance, um, 366 00:13:01,322 --> 00:13:03,031 is opening a casino in Las Vegas, 367 00:13:03,032 --> 00:13:05,325 and they're looking for a comedian to do a residency, 368 00:13:05,326 --> 00:13:07,870 and we think that comedian should be you. 369 00:13:10,123 --> 00:13:12,207 - A Vegas residency? - That's right. 370 00:13:12,208 --> 00:13:14,543 Huh. 371 00:13:14,544 --> 00:13:16,003 I could get off the road finally. 372 00:13:16,004 --> 00:13:17,337 Mm-hmm. 373 00:13:17,338 --> 00:13:19,131 That could be a good thing for me. 374 00:13:19,132 --> 00:13:20,674 Bruno, Vegas. 375 00:13:20,675 --> 00:13:22,926 Come on, I mean, raw seafood bars 376 00:13:22,927 --> 00:13:26,471 as far as the eye can see, strip clubs on every block-- 377 00:13:26,472 --> 00:13:30,892 I mean, it's the promised land for guys like us. 378 00:13:30,893 --> 00:13:34,021 This is probably the tequila talking, but, yeah. 379 00:13:34,022 --> 00:13:35,230 - I'm in. - Yeah? 380 00:13:35,231 --> 00:13:36,815 - Yeah. - Okay, amazing. 381 00:13:36,816 --> 00:13:38,650 Fuck it. We are doing it. Huh? Come on! 382 00:13:38,651 --> 00:13:40,694 - All right! - Come on, come on, come on. 383 00:13:40,695 --> 00:13:42,321 So, listen, we're gonna head back to LA tomorrow, 384 00:13:42,322 --> 00:13:44,114 but we'll be in touch with details. 385 00:13:44,115 --> 00:13:46,825 - Well, you can't leave. - We can't? 386 00:13:46,826 --> 00:13:48,368 No. I have another show tomorrow night. 387 00:13:48,369 --> 00:13:50,412 Come on, we got to go out afterwards, 388 00:13:50,413 --> 00:13:52,581 celebrate, get drinks. 389 00:13:52,582 --> 00:13:54,041 Oh, uh... 390 00:13:54,042 --> 00:13:55,709 Look, if we're gonna work together, 391 00:13:55,710 --> 00:13:56,877 I need to get to know you guys. 392 00:13:56,878 --> 00:13:59,004 We got to bond, you know? 393 00:13:59,005 --> 00:14:00,589 Stay, stay. 394 00:14:00,590 --> 00:14:01,882 - Please? - Okay. 395 00:14:01,883 --> 00:14:03,967 - Okay, I mean... - All right, we'll stay. 396 00:14:03,968 --> 00:14:05,469 - Yeah. - Yes! 397 00:14:05,470 --> 00:14:08,597 Now, one question-- who's getting the bag? 398 00:14:08,598 --> 00:14:10,599 - Wow, cocaine. - Oh, cocaine. 399 00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:12,392 - Um... - I just-- 400 00:14:12,393 --> 00:14:14,603 I was really looking forward to reading before bed. 401 00:14:14,604 --> 00:14:15,854 Trick question-- I already got it. 402 00:14:15,855 --> 00:14:17,356 Oh, my gosh. 403 00:14:17,357 --> 00:14:19,816 Okay, fine. I can only do two lines. 404 00:14:19,817 --> 00:14:22,444 You have given me so much to think about. 405 00:14:22,445 --> 00:14:24,780 This is really, really interesting. 406 00:14:24,781 --> 00:14:26,448 Fantastic pitch. 407 00:14:26,449 --> 00:14:28,742 Yeah, I have-- I have a couple questions. I mean-- 408 00:14:28,743 --> 00:14:30,994 Look, Ava, I know how much you've contributed 409 00:14:30,995 --> 00:14:32,954 to Deborah's recent material. 410 00:14:32,955 --> 00:14:35,457 So, if I want to accurately capture her true voice, 411 00:14:35,458 --> 00:14:36,958 I need you involved. 412 00:14:36,959 --> 00:14:38,877 Okay, so, when we hand over the material, 413 00:14:38,878 --> 00:14:40,420 you can ensure that it's just gonna be used 414 00:14:40,421 --> 00:14:42,297 for bridesmaid speeches and not to make, like, 415 00:14:42,298 --> 00:14:47,010 Hitler seem young and funny to red-pilled dark web gooners? 416 00:14:47,011 --> 00:14:51,390 Well, we're not in the business of censoring our customers. 417 00:14:51,391 --> 00:14:52,974 - Right. - Don't try to argue with her. 418 00:14:52,975 --> 00:14:54,559 You'll get nowhere. 419 00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:56,728 Next thing you know, you'll have donated $10,000 420 00:14:56,729 --> 00:14:58,980 to some barista's top surgery. 421 00:14:58,981 --> 00:15:00,816 I don't know what happened to the term "boob job." 422 00:15:00,817 --> 00:15:02,317 That's what they called it when I had one. 423 00:15:02,318 --> 00:15:05,612 Ava, AI is here, and it's here to stay. 424 00:15:05,613 --> 00:15:08,156 So you either get on board, or you get left in the past. 425 00:15:08,157 --> 00:15:09,533 See? 426 00:15:09,534 --> 00:15:11,952 That is a big part of why I hate it. 427 00:15:11,953 --> 00:15:14,329 This--this forced inevitability. 428 00:15:14,330 --> 00:15:16,540 People like you are always saying that it's happening 429 00:15:16,541 --> 00:15:18,041 whether you like it or not, 430 00:15:18,042 --> 00:15:20,669 but you're the ones making it happen, okay? 431 00:15:20,670 --> 00:15:22,254 And you could easily stop it 432 00:15:22,255 --> 00:15:23,755 if people could say that they didn't want it. 433 00:15:23,756 --> 00:15:25,382 But you don't want to give people a choice. 434 00:15:25,383 --> 00:15:28,009 So you just say, oh, the train's already on the tracks, 435 00:15:28,010 --> 00:15:29,553 and you don't let people decide for themselves. 436 00:15:29,554 --> 00:15:32,639 I'm sorry. It is technological R-A-P-E. 437 00:15:32,640 --> 00:15:34,850 - "Rape"? - You said it, not me. 438 00:15:34,851 --> 00:15:37,436 Oh, okay, okay, let's-- let's all just take a breath here. 439 00:15:37,437 --> 00:15:39,271 I wish I could take a breath. 440 00:15:39,272 --> 00:15:40,814 I'm strapped down in this motherfucker. 441 00:15:40,815 --> 00:15:42,858 I can't breathe in here, Deborah. 442 00:15:42,859 --> 00:15:45,277 Now, why should we believe that this app is this amazing thing 443 00:15:45,278 --> 00:15:46,778 that is gonna change the world? 444 00:15:46,779 --> 00:15:48,155 Obviously, you want us to believe that 445 00:15:48,156 --> 00:15:49,489 because you stand to profit from it. 446 00:15:49,490 --> 00:15:50,949 So of course you're gonna tell us that 447 00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:53,702 it's happening no matter what and it's inevitable, okay? 448 00:15:53,703 --> 00:15:55,704 Oh, my God, this is exactly like when, like, 449 00:15:55,705 --> 00:15:57,706 a fucking random-ass diner puts a sign out front 450 00:15:57,707 --> 00:15:59,249 that's like, best waffles in America. 451 00:15:59,250 --> 00:16:00,292 And it's like, yeah, according to who? 452 00:16:00,293 --> 00:16:02,002 The people trying to sell the fucking waffles! 453 00:16:02,003 --> 00:16:06,089 I am not trying to sell you bad waffles, trust. 454 00:16:06,090 --> 00:16:08,508 Well, yet again, she's managed to bring waffles 455 00:16:08,509 --> 00:16:09,926 into the conversation. 456 00:16:09,927 --> 00:16:11,303 Okay, lots to think about here, Graham. 457 00:16:11,304 --> 00:16:13,013 - Yeah. - Thanks so much. 458 00:16:13,014 --> 00:16:14,931 Uh, I'll give it a thought. I'll talk to my people. 459 00:16:14,932 --> 00:16:16,184 - Thanks, Deborah. - Yeah. 460 00:16:19,979 --> 00:16:21,229 Sorry. 461 00:16:21,230 --> 00:16:23,106 - Ava, you need a hand? - No, I'm fi--I'm good. 462 00:16:23,107 --> 00:16:25,610 - Okay. - I'm fine. 463 00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:33,700 I hate this place. 464 00:16:33,701 --> 00:16:35,452 It smells like an old bicycle seat. 465 00:16:35,453 --> 00:16:37,162 It's not that bad. 466 00:16:37,163 --> 00:16:40,540 And we needed to save money, so let's just try and go to sleep. 467 00:16:40,541 --> 00:16:42,876 I just normally sleep naked. 468 00:16:42,877 --> 00:16:45,504 Well, sorry, but tonight you're not sleeping naked. 469 00:16:45,505 --> 00:16:47,005 Okay? 470 00:16:47,006 --> 00:16:49,842 Okay, Jimmy. 471 00:16:56,933 --> 00:16:59,351 - What is going on over there? - I'm so itchy! 472 00:16:59,352 --> 00:17:01,770 - My clothes are making me itchy. - Okay. 473 00:17:01,771 --> 00:17:04,314 You can take off your clothes underneath the covers. 474 00:17:04,315 --> 00:17:05,982 But then in the morning, you're putting them back on 475 00:17:05,983 --> 00:17:09,152 - under the covers, okay? - Yay. 476 00:17:09,153 --> 00:17:12,113 Take off my lady boxers. 477 00:17:12,114 --> 00:17:13,323 Okay, I don't need a play-by-play. 478 00:17:13,324 --> 00:17:14,617 Just do your thing. 479 00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:20,789 Why are you taking them off like that? 480 00:17:20,790 --> 00:17:22,749 That's how I always take them off. I'm disrobing. 481 00:17:22,750 --> 00:17:25,044 - You do this alone? - What? Yes. 482 00:17:31,676 --> 00:17:33,385 Hello? 483 00:17:33,386 --> 00:17:35,387 I've been waiting for you down in my office. 484 00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:37,806 Oh, God, can we crack a window? 485 00:17:37,807 --> 00:17:39,808 It smells like King Tutankhamun's tomb 486 00:17:39,809 --> 00:17:41,434 - in here. - Sorry. 487 00:17:41,435 --> 00:17:43,562 I just--I got distracted researching the ethics of AI. 488 00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:45,814 Turns out, really bad. 489 00:17:45,815 --> 00:17:47,983 Yeah, well, everything's unethical 490 00:17:47,984 --> 00:17:49,609 if you think about it too much. 491 00:17:49,610 --> 00:17:51,820 As my manicurist says, "Can you changing? 492 00:17:51,821 --> 00:17:53,196 Then don't think about." 493 00:17:53,197 --> 00:17:54,781 Oh, my God. 494 00:17:54,782 --> 00:17:56,575 Oh, you want me to whitewash my manicurist? 495 00:17:56,576 --> 00:17:57,951 People have accents! 496 00:17:57,952 --> 00:17:59,411 Okay, just gonna move past that one. 497 00:17:59,412 --> 00:18:00,996 Look, before you meet with this guy again, 498 00:18:00,997 --> 00:18:02,622 you should know that large language models 499 00:18:02,623 --> 00:18:05,125 like QuikScribbl are really, really bad for the environment. 500 00:18:05,126 --> 00:18:07,627 It's an app. Everyone uses apps? 501 00:18:07,628 --> 00:18:09,838 Aren't all apps bad for the environment? 502 00:18:09,839 --> 00:18:12,841 Yes, but AI uses servers that need 15 times more energy, 503 00:18:12,842 --> 00:18:15,302 and they build them in poorer communities. Look at this. 504 00:18:15,303 --> 00:18:19,055 In Memphis, an AI plant is stealing all the fresh water 505 00:18:19,056 --> 00:18:21,891 and blasting the air with nitrogen oxides. 506 00:18:21,892 --> 00:18:23,226 I see. 507 00:18:23,227 --> 00:18:25,228 And how much energy are you using 508 00:18:25,229 --> 00:18:27,606 keeping 400 tabs open on your browser? 509 00:18:27,607 --> 00:18:29,482 See, I can play this game, too. 510 00:18:29,483 --> 00:18:31,318 - Deborah. - No, come on. 511 00:18:31,319 --> 00:18:33,111 I sold my Malaysian palm-oil farm. 512 00:18:33,112 --> 00:18:36,156 - Can't I have this? - No. 513 00:18:36,157 --> 00:18:38,950 I am lending my name and my expertise 514 00:18:38,951 --> 00:18:42,162 to a program that is going to make people's lives easier. 515 00:18:42,163 --> 00:18:45,457 What about the economy, okay? I know you care about that. 516 00:18:45,458 --> 00:18:47,459 I mean, AI has already destroyed 517 00:18:47,460 --> 00:18:49,544 massive sectors of the workforce. 518 00:18:49,545 --> 00:18:51,504 Yeah, well, you know, if you job is replaceable, 519 00:18:51,505 --> 00:18:52,881 let it be replaced. 520 00:18:52,882 --> 00:18:54,507 I'm sorry. That's how the market works. 521 00:18:54,508 --> 00:18:56,635 Oh, my God. Okay, well, what about me? 522 00:18:56,636 --> 00:18:59,471 AI is absolutely gonna take away jobs from writers. 523 00:18:59,472 --> 00:19:01,473 - It already has. - Not if you're good! 524 00:19:01,474 --> 00:19:03,266 If you're good, you can't be replaced. 525 00:19:03,267 --> 00:19:05,518 Did you know that in the '80s, there was a woman in Miami 526 00:19:05,519 --> 00:19:08,438 who would do my entire set verbatim? 527 00:19:08,439 --> 00:19:10,482 And, honestly, before my lift, 528 00:19:10,483 --> 00:19:12,484 she might've looked better than me, too. 529 00:19:12,485 --> 00:19:15,111 But she couldn't re-create my stage presence, 530 00:19:15,112 --> 00:19:16,988 and neither can a computer! 531 00:19:16,989 --> 00:19:18,573 You're missing the point, okay? 532 00:19:18,574 --> 00:19:20,200 Maybe you will be fine, 533 00:19:20,201 --> 00:19:22,285 but there are a ton of people who won't be, okay? 534 00:19:22,286 --> 00:19:24,663 This is causing a cataclysmic reshaping of our society 535 00:19:24,664 --> 00:19:25,955 that's going to doom us-- 536 00:19:25,956 --> 00:19:29,000 Honey, please, please, it's 9:00 a.m. 537 00:19:29,001 --> 00:19:30,710 Okay, well, I'm sorry. 538 00:19:30,711 --> 00:19:32,712 I cannot in good conscience participate in this. 539 00:19:32,713 --> 00:19:35,674 So, if you use any of my work, I will sue you. 540 00:19:35,675 --> 00:19:37,092 On what grounds? 541 00:19:37,093 --> 00:19:39,010 The one cool thing about the American legal system 542 00:19:39,011 --> 00:19:41,930 is that I can sue you even if I have no legal standing. 543 00:19:41,931 --> 00:19:44,349 I learned that from you. 544 00:19:44,350 --> 00:19:46,309 Okay, fine. 545 00:19:46,310 --> 00:19:48,311 I will just do this deal 546 00:19:48,312 --> 00:19:50,480 with material I've written without you. 547 00:19:50,481 --> 00:19:52,941 Now, can we please stop talking about this 548 00:19:52,942 --> 00:19:54,359 and go downstairs and work? 549 00:19:54,360 --> 00:19:55,694 No. 550 00:19:55,695 --> 00:19:58,822 I'm gonna go outside and look at a tree. 551 00:19:58,823 --> 00:20:01,075 Maybe you could teach your toaster to paint. 552 00:20:11,544 --> 00:20:13,545 If you were a letter, what letter would you be? 553 00:20:13,546 --> 00:20:15,213 Mm. A? 554 00:20:15,214 --> 00:20:17,799 You would definitely be an S, unpredictable-- 555 00:20:17,800 --> 00:20:20,844 All right, there we go-- three Long Island Iced Teas. 556 00:20:20,845 --> 00:20:23,513 Oh, no, thank you, but Long Island's make me sick. 557 00:20:23,514 --> 00:20:24,723 Horny. 558 00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:26,558 - What? - They make you horny. 559 00:20:26,559 --> 00:20:28,476 Okay, how would you even know that? 560 00:20:28,477 --> 00:20:29,978 Everybody at tennis camp knew that. 561 00:20:29,979 --> 00:20:31,354 You were trying to dance with everyone. 562 00:20:31,355 --> 00:20:32,981 - Okay. - It's on now. 563 00:20:32,982 --> 00:20:34,315 - That's awesome. - Okay. 564 00:20:34,316 --> 00:20:36,776 - Cheers to us. - Cheers, cheers indeed. 565 00:20:36,777 --> 00:20:39,487 Okay, Bruno, I think we need to talk 566 00:20:39,488 --> 00:20:43,366 about the specifics of the Divalicious residency. 567 00:20:43,367 --> 00:20:45,034 - Residen... - Residency. 568 00:20:45,035 --> 00:20:46,369 Cy. 569 00:20:46,370 --> 00:20:48,079 What is your earliest availability? 570 00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:50,999 And maybe we could talk about, um, an on-sale day. 571 00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:53,501 - We can get your poster done. - Guys, guys, guys, guys, guys. 572 00:20:53,502 --> 00:20:54,836 You're making me, like, nervous, all right? 573 00:20:54,837 --> 00:20:56,504 - Like-- - No! Don't be nervous. 574 00:20:56,505 --> 00:20:59,257 - Come on, man. - What is that voice? 575 00:20:59,258 --> 00:21:00,592 Don't be nervous. 576 00:21:00,593 --> 00:21:02,177 I said I don't want to talk business. 577 00:21:02,178 --> 00:21:04,053 It's boring. I want to have fun. 578 00:21:04,054 --> 00:21:05,930 Okay. let's play a drinking game, 579 00:21:05,931 --> 00:21:07,307 get to know each other better, 580 00:21:07,308 --> 00:21:09,142 get a little bit more comfortable. 581 00:21:09,143 --> 00:21:11,811 I am up for a drinking game at all times. What do you got? 582 00:21:11,812 --> 00:21:13,813 So me and my besties play a game 583 00:21:13,814 --> 00:21:15,440 where you go around the circle, 584 00:21:15,441 --> 00:21:18,359 and you say the worst thing that you've ever done. 585 00:21:18,360 --> 00:21:21,029 And if your worst thing is worse than theirs, 586 00:21:21,030 --> 00:21:22,655 you got to take a drink. 587 00:21:22,656 --> 00:21:24,032 Jimmy, you go first. 588 00:21:24,033 --> 00:21:26,034 Oh, no, let's play flip cup. 589 00:21:26,035 --> 00:21:29,037 Do it! Do it! Do it! 590 00:21:29,038 --> 00:21:31,623 Okay, okay. Okay, this is actually bad. 591 00:21:31,624 --> 00:21:34,417 Um, we got a PR box 592 00:21:34,418 --> 00:21:37,629 of free Sephora products for a client, 593 00:21:37,630 --> 00:21:39,964 and I took them back to Sephora and returned them 594 00:21:39,965 --> 00:21:41,508 - for store credit. - No. 595 00:21:41,509 --> 00:21:43,426 - I know, I know. - That's so bad. 596 00:21:43,427 --> 00:21:45,512 I know, I know, I know. I've been carrying that around. 597 00:21:45,513 --> 00:21:46,888 It's--it's not how I normally am. 598 00:21:46,889 --> 00:21:48,640 But I was just out of this beard lube. 599 00:21:48,641 --> 00:21:50,725 I have this particular kind of cream that I shave with, 600 00:21:50,726 --> 00:21:52,435 - and I needed to get it. - Okay. 601 00:21:52,436 --> 00:21:55,230 - So, Bruno, your turn. - Yeah. No, I'm good, I'm good. 602 00:21:55,231 --> 00:21:57,065 Oh, come on, I just told my Sephora thing, 603 00:21:57,066 --> 00:21:59,442 - so now I kind of feel weird. - Okay, fine. I'll go, I'll go. 604 00:21:59,443 --> 00:22:00,819 I got a good one. 605 00:22:00,820 --> 00:22:03,905 Okay, the worst thing I ever did was, 606 00:22:03,906 --> 00:22:05,865 I poked holes in my dad's condoms 607 00:22:05,866 --> 00:22:07,325 'cause I wanted a sister. 608 00:22:07,326 --> 00:22:09,494 And then he used those condoms with his mistress 609 00:22:09,495 --> 00:22:10,703 and then got her pregnant. 610 00:22:10,704 --> 00:22:12,705 And she wanted to keep it, but it ended up being a boy, 611 00:22:12,706 --> 00:22:14,499 so now we have, like, a creepy half brother 612 00:22:14,500 --> 00:22:17,502 - who no one talks to at events. - Oh. I really love Robert. 613 00:22:17,503 --> 00:22:19,379 I try and make him feel welcome whenever I see him. 614 00:22:19,380 --> 00:22:20,463 He stinks. 615 00:22:20,464 --> 00:22:23,007 Okay, Bruno, now that you know the rules, your turn. 616 00:22:23,008 --> 00:22:25,302 What's the worst thing you've ever done? 617 00:22:27,763 --> 00:22:30,683 It was six years ago this coming August. 618 00:22:32,518 --> 00:22:33,935 What was? 619 00:22:33,936 --> 00:22:35,812 I was leaving my ex's. 620 00:22:35,813 --> 00:22:38,147 And we'd just gotten in one of these fights 621 00:22:38,148 --> 00:22:41,484 that we would get into all the time, where... 622 00:22:41,485 --> 00:22:44,696 we would just say awful fucking shit to each other, man, 623 00:22:44,697 --> 00:22:47,992 just trying our hardest to hurt one another. 624 00:22:50,286 --> 00:22:51,786 I was driving. 625 00:22:51,787 --> 00:22:56,499 I was so pissed off, and I couldn't see straight. 626 00:22:56,500 --> 00:22:58,126 And he was just there. 627 00:22:58,127 --> 00:23:00,128 He was just suddenly there out of nowhere, 628 00:23:00,129 --> 00:23:01,671 and I slammed on the brakes. 629 00:23:01,672 --> 00:23:04,592 I slammed on the brakes, but it was too late, man. 630 00:23:06,510 --> 00:23:08,512 It was too late. 631 00:23:10,264 --> 00:23:14,684 That sound, that sound-- I can hear it all the time. 632 00:23:14,685 --> 00:23:16,185 I hear it when I'm trying to sleep. 633 00:23:16,186 --> 00:23:18,314 It's like it haunts me. 634 00:23:20,816 --> 00:23:23,611 He was dead. 635 00:23:25,321 --> 00:23:27,614 And what would driving him to the hospital have done? 636 00:23:27,615 --> 00:23:31,534 He was gone. So I just drove and drove. 637 00:23:31,535 --> 00:23:33,829 I just kept driving. 638 00:23:36,415 --> 00:23:39,292 - You got to turn yourself in. - What? 639 00:23:39,293 --> 00:23:41,753 Bruno, think about the family. 640 00:23:41,754 --> 00:23:43,504 That poor family. 641 00:23:43,505 --> 00:23:45,757 - Jimmy-- - What? They need closure. 642 00:23:45,758 --> 00:23:48,343 Uh, Bruno, you can't keep living like this, okay? 643 00:23:48,344 --> 00:23:50,178 It's eating you alive. You're killing yourself. 644 00:23:50,179 --> 00:23:51,888 Look at you-- you're on the road all the time. 645 00:23:51,889 --> 00:23:54,557 You're drinking way too much. You're self-medicating. 646 00:23:54,558 --> 00:23:56,100 You're totally scaring us. 647 00:23:56,101 --> 00:23:57,894 You never want to talk about work. It's weird. 648 00:23:57,895 --> 00:24:00,313 The only way through is out. 649 00:24:00,314 --> 00:24:03,150 You've got to turn yourself in, brother. 650 00:24:04,985 --> 00:24:06,486 You're right. 651 00:24:06,487 --> 00:24:08,988 I can't live this fucking lie anymore. 652 00:24:08,989 --> 00:24:11,074 Fuck, man. 653 00:24:11,075 --> 00:24:13,576 I'll call 911, I guess. 654 00:24:13,577 --> 00:24:15,079 Yeah. 655 00:24:17,539 --> 00:24:18,957 Hello. 656 00:24:18,958 --> 00:24:20,875 I am Kayla Schaefer, 657 00:24:20,876 --> 00:24:24,003 and I am reporting a murder 658 00:24:24,004 --> 00:24:25,881 that my friend did. 659 00:24:34,473 --> 00:24:36,391 Graham, hello. 660 00:24:36,392 --> 00:24:38,309 Hey. Come on. 661 00:24:38,310 --> 00:24:40,687 - Hello, gorgeous. - Oh, nice to see you again. 662 00:24:40,688 --> 00:24:42,689 Mwah. 663 00:24:42,690 --> 00:24:44,732 You hungry? You want a, uh, piggy? 664 00:24:44,733 --> 00:24:46,902 - Oh, I think I'll pass. - Okay. 665 00:24:48,404 --> 00:24:49,737 Hey, uh, thanks for meeting me here. 666 00:24:49,738 --> 00:24:52,323 Oh, yeah. You a big, uh, soccer fan? 667 00:24:52,324 --> 00:24:53,408 Eh... 668 00:24:53,409 --> 00:24:55,576 I own that French team right there in the blue unis. 669 00:24:55,577 --> 00:24:58,037 - Oh. - I'd be there right now, 670 00:24:58,038 --> 00:24:59,706 but it's a lot more important to me 671 00:24:59,707 --> 00:25:02,250 to lock down this deal with you. 672 00:25:02,251 --> 00:25:04,836 Well, I'll tell you what-- once my casino is open, 673 00:25:04,837 --> 00:25:06,421 I'll make sure you have your own seat 674 00:25:06,422 --> 00:25:08,715 at the Diva's sportsbook lounge. 675 00:25:08,716 --> 00:25:10,842 Okay. So you're in? 676 00:25:10,843 --> 00:25:12,468 My lawyers looked over the terms, 677 00:25:12,469 --> 00:25:15,930 - and they gave it the okay. - Ah. Yes! 678 00:25:15,931 --> 00:25:18,766 Eulogies everywhere just got a whole lot fucking funnier. 679 00:25:18,767 --> 00:25:20,518 You are gonna make 680 00:25:20,519 --> 00:25:22,020 - so many people funny. - Oh, well... 681 00:25:22,021 --> 00:25:25,064 And I bet pretty soon you're gonna be using it 682 00:25:25,065 --> 00:25:26,524 to write your own material. 683 00:25:26,525 --> 00:25:28,526 Oh, well, I doubt that. 684 00:25:28,527 --> 00:25:30,653 Well, you are... 685 00:25:30,654 --> 00:25:32,864 'cause it's gonna be so good, you're gonna want to. 686 00:25:32,865 --> 00:25:34,157 No, I don't think so. 687 00:25:34,158 --> 00:25:36,200 Mm, yes, you will, 688 00:25:36,201 --> 00:25:37,869 'cause everyone's gonna be using it. 689 00:25:37,870 --> 00:25:39,662 So, if you want to keep up with the other comedians, 690 00:25:39,663 --> 00:25:40,913 you're gonna have to. 691 00:25:40,914 --> 00:25:42,498 But I want to write the jokes. 692 00:25:42,499 --> 00:25:43,958 - Mm-hmm. - I like doing the work. 693 00:25:43,959 --> 00:25:46,669 So you're telling me that if you got stuck on a punch line 694 00:25:46,670 --> 00:25:49,297 and you had a tool at your disposal to help you with that, 695 00:25:49,298 --> 00:25:51,507 - you wouldn't use it? - Absolutely not. 696 00:25:51,508 --> 00:25:52,842 There's no shortcut. 697 00:25:52,843 --> 00:25:55,470 Yeah, but here's the thing, there is. 698 00:25:55,471 --> 00:25:57,597 I created it. You're welcome. 699 00:25:57,598 --> 00:25:59,474 Well, okay, fine. Yes, there is. 700 00:25:59,475 --> 00:26:02,685 But using that shortcut then makes it something else. 701 00:26:02,686 --> 00:26:04,479 It makes it not art. 702 00:26:04,480 --> 00:26:06,898 Um, I'm sorry, but your joke 703 00:26:06,899 --> 00:26:10,318 about laser hair removal is art? 704 00:26:10,319 --> 00:26:11,694 Okay, you're right. 705 00:26:11,695 --> 00:26:13,780 It's pretentious to call it art. 706 00:26:13,781 --> 00:26:17,325 But that "laser hair removal" joke is something I arrived at 707 00:26:17,326 --> 00:26:19,494 after trying a million other versions. 708 00:26:19,495 --> 00:26:21,329 Every time that joke didn't work, 709 00:26:21,330 --> 00:26:24,123 not only did I make it better, but it made me a comedian... 710 00:26:24,124 --> 00:26:25,708 - Mm-hmm. - Because to become one, 711 00:26:25,709 --> 00:26:28,127 you have to do it and fail and do it and fail 712 00:26:28,128 --> 00:26:31,589 over and over and over until you figure out who you are. 713 00:26:31,590 --> 00:26:33,633 Lady, stop squawking at me. 714 00:26:33,634 --> 00:26:35,843 All I'm trying to do 715 00:26:35,844 --> 00:26:38,721 is make your life easier. 716 00:26:38,722 --> 00:26:40,389 But it shouldn't be. 717 00:26:40,390 --> 00:26:42,517 Why are you trying to optimize the creative process? 718 00:26:42,518 --> 00:26:43,976 I mean, that's one of the things 719 00:26:43,977 --> 00:26:45,645 we've actually figured out-- we're good there. 720 00:26:45,646 --> 00:26:46,979 You know, and we have been ever since 721 00:26:46,980 --> 00:26:49,023 cavemen told stories about bears. 722 00:26:49,024 --> 00:26:51,526 I mean, fix the ozone, come up with a cure for cancer. 723 00:26:51,527 --> 00:26:53,111 Oh, my God, cancer again. 724 00:26:53,112 --> 00:26:56,656 Look, it sounds a little bit like you don't really respect QuikScribbl. 725 00:26:56,657 --> 00:26:57,865 I respect your business acumen. 726 00:26:57,866 --> 00:26:59,659 I do, I do, but art is only art 727 00:26:59,660 --> 00:27:01,244 because of the humanity behind it. 728 00:27:01,245 --> 00:27:03,371 Plenty of artists are already using it. 729 00:27:03,372 --> 00:27:04,789 Well, fine. That's their right. 730 00:27:04,790 --> 00:27:06,624 It doesn't mean I have to respect them. 731 00:27:06,625 --> 00:27:09,753 Oh, excuse me, I didn't know Shakespeare had a beehive. 732 00:27:11,880 --> 00:27:14,632 Oh, okay, that was good. That was good. 733 00:27:14,633 --> 00:27:16,968 See, you came up with that all by yourself. 734 00:27:16,969 --> 00:27:19,220 Aren't you proud? 735 00:27:19,221 --> 00:27:21,139 Yeah, this is clearly not gonna work. 736 00:27:21,140 --> 00:27:23,182 - Yeah, guess not. - Take care. 737 00:27:23,183 --> 00:27:24,767 Okay, you take care, too. 738 00:27:24,768 --> 00:27:26,227 You know what, lady? 739 00:27:26,228 --> 00:27:29,272 I can get any comic I want to train my AI. 740 00:27:29,273 --> 00:27:31,440 "Kill Tony" said he'd do it for free. 741 00:27:31,441 --> 00:27:33,025 Yeah, you do that. 742 00:27:33,026 --> 00:27:35,987 By the way, one of your guys just scored an own goal. 743 00:27:35,988 --> 00:27:37,780 Ah, fuck! 744 00:27:37,781 --> 00:27:40,241 Fuck. 745 00:27:40,242 --> 00:27:42,326 - What? - Chill out, man. 746 00:27:42,327 --> 00:27:43,704 Just watch the game. 747 00:27:53,463 --> 00:27:55,883 What are you doing out here? 748 00:27:57,301 --> 00:28:00,094 Listening to the crickets while I write... 749 00:28:00,095 --> 00:28:02,430 watching the stars, communing with nature, 750 00:28:02,431 --> 00:28:04,016 you know, while I still can. 751 00:28:09,563 --> 00:28:12,231 You get your blood money? 752 00:28:12,232 --> 00:28:14,066 No. 753 00:28:14,067 --> 00:28:16,819 I decided against it. 754 00:28:16,820 --> 00:28:19,572 - Are you serious? - Yes. 755 00:28:19,573 --> 00:28:22,033 Yes! Whoo! 756 00:28:22,034 --> 00:28:23,951 Score one for the good guys! 757 00:28:23,952 --> 00:28:26,370 I am so glad I got through to you. 758 00:28:26,371 --> 00:28:28,456 No, no, this was an amoral decision 759 00:28:28,457 --> 00:28:30,917 based on a nerd being a loser to me. 760 00:28:30,918 --> 00:28:33,502 - If you say so. - Oh, please. 761 00:28:33,503 --> 00:28:35,421 This was not all you. 762 00:28:35,422 --> 00:28:37,465 If I was that susceptible to your influence, 763 00:28:37,466 --> 00:28:39,050 I would have become a communist 764 00:28:39,051 --> 00:28:41,052 the moment you first darkened my doorstep. 765 00:28:41,053 --> 00:28:43,555 - Whatever. - Oh, God. 766 00:28:46,225 --> 00:28:47,516 All right. 767 00:28:47,517 --> 00:28:49,560 Now that that's behind us, 768 00:28:49,561 --> 00:28:52,063 let's see if we can tackle the real existential problem 769 00:28:52,064 --> 00:28:53,731 - of our time. - Hmm. 770 00:28:53,732 --> 00:28:56,400 - This goddamn opening joke. - Oh, yeah. 771 00:28:56,401 --> 00:28:59,487 I've been, uh-- I've been working on a couple things. 772 00:28:59,488 --> 00:29:01,073 Check that out. 773 00:29:05,827 --> 00:29:07,662 - Oof. - Okay. 774 00:29:07,663 --> 00:29:09,538 Guess I didn't figure it out. 775 00:29:09,539 --> 00:29:12,750 Well, no, but that's okay. 776 00:29:12,751 --> 00:29:14,377 We will... 777 00:29:14,378 --> 00:29:17,880 or we won't, you know, but at least it'll be on us. 778 00:29:17,881 --> 00:29:19,925 Hell, yeah. 779 00:29:22,219 --> 00:29:23,719 I got to be honest-- 780 00:29:23,720 --> 00:29:25,221 I haven't written anything in, like, 30 minutes. 781 00:29:25,222 --> 00:29:27,140 I accidentally dropped my pen in the pond. 782 00:29:29,768 --> 00:29:31,770 But I've been thinking. 783 00:29:37,276 --> 00:29:38,610 Housekeeping. 784 00:29:44,992 --> 00:29:46,994 Okay. 785 00:29:49,121 --> 00:29:50,913 - Oh, my God! Why-- - Oh, oh! 786 00:29:50,914 --> 00:29:52,957 - Oh, my God! - Where are my clothes? 787 00:29:52,958 --> 00:29:54,875 - Where are my clothes? - I'm sorry. 788 00:29:54,876 --> 00:29:56,752 - Did we have sex? - No! 789 00:29:56,753 --> 00:29:58,045 Well, then why am I naked? 790 00:29:58,046 --> 00:29:59,338 Oh, my God, did Kayla and I have sex? 791 00:29:59,339 --> 00:30:00,965 - Who's Kayla? - My partner! 792 00:30:00,966 --> 00:30:03,551 Then wouldn't it be okay if you had sex? 793 00:30:03,552 --> 00:30:05,261 No! She's my business partner. 794 00:30:05,262 --> 00:30:06,637 This is a work trip. 795 00:30:06,638 --> 00:30:08,139 What is going on? 796 00:30:08,140 --> 00:30:09,598 Did you guys have sex? 797 00:30:09,599 --> 00:30:10,683 - No! - No! 798 00:30:10,684 --> 00:30:13,311 Okay, well, he's naked. You got to give him privacy. 799 00:30:13,312 --> 00:30:15,146 Come on. 800 00:30:15,147 --> 00:30:17,982 So weird. What is up with this hotel? 801 00:30:17,983 --> 00:30:20,151 Kayla, what happened last night? 802 00:30:20,152 --> 00:30:22,361 Well, we convinced Bruno 803 00:30:22,362 --> 00:30:24,280 to turn himself in after a hit-and-run. 804 00:30:24,281 --> 00:30:25,948 - That was crazy. - Oh, my God. 805 00:30:25,949 --> 00:30:27,742 Fuck, that's right. And then what? 806 00:30:27,743 --> 00:30:30,077 And then the last Long Island really got you. 807 00:30:30,078 --> 00:30:31,746 You could barely walk. 808 00:30:31,747 --> 00:30:34,915 It was kind of sweet seeing you so vulnerable like that. 809 00:30:34,916 --> 00:30:37,001 Then we found out that the hotel has bedbugs. 810 00:30:37,002 --> 00:30:38,336 Bedbugs? 811 00:30:38,337 --> 00:30:39,962 - Oh! Oh! Oh, my-- - I know. 812 00:30:39,963 --> 00:30:43,007 I--I was like, bedbugs are real? 813 00:30:43,008 --> 00:30:44,800 We freaked out. We burned all our clothes. 814 00:30:44,801 --> 00:30:48,179 - You burned our clothes? - We burned our clothes. 815 00:30:48,180 --> 00:30:50,139 You were the one that lit the first match, honey. 816 00:30:50,140 --> 00:30:52,475 Why did you let me sleep here if there are bedbugs? 817 00:30:52,476 --> 00:30:53,768 Let you? 818 00:30:53,769 --> 00:30:55,644 I don't let you do anything. 819 00:30:55,645 --> 00:30:59,023 I'm not in charge of anyone's actions but my own. 820 00:30:59,024 --> 00:31:01,192 I am really getting it. 821 00:31:01,193 --> 00:31:03,027 Oh, my God, no wonder you were so itchy. 822 00:31:03,028 --> 00:31:04,737 Of course there were bedbugs. 823 00:31:04,738 --> 00:31:07,365 Anyways, I got us new clothes at Sassafras. 824 00:31:07,366 --> 00:31:09,450 What the fuck is Sassafras? 825 00:31:09,451 --> 00:31:11,660 It's a teen clothing store for girls. 826 00:31:11,661 --> 00:31:13,204 It's the only place that was open, 827 00:31:13,205 --> 00:31:15,414 but they have some really cute stuff in there. 828 00:31:15,415 --> 00:31:17,792 It's also so important for girls in the community 829 00:31:17,793 --> 00:31:19,460 to have a place that they can go, 830 00:31:19,461 --> 00:31:21,962 get cute stuff that doesn't sexualize them. 831 00:31:21,963 --> 00:31:23,506 I don't care. Good for them. 832 00:31:23,507 --> 00:31:25,216 You should care. I talked to Mandy about it. 833 00:31:25,217 --> 00:31:27,510 Who the fuck is Mandy, and why are we talking about her? 834 00:31:27,511 --> 00:31:28,886 The owner of Sassafras! 835 00:31:28,887 --> 00:31:31,555 She is a small-business owner, and you just yelled about her! 836 00:31:31,556 --> 00:31:34,016 Okay, I'm sure she's lovely. I just want to get dressed. 837 00:31:34,017 --> 00:31:35,810 This is highly inappropriate, Kayla. 838 00:31:35,811 --> 00:31:38,020 Okay, here, here's your clothes. 839 00:31:38,021 --> 00:31:39,814 Put it on. 840 00:31:39,815 --> 00:31:42,358 Last time I ever help you with anything. 841 00:31:42,359 --> 00:31:45,027 Just kidding. 842 00:31:45,028 --> 00:31:46,737 Hurry up, We're gonna miss the flight. 843 00:31:46,738 --> 00:31:48,532 Oh. 844 00:31:53,161 --> 00:31:55,454 Oh, my God, are you sure we're walking the right way? 845 00:31:55,455 --> 00:31:57,039 I think so. Where the F is it? 846 00:31:57,040 --> 00:31:58,916 I swear I parked here. 847 00:31:58,917 --> 00:32:00,793 We've been walking forever, and these stupid Sugar Floaties 848 00:32:00,794 --> 00:32:02,461 are giving me horrible blisters. 849 00:32:02,462 --> 00:32:06,257 Get over it. You look good. 850 00:32:06,258 --> 00:32:08,467 Oh, no, it's Deborah. 851 00:32:08,468 --> 00:32:10,511 I'm gonna have to tell her about Bruno. 852 00:32:10,512 --> 00:32:11,929 - Hey. - Hey. 853 00:32:11,930 --> 00:32:13,305 I know you've been working 854 00:32:13,306 --> 00:32:15,474 on getting us Bruno Fox for the Diva, 855 00:32:15,475 --> 00:32:17,268 but I've changed my mind. 856 00:32:17,269 --> 00:32:19,437 Oh, no. Why? 857 00:32:19,438 --> 00:32:21,605 We're scaling way back. 858 00:32:21,606 --> 00:32:23,691 I selflessly have given up 859 00:32:23,692 --> 00:32:25,693 on the idea of erecting a giant statue of myself. 860 00:32:25,694 --> 00:32:27,111 It--it's a tragedy. 861 00:32:27,112 --> 00:32:29,321 Jimmy, you should have seen the breasts. 862 00:32:29,322 --> 00:32:33,075 And we are scrapping the whole idea of a big theater entirely. 863 00:32:33,076 --> 00:32:35,453 Instead it's gonna be a proper comedy club-- 864 00:32:35,454 --> 00:32:37,288 you know, intimate, old school, 865 00:32:37,289 --> 00:32:39,123 you know, a place where emerging comics 866 00:32:39,124 --> 00:32:41,333 have a chance to hone their voices. 867 00:32:41,334 --> 00:32:43,085 I actually think that's really cool. 868 00:32:43,086 --> 00:32:45,254 Great. Well, I hope you didn't go to any trouble. 869 00:32:45,255 --> 00:32:46,922 Oh, no. 870 00:32:46,923 --> 00:32:48,674 - No trouble at all. - Good. 871 00:32:48,675 --> 00:32:50,801 - Okay, Let's talk soon. - Bye. 872 00:32:50,802 --> 00:32:53,137 Well, she doesn't want Bruno. 873 00:32:53,138 --> 00:32:55,306 So I guess we got bedbugs for nothing. 874 00:32:55,307 --> 00:32:57,975 Oh, I think that's it! Yes! 875 00:32:57,976 --> 00:32:59,602 Oh, thank God. 876 00:32:59,603 --> 00:33:01,520 - My car! - Hey! 877 00:33:01,521 --> 00:33:03,105 Hey, wait! Wait, wait! 878 00:33:03,106 --> 00:33:04,899 We paid for parking. Wait. 879 00:33:04,900 --> 00:33:07,902 Daddy? What the hell? 880 00:33:07,903 --> 00:33:11,197 My God, have you no dignity? Cover up. 881 00:33:11,198 --> 00:33:13,324 Uh, I am covered. It's a full blouse. 882 00:33:13,325 --> 00:33:14,700 I'm talking to Jimmy. 883 00:33:14,701 --> 00:33:16,577 You look like two Hannah Montanas. 884 00:33:16,578 --> 00:33:17,828 Hannah Montana was two people, 885 00:33:17,829 --> 00:33:19,580 you fucking moron. 886 00:33:19,581 --> 00:33:22,041 We got bedbugs, and we had to go to Sassafras. 887 00:33:22,042 --> 00:33:24,335 - What about the chokers? - They complete the look. 888 00:33:24,336 --> 00:33:25,628 Apparently, they complete the look. 889 00:33:25,629 --> 00:33:28,547 Mm, I'm taking your Porsche back, Kayla. 890 00:33:28,548 --> 00:33:31,425 What? You can't take back a 31st-birthday gift, 891 00:33:31,426 --> 00:33:32,635 you crazy psycho! 892 00:33:32,636 --> 00:33:34,220 See, I heard what you did. 893 00:33:34,221 --> 00:33:36,514 You talked Bruno into turning himself in. 894 00:33:36,515 --> 00:33:38,474 Why didn't you just leverage it, 895 00:33:38,475 --> 00:33:39,850 offer to keep his secret 896 00:33:39,851 --> 00:33:42,019 if he did your stupid fucking residency? 897 00:33:42,020 --> 00:33:44,146 It's about closure for the family! 898 00:33:44,147 --> 00:33:47,691 Well, losing your car is just the beginning, Kayla. 899 00:33:47,692 --> 00:33:49,401 You see, our most valuable asset-- 900 00:33:49,402 --> 00:33:51,445 it's not our money. 901 00:33:51,446 --> 00:33:54,490 It is the Schaefer family name, and you are sullying it. 902 00:33:54,491 --> 00:33:56,659 Whatever. Who cares? 903 00:33:56,660 --> 00:33:59,453 I'm not paying for your bullshit anymore. 904 00:33:59,454 --> 00:34:02,164 - Your trust fund's gone. - Wait, what? 905 00:34:02,165 --> 00:34:03,874 And say goodbye to your fancy office. 906 00:34:03,875 --> 00:34:08,462 Good luck running your pathetic fucking company now. 907 00:34:08,463 --> 00:34:10,882 Let's go! 908 00:34:16,471 --> 00:34:18,014 Fuck!